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In the comments section of What keeps you from straying, two readers shared their experiences with trying to break up with an Aries:
Noctule: The Ram that latched onto me regarded me as their property to such an extent that breaking up was impossible. I even said that it was over, that I didn’t want anymore, and the Aries totally plowed that statement down and latched onto tighter…. I wonder if the majority of Ariens or people with heavy Arian influences are this oppressive and tunnelvisioned.
BlahBlah: I broke up with my [Aries] boyfriend in October of one year and he still considered us together all the way through February of the next year and kept pestering me about getting back together.
Aries is the “my way or the highway” sign of the zodiac. Being the first, its concern is its own needs, period. If you look at the progression of the signs of the zodiac from a developmental perspective, there is a movement from personal to relational to collective or transpersonal concerns. Just looking at the fire signs, you can see this progression: Aries is the initial burst of vitality, channeled towards initiating a project or satisfying an impulse. Leo concerns “play” as well as the need to be recognized (by an “other”) and to express warmth and generosity towards others. Sagittarius relates to one’s passion to explore the world and understand the codes of ethics/philosophy/religion that keep us functioning together as a society.
Aries can be egocentric. The sign opposite the Ram is Libra, which is all about taking into consideration the needs of others. The sign of the Scales balances the deficiencies of Aries. To some extent, Aries’ needs are the only needs that matter. If they’ve got an objective or desire, they’re going to hurtle down the track whether you hop on the train or not. The problem is that some Aries can be bullies, and they will pull you on board even if you don’t want to go along for the ride.
Comment below: Share your experiences with Aries … the good, the bad, the ugly.
I am an Aries and can vouch for the accuracy of what Jeff says. We tend to get swept up in the romance of things (or the lust of it; or both) and assume you’re right there with us. If you don’t play along, we’ll often try to push you to go along with us. It comes from a good place, though: we want you to feel as caught up in the moment as we are. The idea that you don’t feel the same is utterly baffling and ultimately heartbreaking. We’re really that naive about love.
“The idea that you don’t feel the same is utterly baffling and ultimately heartbreaking.”
So this explains my Aries friend and her search for love, by search I mean every guy she came in contact with-she was in love with-‘this is the one’-her actual words. I being a Capricorn would tell her to stop it and get a grip. But each time she believed it to be love, I learned to let her do her own thing-she would of done it anyway.
Yeah, I’ve got a cappy moon squaring my aries venus. When I was younger it was like watching myself participate in a train wreck I was unable/unwilling to stop… I’d just charge ahead in relationships, even if I felt doubtful and exposed. When it fell out badly — as it usually did — I always felt devastated. Only age and experience have allowed me to own my cappy heart and give it some say in love matters.
Thanks Anon 3:59 for sharing some insight from an Aries’ perspective. It really helps me understand the motivation and not just write Aries off as an unfeeling emotional bully.
I’m currently dealing with a guy who has Sag moon and Aries venus, and boy when he gets his feelings hurt, it’s a wrap. He can’t hear anything else and doesn’t care about anything else. To make matters even more complicated, his sun is in 7th house, so when he’s not riled up, he’s very Libran in behavior (constantly compromising, until the Aries venus kicks in and starts demanding reciprocation for stuff that HE WILLINGLY GAVE UP/AWAY). VERY confusing, to say the least.
@Anon 7:04,
I dated a Pisces with your same combo (Cappy moon, Aries venus – and mars, actually) and he was a peculiar mixture of caution and go-for-it! attitude. Between my Sag rising and his Aries moon, we both got carried away before our more cautious planets reigned us in.
How do you let your Cappy moon “have some say” when Aries venus doesn’t want to let her get a word in edgewise? 😉
I’m both 3:59 and 7:04.
The way I’ve learned to let my cappy moon have some input is to avoid snap decisions. I don’t make any moves without giving myself a cooling off period. This has required quite an adjustment in my generally spontaneous sexual nature. Usually my cooler heart can prevail in a day or two. Also, it helps having Mars in Taurus. If it were in Aries too I’d be in big trouble!
