It’s Hell Being a Libra Nowadays!

Saturn in LibraOnce upon a time, there was a nice little sign named Libra. It was a charming sign, and everyone was happy to be around it. It threw memorable dinner parties with candles and pretty floral centerpieces and tiny portions of trendy gourmet cuisine. There were place cards to tell you where to sit, and the guests to your left and right would be pleasant, interesting companions chosen with you in mind. An invitation from Libra was a much hoped for social coup.

Libra was quite a catch for some lucky partner – easy on the eyes, fashionably and elegantly dressed, and given to the most romantic gestures. You’d smile to find a note tucked in your pocket saying what a divine lover you were last night. You knew you were the center of Libra’s world, the sole reason for Libra’s existence. Libra was all about loving and nothing but loving, you see, in much the same way that Virgo lived to work and Cancer was totally centered on the family.

That was Libra back then, and the zodiac was a far more agreeable place for its existence. Things began to change, ever so slowly, in 1942, when Neptune moved in with Libra. Oh, at first it was idyllic – a fairy tale, Hollywood movie, happily-ever-after type of romance that thrilled Libra to the core of its being.

Libra gradually lost itself, caught up in the all-consuming presence of a soft, sensitive soulmate who admittedly wasn’t making the most of those special talents but could become somebody if Libra only found the right way to help.

Over time, Neptune’s frailties and flaws became more and more apparent. The relationship ate up more and more of Libra’s energy, but there was no leaving because Libra was totally committed. And, besides, what would people say? In those days, divorce was just not an option for Nice, Respectable People.

In 1950, Saturn came on the scene and started piling more and more responsibilities on Libra – bills to pay, standards to live up to, deadlines to meet. Neptune by that time was too depressed, dysfunctional – and frankly, drunk – to carry much of the load, as well as only intermittently employed. The burdens all fell on Libra’s shoulders.

That whole era is a muddle of misery. Libra will never forget those wrenching, humiliating scenes in 1951-2 when Saturn confronted Neptune directly. At that point, Neptune – along with the partnership – completely broke down. Though it was the hardest thing Libra ever had done (up to then), Neptune was asked to leave in October of 1953.

For years afterward, Libra was too discouraged and disillusioned to even contemplate getting involved again. But you have to remember that Libra lives to love and feels incomplete without a partner. That never changes. And so in 1968, Libra fell head over heels with Uranus, a younger but more exciting romantic prospect than had come along in years.

Uranus had panache, charisma, and an avant-garde style that was utterly impossible to resist. Libra had always preferred intelligent companions, and didn’t mind a heated discussion so long as both points of view were considered. Uranus was possessed of a dazzling intellect and a unique viewpoint, though outspokenly scornful of others who weren’t quite so advanced in their thinking.

Then, too, there was the challenge of perpetual courtship. Uranus could be very there, 100% present one day and then suddenly disappear for months on end with no explanation. Oh, Uranus was up front about not believing in commitment, but nobody had ever been able to resist Libra’s charm and glamour, so Libra was confident it would work out.

This off again, on again affair lasted until 1975, kept alive by explosive breakups and sudden, whirlwind reunions. It was nothing if not romantic, and Libra secretly enjoyed the intervals of being single and not having to adapt to Uranus’ quirky, erratic lifestyle and forceful opinions.

Regarding two applesBesides, Libra’s carnal needs were being met by a covert relationship with a married lover once Pluto showed up in 1971. No one knew about it because Libra cannot tolerate scandal or looking bad.

Pluto pursued Libra, who was slowly, unwillingly seduced into seamy yet steamy couplings whenever Pluto was available. As ambivalent as Libra was about being used as a sexual convenience rather than treated as a treasured partner, the intense passion that never waned kept the relationship going for years.

Saturn returned in 1980 and started nagging Libra about respectability, financial security and the need to find a more permanent arrangement to sustain Libra in those fast-approaching senior years. Then, too, Pluto died in 1984, along Libra’s capacity to believe in a lifelong, committed relationship based on true love and devotion.

Libra has never been the same since, though the charm and style remains and Libra is as attractive as ever. There are lovers and probably always will be, but Libra doesn’t really believe love will last. The romantic game is played half-heartedly, with one eye on an escape route in case things aren’t as good as they look on the surface.

Saturn’s reappearance last October made Libra very sad – maybe even clinically depressed. The relentless progression of years, even with the aid of cosmetic surgery, makes it so very hard to look good, and those scanty, frankly sexual modern styles just aren’t appropriate on someone Libra’s age.

