How To Tell if a Mars in Libra Man or Woman Is Into You


Credit: g_studio via iStockphoto

Credit: svetikd via iStockphoto


It’s not difficult to figure out if Mars in Libra wants you. He’ll flirt like crazy, and make you feel like you’re the only person in the room. But he’s capable of doing this with many people, whether or not he’s in a relationship. This planet/sign combo is hardwired to charm the pants off anyone he finds attractive. How do you know if he’s serious about you?

The Dance

Libra is a Cardinal sign, on the same axis as Aries. Mars in Libra will make the first move if she wants you. But Libra is Aries’ opposite sign, and is ruled by Venus (the planet of attraction). This makes Mars in Libra’s actions indirect. She may initiate polite conversation with a flirtatious subtext. She may toss out a couple of random comments that are slightly suggestive, but not over-the-top. She’s testing the waters at this point, because she’s not going to embarrass herself by chasing after someone who’s not interested. She loathes embarrassing situations.

If you’re interested, it’s up to you to let Mars in Libra know. He made the first step, now you must take the next step towards him. Mars in Libra instinctively knows the rhythms of social interactions, and he wants a dancing partner. You can be assertive (this will make things easier for him) but never crude. He wants things to remain civil, no matter how hot the first date gets. You’re safe if you don’t do anything embarrassing. Even if he engages you in some lightly confrontational teasing, you must keep things at a socially acceptable level. Mars in Libra wants to have an energetic exchange with you. He gives, you give. He pushes you (lightly) and you push back.

This all sounds rather complicated, and to be honest, you probably won’t be aware of these intricacies as you’re getting to know him. He’s so good at courting that you’ll just think you’ve found the perfect partner. He’ll be sensitive, but not a pushover. He’ll always say the right thing, and will time his actions perfectly. Where do you want to go on the next date? It will be your call. If you’ve started having sex (this could happen on the first date, or he could wait awhile…it will be up to you) he’ll be attentive and will know where and how to touch you.

Next Steps

At this point, it must be said that Mars in Libra doesn’t always want a committed relationship. Sex may be “just sex,” or a prelude to something more. You’ll know very quickly where Mars in Libra stands. If she decides this is a fling, she’ll avoid attempts to take things further. She won’t come right out and say it, but her actions will not be aligned with commitment. The sex may continue, but there will be no “meet the parents.” Discussions about the future will be vague. She may pull a fade-away, because it will be easier than having an uncomfortable discussion.

If the relationship with Mars in Libra progresses, you’ll notice that your seemingly perfect partner is actually quite complicated. She’ll be uncomfortable with full-on arguments. If you confront her about something, she’ll attempt to minimize the situation, or placate you. The angrier you get, the more she’ll sidestep, claiming there’s no reason for you to get upset, everything’s fine, etc. The kicker is, if she’s unhappy, she’ll be passive-aggressive. If you confront her about this, she’ll deny, deny, deny. This manipulation can continue to the point where it seriously damages your relationship. If she’s self-aware, she’ll be more comfortable with expressing her displeasure. But Mars in Libra will never embrace raw confrontation. If getting it all out in the open is your style, she may not be the partner for you. Repeatedly pummeling her with verbal barrages will eventually push her out the door. She wants harmony, and she’ll only meet you halfway if you approach her from a position of compromise.

Sexually, Mars in Libra’s ultimate desire is to achieve a balanced union. The ideal manifestation of this would be sex as an equitable exchange. But this can become distorted if he focuses so much on your desires that he ignores his own. When having sex with Mars in Libra, you must ensure that you give back. It will be easy to take, because he’ll be so tuned into you.What turns him on the most is how hot he makes you. If you ask him what he wants, he may not come right out and tell you. It will be up to you to tune into his body language and figure it out. He’ll probably be a bit on the passive side, so you’ll have to take the lead.

Now, what about that flirting? Even if Mars in Libra has met her match in you, she will always be attracted to other people. She develops self-awareness through comparison and contrast, so she’s wired to explore multiple attractions. That cute little hook she used to first get your attention? She’ll use it again (or a variation thereof) and she may not be fully aware she’s doing it. Flirting is instinctive for her, so you’ll need to decide if you can live with that. The good news is, she can (and will) remain totally faithful to you if she’s happy in the relationship, and if the rest of her chart implies she’s ready for monogamy. She won’t necessarily act on her attractions, and they may not go any further than her imagination (or the occasional comment). If you lay out an acceptable/unacceptable scenario regarding your comfort level with flirting, you’ll be surprised at her willingness to comply. After all, Mars in Libra loves a good compromise.

About Nadia Gilchrist

Nadia Gilchrist offers over 19 years of experience in astrology. Her writings and personal consultations focus on applying practical astrological analysis to the real world. Nadia blogs regularly at Ruby Slipper Astrology.


  1. This is EXACTLY right, thank you!

  2. My Pluto in Libra often attracts venus and mars in Libra.
    Luckily my venus in Capricorn demands a bit more substance.

  3. @X
    you’re welcome…glad you enjoyed it!

  4. @Dotty
    perfect example of the square between these signs…Capricorn’s substance challenges Libra’s lightness.

  5. My man’s Mars in Libra squares my Capricorn Mars and conjuncts my Asc. I can agree on all points except for flirting. It might be that he has Pluto on his Libra sun as well. His passive aggressive behaviour comes through the smallest things, such as I tell him the time to meet up, but he wants to do something else just before our date, so he agrees on the said time and shows up 1 hour late. It frustrated me at first, then I tried confronting him. He agreed to everything and kept doing what he was doing haha. Eventually I just gave up and expect some things from him that I we laugh at after.

    In terms of courting and dating, he was not passive at all, but does admit that he avoids action if women pursue.

    Sometimes he frustrates me with his behaviour for no reason

  6. @Artsy
    “He agreed to everything and kept doing what he was doing.”
    That’s Mars in Libra, in a nutshell.

  7. I am Mars in Libra and I will break up with you by text message.

  8. Elenaforte says:

    “He agreed to everything and kept doing what he was doing.”
    😀 This bit made me laugh hard, really. I just realised I go late to work, apologise and still do it.

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