I have an Aries friend with very strong Pisces influences in her chart.
For a few years she was going out with one guy who had difficult family situation, just because she made firm decision that she was going to “save him”. Period.
That all is good feedback! Jeff’s comments seem to all have been pretty accurate as my experience goes with Aries. I am surrounded by many at this point in my life (both males and females) as well as many Geminis. All of the Aries seem to fall in and out of love all the time especially the females. As being a friend not involved with any of them (I am a capricorn and not really attracted to them and vice versa plus I am engaged to a wonderful man who is truly my better half!)it is amusing to listen to them although I can’t really relate (I also have one Leo friend who can’t seem to keep away from Drama in the romance dept. who is probably more entertaining than all of the Aries combined)
However, I had a question about one friend who’s Arian behavior has me confused as he is normally a pursuer and has no problems getting attention from the opposite sex as he is in a popular band, good looking, etc. There is one female who I know he has to have a crush or slight infatuation with, who he can’t seem to muster up the courage to talk to but seems to know everything about her and if they are in the same room will stand by her but not say anything to her and sometimes just seems to zone out and we’ll catch him staring yet he never talks about her to us as he would normally about others he is interested in. She seems friendly,smart, and is very pretty although I am not sure I would call her intimidatingly gorgeous or anything like that (maybe to her he is?)He is usually a loud guy and many a time life of the party but if she’s around he hardly talks.
I do know that he has a Venus in Taurus and Mars in Aries from a time when we were all discussing signs (not surprisingly the guys in the room didnt know there was more to it than the normal sun sign my fiancee included) so we looked up those that didnt know theirs and he was one of them. I dont know the woman but would guess she might be a Taurus or Cancer as she has that typical hourglass figure that usually is associated with those signs. The only thing I could think of was that she doesn’t really seem to show any interest in him and maybe that makes him interested in her? I would love to give him some advice as I haven’t really seen him this shy (yeah I know an Aries shy?) ever before but wanted to see if anyone had dealt with something like this?
I definitely think your friend must have a bit of a thing for that woman anonymous. Being an Aries male I am usually also one that has no problem attracting women and taking the initiative, however I have also experienced being unable to think of anything to say to someone I was really interested in. My Venus is also in Taurus and a beautiful Taurus girl who I dated sure made it hard to get to know her. It wasnt really anything she was doing but it was more myself and that I couldnt even really talk to her because all I could think of was that she was the one and how could I get her. There were times when all I could do was watch her as she talked to other people when I thought she didnt know. Feelings of intense jealousy would overcome me for no reason if I saw her talking to other men. I felt she was perfect and could do no wrong, I would listen to her talk and many times felt she was saying things that I would say. The sexual attraction I felt towards her was also unlike anything else I had felt (or have felt since). Having my Venus in her sun sign must’ve played a big role in that I am guessing. There was def. a strong mental and physical connection to say the least.
So your friend’s current interest may very well be a Taurus if his Venus is in Taurus
Unfortunately, she came along before I knew anything about astrology so I am not sure if we had other astrological factors I just started to learn about it through an ex not too long ago. This is one of the best sites I have come across.
haha…I am an Aries sun/mars/venus, gem rising, with cappy moon. I dated a guy just like you Anonymous. A double gem though, with taurus rising and cancer venus, scorp moon. He would do the same stuff…watching, waiting, hanging around, tongue-tied the whole time, for years. Until i finally talked to him and asked him out :o) I had a crush on him as well. We dated a while and sure enough, he kept up the tongue-tied act and i had to ask lots of questions to get him to open up a bit. He’d get jealous too if i did so much as look/talk with another guy. The chemistry was amazing, strong physical/mental/emotional bond, never experienced the same again. Sadly, he couldn’t handle his feelings and broke up with me just as we really started to get closer. Said his feelings for me were scaring him and he didn’t want to get involved. Yet he won’t let go! He still does the stuff from before and asking about me through friends. Have you done this to someone?? anyone experience something like this?