Being alone has taken its toll – it would be so good to have a companion right there at home without making such an effort all the time. Not to mention that sharing the bills and medical insurance costs with someone would be a relief. So, yeah, Libra is depressed and worried.

Being a Libra in 2010 is hell. We don’t know the real Libra today, only the frantic, people-pleasing Libra that has evolved since the 1940s. You would have been totally enamored of the charming, loving Libra of a more spacious, gracious yesteryear – one of the highlights of the zodiac, and a joy to be around.

Saturn Responds

Excuse me, but you’re not getting an accurate picture here. I’m Saturn, and it’s only fair for me to be able to tell my side of the story. You’re making me out to be the bad guy that comes around every 29 or 30 years to make Libra’s life miserable. You make it sound like all I do is make demands, criticize lovers, and generally put a damper on relationships.

I’d like to point out that the last couple of times I came around, I was the voice of sanity when Libra was involved with thoroughly undesirable partners. In the 1940s, it was that loser Neptune that never carried its own weight. And in the mid-1980s, it was that seamy Pluto that was just out for sex and not for commitment. Neither one of them treated Libra right. It was never the equal partnership Libra deserved. And Libra couldn’t seem to set any limits, so I had to be the one to do it.

So now another full cycle has gone by, and Libra’s not getting any younger. It’s time for Libra to take a good look at what love is all about and learn to set some boundaries. Since the last time I was here, I’ve gotten certified as a life coach, and so Libra came to consult me about how to have a more mature and satisfying relationship. We’re working together, and in our sessions, we’re looking back at these past affairs to see why they were so tempting.

Mistakes are only bad if you never learn anything from them – better late than never – and Libra’s ready to learn some new ways of connecting now. I’m feeling good about what’s happening, and so is Libra. I’m cautiously optimistic about the outcome. A mature relationship can be the best one of all.

About the Author

Donna Cunningham, MSW is internationally-respected for her many books, articles, and columns on astrology, flower essences, and other metaphysical topics. She now teaches writing by teleseminar and correspondence course, as well as teleseminars and a correspondence course on astrology. Order her books at Moon Maven Publications and visit her blog.

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  1. im not a libra sun myself but i do have libra saturn i will be facing my saturn return in sept/oct which scares the shits out of me!
    i do know a few libras and some have been having a very hard time recently .this worrys me most because i know a few virgo suns and the past three years have been both a growing experience for them and incredibly difficult with relationship problems , and health issues ,psychological issues even two attempting/threatening suicide – i saw many virgos life fall apart-most of started just before saturn went into their sign.
    i feel sympathy for anyone who has to go through these tough planet transits .
    my worse time was when i was a youngster saturn was leaving capricorn going into aqaurius but the worst came of it when saturn left aquarius – i think it’s how you deal with saturn while it transits that will show us ultimately how and if we can survive the changes and turmiol it often brings .
    and i think it depends on the individuals charts a whole some people handle transits from saturn and pluto much better than others and others will actually benefit all round from the lessons saturn gives.

  2. The way in which many Librans have grown and evolved– if they’ve played their cards right– is going to make things sucky for some non-Librans who take advantage of them.

    I don’t know about anyone else, but Saturn’s transit into my sign of Libra is the best thing that’s happened to me in a long, long time. I haven’t felt this disciplined and settled and balanced in… in… Um, ever.

    Brilliant article!

  3. VirgoWoman says:

    This is a very interesting article. It also scares me to death!

    I am Virgo Sun/Moon/Pluto. While Saturn was transiting through Virgo, I started a business and failed dismally. Now I am looking at having to start my financial base over from scratch at an older age…in a horrible economy.

    I am Libra Ascendant/Venus/Mercury, my second most populous sign for personal planets. Another few years of Saturn heavily influencing my chart you say? Can I just give up now? LOL I’m not giving up, but good grief!

    The first Capricorn man I’ve ever been attracted to came into my life a couple weeks ago while Saturn sits directly conjunct my Libra Ascendant. Bossy, bossy, bossy…not my style. But I do feel like there is something almost karmic to learn from him, and/or something that he is supposed to learn from me. It’s obviously not going to be easy, but it’s probably temporary anyway. Hmmmm….did you mention the word “ambilvalent”?

    Can I just go back to having fun now???

    Again great article! Thanks much!

  4. i am a libra. im still not sure if i understand why this is a time that is most difficult for libras? i was depressed last year but i finally got out of that state. what will happen when saturn conjuncts my sun? oh dear.

  5. I am a Libra with Sun at 4º and NO, it is not hell being a Libra at the moment, I would define hell very differently, if anything, this time is moving me towards long awaited goals.

