Synastry and composite aspects work in very different ways. The differences can be confusing, especially if the same planets are used. If the energies of the synastry and composite planets are the same, doesn’t that mean the impact on a relationship will be the same? Not at all. Understanding this is the key to handling the energies between you and your partner.
First, it helps to know how synastry and composite charts work. Synastry is the impact you and your partner have on each other. The composite chart is the energy of the relationship. The biggest difference is that you have more control over a synastry aspect than a composite aspect. That’s because you are one half of the synastry aspect. And if your partner agrees to work with you, together you stand a good chance of moderating or enhancing that aspect’s impact on your lives. Obviously, you can’t completely erase a Venus/Saturn square between you, but you can certainly tackle it together. Composite aspects are more challenging, because you can’t approach them as you working on your planet, while your partner deals with their planet. Composite aspects are like natal aspects of a third entity. If you’ve ever been in a relationship that takes on a life of its own, or where you feel like a totally different person, that’s the composite chart in action.
As an example, let’s take a Moon/Saturn square. With a synastric aspect, the Moon person may feel emotionally shut down or controlled by the Saturn person, because Moon’s needs and emotional responses challenge Saturn’ rules. Saturn has his defenses up, and doesn’t give Moon what she needs, or he acts like a strict parent. The solution would be for Saturn to acknowledge that he holds Moon at arm’s length and/or attempts to control her. Moon would have to acknowledge what her needs are, and if she takes on the role of child, in response to Saturn. Saturn can lower his defenses a touch, while acknowledging that he’s looking for rules, and she offers feelings in return. With self-awareness from both parties, there can be a significant shift away from tension, towards security and stability.
Now, let’s look at a composite Moon/Saturn square. This is an indicator of emotional distance in a relationship. How and why will be described by the composite house positions. 5th House composite Saturn square 2nd House composite Moon suggests this couple’s responsibilities to their children might place a financial (2nd House) burden on them. There will be a constant feeling of insecurity (Moon) plus the sense that their needs (together) are never fully met. Maybe their child is disabled, and takes up all their time and energy. There’s little left over for them. Or, if they don’t have children, maybe something about their chemistry together makes it difficult to cut loose and have fun (another 5th House area). That sensation of being a bit stiff and formal within the relationship will create emotional barriers.
This feeling between them will never change. And it will actually grow stronger over time; the longer a couple is together, the stronger all the composite energies become. They can work around their Moon/Saturn square by using any harmonious composite aspects. For example, if the Moon trines composite Venus in the 6th House of daily routine, they can express their love for each other through the practical things they do. But that feeling that they can’t quite get close to each other will not change. On the plus side, as with the synastry aspect, this can indicate commitment. But if one of the partners can’t live without a deep emotional merging, this relationship may not cut it. I receive many enquiries asking what the fix is for a particularly difficult composite aspect. The answer is, there is no fix. You either accept that it will always be part of your relationship (and you and your partner work around it) or you move on.
Referring to last week’s article, a composite Mars/Pluto aspect will always be a sore spot in the relationship. Even if the couple is on the ball and ready to work with that Pluto polarity point, the volatile energies of Mars/Pluto will always exist between them. They can become more attuned to the warning signs of a flare-up, but the aspect will not magically dissolve. However, if the relationship evolves, they’ll be better equipped to handle it. Habitual fear-based reactions will still occur, but at least they’ll know why, and will be able to respond effectively — assuming both parties want to evolve.