Learn how to circulate your creative and sexual Mars/Neptune energy, without draining it. Explore your hard and soft aspects between Mars and Neptune to connect to your sacred sexuality. Read More >> 
 
 
 
 
 

Weekly Love Forecast

You’ve been trying to get your life into some kind of smooth forward momentum, only to be delayed by one planetary retrograde after another. Now love goddess Venus gets in on the act. Read More >>

Sun in Aries, Moon in Virgo Compatibility

Both of these signs need to keep moving, but their goals are very different. Can Aries instinct and Virgo intellect co-exist? Read More >>

Podcast

This week, Michelle Suzanne and Jeffrey Kishner talk about Venus Retrograde and the Solar Eclipse in Gemini. Listen Now >>

Credit: ariwasabi via iStockphoto

In Gemini (the sign of duality and information) you can expect some or all of the following: re-visiting relationship choices, messages from or about ex-lovers, and the appearance of overlooked/forgotten information. Read on to discover how Venus retrograde will affect your sign.

Cardinal Signs: Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn

Venus-ruled Libra will experience this transit as an internal re-balancing. Your romantic needs, versus what you give to others, will be examined. Venus in Gemini is about choice, and Libra is about comparison. You may find it difficult to make up your mind during this period, but that’s okay. You’re not supposed to. Once this retrograde is over, you’ll have a much clearer picture of what your love life will look like. Planets at any degree of Libra will be impacted, but those between 7-23 degrees will feel it strongly.

For all the Cardinal signs, May 15 to May 31 will bring a supportive trine between Venus retrograde and Saturn retrograde in Libra (although the trine won’t be exact until July 31). This double retrograde aspect will demand that you tie up loose ends in your love life. Past choices and present consequences (including how you treat, or are treated by, partners) will be on the agenda. Making the correct relationship decision will be obvious as taskmaster Saturn whittles your choices down. Planets between 19-23 degrees of the Cardinal signs will be hit by this aspect.

From June 14 to June 20, Venus will form an awkward inconjunct to Pluto retrograde in Capricorn. An inconjunct demands adjustment between two incompatible energies. And once again, two retrograde planets will saturate this aspect with energy from the past. Watch for a no-compromise showdown between romantic decisions (Venus in Gemini) and power (Pluto). You may be pushed to accommodate someone’s rules or relationship agenda. Or, you may try to force your agenda onto someone else. Whichever scenario occurs, it will be a repeat of past relationship patterns. This time you’ll have to decide if you want to break those patterns. Planets between 8-10 degrees of the Cardinal signs will deal with this aspect.

›› Try our transit reports for a personalized long-term forecast.

June 16 to June 20 will bring a flowing sextile from Venus to Uranus in Aries. This will be a harmonious influence, good news if you have planets around 8 degrees of the Cardinal signs. The changes that Uranus in Aries has been stirring up will open some unexpected relationship doors from the past. But Uranus is about the future. Your goal will be to liberate yourself by taking a fresh look at your relationships, and then taking action (Aries). The sextile is such a gentle influence (it functions as a weak trine), that you might miss it if you haven’t been on track with Uranus’s new agenda!

Fixed Signs: Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius

If you have planets between 7-23 degrees Leo, Venus will sextile them. This will start a gentle re-boot of past relationships. It may be so gentle that you won’t notice it if you’re not paying attention! Sextiles function like weak trines; they are harmonious but need a push to get anything out of them. Pay attention to coincidental meetings or sudden thoughts about an ex whom you haven’t seen for years. Mercury (Gemini’s ruler) will enter your sign on June 25, forming a flirtatious sextile with Venus retrograde. Watch for messages and conversations that quietly ask for your attention. Planets between 0-2 degrees Leo will be affected by this aspect.

Planets between 7-23 degrees Scorpio will be challenged by an inconjunct from Venus. Be prepared to adjust any fixed relationship ideas that are confronted by an ex-lover, fated romantic encounter, or information about a past relationship. You may have to let go of someone (even if they’re just in your head), or ease up on the power plays in a current relationship.

