The Taurus Shutdown: It Doesn’t Happen Overnight

At least one Sasstrology visitor has arrived here by googling why a Taurus man would become distant overnight. The short answer is: he wouldn’t. If he’s suddenly giving you the cold shoulder, he’s been unhappy for awhile. Read on for some clues as to why this might happen, and what you might do to prevent it.

First, let’s look at what the Taurus man is all about. He’s ruled by Venus, so he enjoys the sensual pleasures (good food, good sex). But Venus is about more than feeling good; at his core, Taurus represents the Venus archetype of survival. We’re talking back to basics: resources, procreation, security. This is earthy, primal Venus stuff (not the airy, Libra side).

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About Nadia Gilchrist

Nadia Gilchrist offers 15 years of experience in Evolutionary and Traditional astrology. Her writings and personal consultations focus on applying astrology and tarot readings with a clear, practical approach to the real world. Nadia blogs regularly at Ruby Slipper Astrology.
 

Comments

  1. CancerLondonCusp says:

    Dear All,

    My 1st post. Sorry this is long but I am aching in dark deep pain mising a Taurus man who has done exactly the above- changed his feelings suddenly. I would love your advice please on ANY way to encourage him back.

    So, Taurus man (May 1st birthday) pursued me (Cancer) like mad for ages last summer even though I told him I was still nursing a broken heart & was no way ready for love again yet.
    He acted like a charging bull and we eventually got together. He was kind and loving and told me he loved me very soon- in my opinion far too soon. Said he had loved me from afar for two years. I never said it back because I take love seriously and would never lie about those three little words.

    Months dragged on and I have to admit I did not behave well. I was NEVER horrid to him, but I was depressed still over the previous heartbreak.
    So while he was very ‘up’ and wanting us to start building a future together, I was often down and pessimistic which caused rows.
    I wouldn’t meet his friends or family because I felt that would add even more pressure and would be unfair on him. And eventually I broke it off, twice, before Christmas.

    Over xmas I started to see I had made a grave mistake. He was kind & loving and funny and not going to hurt me like those other men before.
    I fell for him and realised that I was very much in love with him. So I made a small approach by text and we started talking again.
    One day we slept together and the very next day he sent me a very hard email saying we should never see each other again.
    Said his mind was made up and he did not trust himself to let go of the past ( ie our previous problems and the fact that I hurt him).

    I then sent him a beautiful handmade Valentine’s card telling him I love him with all my heart and it really touched him.
    He turned up on my doorstep that same night with tears in his eyes. I told him we must not sleep together, only for it to end in a break up the next day. I said I was not strong enough for that. But he gave me hope that we could still work it out and so he stayed over.
    Since then he has grown more and more distant, but sometime peppered with the occasional loving sign, like the old Taurus I used to know last year.
    He carried on throwing me the odd hopeful sign that we would meet again next week and try to work things out, ringing me to talk about his day and telling me he missed me. But then he’d go cold again and say he’s having doubts.

    We were due to meet next week, but I emailed two days ago to say I could not meet unless he actually wanted to, not just because he felt he ought to meet me out of sense of duty.
    And he agreed & said it’s really over now. I told him I’d post him his things, which I did today with a note simply saying to take care of himself and I love him. I want him back so badly. What should I do- total and utter no contact from herein?
    Thanks so much to anyone who replies

  2. I’m a Taurus female and this could easily apply to me as well. Tolerant tolerant tolerant – then completely inaccessible. Seems like I attract those people who want to push me to the edge of sanity.
    Then I’m “insane”.

  3. I’m a Taurus female and this could easily apply to me as well. Tolerant tolerant tolerant – then completely inaccessible. Seems like I attract those people who want to push me to the edge.
    Then I’m “insane”.

  4. Re CancerLondonCusp: I think you self-sabotaged. You mention several times that you used your logic rather than your heart…choices and ultimatums when none were required. Failure to live in the moment and go with the flow. Taurus can be romantic…it sounds to me that you were never a participant in his romance. Sorry.

    On a different note:
    I have several Taurus-Sun friends and I had one long-term relationship with one. I will generalize and say that I have found Taurus to be potentially jealous…this jealousy ruined my relationship when I was being faithful, but Taurus thought not. My Taurus friends have this same tendency and have ended relationships on this fear and thinking that their partner was being duplicitous.