Anonymous with the Aries friend that behaves strangely around a woman you think he may be attracted to.
You can’t ask him?
You don’t have to say”Oh I know you have a crush on her”, LOL, but you might mention he seems oddly quiet around her, more thna quiet even.
I’m sure since you know him and his reactions,that you’ve picke dup on things correctly, but the first thing I actually thought of is that she might ne intimidating, yes, but more in some way he feels uncomfortable about, not in a romantic way.
Btw, I’m a Libra and I have an hour glass figure.
It’s not unusual either, most Libra women have ‘equal’ or graceful curves.
What’s her eyes and face shape like?
Anyway, can you ask him about her in some freindly manner? 🙂
Thanks Proserpine for the feedback and suggestion! My fiance actually asked him once but not too tactfully and he wouldnt talk about her or acknowledge a crush. Although he has no problem attracting women as I said, whoever he goes after he usually gets pretty quickly. As I said, this woman doesnt seem to really pay attention to him.
She could be a Libra but is a little voluptous so I figured she might be a Taurus or Cancer because of this. Her face is sortof roundish/ovalish I think and eyes are sortof dark (I guess maybe like Spanish eyes … large, dark lashes, brown eyes?)
I’m a Sag lady (virgo rising, venus in Sag) in love with an Aries man (Scorpio rising, Venus in Gemini) who also happens to be married. I’ve been trying to break it off for the past year and he sucks me back in with passive agressive guilt-trips. I got sick and tired of the promises and lies and left… AGAIN. This time he didn’t try to worm his way back in. Just disappeared. I don’t know why I’m writing this, just need closure I suppose. People with Venus in Gemini are supposed to have a tendency to always be involved with two or more people at a time, so I guess I’m looking for closure. I find it calculating and kind of disgusting really, nowhere near naive.
Hi Lina, obviously I don’t know this Aries guy, but I have Venus in Gemini. You’re right about the liking to deal with more than one person at the same time. Maybe he’s bored with his wife, and you represented good times, excitement, etc. Boredom can definitely tempt a Venus in Gemini to look elsewhere. Ironically, that low threshold for boredom could mean HE’S the one who’s BORING. I mean, it’s easy to go get someone new when things are getting monotonous, but doesn’t it take some imagination to keep an old relationship fresh?
Opposites are attracting with your Venus in Sag and his Venus in Gemini. He also has Scorpio rising and Aries sun. Both Scorpio and Aries are ruled by Mars (co-ruled in the case of Scorpio). Maybe he feels like all of that excess energy can’t be expressed in his marriage. Either way, I’m not excusing his actions. I’m just trying to give you some possible explanations for his ways. With his Scorp rising, you’re probably right about him being calculating in the way he dealt with having an extramarital affair. Hopefully, understanding his behavior will give you the closure you’re seeking.
my kid wont take no for an answer when he wants a cookie neither
thats just the way kids is
i love my kid
My Aries guy is self-admitedly obsessed with me!! (I’m a Sag) I’ve known him for a little over four years and he tells me all the time that all he does is think of me, and that he is afraid he loves me “too much”. He’s the best 😉 although he’s a liar, breaks everything in our apartment, and makes messes that rival toxic dump sites….he’s just too sexy and pursuasive to say no to!
My Aries boyfriend of a year and a half is quite the bully. He is always twisting around things that i say and putting me on guilt trips. He loves to tell me how selfish and uncompassionate and impatient I am. Selfish? Uncompassionate? Impatient? Are you kidding me? I’ve put up with your ego for a year and a half! Always having to be first, always having to be right, butting in line, etc…being polar opposities has its advantages…but I just can’t take the disrespect and rudeness and bullying and controlling behavior anymore.
When you break up with an Aries it just gets worse! At least in my case! Nothing will unleash a steady stream of voicemails, emails, text messages, univited visits, like dumping an Aries. They love the challenge and will sometimes lie and do anything they think you want to get you back…but then guess what….once the chase is over, same old same old….sigh….