  6. Hi…I have Saturn going through my 12th house at the moment(I’m scorpio going through my first saturn return).It has not been a picnic.I’m feeling very much like it’s me against the world…especially in relationships.

  7. Donna,
    Excellent Article! Right on Point..

    “Libra has never been the same since…”
    “There are lovers and probably always will be, but Libra doesn’t really believe love will last. The romantic game is played half-heartedly, with one eye on an escape route in case things aren’t as good as they look on the surface.”…
    You have helped clarify so much about what my Libra friend is going through….
    One Question for you:
    After the Neptunian relationship he had with his daughters mother…
    The Uranius relationship he had with his Ex…
    And the secret Plutonian relationship he had with the married woman……
    I come along… Where do I stand now that Saturn is back in his sign? And is Love enough for Saturn?

  8. So that explains alot! My husband is Libra and sometimes it hard to live with him as well! He’s still charming when he wants to be and 100% committed to our marriage too.

  9. I think all those outer planet transits can actually mature a sign rather than make them weak. I think the libras of today are stronger for them than the libras of yesteryear.

  10. JuliaAna says:

    Hey Donna,

    That was a brillant article! I really loved it! Good story; It will make a good musical! The Life and Passions of Beloved Libra, maybe?
    I have Saturn exactly on my MC and Neptune both in Libra in the 10th, so you can see how and why I was facinated by that article!
    I’m having a Saturn Return now and Thank Goddess my Neptune isn’t conjunct my Saturn! Yep it could always be worse! On your T-Square Saturn test I only scored 31! I hope my Libra and Saturn can work things out this time around.
    Thank you for the lila, the eternal dance of life, insight. Blessings!

  11. Donna, your works have been great teachers in my longtime study of astrology.
    i was born in july 1953- saturn/neptune exact conjunction. my saturn return
    in 1982 conjunct neptune as well. life has taught me well…and your article
    is absolutely accurate!
    in retrospect, i recognize how i have lived it, and continue dancing with these strange bedfellows, living with it still.
    one of liz greene’s books on outer planets simply said “the saturn-neptune
    group…god help them” would you care to clarify? i find it to be like standing half-in and half out of a boat, trying to balance [and not fall in]

    i enjoyed reading your libra/saturn ideas very much!

  12. goatfishstail says:

    Brilliant article- Donna, I am smitten. What a lovely way to combine astrology and creative writing.
    Since I studied your books in midnineties I know you are very accomplished- and you made my day once more.
    Capricorn sun in twelve, aquarius rising sends love and adoration.

  13. I am a libra and I have a hard to finding a soul mate, never married, just cannot find the right one to balance the scales, any help?

  14. single
    I just met my soul mate last year and I’m 40. I used to feel that it was hopeless and I just didn’t have a soul mate, but we found eachother, both had a crappy life first but then we met. Sometimes fate makes us wait a long time but you have to know that you have a soul mate, I was married to a Libra man, we didn’t love eachother sort of clinging to an ideal of what love would be like but it nevfer happened, that was 5 yrs, then we broke up for 10 years, I didn;t even go out with men, big dry spell. I met a nice Aqua guy but that didn;t last then when I got fed up and decided that It wasn;t going to happen for me, I met another Aqua Man, we’ve been together for a year now and he is my best friend….Love finds you, you can’t find it, it gets you……..

  15. single
    Oh btw, what helps is hanging out with friends, enjoying yourself, like who you are, when you walk with your head up for some reason, Scorps and Aquas appear out of nowhere, LOL

  16. librapink09 says:

    It’s been hard being a Libra all my life, I think all the other aspects in my chart rule out any qualities of being a Libra, all I have is the flaws really gullible, indecisive, and overly optimistic, I keep thinking things will get better but for the past 19 years of my life have been hell so now I’m just going day by day just waiting to die or be murdered.

  17. anotherlibra says:

    @librapink09: the first step is knowing your flaws, and they are not really flaws, are they? Flaws would be unfaithful, bossy, argumentative, etc. Being a Libra you already possess all the sign’s good qualities. Just focus on them. You are a good person and you deserve happiness!! I really do hope you stay positive and things start going your way. I also have had a really bad 7 years. We all have and you are not alone! We feel your pain! Apparently Saturn will be gone by 5 Oct this year. So I am looking forward to that and so should you!

  18. Being a scorp myself and with an asc on scorp, i feel i can answer this.

    Between 2009 and 2012 libra has saturn conjunct the sun. Earlier it was in the 12th house of virgo. Currently i have saturn in the 12th house. The first house transit how well or poor the result depends on the homework that the 12th house transit forces one to do.