  5. apologize for the double post. dang fone

  6. CancerLondonCusp says:

    Mike, that’s harsh, but I do appreciate your honesty. Maybe it’s a wake up call for me. I was loving and kind towards my Taurus during our relationship, I just didn’t fall in love with him at the same time as him, so the intensity of my feelings never matched his….. until after Christmas and our split. (Yes, caused by me).
    Look, anyone reading who thinks they can help a broken hearted girl…. please just tell me what to do. I’ve sent him back his belongings and now do I just have to go cold turkey? Even if I do, will it even work or is it true that a Taurus never EVER goes backwards? Thanks so much for anyone’s time

  7. excellent overview

  8. Kikibloomismyname says:

    I’m a Taurus female, and I do “the shut down.” I agree, it didn’t happen over night. If I’m constantly addressing an issues with someone I’ve entered a relationship with, and he pays no never mind then I just shut down and that’s basically it for me. How tolerant does one have to be? Compromise is one thing, but you shouldn’t have to tell your lover about something you don’t like over and over, that’s borderline insanity.

  9. @CancerLondonCusp
    Sorry for what you’re going through, but it’s impossible to say what will happen without a thorough analysis of your charts. There are exceptions to every rule, so no one can sit here and say definitively that he’ll never change his mind. But the rule of thumb with Taurus is that once they are set on a course, it’s very difficult for them to change. As for what you can “do”…know that the least effective course of action with Taurus is to try to get them to change their minds. It’s really up to him.

  10. @siobhan
    Yes, this article can absolutely apply to Taurus women as well.
    Attracting those who continually push you to the edge is usually a sign that your chart is set up to facilitate the exploration of those edges (for whatever reason). There’s a message in the patterns of people that anyone attracts, and the way to break the patterns is to look at what you can learn.

  11. @ Kikibloomismyname
    If you’re a typical Taurus, you’re more tolerant than most people.

  12. @Mike,
    The jealousy (which I will agree is a common Taurus trait) goes back to the survival thing. Keeping what you have close by. Circling the wagons. Although if you wanted to split hairs, Scorpio is more jealous while Taurus is possessive.

  13. @mary beth
    Thanks!

  14. Ariesgirl416 says:

    Taurus men are good friends if you give them plenty of attention. They need to be told how smart they are and how good-looking they are. They are terrible mamas boys. I know one who is still living at home with his parents and he’s nearly 39. He has turned out to be a taker and very selfish, b/c his mom won’t allow him to grow up and move out of the house.

  15. As someone who is dating a man with his moon in Taurus, all I have to say is that one needs to be present in their conversations, listen to their instincts, and put in just as much effort as their partner does. The more you try and understand your partner, communicate with them, and respect them, then I don’t think any man, Taurus or not, will get up and leave. Taurus is a survival and security sign, so if you are the type of woman or man who can provide that, then there should be no worries. If you don’t give them what they give you while you’re in the relationship, then don’t come back asking for another chance. You had your chance and pissed it away.

  16. @CancerLondonCusp:

    I’m very sorry you’re going through this, and my heart goes out to you. I had gone through something similar when I was a lot younger, and it’s extremely painful. There are some differences in our experiences, and in my case our signs were in reverse: I’m a Taurus (born on May 1st of all things), and he was a Cancer.

    The thing that sticks out with me more than anything is that he should’ve heeded your words last year when you explained that you were nursing a broken heart and weren’t ready to love again. IMO, he should’ve respected your feelings and given you the time and space you needed to heal. No one, and I mean no one, can heal from a broken heart overnight. It can take months to get over something traumatic like that. In my eyes, he should’ve given you the gift of friendship, spent time with you, help you engage in activities to help you move on, and listened to you while you grieved (we go through the same grieving process as a death when there’s a breakup), all while NOT pressuring you romantically. If you meant that much to him, and if he had the legendary Taurean patience (it sounds like he does), then he could’ve bided his time until you were ready to love again. If his feelings were too strong for friendship, then it would’ve been wise for him to keep his distance until you were ready to move on.

    I say all this because it’s NOT all on you. He contributed as much to your relationship’s demise by pursuing you when he should’ve held back. You both made the mistake of getting into a romantic relationship with each other too soon. I’m not judging you both because we all make that mistake at some point (or at many points) in our lives. We’ve all been there. Unfortunately, hard experiences make the best teachers at times, and even though the lessons learned are painful, we grow and become wiser (hopefully).

    I’m sorry to say that it sounds like he’s made up his mind. Once a Taurus does that, there’s usually no turning back. Or, if we do come back, we have a mental list of conditions that we may not compromise on before we step back into the fire.

    See, he had been extremely hurt throughout the relationship, the relationship was unstable (and boy, do we hate instability of any kind!), and now he’s in survival mode (where you both are concerned). Once we can’t take it anymore and have reached the limits of our tolerance, we shut down, and we shut out those who are causing the pain. We distance ourselves emotionally, mentally and ultimately physically. He can’t trust you won’t hurt him again. However, he needs to understand that he contributed to the situation just as much, if not more. He moved too fast, and in my eyes he needs to learn to truly listen to others, or he’ll go through the same thing again with someone else (and keep going through it until he learns).