I gotta stand up for the aries here… remember we’re still learning about this relationship stuff. It just doesn’t come easy to us. Relationships have subtle shades of meaning at times and Arians like things simple & cut & dry.
It takes time for us to learn that
A. We can’t always get our way
(A.1 It was probably a good thing we didn’t get our way!)
B. We have to find a way to satisfy our own needs AND our partners needs.
And if we’re pursuing you or ignoring your breaking up hints,
realize we’re simply not ready to let you go. We want to give the r/s our all- especially if we gave up our “philandering” ways for it. It’s liking a kid who has a favorite shirt they LOVE to wear. They’ve outgrown it but no matter what, they still want to wear it! It takes awhile to sink in that it just won’t work.
We eventually will do it, but the biggest fear for an Aries, whether they admit it or not, is that they will end up alone. Despite brashness and bravado, even we take breakups hard. Especially if they aren’t initiated by us!
ari3sfire
That part about the fear of ending up alone, if thats true then theres a little Aries in everyone….I am alone and “being” alone is far easier to deal with once you’ve had a good decade to absorb it 🙂 I think that if you really look deep into your soul and you like who you are, then being alone isn’t that hard to except, also, those alone are not always alone due to their own vices or fault. There is a great deal of luck…Bad luck will get you no matter what your sign 🙂 As far as being brash, do you know how much it hurts when a guy takes the other road? Indiference is the ugliest foe for love…I’d find a bit of brashness a bit refreshing for a change 🙂
I was with an Aries and it is VERY true. He still behaves as if we are together. I am a Sagitarrius woman, with Scorpio, so I am much more stubborn than he. He still argues with me like he is incontrol. I find it hilarious!!! Although, now, I understand that I am wounding his fragile ego, I can not help but to find the humor in his domineering personality. We were a match in heaven, until he started yelling, lecturing to my hypocritically. What was good for the goose, was not good for the gander. That’s when he would threaten breaking up, that I agreed. It was all too dramatic for me. I like a bit of edge, but all the bullshit and reason, not so much. We still chat and he still wants back in, but he’ll have to crawl to get my attention.
SPOT ON ari3sfire BUT PEOPLE DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT UNTILL THEY ARE IN THE POSTION THEMSELVES 🙂
okay this aries guy tried to talk to me one time he was very charming, but i was very shy so i didnt say much. the next time i saw him he asked me if i knew his name, i smiled and shook my head no (but i actually did)and he turned his head and went back to doing what he was doing. But then i told him i was just kidding i knew his name. if i had left it at no would his feelings be hurt, would he feel like i regected him or didnt notice him he. Or would he take it as a challenge and want to persue me more ?? Can an aries man or someone whos delt with them please tell me how they think.
by the way his birthday is april 10, if it matters
My way or the highway? My ex used to accuse me of that LOL I have an Aries moon and the guy Im with now has Mars in Aries, hopefully that doesnt meant chaos later LOL
to ‘Anonymous’ July 21, 2007 at 6:16 am
the girl her friend is infatuated with could well be a sagitarius or any sign can have a hour glass figure though pisces iz also voluptous you really have to look at her moon and venus sign i have a feminine figure and im a with moon in cancer with sun capricorn/aquarius cusp and were so supposed to be skinny or athltic-but thats not always so .
i know of aries men who have strong crushes on sagitarians and capricorns and aquarians.
i think aries woman are more into relationships for the chase. i know for me at least i always want what i think i cant have, then once i get it i usually become bored. but if that person were to leave me, im sure i would become interested again. aries women like to be in control
This may sound harsh, but after dating an aries man for a month, and already going through the question of “is he still interested”, I have discovered the secret: tell them “you really want them, but you have to let them go”. Oh, what a challenge for this upfront soul. If you’ve given them something in a dating situation that they have never experience before, like a positive attitude and no arguing, they’ll come running head first straight into your hands. Aries need that constant challenge when it comes to dating. If they’re interested, they will refuse to let go of the treasure they have discovered, and will immediately go back to the charming creature they met you as. So every time my aries gets out of hand, I will open his eyes to the fact, that he can loose me in a heart beat. Even though I know, I’m not going anywhere, because my feelings for him are too strong to wonder.