Retrograde periods aren’t always fun, but if you have planets in Aquarius, this one could present some intriguing developments. Venus will form a flowing trine to planets between 7-23 degrees of your sign. Issues with past lovers or relationship decisions may ease into your life. Choices could fall into place, and you’ll see why events unfolded in a certain way. A compelling new romance with a “Haven’t we met before?” quality might appear.

Mutable Signs: Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces

For Gemini, Venus in your sign might result in attracting multiple romantic options. But Venus retrograde can make you think twice about who you’ve attracted. You may feel like going it alone during this transit, so you can process what’s happened so far. Or, you may be reunited with an ex-lover. Whether the relationship is from this life or a previous one, know that there’s unfinished business that needs to wrapped up. If you have planets between 7-23 degrees Gemini, you’ll experience the full impact of this transit.

For all the Mutable signs, Venus square Mars in Virgo (June 1 to June 4) will present some challenging scenarios. Correct actions versus white lies and the pressure to choose can crank up the frustration. Discussions will be key, because Mercury (the planet of communication) rules both Virgo and Gemini. She’ll also unite with Mercury in Gemini on June 1, stirring up conflicting opinions. Talk with your partner, express your desires, and be as specific as possible. Planets between 15-18 degrees of the Mutable signs will be strongly impacted.

Venus will pass over the face of the Sun on June 5. This rare eclipse can trigger a major turning point in your love life. You could end a cycle involving a contentious ex-lover or questionable romantic choices. For some, this could mark the entrance of a major relationship from a past life. The Venus/Sun alignment will occur at 15 degrees Gemini. You’ll feel it most strongly if you have Mutable planets within 1 or 2 degrees of this point.

June 15 to June 27 will feature a painful square from Venus to Chiron (the Wounded Healer) at 9 degrees Pisces, and then Neptune retrograde at 3 degrees Pisces. Romantic lies and disappointments may be sticky and overwhelming. Venus’s retrograde will be finishing up so the energy will be quite intense. You’ll feel pushed to get to the truth (whether you want it or not). Neptune’s romantic illusions and Chiron’s painful revelations will be confronted. Remember that Pisces’ energy includes forgiveness and letting go. Use it to accelerate into the Venus direct period with a clean slate. Mutable planets between 3-9 degrees will be strongly impacted.

Venus retrograde in Gemini will have lessons for all the signs. As she retraces her steps, look at the choices you’ve made in your romantic life. Evaluate, but save the final decisions for when she goes direct.

Are you ready for Venus retrograde in Gemini? Let us know what romantic issues arise for you in comments below.

Whenever a planet goes into retrograde phase, we inevitably turn within for wisdom, and look back for clues. There’s a sense of suspension, as though you can’t move ahead without re-doing something from before. There’s nothing particularly complicated about reflecting (again and again and again within a four-month span), unless you add a cosmically timed refresh and begin anew signal. That’s when it can feel like you’re being stretched in opposing directions. This foot forward and that foot backwards. Is it Life’s way of teaching you how to do the splits? Methinks not, for we’re not particularly effective humans when we’re split.

This Sunday your reboot is triggered by a New Moon Solar Eclipse. Something different and unforeseen appears as you glance in Venus’ rearview mirror. The eclipse falls on the very first degree of Gemini. Guess where Ms. Venus has decided to do her retrograde dance? In Gemini. And guess where magnificent Jupiter intends to set up camp for a year, next month? Gemini again. It’s a little hard to ignore this triple Gemini extravaganza.

Gemini’s energy is all about the discovery of how your mind works (whether you’re born to this tribe or not). By extension, the ideas and words that are formed from your mental activity come under Gemini’s domain. We’re talking Brain. Like its twin lobes, Gemini is represented by twins—occasionally (or permanently?) out of sync.

Enter Venus, the planet that resonates with love. Now she lures you into finding new ways to bridge the gap between your lobes, and your inner twins. No more splitsville. Thinking alone won’t get you there. Taking stock of what situations you love, and with whom you most feel like You—that’s part of the journey for the next six weeks. It’s heart-centered thinking, and it needs to be fused with brain thinking. Not just for a few weeks, for always.

