Intimacy is a high stakes endeavor for Mars in Scorpio, because he goes all the way. Sex with Scorpio pushes the boundaries and will touch both of you at the deepest possible level. It will be obvious if he’s into you, but he is cautious about who he gets close too. Not everyone can handle his brand of intimacy, and not everyone meets his criteria. Think you’ve got what it takes to tangle with Mars in Scorpio?
If Mars in Scorpio is into you, she’ll have been observing you for awhile. She’s a cautious creature who wants to make sure that you meet her internal criteria before she approaches you. She’ll have no doubts about her initial attraction, because it’s usually immediate and compulsive. That’s not what she’s figuring out. She’s making sure that you have the capacity for depth and courage. She doesn’t do timid or superficial. If you make the first move (she’ll radiate a certain kind of intensity that’s irresistible for some) she may turn you down. Either she’s not into you, and there’s nothing you can do to change her mind. Or she is into you, but she’s not ready. She prefers to make the first move, because she likes having control.
Once Mars in Scorpio decides it’s go time, there will be no coy flirtations. He’ll make a direct approach, and will want a one-on-one meeting (no group activities). A first date may not be entirely comfortable for you. At this point, much depends on how you handle intensity. Expect unnervingly prolonged eye contact and some deep silences. When he talks, he may share some weirdly intimate things. Even if he doesn’t physically touch you, you’ll feel like he’s trying to get under your skin. You may fill the silences with nervous chatter, and that will tell him a lot about you. You may shy away from the eye contact, and that will also give him essential information on how you handle his energy. You see, he’s evaluating you. He’ll be able to tell almost immediately if you have the capacity to handle his intensity, or if he scares you. He’s aware that many people simply cannot go as deep as he wants to go, and he’s not interested in wasting his time. By the end of the date, he’ll know if there’s going to be a second date, although you may have no idea. First date sex probably won’t happen, even if the chemistry is off the charts.
Into the Depths
Mars in Scorpio may not ask you out again, even if you think things went swimmingly. She’s got her own internal evaluation system, and if something feels a bit off, it’s a no go. There are any number of things that you might have done to turn her off, but most likely they involved her sense that somehow you couldn’t match her desires. This is a cliché, but for Mars in Scorpio, it is mostly about the sex. But sex is not just a physical release for her; it’s how she understands herself, her desires, and her attraction to you. It’s discovery and analysis through physical sensation and emotional intensity. Her primary objective is to learn about herself, which doesn’t sound very sexy. But she’s driven to explore her physical and emotional limits by going places that few people will go. If you get past the first date, she’ll want to go there with you.
If things progress with Mars in Scorpio, you’ll find a loyal, passionate, demanding lover. Forget about going-through-the-motions sex. Intimacy will be about how much you and he can handle. The more courageous you are in the bedroom, the better. If you somehow manage to push his sexual limits, you’ll be his dream partner. But he’ll be calling the shots. It’s his journey, and you’re along for the ride. You’ll learn about his capacity for jealousy and control, but also his ability to support and heal you. He has immense resilience; it’s almost impossible to scare him off or weaken him. He wants to see every part of you, especially the ugly parts. The stuff that you keep hidden turns him on more than anything.
It takes a lot to push Mars in Scorpio out the door. But your inability to go deep with her will be a guaranteed turn-off. Or, if you lose interest in having sex, that will also push her away. Sex is a regenerative necessity for her. The other deal breaker is betrayal. If you betray her trust (through infidelity or by sharing her secrets) she won’t give you a second chance. There will be no back and forth, and no discussion. There may be an eruption of frightening temper on her part, and (if she’s vibing Lower Scorpio) vengeful actions. But she’ll cut you off and it will be like all those months or years of intimacy never happened. She’ll just be gone. Sometimes this will happen if she senses she’s outgrown you, since she is a creature of evolution. Either way, it’s a survival impulse for her. She never goes backwards, because she is slowly and constantly transforming.[/show_to]