You meet a new love interest. Fortunately, they’re open-minded when you ask them for their birth information. Data in hand, you go to an astrologer or pore over the synastry contacts yourself. There are definitely a few aspects that point to a significant relationship developing, but there are also a few aspects—classic examples of what to look for in relationship synastry—that although powerful enough to pull two people together, are not adequate by themselves for the relationship to develop: planetary overlays to the Seventh House, and contacts to the Nodes.
These may feel like sure things, but It’s always a good idea to look at their flip side. I believe this discourages people from seizing onto one or two aspects and making a declaration about the entire relationship.
Planetary Overlays to the Seventh House
The Seventh House is considered to be the house of marriage. If someone’s planets land there, it must mean they’re your future partner, right? Actually, no. The Seventh House represents projected ideals about a partner. In addition, although house overlays are felt by both people, it’s the “house” person who views the “planet” person as partner. For example, let’s say Kelly’s Venus falls in Brad’s Seventh House. Kelly’s way of relating to another person fits Brad’s partnership ideals. He thinks that she’s exactly what he’s looking for in a spouse. Kelly will be aware of Brad’s feelings, and will definitely react to them. How she reacts is decided by his impact on her chart.
Let’s put Brad’s planets in Kelly’s Tenth (career), Eleventh (friends) and Third (communication) Houses. Other planetary contacts may indicate attraction, but these house overlays are platonic. Chances are that Kelly will view Brad as a friend who she can talk to and who has an impact on her career. This doesn’t mean that Eleventh House overlays will always be romance dealbreakers. With other romantic/sexual contacts between them, Kelly could view Brad as a friend and lover, simultaneously. My point is that the impact on each person’s chart has to put them on the same page.
Contacts to the Nodes
The North and South lunar Nodes are karmic signposts in the natal chart. The South Node represents past lives and current behavior with which you are comfortable. The North Node represents your future: the lessons you need to learn in order to move forward, or evolve.
Contacts from one person’s planet(s) to the other’s South Node strongly indicate a past life involvement. These are the people you just met but feel like you’ve known forever. Often this connection results in the relationship continuing in this life because it indicates unfinished business. However, sometimes nothing develops.
Matt’s Mars is conjunct Carol’s South Node. Definitely a past life contact, and they both feel the pull (Carol will feel the impact more strongly because it’s her South Node that’s being activated). The pull will probably feel sexual, but it may make Carol uneasy. Being around Matt puts her on edge, so she pulls away. What happened?
Past life relationships often involve unpleasant scenarios. If everything was rosy, there would be no unfinished business to deal with in this life. Mars can symbolize violence, so—depending on the rest of their charts—the lingering echo of this is disturbing enough for Carol to say, “forget it.” It’s possible that they were forcibly separated by war, or that one of them died suddenly. Please note that someone’s Mars conjunct your South Node does not always symbolize violence. But it’s a good bet that some intense, jarring event occurred.
Let’s re-do their synastry and say that Matt’s Venus is conjunct Carol’s South Node instead. While Venus conjunct the South Node is a strong indicator of a past life romance, how the Node person reacts depends on where they are in this life. Once again, Matt and Carol feel the magnetic pull towards one another, but maybe Carol’s having some issues with her South Node. In her past life she might have been a slave, and in this life she’s really working on empowering herself by dealing with those lingering feelings of victimization. She meets Matt and, without even getting seriously involved, feels her low self-esteem issues getting stirred up. She might get involved with him anyway so that they can finish their story. But she could just as easily pull away because she really doesn’t like who she becomes when she’s around Matt.
So if South Node contacts can bring up unpleasant reminders, what about North Node contacts? Actually, North Node contacts can be even trickier, because they indicate someone who has come into your life to help you evolve—and this usually includes some discomfort and/or fear. Benny’s Sun is conjunct Alice’s North Node. Alice’s North Node is in Pisces, so in this life she really needs to work on letting go and dropping her boundaries. This is a very simplistic description of North Node in Pisces, and I’m not taking the house position into account, but you get the picture. Benny tries to get close to Alice. He’s all about opening up and sharing, and frankly he scares the crap out of her. She’s just not ready to go there. North Node contacts represent behavior that feels uncomfortable because it’s new. If you’re ready to move forward, then here’s a relationship that will impact the rest of your life. But if you don’t feel the time is right, then someone pushing you forward may not be welcome.
In summary, these synastry contacts are quite potent and can pull two people together. But you really need to look at the whole package. What does each person’s chart say regarding their capacity for relationships? Do they even want one? What are all the planetary aspects and house overlays between them? What sort of transits are they getting hit by right now? It sounds complicated and nuanced, but that’s what makes astrology so effective.