    As painful as it is, the best way to handle the situation would be for you to give him the time and distance he needs. That means not initiating contact in any way. It’s very hard, especially when we love and miss someone so much, but it’s what he needs right now. If you need closure before you do this, then maybe you can write him a letter baring your soul. A lot of people would raise their eyebrows or laugh at the words “Taurus” and “soul” in the same sentence, but please believe me when I say that someone truly baring his or her soul means the world to us (at least to this Taurus, anyway). Then, once your bare your soul, give him the time and space he needs to heal. It is now your previous situation in reverse, so to speak.

    Lots of hugs to you, and I wish you the best of luck. I know you’re hurting right now, and I hope things get easier for you soon. I’m sorry if I sound clumsy or preachy – this is my first post here (so there’s some anxiety), and my blunt Sag rising is kicking in. :) Take care, and good luck.

  17. CancerLondonCusp says:

    Lara,

    Please don’t apologize. This has been, for me, the perfect post.
    It felt like advice coming from a friend and somebody very wise.

    You’ve given me a fantastic overview of my situation from an outsider’s perspective. And, moreover, you are the first person who has told me this is not all my fault and that has REALLY helped me to feel a little better.

    I’ve been beating myself up about the whole thing, wishing I could go back in time with my Taurus and be on the same page as him at the same time, wishing I could have been the girl he wanted me to be at the right time.
    I’ve been telling myself I should not have sent him that last email, saying perhaps we should not meet up.

    I keep saying, ‘If Only’ and then we would still be meeting this Saturday (tomorrow).
    I fell like I have blown it.

    But you’ve reminded me that there are two sides to every story.

    I went to my doctor this morning to talk about counseling and to get some sedatives to help me sleep.
    I can be very strong willed when I want to and so now, having laid my heart out for him, here is no way on planet earth I will contact him first.
    If there is any more contact, it will have to come from him.

    I hope, this weekend, that he opens up that parcel of his belongings that I sent him.
    And I hope it makes him think of me.

    If he ever really loved me, I can’t believe love disappears overnight.
    So if his love was real and true, he will come back to me one day.

    And if it was just infatuation, followed by opportunistic sex, then I will never hear from him again and that’s probably for the best.

    Thanks for sending me a virtual hug.
    I really need one right now
    x

  18. CancerLondonCusp says:

    no-perspiration…. a little harsh, perhaps, given my current fragile state of mind.
    But then you are entitled to your opinion and I am asking for it, be it good or bad.

    I appreciate your honesty. I just guess I wish it didn’t ring true.

    I will say this though, in my defence.
    I did not cheat, I did not disrespect him. I listened to his troubles and I had his back when he needed me.
    I was kind and loving and the sxual chemistry etc was great.

    All I did wrong was not love him at the same time.
    That’s my ‘crime’.

  19. CancerLondonCusp says:

    *UPDATE*

    Teeny tiny and possibly insignificant update.

    I know I shouldn’t have looked but I just checked his instagram feed and he has JUST posted a photo of one of the xmas gifts I gave him in that parcel I sent of all his belongings.
    (Remember, I told him in out last ever phone chat that I’d be sending him back his things. These included a bunch of unopened xmas presents).

    Does the mean anything at all?
    I figure he is at home and has finally started opening the parcel and he must have really liked this one particular gift to post a pic of it. It’s only something small and thoughtful, not expensive.
    Surely if he truly truly wanted to shut me out of his life forever, the gifts would mean nothing to him?
    and he most certainly would not post a pic of it right?

    Or am I being a hopeless optimist? OPINIONS?
    Thanks, guys. you have really been here for me

  20. Hi, CancerLondonCusp,

    You’re more than welcome for the hug, and I’m glad the post and virtual hug helped you! :)

    I really do believe you are a strong person, with a strong will. I’m even willing to bet you have a reserve of strength inside of you that you’ll subconsciously call upon when needed. Every Cancer in my life is like that, and it’s amazing to see. People like to say how strong Scorpios and Tauruses are, and we are, but you guys are right up there with us. I think water signs get underestimated a lot because of your sensitivity and your willingness to open your hearts to others. But what a lot of people don’t realize is that opening oneself to others, admitting your feelings and facing them and being sensitive in a world that can be harsh are signs of courage and strength, not weakness. :)

    I think you’re right in not contacting him and by putting the ball in his court. I wish I knew what he meant by putting the picture of his gift on an instagram feed, but I’m sorry to say I don’t.

    I do think you meant something to him. That it was more than opportunistic sex or a mere infatuation. The fact that he wanted you to meet his family and let you deeper into his life meant he wanted to take the relationship further. Unfortunately, I think he’s at a point where he can’t handle it anymore, and he’s probably confused. If his moon squares his sun, he might even be warring with himself. It’s hard to say.

    As hard as it is, I think you did the right thing by not having him come over today. It hurts, but it might’ve hurt you a lot more if he became distant or cold to you again. You both need space to heal, and that is the best gift you’ve given to both of you by calling today off.

