Venus and the other planets in the natal chart talk to each other through connecting aspects. The resulting conversation strongly influences how you love and who you attract. Venus trine Jupiter will create a warm, generous love, while a conjunction to Pluto will smolder away at one love interest. But what happens if there is no communication between Venus and the rest of your chart?
If someone’s natal Venus makes no major aspects to the other planets in their chart, it is considered to be unaspected. Major aspects are defined as conjunctions, oppositions, squares, trines and sextiles. It’s rare that any natal planet is not connected by a major aspect. When it does happen, the energy of this rogue planet is not integrated into the rest of the chart. Like the unstable cousin locked away in the attic, it’s mostly quiet but unpredictable.
Let’s say Melanie has an unaspected Venus. She has always doubted that she is lovable, or even likeable. She questions her ability to relate to other people. Relationships are a challenge: she is constantly searching for the right man. When she is involved with someone, she has a nagging feeling that there is “more” out there. She is convinced that she is missing something that everyone else seems to have. Her unaspected Venus is the blind spot she is always looking for.
In spite of these issues, Melanie has been involved with Joe for two years. A look at their synastry reveals that Joe’s Sun conjuncts Melanie’s Venus, illuminating her blind spot. When they are together, she feels better about herself. The urge to keep searching subsides and she feels safe with Joe. Without being aware of it, she is able to act out the dormant energy of her Venus. And they both lived happily ever after. Right?
Wrong. Melanie’s relationship with Joe is an eventful beginning rather then a happy ending. Her Venus is still unaspected, even though it’s modified by Joe’s Sun. One of Joe’s complaints is that Melanie seems unable to express her love for him when he needs it. She’s great at displaying spontaneous bursts of affection such as buying him flowers for no reason. And at times she’s so giving it seems her entire existence is devoted to making him happy. But if he actively reaches out for her support, she is emotionally absent. Is she being manipulative? Passive aggressive?
[show_to accesslevel=’All-Access’]One of the maddening things about an unaspected Venus is that the minute its energy is needed, it seems to disappear. In the moment, Melanie doubts that she feels anything at all for Joe. But when the pressure is off, she feels she can become the perfect girlfriend. This “all or nothing” approach is due to the fact that her Venus is undiluted by any other planetary energy in her chart. The urge to empathize, to harmonize, to be someone’s partner … all these things are amped up when she is able to access them. Swinging back and forth from cool distance to devoted lover can be very frustrating for both partners. And there is really no easy solution to this dynamic. The very nature of unaspected planets (hidden but prominent) makes them slippery to deal with.
The good news is that simply being aware of an unaspected Venus makes it easier to handle. Realize that feeling unlovable does not make it so. Understand that the insecurity will always be there, but it has nothing to do with the actual relationship. Pay attention to future transits and progressions that activate your Venus: these are opportunities to achieve breakthroughs in coming to terms with its energy.
Remember, unaspected planets are undiluted, so they contain huge potential. Many people with an unaspected Venus find that they have an innate talent for harmonizing or diplomacy. If you look to the houses in your chart that are ruled by Venus (the house cusps would be in Libra and Taurus) you will see the areas of your life where this energy can be expressed most easily. Revisiting Melanie for a second, let’s say that her Tenth House (career and public image) is ruled by Venus. If she exploits this potential by pursuing a career in Human Resources, her confidence soars. Now that her unaspected Venus is being activated, she is able to give Joe a steadier flow of love and support.
It takes courage to live with an unaspected Venus. With time and awareness, it is possible to tame this rogue planet and have it work in your favor. It is a rare gift to have this kind of energy at your disposal.[/show_to]