Aries dumped me like I never even existed.
I thought those types of break-ups were usually reserved for boyfriends who were physically or mentally abusive. The guys who didnt show they really cared. The guys who put their needs first. The cheaters and liars.
You wouldnt have known that i wasnt any of those from the way she treated me when she didnt want me anymore.
It hurt so fuggin bad inside.
@WGA I’m not sure if the strategy is good or bad, but since we aries have the hardest time letting go and are very scared of prolonged break ups when we are the ones breaking up, we figure that doing it with absolute finality is the best way to go.
And it is true that once we’re over someone, we really are over them. We don’t want to waste your time. It may sound all backwards, but if we really do respect you and don’t have any hard feelings it’s easier for us to portray ourselves as cold hearted and cruel. Anything to save you some pain and end it quickly, because by that point we’re absolutely aware that it won’t work.
I think Aries feel that we’re doing the other person a disservice by dragging it and being wishy washy when we are so sure.
And everyone knows that Aries is direct and blunt and tactless.
I hate to say but what Aries/Taurus said is totally true LOL,
I will not ever date another selfish centered controlling bully ever again…..stalking obsessed and down right crazy……………STRESSED OVER THIS CRAZED PERSON. The best way to get rid of these creatures is to GO FARAWAY OR COURT SYSTEM. Actually both is best. No offense to Aries who dont fall in this catergory.
I am completely astonished by the accuracy of the Airies trait of being completely self-absorbed. Frankly I don’t know how it is possible to have a future with an Airies that won’t lead to a future of frustration and unfulfillment.
After three years of trying to establish a relationship of consistency and unconditionally love, my Airies woman is still as emotionally detached and ego-centric as ever.
On paper, it all just looks like a bad bet ,and the pragmatist in me feels it is just time to let it lay there and let her experience how it feels to be an afterthought.
Talking it out just gives her a window of opportunity to convince me that it’s her right to live her life anyway she pleases, that any lack of fulfillment for me is my problem, and that, “by the way”, there is no reason to end it while she still needs my validation and attention.
The truth is that I can’t really respect someone who is so personally unaware (and unconcerned) for their egocentric ways, who cares nothing for humanity, aside from how they can turn others into a personal network of emotional serfs they can use to stroke their ego and validate their right to be the center of the universe.
I’m tired of being attentive, supportive and compliant only to be taken for granted, with no real hope of a balanced relationship, ever. Life is way too short to continue to orient yourself to an impossible goal.
I want this to be over, and frankly although I’m still in love with her, (and not sure how I’ll ever get over her) the whole thing is just pointless. We can’t “get there” from here. In fact there is no “there” for her aside from constant validation with no emotional investment on her part.
I’m ready to let her receive her validation from the other poor souls who haven’t figured her out yet, though I feel compassion for them and their future inevitable soul-wrenching frustration.
I’m just checking out, totally and permanently.
Let her wonder why.
I honestly couldn’t care less about her need for closure.
There’s an Aries whose been pursuing me for about a year now. Like another poster said I also feel on top of the world when I’m around him. I was convinced he was the best thing in this world and then…..it got….interesting. I’ve been hurt before and so I was taking things slow. This irritated Aries to no end and he tried to “push” me into a relationship. He’d be all sweet and wonderful but then he could say some pretty cruel things to me. It shocked me something awful and the first few times it happened, I didn’t know how to respond. Eventually, I showed him my tongue could be twice as sharp and he retreated. I noticed this is what he’d do every time I disagreed with him or didn’t move in the direction he wanted me too. And then a day later he’s sweet as can be offering me the world. He’s done this too many times. I’m turned off by the behavior, and I refuse to take his calls. I’m kind of disgusted by him now and convinced all of this was some long ruse.
You know what else? Every time I would consider getting close to him and being an item- I’d have dreams of him with multiple women. And whats worse is he can NEVER keep his stories straight about previous exes. I could bring up something he told me and he’d behave as if he had no idea, forgot, didn’t tell me that….blah blah blah. SMH.
