Neptune in the Seventh House: The Cinderella Complex

In the movie Pretty Woman — the modern Cinderella story — business mogul Edward tries to strike up a deal with prostitute Vivian to keep seeing her when he comes to town. She turns him down, telling him he isn’t offering enough. Like a true businessman, he continues to negotiate, asking her what she wants. She replies, “I want the fairy tale.” When Edward doesn’t provide it, Vivian leaves with a tear in her eye, but knows she’s doing the right thing. She, a career hooker, wouldn’t cheapen the love she feels for this man by succumbing to the lure of mere dollar and cents. Despite the divide in professions, education and socio-economic class, Vivian feels there should be no less between them than Edward offering her the glass slipper and making her his princess. Through the Neptunian lens of the movies, we have the perfect example of how Neptune operates in the Seventh House of Partnerships.

The native with Neptune in the Seventh House has high ideals and high expectations when it comes to partnerships. Love is the grand expression of true, breathtaking romance. The object of the native’s affection is royalty, regardless of her friends or family’s opinions on the matter. In fact, it doesn’t matter at all if her lover is an actual toad. With a kiss, Neptune performs his most profound magic, and all is as it should be.

Or is it? Neptunian waters are tricky to navigate. Beneath the placid beauty of ocean waters lapping onto a sandy beach is a whole down-and-dirty ecosystem of predators and prey. Unless the Seventh House Neptune native is fearlessly honest regarding what is real and what is an expression of her desires, reality — when it does hit –- is not just a slap in the face. It is a sledgehammer.

Heather LocklearCelebrities with broken hearts and relationships — sporting Seventh House Neptune — litter Hollywood Boulevard. One such celebrity is Heather Locklear [view chart at Astro-DataBank]. Married to and then divorced from cheating-hearts rock star Tommy Lee, she soon took up with troubled rock star Richie Sambora. What did she think was going to be different? Did she not get enough of the rock star lifestyle the first go ‘round? And why did she marry against her squeaky-clean “girl next door” image not once, but twice? A natural born Libra, with her Sun in the Seventh House, she has a driving need to be in relationship, even with a restless Aries Moon. But it is that Neptune conjunct her Mars and Mercury in Libra in the Seventh House that glossed over the issues and whispered in her ear, “This time it will be different.”

The exception that nearly proves the rule is Paul Newman, whose death-do-us-part marriage to Joanne Woodward is the stuff of Hollywood legend — except that their long-term union was built on his extra-marital affair with her, leading to the breakup of his first marriage. Hardly the stuff we would expect from a knight in shining armor.

Both these cases illustrate the need for natives with Neptune in the Seventh House to be swept away in a grand, all-consuming romance. Sense and reason –- as well as duties and responsibilities –- take a back seat to this need. In Pretty Woman, Edward and Vivian, from all outside appearances, would have a long row to hoe to a make their union work for the long term. And one really wonders how Cinderella and her Prince really did live “happily ever after,” with his overindulgent parents and her interfering stepmother. But these two stories are the work of fiction. The challenge for the native with Neptune in the Seventh House is to discern reality from fiction in their relationships.

Image Credit: Flickr/Alan Light

About the Author

Beth TurnageBeth Turnage is a professional astrologer with over twenty years experience counseling clients in career and relationship issues. She writes an astrology column for a weekly newspaper along the Connecticut shoreline and blogs about astrology at Astrology Media Press.

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About Beth Turnage

Beth Turnage is a professional astrologer with over twenty years experience counseling clients in career and relationship issues. She writes an astrology column for a weekly newspaper along the Connecticut shoreline and blogs about astrology at Astrology Media Press.

Comments

  1. Goodness. I was watching “Overboard” the other night with a Pisces friend, and it was another horrifying Neptune story. Basically, this socialite girl fell from her yet, does not remember her identity. This “hunk” saw her on TV, decided to go to the police to retrieve her, claiming that she was his “wife.” After numerous claims of no I’m not married, no he’s not my husband, they made her feel shameful about it and wrapped her in potato sack, and ridicule her for not knowing how to make dinner. When she saw the 4 kids the dude has…”Those kids aren’t mine,” she said. and they totally tricked her. It was a total kidnapping story, but somehow she has sex with him and just accepted her nonvolunteering duties, and now it’s a “romantic comedy.”

    Neptune?

    Come to think about it, it also seems like a battle between Venus and Moon (Madonna/Whore complex). Obviously punishing venus?

    Neptune rules sacrifice. Do you think Neptune is also tied to punishment?

  2. yatch*

  3. Oh how true what a wonderful article. Thank you

  4. I have a Pisces Descendant, and I am so not looking forward to transiting Neptune in Pisces going through my 7th. I need to stock up on a fog horn, fog lights, and other navigation tools. Maybe I’ll totally luck out and experience 14 years of relationship bliss (crossing fingers).