    Please try not to beat yourself up over this. I know it’s hard, and it’s a normal thing to do, but it’s not all on you. It never was. He had a hand in all this too. This is true for every relationship that goes bad or breaks up.

    There is nothing logical about grief, including how we feel or how we act at times during the grieving process. However, you will come out of all this wiser and stronger and will learn from both your mistakes.

    The key to helping yourself during this time is by trying to do things that will help you move on. It’s okay to cry and go through all the emotions associated with it – that’s normal, and to deny your feelings and to stop yourself from crying will only make matters worse in the long run. But if there are activities you like or something new you’d like to try, then now might be a good time to dip your toes in the water and give it a shot (or explore the options). Baby steps is the key, though, during this time of loss.

    You’re operating under your own power and energy now, without being influenced by a significant other. On the one hand, it’s scary, and yet it’s liberating too. And now, you can truly go on the road to healing without any pressures from somebody else. I wish you the best of luck, and I think you’ll come out of this alright. Like anything it takes time, but it’ll happen. Just you wait and see! :)

    xxxx

  21. CancerLondonCusp,

    I didn’t mean it to come out as harsh, in fact, I said it with no emotion. Too many times I have come across people who split up and did not see how the relationship ended. A lot of times people are blind to the actions of what went on in the relationship, and they make a story about it. I have definitely been one of those people, but I learned that how I feel about a situation is just how I am choosing to feel… and it’s based off a story in which I put meaning into it. I don’t know if what I’m saying is making sense, but life is easier when you focus on the things you can control and not worry about the things that you can’t. I’m not going to assure you of anything here because I was just commenting on the Taurus post itself, not your story. If anything… just do you. Don’t rely on hopes and wishes, they aren’t controllable.

  22. @CancerLondonCusp

    As i read your post i felt as though someone was telling my story with my taurus. Im a gemini. We’ve been on and off for exactly 3 years, and letting go is just one thing i can not do! It’s something about their bold stable attitudes smh.

    My ex and i rekindle our love which would last for all of 3 months then we argued and broke up. After the break up he explained that he no longer wanted to hear from me and i mouthed the same. We both knew we were just speaking for the moment. Anger took over. So for about 4-5 months we hadnt talked at all. No text small conversations we hadnt even seen eachother. Which was for the better i could even imagine just walking pass him…

    After about 5 months of me ” giving him his space” i texted him to check up on him. We talked like we never missed a beat. We expressed how we missed and still love eachother. Theres just a connection i will never understand. Now im on a train wreck of trying to get him back but he’s unware of course. I cant believe how serious im taking this i even googled how to keep a taurus man. but i love him and i’ll do what i have to to get him back where i had him,

    So yeah girl your not the only one i completely understand : /

  23. CancerLondonCusp says:

    Dear ashhhh

    Thanks for taking the time to let me know there are others out there going through the same pain.
    I’m such a mess right now and hope you are coping better than me.

    Although your situation is far from ideal, it’s nice to know that there are some Taurus men out there who simply need time to digest things before they give a girl a second chance.
    Like you, I’ve read just about every Google search possible on how to Get Back A Taurus etc
    Most are pretty disheartening, telling me that Taurus men never ever change their minds and won’t ever come back. It makes me lose hope and despair.

    I think with your situation, what you ahve is a miracle – a Turus who has come back to you in some small way.
    Play it carfefully and slowly. Have patience with him and let him take the reigns.
    He is a bull, after all, so don’t try to force him into the corner of a field.

    I know it’s hard, because all you really want to do is smother him with your love and let it all out.
    But don’t. Save it.

    I wish you so much love and luck.

    Meanwhile I am continuing with no contact with mine.
    I think he may have already started dating other girls because I have checked his Twitter feed and I get a sense of it. That said, Im a v jealous Cancerian, so maybe I am over-egging it.

    With time, I can see that I must have really hurt my bull by not loving him back when he wanted to be loved.
    I couldn’t help it at the time. I was hurt and had problems in my life so was looking after myself and not putting him and our relationship first.

    I hope and pray every single day that he still has some love for me inside and that he returns.
    I mean, I want to marry this guy and have his babies.
    And I can’t look at another.

    :(

    x

  24. CancerLondonCusp

    The power of love is so breath taking. I know exactly how you feel. Try taking in the advice you gave me. which is extremely healpful because i do just want to smother him with my love. So give your taurus some time. after a month or so approach him. looking your best, just to make casual convo. As if your just seeing how things are. Dont make yourself so available, Let him see the strong bold girl he once dated. As un affectionate as they can be maybe he admired a lil of the space you were giving him when you were grieving over your ex. Show him your strong and not weak for him.