@MsRachael
Turning the tables on an Aries, now that is an amazing thought.
You sound like you get it, and have a healthy idea of what a healthy relationship should look like. Can I live vicariously through you? My Aries (former) girlfriend is driving me crazy. She can’t seem to let go, even though she’s had another guy in her life for three years.
Reading the other posts about how Aries will hang on, or try to win you back for their ego’s sake, then “getting bored” and ending it on their terms is just sick, self-absorbed behavior. In my experience, they have no capacity to understand what an emotional torture chamber they create for the other person.
What was God thinking when he created Aries with that part missing? I don’t know why I’m so attracted to such a thoughtless, unfeeling person. I haven’t made much progress in getting over her, as whenever the phone rings, i can’t stop myself from picking up.
I’m trying to date other women, both beautiful, but just getting to know them. My Aries now knows, and she calls all the more, wanting to know if it’s “serious”. Is it just the ego thing, or is she really wondering if she wasted her chance?
@ kurt
it is probably an ego trip… but you are probably better at answering this question
Ok so I have an aries who went on about his business so I let him go only for him to come back and when I say come back I mean come back; then had the nerve to argue with me because I told him I was over it and for him go back to where he came from. I will admit we both said a lot of mean stuff to each other and I guess because I was still hurting because I did have feelings. But my biggest mistake was ever telling him this because he keeps throwing it back in my face, which really pisses me off. But my thinking is, if he didn’t care then why would he keep coming back?
@KC
He probably does care, but not for the reasons you’re hoping for…
In my experience Aries are the most appealing, yet confounding sign ever. They are incapable of empathizing with their victims, only know that they can’t “live without” the validation they provide. None of this type of behavior really means anything in the final analysis, because more than anything else, they will only do enough to keep you coming back. They will never give up their option to do whatever they damn well please, knowing they can use their charm to keep these tertiary relationships nominally sustained, to validate their control, with no true regard for your hear, only their control and emotional security.
I believe they live to play, will never give that up, but will do whatever is necessary (desperately) not to lose someone who has loved them or has supported them in their lives.
I wish I had better news for you, I am dealing with the same Aries issues.
Kurt,
Thanks for the reply, but that’s sad then, because it’s truly selfishness. If that’s the case then he should simply just go about his business then. He said in the beginning he always meets trash for women, but then he meets someone decent and he treats them like crap. I guess there’s just somethings in this life that I will never truly understand. Well Kurt, good luck to you as well with your situation.
@KC
I take no joy in my remarks.
Your description “selfishness” may seem appropriate, but I wonder, because I’m convinced think they don’t really understand what their doing (as this capacity generally doesn’t exist in them). They are only reacting to that raw emotional threat of emotional abandonment (even though we know that it’s exactly what they deserve).
Understanding doesn’t mean it will be easier for you. Your love and emotional investment just isn’t “answered” in a way you recognize as a deep, committed emotional response. The strange part is how we continue to be taken in and hopeful, even in the face of overwhelming evidence of hopelessness.
Does that make any sense?
Kurt
It does make sense, something did happen though a few days ago, I was talking with a friend through texting and the aries. We (me and the aries) had talked a little earlier that day, but I was talking to one of my friends about a personal health matter. I sent her a text, well thinking it was going to her and accidently sent it to him, so now he knows I’m dealing with something which does not affect him. Well I had finally put it together that he got the text instead of her because me and her were talking later that night and I noticed he had sent a text saying, “Man.. right after I had sent the text to her. he hasn’t said anything else in response which he doesn’t need to since it doesn’t concern him, but I tried talking to him and he hasn’t responded. So I don’t know…
@KC
Was the misdirected text really an accident, or a subtle attempt to to create enough drama to precipitate a response?
If it was the latter, it will almost always work against you…
Keep your head, be true to yourself, and stay classy, no matter what!