If Sunday’s eclipse intersects with you in a pronounced way, you’ll get a preview of where the next chapter in your book of life can take you. Get into your heart and start writing.

• Tuesday: Venus stations retrograde in Gemini, trine Saturn Retrograde in Libra
• Sunday: New Moon Solar Eclipse at 0 degrees Gemini

You can listen to this 31-minute conversation below.

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Sun in Aries charges forward with spontaneous enthusiasm. He needs perpetual motion; active relationships keep him vital and engaged. His low boredom threshold and high tolerance for risk mean that he’ll push himself (and his partner). Sun in Aries would rather act than think or discuss. Primal impulses fuel him, and higher reasoning shuts down when he becomes angry, impatient or excited.

Moon in Virgo is driven forward by her quest for perfection. But purity of intent and messy relationship issues do not blend well. As a result, Moon in Virgo can be a perpetually dissatisfied partner. She can also be warm and supportive with a lover who shares her interest in self-improvement. Communication is vital for this Mercury-ruled sign; the more comfortable she is, the more she’ll discuss what makes her unhappy. The downside to this can be chronic nagging and tightly-wound emotions.

Moon in Virgo will support Aries’ drive to move forward—until she realizes that he doesn’t investigate what he conquers. Sun in Aries will be encouraged by Virgo’s desire to get things done—until he realizes that her energy is spent on (what he considers) useless details. Aries will quickly become impatient with Virgo’s need to discuss everything. He’ll also be threatened by her constant disapproval. Virgo will feel nervous as Aries brushes her concerns aside, then bewildered when he snaps and tells her to stop nagging. This relationship can rapidly devolve into dust devils of unhappy energy. There won’t be much to hold this couple together, unless they have harmonious contacts between other planets.

View all the Sun-Moon combinations ››

Credit: khorzhevska via iStockphoto

The easiest place to spot orgasm addiction in the birth chart (although I believe this dilemma is rather universal) has to do with the contacts being made between the 1st House/Aries and Mars, and the 12th House/Pisces and Neptune.

Before diving into these controversial waters, I’d like to issue a few qualifiers. One, there is nothing inherently wrong with having orgasms. Two, there is a distinct difference between the repression/suppression of our sexual nature, and learning to withhold from orgasms in a sacred sexual practice. Three, not everyone has issues around orgasms in their relationships (though I believe many people do), and so the ideas I’ll propose in this essay should be considered carefully against the reality of one’s personal relationship history.

The Nature of the 1st House, Aries, and Mars

The 1st house, the sign of Aries, and the planet Mars all relate to the most primitive level of our existence. Aries points to the first moment of birth, the purest fire of our life force, and the big bang of creation. On the physiological level, this trio refers to our vitality: our sense of individual health and strength. On the psychological level, they all point toward our sense of self-hood, our courage, our willpower, and our most primitive sexual/creative drive.

The 1st house/Aries/Mars trifecta is intimately related to romance, relationship, and sexuality. Without these energies we wouldn’t have access to the power and impulse needed to engage intimately with another human being. We wouldn’t have chemistry and spark. We wouldn’t have the desire to create something new. The 1st house, Aries and Mars refer to the big bang, orgasmic energy we need to create anything new in our lives. Without this healthy life force, we literally become ill and diseased. Without this in our relationships we lose the “spark” or the newness of our connection. In short, if we want flaming hot love lives, we need to make sure that these energies are being taken good care of.

The Nature of the 12th House, Pisces, and Neptune

The 12th house, the sign of Pisces, and the planet Neptune all relate to the highest dream of the zodiac: the manifestation of our ideals and the attainment of perfection. Pisces points to the manifestation of heaven on earth: the place where the singular, spiritual realms (the upward- and eastward-moving Piscean fish) become fully integrated within the dualistic, material world (the downward- and westward-moving Piscean fish). The reality of achieving perfection has traditionally been reserved for avatars, saints, ascetics, gurus, and mystics.