    Only time will tell i promise. Those 5 months i spent without him were so tough but it was greatly needed. Gave him a little view on how life would actually be without me. And then maybe that day will come when you marry him & have his babies :)

  25. All right Taureans, help a Gemini understand! Here’s the situation as briefly as possible….I’ve been flirting with a Taurus since the summer, and it became rather evident that he had a girlfriend or something. I would only hear from him during his work hours, ya know, little things. This went on for months with no action outside of where I know him from, and as a typical Gemini, I gave up. A few weeks ago, he came out of the woodwork again and expressed interest in casual sex. I told him I would think about it and decided that was ok with me. Then I find out he has a girlfriend and lives with her. Finally he showed up at my place where we talked for a while. We began making out and he stopped me, confessing that because of his girlfriend and some scars in the past he couldn’t. He hoped that he and i could maintain our friendship after that incident and I told him that I understood, and that he had more to lose in this than I did.

    Here’s what I don’t get…………..I’m not a fan of his intention to cheat on her, nor his actions with me. I’m not ok with the fact that he flirted for nine months with me only to find out he has a girlfriend. I know I’m gonna sound like a moron, and please forgive me, but I learned so much about this guy that night that draws me to him more. He’s not a habitual cheater and we share a medical condition, one which usually costs me relationships. I do not doubt for one second that he likes me, I know he does…i am confused as to what’s goin on with his girl.

  26. Crazygemini02

    I think you should give him his space. You will not recieve much from him other than sex if you continue to do what your doing. Once he’s done with his girlfriend maybe than you should try to pursue things with him. But i wouldnt advise you to try anything now because it’ll only hurt you in the long run.

  27. SheKnowsitall says:

    Crazygemini02

    I think you should give him his space. You will not recieve much from him other than sex if you continue to do what your doing. Once he’s done with his girlfriend maybe than you should try to pursue things with him. But i wouldnt advise you to try anything now because it’ll only hurt you in the long run.

  28. Hey

    I did give him his space, then things just got interesting. We never did have sex, he got cold feet about everything. I haven’t said a word about that night, nor have I said much at all…..however before it wasn’t unusual not to get a reply now I do. I plan on remaining in the friend zone, And if we end up single together,,awesome. My question was more so what taureans think is going on with this relationship he’s in (based on his sign.) I know that’s generic but I don’t get it

  29. This Gemini girl needs help. I started dating a Taurus last year. Everything thing was fine, or so I thought. The only thing that was suspicious was the fact that he told me he loved me so early. So new years is the last time I saw him, and the last thing he says to me is he loves me and will see me Tuesday. He vanishes, his phone is turned off, I don’t know what to do but to break it off with him, on Facebook I might add. Then in January I find out I’m pregnant with his kid, and I don’t tell him because of my own issues with men. It’s sad to say but in the middle of February I loose the baby. I still don’t tell him, wasn’t planning on it. Then the beginning of April he we start talking again. He wants to come over to get laid, but also informs he that he has been with one person since our breakup. Then I loose it, and text him mean things nobody should ever say to a person, and some other things he wasn’t happy. I was just so mad. Then after I piss him off, I tell him about the baby. I sent him pics of the ultrasounds and he says they are fake. He doesn’t believe me. I proceed to mail him copies of the ultrasounds and the pregnancy test. He doesn’t call or anything. A few weeks later my friend and I went to a bar and he was there for some birthday party. He yells at me across the bar and says don’t ever send him shit like that again. I was so upset and confused. I dont know what to do, I want him to acknowledge the baby, and I want him back too. I even apologized to him about how I sent those texts and all he says is ‘ok, thanks.’ Please help, I don’t know what to do, I still love him.

  30. This Gemini (June 19th) girl needs help. I started dating a Taurus (may 18th) last year. Everything thing was fine, or so I thought. The only thing that was suspicious was the fact that he told me he loved me so early. So new years is the last time I saw him, and the last thing he says to me is he loves me and will see me Tuesday. He vanishes, his phone is turned off, I don’t know what to do but to break it off with him, on Facebook I might add. Then in January I find out I’m pregnant with his kid, and I don’t tell him because of my own issues with men. It’s sad to say but in the middle of February I loose the baby. I still don’t tell him, wasn’t planning on it. Then the beginning of April he we start talking again. He wants to come over to get laid, but also informs he that he has been with one person since our breakup. Then I loose it, and text him mean things nobody should ever say to a person, and some other things he wasn’t happy. I was just so mad. Then after I piss him off, I tell him about the baby. I sent him pics of the ultrasounds and he says they are fake. He doesn’t believe me. I proceed to mail him copies of the ultrasounds and the pregnancy test. He doesn’t call or anything. A few weeks later my friend and I went to a bar and he was there for some birthday party. He yells at me across the bar and says don’t ever send him shit like that again. I was so upset and confused. I dont know what to do, I want him to acknowledge the baby, and I want him back too. I even apologized to him about how I sent those texts and all he says is ‘ok, thanks.’ Please help, I don’t know what to do, I still love him.