No it was actually an accident. I did tell him that whatever it is I’m dealing with has nothing to do with him and that I wanted to see him. He asked why and I told him because I said I wanted to start over like we had discussed last week and he said ok. So, I don’t know, I guess I probably need to just give him time now and if he decides he wants to see me then we’ll see each other…
I have Aries Sun/Venus/Mercury and a Leo moon, so I can be pretty fiery – but I must say, if someone doesn’t want me, I’m off to find someone else. In fact, the slightest lack of interest will send me packing without so much as a parting “goodbye.” What? You don’t love me? Well, there’s billions more fish in the (errr, wait, bad analogy, I’m done with fish)… I mean, umm, there’s heaps more fun to be had out there in that great big world, and I’m going to find it! Why waste a single minute with someone who’s already said “no”?
I’m usually the first to strike out on my own at the first hint of a negative answer. Want to take a spontaneous road trip 750 miles away? No? I’ll go myself. Want to start a business? No? Okay, I’ll do that alone, too.
My Aries never-take-no-for-an-answer tendencies are likely tempered by my Mars in complacent Pisces and on the descendant – a quite un-martian place to be. I make a terrible salesperson. I do assert myself in relationships, though I make a conscious effort not to push my agenda. In fact, I have to be very careful not to hand over my power to my partner… always striving for balance. I can definitely be guilty of focusing solely on my own emotional needs once I feel slighted.
As an afterthought, I think that hanging on to a non-relationship is just that Aries inability to fathom that someone doesn’t like us. What?!? You don’t *like* me? LOL 🙂
@Jenevere
I’m not sure I can approach this in a way you will appreciate.
Sometimes (not always) when a man “loses interest” in a female Aries, it’s because he’s emotional spent from enduring her thoughtless, self-absorbed ways.
He may love her just as much as he ever has, but finally comes to realize, deep down, that the relationship is destroying his soul, and ultimately has no real potential to produce a mutually loving relationship.
When all he can view to the horizon is a life of the same, even though his love for that woman burns brightly, his will to endure it dies.
Been there…
@Kurt
“Emotionally spent”? “Destroying his soul”? “…will to endure it dies”?
You sound like a Scorp who’s been burned. A quick check of your profile confirmed it. I can appreciate your point of view, though it seems rather subjective.
Losing interest in someone happens for numerous reasons; lack of synastry contacts between two people is a popular one. A weak composite chart is another. Ultimately, two people fail to hold each other’s attention for a prolonged period.
I would love to see the synastry between you and your Aries. It seems you feel that she has badly wounded you.
Scorpio and Aries just see things so differently. I love to play with Scorpios – they’re intriguing and passionate and beautiful – but once the emotions get involved, unless he has some fire and/or air influences, I feel like I’ve been slimed. Scorpio emotions are sticky, gooey, and difficult to free yourself from. Conversely, a Scorp may feel that he’s been brushed off, ignored, or even used by Aries, if she doesn’t have any water influence in her horoscope and doesn’t feel a need to merge her very soul with another’s (Aries usually need to retain a strong sense of individuality).
“He may love her just as much as he ever has, but finally comes to realize, deep down, that the relationship is destroying his soul…”
I suppose so, if he is a melodramatic Scorpio. 😉
@ Jenevere
One of the most difficult parts of interacting with an Aries is that they routinely invalidate feelings of others.
Yes, I’ve had a long, dreadful experience with a significant Aries.
Her recent assessment that she “needs different men for different needs” is supported by her lifestyle. Just because she desperately wants me to continue to play my role (reassuring her how pretty and clever she is) am I not permitted to redirect my emotional energy to people and social causes that have more potential for development?
The subsequent phone calls, texts etc. are annoying, a transparent effort to get me back into her emotional support network. Of course I still care for her! But it is just bad energy for me to fall into the same old grind again.
Where is it written that I owe her that?
I am an aries woman, and its right on the dot. If i decided not to let go of a relationship…how dare you consider dumping me lol. On a serious note, especially if we think someone is definitely worth it, we will plan and create to get them back. I am not sure if its a good and it turns a bit psychotic ;). I love myself and i just wish i could let go easily with no regret, remorse or thoughts of vengeance.