If the zodiac story starts with Mars and the creative impulse, then the creative impulse is thought to end, or complete itself, in the attainment of enlightenment or perfection. Without the energies of the 12th house, Pisces, and Neptune, we wouldn’t have any reason or call to create in the first place. Even if heaven or enlightenment is never actually obtained, even if it’s not a “real” possibility, we need ideals and visions (Neptune) to aspire toward with our creative life force (Mars). In romance, we need the ideal of the perfect union and the “happily ever after” to hurtle us forward into a new partner, a new love story, and a new attempt at the ideal state of romantic bliss.

›› Get your customized astrological compatibility report for insight into how the planets play out in your relationships.

The Nature of the Orgasm Addiction Cycle

At the beginning of our relationships, inspired by a vision of the perfect union (Neptune) or the perfect state of sexual bliss (Neptune) we throw ourselves head first (Mars) with great passion right into one another (Mars). The result, in the beginning, is what we call “the honeymoon period.” Conquest and ideals blend immediately and there are great amounts of newness and happiness. If this were the end of the story, we would all be blissed out and in love, and I would not see so many clients whose love lives suffer so greatly. Unfortunately, this honeymoon period ends relatively quickly (for some it lasts longer than others), tensions mount, the passion often fades, tensions rise, and we begin to despair. We wonder, “What happened? Things were going so well! Why does this always happen to me? I must have bad karma!”

One age-old mystical answer—that often gets swept under the rug—suggests that it is our attachment to orgasms during intercourse that keeps us falling in and out of love with new partners.

When we orgasm, we are depleting our life force and vitality. Through ejaculation and the heaving, energetic releases of orgasm we lose life force. The reason we lose life force is very simple: the explosion is designed to create a new life form. For men, especially, habitual orgasms can be incredibly hard on the adrenals and the kidneys. In the art of Chinese medicine and acupuncture, men are encouraged to orgasm at certain spaced out intervals so as not to drain their life force too often, which is thought to create stress and disease in the body. After an orgasm there is a certain period of time that is needed for the body to recover its sexual “charge.” Often, we do not take the time and give ourselves the space to heal and rebuild our sexual energy. In the beginning of our relationships, the newness of the dynamic helps us to recover our sexual charge more quickly. However, as time presses on and familiarity sets in, the negative results of orgasm dependency start showing up.

The Signs of Orgasm Dependency

The first sign of orgasm dependency is irritation or clinginess, in extremes. When our life force is drained repeatedly, without recovery time and without the inclusion of prolonged bonding behavior during intercourse, we become agitated. We can either project this agitation onto our partner, or we can internalize it. Projected, we can only see the most irritating qualities in our partners. Where they were once idyllic and perfect, now they are less attractive and even aggravating. For some people, even the touch of a partner when the life force is drained can bring up strong feelings of resentment and irritation. On the other hand if the depletion of the sexual energy is internalized, we can feel needy, insecure, clingy and jealous.

In my counseling practice I’ve noticed (although it is sometimes the opposite) that women internalize the feeling of depletion whereas men project it. This creates the typical post-sexual exhaustion scenario: man seems distant, irritated, and unattracted while the woman seems clingy, insecure, and possessive. Although the manifestations are very different, they are both symptoms of the depletion of sexual energy in each partner. Oftentimes this dynamic leads to intense fighting, which in turn arouses the passions again and enables another round of vigorous intercourse. However, after time, the compulsive sexual dynamic wears down to the point where the relationship needs something new (pornography, an open door policy, etc.) and, if it’s not found, cheating often happens or the relationship simply ends.

The reason “something new” is needed is because that “something new” is what ignites the conquest drive (Mars) toward the perfect fusion (Neptune) all over again. The problem with all of this is simple. These destructive relationship behaviors demonstrate an addiction to the Mars/Neptune impulse rather than a constructive fusion of their archetypal functions toward healthy ends.

In our relationships, orgasm addiction can be the beginning of the end. When we get fixated on the momentary bliss of orgasm instead of the circulating of affection, touch, breath, and intimacy, we can quickly objectify each other. Instead of building intimacy between two people, we use each other to manifest our ego ideals and then quickly become disenchanted when we find ourselves not really knowing or loving each other, and not having accomplished anything. Such is the nature of the ego who does not know how to serve the higher self!