  31. Sorry for posting twice phone is acting up

  32. Hi A,

    I was laughing so much I still have tears in my eyes, thanks for that.!!!

    Geminis are real comedians whilst at the same time they have a serious side due to the
    fact that they are “duality personalities”. They somehow manage to present both sides
    of themselves simultaneously by being funny and matter of fact. You cannot help but
    take notice of the delightful and interesting things they have to say.

    This Taurus, astrological, neighbour of yours sounds like a real “CHARACTER” with a lot
    of gumption whom doesn’t hold anything back and is also very funny himself whether he
    intends it or not. Following all that went down about him so quickly jumping into the sack
    with someone else whilst at the same time he is putting you through the ringer of having
    to produce so much evidence of your conceived baby which you lost and it was probably
    for the best by the sounds of it, why are you still so hung up on him.???

    It is unfortunate that you lost the baby and it can be a traumatic experience for a Girl or
    Woman but don’t expect him to acknowledge it or feel what you have experienced since
    he didn’t go through it and let’s face it he is no where near ready of becoming a parent
    or anything else which involves commitment and responsibility at this point in time.

    Don’t stress out about the texts because he deserved them considering his attitude and
    he won’t hold it against you because a true Taurus does not hold on to grudges and past
    wrongs, they are able to rise above it naturally and moving forward as though it never
    happened. They do not dwell or live in the “PAST”.!!!

    Anyway back to you wanting him back and why.? Other then the fact that you still love him
    but the fact is does he love you the same way and does he want to return that is the real
    question here.???

    Tell me how old you Guys are and what your relationship consisted off before this drama
    and why you chose to break it off with him instead of trying to find out what was going on
    first, since you love him and didn’t really want to let go of him.???

    Cheer up and smile, Taurus.

  33. Okay, so I’ve left somethings out. It was basically love at first sight. He was the be that said I love you first, he told me that he wanted to get married, and have another kid in a few years. That took me a little off guard. I didn’t know what to make of it, marriage just seems shady to me. Anyways, I’m 25 and he’s 28. I have a little girl and he has a little boy, they are a year apart, with his son the older of the two.

  34. Oh, and I’ve come to realize that I only want him back because he was the first person I allowed to get close enough to hurt me, and he did a GRAND job of it.

  35. But there is no hope, I sent the man a picture of me in his hoodie making out with another guy. By the way, I made the guy wear another one of ny ex’s hoodies. Then I made a college of three pics, one of me by myself smiling, just so he could see what I was wearing, then one of me kissing that guy, then another where we are kissing a little more with groping. So I don’t think he will ever speak to me again

  36. Hi A,

    Talk about “HITTING BELLOW THE BELT”.!!!

    It appears as though you Guys enjoy playing hard ball and you don’t waste any time
    in rubbing it in, but you are both honest which is better then doing it behind each others
    back and having to come clean, which is worse since you still have to deal with it.

    Did you actually have sex with this impersonator or was it harmless.???

    Who did what first you or him.???

    If he really loves you and you should know that by now, there is still hope because Taurus
    does come back to the one he truly loves and it would take a lot more than something which
    was staged just to get a rise out of him. Or am I wrong.???

  37. ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR.!!!

    Cheers and keep smiling. Taurus.

  38. He did everything first, the only reason I sent those pics was in retaliation to what he did. Actually, it was my friends idea, and no I didn’t sleep with this friend, but I’m not so sure if my Taurus believes me when I say so or not.

  39. A Says:

    I had a ridiculously similar instance with a Virgo a few years back….the big difference is I believe I had miscarriage really early on and never went to the doctor. I never told the Virgo because I legit wasn’t sure and had no proof….and the more I put the cfacts together the more I leaned to it. So I told him and he went ape shit…..he called me a liar and asked for proof. I told him I didn’t have any to give it was six months ago and overbefore it started and he still demanded proof. I told him if there was a next time I’d save the evidence in a petri dish if it made him happy….gross I know…..LOL!

    Anyways, it took him a few months to come to terms with it then he was OK. He and I didn’t ride off into the sunset, he moved on as he said he would…and heck he STILL may think I’m a liar. You my friend have PROOF! I don’t want to make excuses for him but how would you feel if you were a guy and a woman came to you and said “Hey look, this almost happened a few months ago.” I find it my policy to be as up front and honest as possible immediately after my instance.

    Now what I’ve learned about my Taurus situation is that they take a lot longer to do things than any of the signs. As Geminis, that sucks for us. Mine took so long to come out with me I was over him the night he came over. Seriously, time is money baby and we don’t like to waste it.

    I would say really evaluate if you want this guy…..if he hurt you bad once he’s probably going to do it again. He;ll be back though….You’re a gemini they always come back.

  40. I don’t think so, he was very mad. I wish that there was something I could say, I don’t know what it is about him that I just can’t let go. If someone could help me figure that out maybe I could move on.