I’m a Saggy and having big problems with a narcissistic Aries right now. He’s such a jerk when he doesn’t get his way, or is challenged. I would sooner die than to get involved romantically with someone like him. I’m in the process of untangling myself out of his toxic web.
Ladies, beware, this guy pretended to be charming, kind, attentive, etc. We got along great as friends, and I think he wanted more but disguised it at the time.
He put me on a pedestal and hastily pulled me into working for him. Of course he was very impulsive with his work plan and now we’re in a bad work situation that he created. He’s lost control, and I’m getting the blame for his incompetence.
This aries guy was fine when things were fine, but as soon as any issues come up (big, small, or imagined), he is an ASSHOLE.
NOT WORTH IT, I got burned, be careful and don’t let their impulsive nature suck you in before you have a chance to catch your breath and assess the situation. Yes they can be charming, but when it comes to serious issues between you two, it’s always your fault…
I have scorpio sun and I know an aries boy who keeps on pursuing me even though he has a girlfriend already. I like him and he’s showing signs that he likes me too, but he’s already in a relationship so I always avoid him and I talk to other boys when he’s around. But he still find ways to get close to me and show signs of jealousy when I’m talking to other boys. He does this whether or not his girlfriend is around. I don’t want to ruin a relationship but these actions of his are making it harder for me to ignore my feelings for him. I know his girlfriend knows what’s going on but maybe she loves him too much to let him go. I hate how he’s so inconsiderate about other people’s feelings.
Even though i will admit im purposely torturing my current aries by refusing to submit to his conquest and demands of giving him a secont try. I can say that once a aries finally gets it right they are the sweetest assholes you will ever meet. Every aries ive met has spoiled me recklessly. and brags about it afterwards. lol But I truly dont want to give my current aries another try well im kind of scared to do it. I have NEVER met aries that oursues this hard. He has taurus in his venus,pisces in his mercury and leo in his mars. Ans im a cancer with leo almost everywhere in my chart and scorpio in my mars. The scorp in my chart makes me very crue to him out of revenge, but my cruelty seems to keep him in the “chase”. I have tried everything to try to get this aries to give up and move on. But he refuse to stop pursuing me. Its been over a yr of me constantly rejecting him. He said im very mean and he wont stop until i take him back. I called him a psycho and his actions is a bit scary. He loves to take it slow when he meets a woman who wants to be in a relationship with him. He never claimed me in the beginning when we were together everyday for 5 months. So his currnet actions of wanting me back dont add up. I think its his ego bcuz he cant believe a woman rejects his love. idk. But what can i do to get rid of him bcuz im still angry & bitter towards him for rejecting my love at the beginning. so frankly he can kiss my ass…I lied to him and told him im in love with someone else hoping that will push him away. He say he dont care he still will fight for me. Aries are bullies! How dare he think he can force me to be with him. I asked him to plz stop calling and texting everyday month after month. I have blocked him from 3 emails and phone numbers. He keeps creating new emails to get past my security settings..lol I must admit the leo in my chart is flattered but the scorp in my chart dont trust his pursuit. I believe if i take him back he will switch out. He said he wanted to pop up unannouced at my home to give me flowers. But he knew i would scream “stalker” he said. so he laughed and said he changed his mind…lol That is very true, i wouldve did that. bcuz im a tad bit animated. I asked him why wont he stop what is his intentions? I said I dont like or love you anymore. Just go away”. He said, his intentions is to marry me for 30+ yrs and he refuse to lose me again. Bcuz he cant believe i left him so abruptly and never looked back. So my question, is that psycho possessive nature coming form his taurus aspect in his venus combined with his areis sun? Bcuz he is really draining me. Its almost 2 yrs and he has not gave up yet! He just admitted that he dated a girl recently while he was pursuing me but she dumped him bcuz he said he doesnt want a relationship with her. That made me feel like deja vu of what he did to me. I refuse to love that idiot. I wan him to GO AWAY!
Remember…Actions speak louder than words!!!