Synastry Basics: Who Is Really “Right” For You?

I remember back in High School (and later), when I first had an interest in astrology, turning straight to the appropriate section in Dolly/ Cleo/ Cosmo to find out whether my latest crush was compatible with my Pisces self. If only it were that easy! Back in those days I didn’t know that there was more to me than just being a Pisces. But then again, that is the case with most of us.

Sun Sign Compatibility

Sure there is some pretty obvious sun sign compatibility—I know so many Scorpio-Pisces matches, for example (I believe that Pisces is possibly the only sign that can lighten the Scorpio load and Scorpio is the only sign that can truly understand the emotional currents of the fish). But that isn’t to say that many other not so obvious matches won’t be successful.

We bring our Sun signs to every relationship we are in, but there is so much more to compatibility than that. We also bring our emotional needs (Moon), relating patterns (Venus), the way we think and communicate (Mercury), and our sex drives (Mars). Saturn helps us with commitment and responsibility whilst Jupiter can show our risk adversity.

“On Paper” Matches Versus Real-Life Examples

As an example, my parents are an Aquarius-Scorpio marriage that has (so far) lasted 47 years, but on paper should have lasted 47 minutes—Aquarius being the most emotionally detached of the signs and Scorpio requiring complete emotional merging at a soul level. Yet it has worked for them.

Two of our closest friends are a Cancer-Sagittarius match—a match that, on paper, shouldn’t work. But it has worked … for 25 years. And not in a “we’ll stay together forever for the kids’ sake” way, but in a “we really belong together” way!

Relationship Astrology

We bring our charts to each relationship. None of these elements is more important than the other, but they all work together to form who we are and what we need from a relationship—whether it be with a significant other, a friend, a business colleague or … whatever.

In relationship astrology we look at:

  • What each individual needs from the relationship
  • What each individual can bring to the relationship
  • How the charts interact with each other

We look at the synastry of the relationship.

›› Astrological compatibility reports can offer insight into how the planets play out in your relationships.

Some couples need full compatibility, some couples need some tension or discordant connections, some couples need the full-on difference thing. Some couples are together for the kids, for the security, for the companionship or for the sex … and will last as long as each of these motivators stay on the table. And there is nothing wrong with that.

I don’t want to get into the debate around the relevance of marriage or whether there is any such thing as a soul-mate or one person who is right for you or past life connections or love at first sight. Love is what it is.

Where to Look in Your Charts and What to Look For

Each astrologer has their own method of looking at relationships. This is mine.

  • Check out the basic Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars compatibility on an elemental basis.
  • Look at each persons’ chart to see what they need in a relationship:
    • Check out the 7th house, the 7th house ruler and any planets in the 7th
    • Look at Venus—the sign, the house, the aspects
    • Look at Mars—the sign, the house, the aspects
  • Check out the aspects person A’s chart makes to person B’s
    • Personal planets A to personal planets B and vice versa
    • Personal planets A to Jupiter and Saturn B and vice versa
    • Personal planets A to Outer Planets B and vice versa
    • Where personal planets are: the Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars and the outer planets, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto
  • Look at where the planets fall in each chart, e.g. what house does B’s Sun fall into in A’s chart?

To take it a couple of steps further you can also look at the Composite Chart for the relationship: What do the charts look like when combined?

Love is complicated: we all know that! Synastry is a guide that can help you to make sense of your relationships. Use this tool to identify the people who are right for you, assess your current relationships, and uncover clues to help you to make your relationships work.

What do you see when you compare charts? Let us know in comments below.

This post is republished by permission of the author and originally appeared at Jo Tracey Astrology.

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About Jo Tracey

Jo Tracey is a Sydney based Astrologer, Blogger and Change/Project Manager — in no particular order. Although overloaded with 1st house Pisces planets, Jo’s 8th house Mars in Scorpio is tempted by the occasional excursion into the “dark side” of the zodiac. Jo can be contacted at jo@jotracey.com.au.

Comments

  1. I would be curious to read an article about synastry versus/complementing composite charts. Its a bit easier to understand a harmonious synastry against a rough composite because you could imagine that external circumstances might present challenges, but the chemistry between the two people could potentially weather the trials (or not).

    However, I have wondered- if the synastry between two people is rough with some stressful aspects, but the composite chart reveals a harmonious and growing relationship- then what does this mean???
    I am curious to understand what this means.

  2. My boyfriend and I have been together 6 months, he is a cancer and so am I. he is 6/22/72 and I am 6/28/73. His moon is Scorp, mine is gemini, his venus is gemini mine is cancer, his mars is Cancer and my mars is Aries. finally his mercury is Cancer and my mercury is Leo. We thus far seem to get along pretty well.

  3. Hi !
    In one synastry me + a guy i could have been with, my mars ans sun are alone, NO aspects at all.
    And in another comparison chart of a friend + the girl he’s with, his Sun and Venus have NO aspects either.
    What does it means, when planets are alone in synastry, aspecting no planets of the partner?
    Could we say, the item this planets deal with are just not stimulated?
    ( sorry for mistakes of language, i’m not english speaker)

    Have a nice day 🙂

  4. Great post – agree with you completely, want to add also that some of the most conventionally unworkable aspects can turn out to be quite the glue in relationships, such as Saturn-Sun, Saturn-Mars!

  5. As a famous astrologer said, the stars impel, they don’t compel. My grandparents had 55 years together despite charts that said it shouldn’t work, because they worked hard at it. Meanwhile, a man in my past where it should have been an excellent relationship, intentionally threw it all away. For some reason that requires a lot of psych counseling to understand, he purposely set out to sabotage what would have been the best relationship of his life.

    I use Halloran software, which breaks everything down to numbers, a percentage of compatible/incompatible as well as a total. Some years ago, I was looking at two men, one with a high percentage and low total, and one with a lower percentage but the total score was higher than any other man. I asked for help in deciding which was the better relationship, and was told it depended whether I wanted the smoothness of the higher percentage or the connectedness of the higher total score. There is no right answer; some people want no discord whatsoever, others think the occasional spat adds spice to life.

  6. Has anyone heard of two people drawn together sharing a conjunct Yod pattern where all three triangular points conjunct each other?

    I am guessing this is extremely rare, and trying to find out the significance of this. Anyone know?

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