  41. Hi A,

    Once a Taurus gets under your skin it is very hard to let go and even if you do they
    continue to linger for a very long time and you continue to feel the connection which
    they also feel due to the fact that it is still very much alive since it is not in their nature
    to let go of someone they value and love, and change is anathema to them so I say
    there is still “HOPE”.

    These picks which you sent him are a very clear indication of your “retaliation” and
    something which stands out a mile in my view so he would be someone of low intelligence
    or very narrow minded if he couldn’t figure it out which I doubt but you need to give him
    time to get over this little charade which was concocted purely as a getting back at you
    “JOKE”.

    So the question is do you still want him back because you love him, and want to work this
    out.???

    Or are you now looking at ways which will enable you to move on because as far as you
    are concerned it is over.???

  42. Of coarse I still love him and want to get back together with him, but I don’t think that he will ever want me back. I don’t know if he will ever get over the pics that I sent, he was very mad. So now I’m looking to move on because I just don’t think that he’ll ever want to come back.

  43. Hi A,

    You are being too hard on yourself and you are blowing things out of proportion. What you
    need to do now is rectify the situation by first allowing him the time and space to get mad
    by staying out of harms way because when a Taurus is mad or angry it is always wise to
    clear a path and allow them to vent their anger so they can get it out of their system.

    He will soon come to realise that he contributed to this scenario due to the fact that he was
    the one whom did the dirty deed in the first place and you reacted to it by pulling that stunt
    which was a “FAKE” because you felt “HURT” and “ANGRY”.

    Once the dust settles you need to reach out to him by pointing that out and allowing him to
    “SEE” and “HEAR” and “FEEL” how much you really “LOVE him and VALUE” him.!!!

    When people are hurt and angry they say and do things based on their impulsive defences
    which have not been thought through and are unreasonable but they are reacting to some-
    thing which someone else has caused upon them.

    ACTIONS CAUSE REACTIONS.!!!

    Everyone makes mistakes and it is understandable but as long as the person is willing to
    admit to it and owing up to it you can not hold it against them, and from what I can see so
    far is that you made this mistake by sending him those picks but you had your reasons
    since he is guilty of it himself by jumping in the sack with someone else so soon following
    your break up.

    Men usually resort to those measures because they think this is a quick fix to rejection but
    in actual fact it only causes a deeper problem which has been avoided and not dealt with.

    Think before you answer, say something, act or react is something everyone needs to pay
    close attention to or heed but that is not how the “HUMAN BRAIN WORKS”.!!!

  44. Thanks for the advice. I haven’t had any contact with him since I apologized, which he responded with, “ok, thanks.” I’m not sure if he really accepted my apology or just said it to pacify me so I’d go away. Any thoughts on that one??? Anyways his birthday is coming up, I was thinking I would text him happy birthday, is that a good idea or no?? Or should I just leave it alone???

  45. Okay here goes. Went on a date, first one since the Taurus. It was horrible, it’s not like we didn’t have anything in common because we did. He was nice and everything, but he was also a push over, and kind of fat. Is that bad that I’m even bringing it up? Okay but then we when we are going to leave he kisses me. I’m not bragging here, but I’m a good kisser. Guys it was so bad, I wanted to ask him if he was joking or not. You know how there are some guys when they kiss you wonder if they are actually trying to eat your face, or there are the guys who use no tongue ever, but this guy just stuck his tongue in there and didn’t move it. I actually had to turn my head and push him off me to make it stop. To get to the point that was so bad that it made me start crying because it made me think about my Taurus and that I might not ever kiss him again (best kisser ever BTW) and I’m stuck kissing these useless fools. I’m effing hopeless!

  46. Hi A,

    Comparison shopping for human beings can be very tough especially when it is someone
    whom you were or are still in love with unless the next one has all the requirements of the
    previous one and then some. But sometimes even that’s not enough when his memory is
    still alive in your mind and in your heart.

    You are not hopeless and you shouldn’t have to settle for less if you can salvage something
    which was up to your standards and there is still hope and a chance of getting it back. So in
    regard to your previous post I was going to say that following the “COOLING OFF PERIOD”
    you need to find an opportunity which will enable you to reconnect and start afresh.

    You said that when you apologised he responded with “O.K. thanks”. It sounds as though he
    has taken it in and he is coming to terms with how you reacted which is a good sign otherwise
    he would have hung up or would have said something nasty and hurtful which would have
    meant that he was done with you, but this indicates that this is not the case.

    So his birthday is coming up and that will be a good opportunity to wish him well and also
    include a song or something visual which is “ROMANTIC” and it says and reminds him
    about the “TWO of YOU”. A card where you can write something “SPECIAL” is also a good
    idea so you are on the right track about his birthday and I think it is a very good idea of yours.