Traditional sacred sexuality encourages real intimacy instead of just the rush toward orgasm. Couples are encouraged to place more emphasis on the circulating, sharing, and slow/playful exploring of each other’s bodies, minds, and spirits during intercourse. In this kind of lovemaking, the emphasis is placed on bonding rather than building or rushing toward orgasm (and hence the completion and shutting off of the sexual charge). Orgasms may be had occasionally, but primary attention is not placed upon them. Orgasms should be had sparingly, if at all. Some even say that if you’re not planning on creating a life, then don’t orgasm. This is perhaps a more conservative sacred sexual philosophy.

Recently more books are being written that suggest that our fixation on orgasm can be as addicting and potentially health-harming as nicotine and alcohol addiction. When couples engage in orgasmless intercourse, entering each other peacefully and slowly, circulating and exploring intimacy without climax for long periods of time, and then disengaging slowly, intimacy is thought to be built rather than bodies being depleted. Practicing intercourse regularly without orgasm is thought to lead to heightened sexual activity, deeper and subtler levels of intimacy, bio-rhythms merging more fluidly, and the overall reduction of stress.

The Nature of Mars/Neptune Contacts

From the astrological point of view we need to make sure that our creative energy (Mars) is being circulated and taken care of rather than exhausted habitually, if we want to achieve our dreams (Neptune). Aries often lacks the stamina to follow through or the patience to create long-lasting results. If we want to reach our highest ideals (Neptune) in partnership and romance, then we need to learn how to keep our creative energy (Mars) alive and well. Interestingly enough, Mars/Neptune contacts have traditionally referred to sacred sexuality as well as the drastic impulse to lose oneself entirely. Mars/Neptune can refer to martial arts, dance, and tai-chi, as readily as sex and drug addiction.

The nature of Mars/Neptune is that of the first and last sign of the zodiac trying to understand each other. How do we use the most basic, excitable, journey starting creativity (our sex drive/Mars) to make our biggest and longest-lasting dreams come true (Neptune)? The answer: through circulating our creative energies we slowly and patiently build lasting results that will most closely resemble our dreams!

Here is a list of various ways that Mars/Neptune contacts manifest in the natal chart:

Hard Aspects between Mars and Neptune

The conjunction, opposition, and squares between Mars and Neptune all reflect the potential for sacred sexuality to be realized or explored very easily in a relationship. The same angles can denote potential struggle with orgasmic addictions. A wonderful first step for clients who struggle with their sexual impulses, addiction and/or constant relationship failures is to encourage a martial art, dance, breath practice, or yoga. Oftentimes, before we can open to sacred sexuality, we need to learn how to use our life force (Mars) in a more fluid and circulatory way (Neptune).

• Aries ruling the 12th or Pisces ruling the first often plays out like a hard aspect between Mars and Neptune.
• Mars in the 12th or Neptune in the 1st also tend to play out like a hard aspect between Mars and Neptune.

Soft Aspects between Mars and Neptune

Although many astrologers insist that trines and sextiles are “easier” than hard aspects, I’ve observed just the opposite in my practice. Soft aspects are often harder to uncover or address with a client because they are more unconscious and/or more entangled in each other. Trines and sextiles between Mars and Neptune often appear as a family or ancestral connection to sacred sexual practices. At the same time, they can often appear as family or ancestral connections to orgasmic or substance addictions.

On the whole, any aspects being made—hard or soft—show the exact same tendency. While there is an incredible ability to use one’s sexual, creative impulse to create or pursue dreams, there is also a tendency to drain one’s creative energies for quick-fixes and short-lived, explosive results.

Final Thoughts

It’s important for me to share that I am someone who has a natal opposition from Mars to Neptune. Early on in my life, I struggled with sexual and substance addictions until I found my way onto a spiritual path and began practicing yoga, meditation, shamanism, and sacred (orgasmless) sexuality. While these practices have been vital for the health of me and my partnership, I recognize that these ideas are not for everyone.