    Reviewing the 12th house transit: The 12th house is subconscious, downright underworld rather beneath the seabed. Every thought, action and every interpersonal influence has been recorded in it including the time when your grandma sneezed.

    Saturn in the 12th house deals with evacuating your mental bowels, it is like a laxative, not very pleasant but very helpful. In most cases people dont even realise that their very worst enemy is right under their nose and the very habits that they thought healthy are infact downright unhealthy.

    In my case my early future was crushed by a over domineering mother who was corrupt to the core, with her came hoardes of other toxic relations like my in laws, uncle etc. Little did i realise before the transit the extent of toxicity that these people contained, my life was stalemated. With the demise of my mother during the transit, the ones that were brought in by mother too separated and today my life is free flowing. As i said saturn in the 12th house relieves you of a life time constipation.

    My libran wife being a scorp ascendant has the 12th house transit as well i.e when she went no contact over her narcissistic mother. Ofcourse the drama wasnt easy, it involved litigation and other stuff.

    I was addicted to coffee and to power training. Coffee increases your power training and power training increases coffee craving. Finally i went on and had a full blown panic attack and an anxiety disorder that lasted 6 months. Despite being a medical person, i seldom realised the evil of coffee and power training that it can have on the heart. Believe me it is deadly. I quit both cold turkey. Meaning to say the transit breaks your addictions.

    Saturn transiting the 12th house can lead to suicidal ideations, but is passing, pls dont act on it.

    Saturn in the 12th house can lead to fear of confinement like in hospitals and prisons or monasteries. The last is great, visiting an ancient monastery can be mystifing, but not so an illness.

    Saturn in the 12th house tamed my wilder instincts and has made me hermetic.

    Now if the above homework has been done, the 1st house transit should be a rewarding experience. Since libra is a light hearted sign, such heaviness does not augur well with it.

    The author has hit it right with pluto transiting libra. Libra being the 12th house to scorp, the temptation to an extramarital affair with a scorp is high in this generation, i have been the recipient of such libran overtures, but i have kept my limits and character.

  19. NewlyWedLibraLady says:

    You know what the toughest part of being a Libra is? Having to explain what you mean, having to explain to one person you love meant to the other person that you love, its frustrating having to be the person in the family that acts like an emotional translator. Everyone seems to see the world in black and white and for us Libras we are in the gray area. I remember explaining to my parents what my baby brother meant what my older brother meant. Then as time went on explaining to the teachers what a class mate meant or what one friend said to the other etc. My Aquarius husband and my Scorpio Mom think a lot alike but don’t speak the same language with expressions, they both believe in fair, they both believe in feelings come before logic, that’s good but sometimes it doesn’t sound like they know what the other is saying, my brother is a Sag, anyone would think that he is my Moms favorite , she loves him so much just like my older brother and I, its all equal just different. but sometimes they clash, and OMG it’s not good, he is all headstrong and she is hurt so what does a Scorpio do when they are hurt, they get quiet and begin to brew on it over and over trying to make it all make sense, which with a Sag, life just doesn’t make sense. I try to get him to see what he is doing and sometimes he gets it and fixes things, which clears up the clouds, with my Mom the more she loves you the more she hurts if you insult her, the more she will get mad at you and impatient. I learned a long time ago that I am her favorite just by her behavior. If I ever did anything that would lead to harming myself or even being unhappy in the future, she would get really mad at me LOL, my Sag brother doesn’t understand this, its how she loves, she worries about everyone in the family, even my husband which she keeps assuring me that she doesn’t hate, hes not like my ex, she likes him. I know she likes him because she gets mad at him if he’s walking into trouble, but unlike my brother he understands. Her 3 grandchildren are all spoiled by her, one of them my son. She never looked at another man since she met my Dad and since he passed away in 2008 she has never had any interest in any other relationships, she is here for us, for her grand kids and for my Dad, she does everything that she thinks he would do, my husband and I have that kind of love. So if you are a Libra woman and your life is a constant nightmare ha ha, marry an Aquarius man, if you are a Cancer man, marry a Scorpio woman, the love is endless.
    If you don’t like explaining everything, don’t be near anyone because you will always have to do this, everywhere you go, you are the talker, you are the explainer, you are the peace keeper, you are the fool at every party wondering if anyone felt ignored. Then you meet an Aquarius and they help you keep your marbles together. ha ha , or you meet a Scorpio, man or woman friend and they will always have your back, my Leo sister in law is wonderful too, she is great, she married a Scorpio man, they are like glue.

  20. As a Libra, I totally found the article and the comments of others very liberating. All that I’m going through now has explanations and I can breathe a sigh of relief in preparation for the next celestial onslaught.

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