    If he still has his belongings at your place such as his infamous hoodies for example or anything
    else, you can use this opportunity for him to come over to collect them and you will be able to
    see him in person and “BREAK the ICE”. I am sure you will know how to handle the situation
    when the occasion arises, but go with the birthday wishes first and take it from there.???

    Hopefully you will get a good and favourable response and work things out.???

    If not at least you will have tried by giving it your all and you will have “NO REGRETS”.!!!

  47. Andrea says:

    I’m afraid your wasting your time with this Taurus male. I have been in and out of love with bulls all my life and know from all that you have said, nothing you do will work. I met my first bull i was 17, it lasted 3 years because he was the overpowering bully type. Then i met an Ox and had two kids to him and that lasted till i was 28. Then i met the love of my life at 29 (i am now 42) who is a Taurus/Ox: yes a double bull. He is the typical Taurus gentleman plus all those wonderful positive Taurus traits. He also has all the typical Taurus negative traits which drive this Aquarian sun, sag moon up the wall! But for all those faults he treats me like his queen. The reason he does is because i’m a loving challenge. Taurus men can’t stand woman who they can’t be proud of. He wants the original eve, by that i don’t mean she needs to be a virgin, just a real woman who respects herself, is confident, intelligent and can take care of herself and family. The perfect woman for him is the sweet girl who can cook and acts nice and kind by daylight and a vamp in the bedroom. Never let your Taurus man leave the house hungry or horny! The Taurus male needs to chase the girl of his dreams. He needs to know she is incredibly hard to get, that way he knows he can trust her. A girl who gives in too early will never be commitment material. Never, ever put him down in front of his friends because he will never forgive you and will never forget it. this will stew in his brain and can contribute to him leaving you. He is the typical mans man! Seriously i could go on and on what i know about these guys. The reason i’m writing is because mine left me in 2010. I had turned into a nag and i had changed into something he didn’t like anymore. It was all my fault and i accept that. I even turned a bit aggressive and loud, something a Taurus man detests. If he wanted a sparing partner, and someone who is loud and aggressive, he would sleep with men. I was the love of his life before i become this person. HE was proud of me and talked about me all the time. He left and ended up with another girl for 6 months and left her because he hated himself for giving up on our love. This was October 2010 and at New year 2010, he knocked on my door disgusted with himself. A true Taurean would never leave for another woman, but pushed and left to stew in his head, they become so consumed with having to leave, they would do anything to get away. He slept with her while he was with me and knew then he had to go. He had committed himself to me and this was the only way he was going to go by destroying everything he once loved. We have now been back together since then. I never contacted him, chased him, he learned i was getting on with my life and he was proud of me. Once he realized what a total fool he was he came back and begged my forgiveness. Seeing as he is a true Taurus and a very rare loving man, who in this day and age is hard to find, i gave him a chance. We both needing to learn each others worth again. I am now his perfect little princess and strong independent queen and he is as always is my perfect gent and sexy, loving partner. Good luck ladies in your love life and if you want to keep or get with a Taurus male, i have given you lts of pointers, because once these guys get under your skin, nothing and i mean no man after him will do.

  48. So I texted my Taurus and told him happy birthday and that I hoped he had a good one. He didn’t say anything back :( I’m sick of waiting around for him to come to his senses or whatever. I want him back and I’m getting very impatient. I just don’t know, if he waits to much longer I’m afraid I will have moved on. I mean I can’t wait around forever

  49. Hi A

    I thought we had lost you my Girl it’s good to see you back even though this issue has
    not been resolved but there is always hope providing you are “PATIENT” and give this
    Taurus Man of yours a little more time to get back into the flow and swing of things which
    can be a little daunting following the events which have occurred and for a Male it can be
    very hard to swallow when his beloved was flashing photos with another Guy regardless
    if it was harmless or not.???

    They take it very personally and tend to hold on to it for as long as it takes for them to get
    over it and come back with renewed and rejuvenised inspirations toward the one whom
    resides in their mind, heart and soul.!!!

    Do not be rash and go to the “EXTREME” of hooking up with someone else just because
    he did not respond favourably to your birthday wishes. He will come around if you wait and
    again try to reach him by being loving and using your sense of humour to coax him back
    where you had that loving feeling and so much else in your relationship which must be worth
    so much more than just something which can so easily be set aside and for what.???

    REMIND HIM OF YOUR LOVE AND THE GOOD TIMES WHICH YOU BOTH SHARED.!!!

    TELL HIM THAT THERE IS NO ONE ELSE WHOM CAN MAKE YOUR HEART BEAT THE
    WAY THAT HE DOES AND YOUR MEMMORIES ARE ONLY OF THE TWO OF YOU.!!!

  50. A you really need to read what i wrote. If he hasn’t responded, it’s because he doesn’t want to. He has made up his mind you are not commitment material. That’s how these guys work.

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