On a larger scale, I am interested in the idea that the impatient, impulsive, and desirous side of this Mars/Neptune archetype is perhaps in part responsible for the overpopulating of our planet, the destruction of sacred, monogamous behavior, and the increase in orgasmic thinking, advertising, marketing, and indulging in general. I wonder what would happen if instead of staying attached to “quick fixes” and “getting off,” we learned to circulate, hold and share our sexual energies?

Are your Mars/Neptune contacts creating a drain on your sexual and creative energy? Tell us about it in comments below.

Recommended Reading:

• Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Relationships by Marnia Robinson
• Wired for Intimacy: How Pornography Hijacks the Male Brain by William M. Struthers
• The Karezza Method: Magnetation, The Art of Connubial Love (Forgotten Books) by John William Lloyd
• The Pleasure Trap: Mastering the Hidden Force that Undermines Health & Happiness by Douglas Lisle
• The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire by David Deida

Related Posts:

• How You “Do It:” Mars by Zodiac Sign
• The Wheel: Sex and Astrology
• The Astrology of Kink

Flickr photo by herval via Creative Commons license

If you do need to have important conversations now, snail’s pace slow is the way to go. Taurus not only hates to be rushed, but will bullishly put a stop to anything that is proceeding too fast for comfort. The only way to convince this sign to do anything is for them to come to it on their own. As possibly the most stubborn sign in the zodiac, Taurus is an expert at refusing to budge once their mind is made up.

This can mean that conversations that have “agendas” may feel frustrating, as Taurus moves at its own leisurely speed, determined to feel comfortable rather than rushed. Better to back off now and work with the Taurean earth speed than push things too fast.

Though this is a time to go slow, it doesn’t mean that things can’t get done. In fact, practical, task-oriented projects and dreaming up new money-making ideas are a great way to use this transit, as Mercury in Taurus loves to think of ways to make life more secure and comfortable. Planning a garden with your partner or discovering new recipes to cook together are great ways to make the most of this earthy mental energy.

Dating a Cancer can seem like too much work — but if you can crack their hard crab shell, the rewards are well worth your effort. Read More >> 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Weekly Love Forecast

This weekend, do what you need to do if your goals are slightly off-course. The rewards will be huge. Read More >>

Sun in Aries, Moon in Leo Compatibility

The Warrior meets the Lioness. But instead of a Clash of the Titans, this these partners feed each other’s fire. Read More >>

Podcast

This week, Michelle Suzanne and Jeffrey Kishner talk about Mercury in Taurus and Sun conjunct Jupiter. Listen Now >>

The way that I see it: the bigger the hoop, the easier it is to get through it without going all bull in a china shop. More importantly: the bigger the hoop that you clear, the bigger the payoff. Do what you need to do if you’ve come to the realization that your goals are slightly off-course. This is the time to most easily get back on track, perhaps by envisioning a bigger picture than you initially saw when you first established your goals. Everyone has to adapt now and then. However, once you tie up those loose ends, the reward will be huge.

You’ll notice this most especially on Sunday—just in time for Mothers Day in North America. But you don’t need to be a mom to enjoy the cosmic bonanza. Everyone’s going to have something to smile about.

Days like this are few and far between—and fleeting, too. But make no mistake; the goodwill that you engender now is anything but short-lived. You’re laying the groundwork for epic wonderfulness that can last for years. Do something loving for your body, mind and soul—and share the bounty with those you encounter on your path. There’s more than enough for everyone.

• Wednesday: Mercury enters Taurus
• Saturday: Last Quarter Square Moon in Aquarius
• Sunday: Sun conjunct Jupiter

You can listen to this 26-minute conversation below.

Subscribe to this podcast in iTunes.

Download the Stitcher app to your smartphone (Android, Blackberry, Palm Pre, iPhone) and search for “Sasstrology.” You can listen to our latest podcast without having to sync or download. Enter the promo code “astrorocks” at registration for the chance to win a $100 cash card!

Right-click to download