  5. May–Neptune is tied to punishment, from the pain of self-sacrifice and self-punishment. All sorts of things fall in this category, like falling in love with a drug addict and then wondering why things aren’t going well. Then there is the self deception, a special kind of pain, and the brutal realization that no matter what you do, the result is not going to change. Ouch!

    I was thinking of Overboard when I was writing this, but two movie metaphors are bit much.

    Gracey–Thanks!!!

    Michelle–When my first husband had Neptune crossing his twelfth house Sun, it was a like living in Disneyland, without the fun rides. Wishing an absolute Prince for you on this transit!

  6. @Beth
    While Neptune Pisces will be transiting my 7th it will also be opposing my boyfriend’s Virgo stellium (Venus-Pluto-Uranus-Sun) in the 8th. Somehow I hope that Neptune being in its own sign will give it very clear spiritual/idealistic expression rather than murky, deceptive expression.

  7. Wow. Thank you for this wonderful article. I have Neptune in the 7th house and my past relationships are horror stories of this placement. For me, the question was, was I looking for someone to save, or was I looking for a Savior? Both, I think. My worst relationship’s composite chart was littered with Neptune squares. Friends and family warned me repeatedly of his treachery, yet I wouldn’t listen. He was going to save me, make me whole, and I was going to fix him and make him a better person. Years later, I’m still fixing the pieces of my broken heart.

    I’m in a new relationship now–not quite so new, as it’s been going on for over year–and I’ve gone into this one with eyes wide open, not so keen on looking to be saved or to “fix” the one I’m with. It’s not easy to fight those tendencies at times, but in the end, I want this relationship to be one of honesty and acceptance of the “real” person I’m with, and not based on some romantic fantasy.

  8. @Michelle–Living with a Moon in Pisces I can say that Neptunian influences can be subtly deceptive. You think you know what is happening until Reality knocks you up side the head!

    @Courtney–Thank you. Wishing you a yours many happy years.

  9. If a woman with Moon in Pisces pair up with a man who has Neptune in 7th house, who will expect much in the relationship? And who has the highest tendency to leave when the relationship is in trouble, the Piscean Moon woman or the man?

  10. I’m not sure there is a good answer to that one. Whether or not someone will leave is determined by other factors in the chart. If Uranus is not making aspects to the Sun, Moon, or Venus, than it is unlikely that a person will leave the marriage willingly despite the problems in it.

    Anyone with a significant Neptune influence, either with a planet in Pisces, or a strong Neptune placement tend to have expectations that are slightly out of line of reality. That is the nature of Neptune.

  11. i have neptune 7th house in sagitarius an i dont think im anywhere as ‘hopeful’ as described though i do in the past gotten very easily disappointing in relationships i used to be a very hpefiul evne very naive person .i am no longer naive and am capable of apprraocing partnerships and life itself quite coldly.
    as for heather locklear and paul newman both are said to have had drug and alchol problems at some point .very neprtune 7th house-me thinks.

    (though i am quite drunk on wine as i write this!!!)

  12. Neptune dream says:

    Hello,

    I have Neptune conjunct my descedant and intil now i was in relationships with wrong reson. I wanted so bad to be needed and i found out that this has to do with Co-dependency problem. People with codependency often form or maintain relationships that are one-sided, emotionally destructive and/or abusive.
    They have good intentions. They try to take care of a person who is experiencing difficulty, but the caretaking becomes compulsive and defeating. Co-dependents often take on a martyr’s role and become “benefactors” to an individual in need. A wife may cover for her alcoholic husband.. ect

    Typical for an strong Neptune in chart (Neptune in 7th house, Moon in Pieces..)

  13. Kate,

    I personally have problems with labeling this dynamic as “co-dependant” as if someone is using a “bad love’ relationship as some sort of drug, though if it helps you to label it so, who am I to say?

    I think what happens, especially if you are heavily influenced by Neptune, is that Spirit has a desire to help and does so even if it is not in the person’s best physical interest. However, we are all a combination of spirit, intellect and the physical. It is up to the self that lives in this personality to balance the needs of spirit, intellect and the physical body. The lesson for the Neptune “challenged” is to learn how to give while not giving away what it is you need to be healthy, sane and whole.

  14. Hey Beth,

    It’s funny that I am just seeing this article and I have Neptune in my SR seventh, on top of having a very strong natal Neptune. I jokingly tell people that I have a condo on Fantasy Island and used to live there full time, but now I just vacation there. Looks like I will need to be on my guard this year to make certain that I don’t wake up one day and find that I have mooved back.

  15. Neptune dream says:

    Thanks Beth,

    I think you are right. We should not label strong Neptune as co-dependency because it’s not always indication of relationships that are one-sided, emotionally destructive and/or abusive..
    Only if you have experience that kind of relationships I’m still trying to found out the way HOW to balance the needs of spirit, intellect and the physical body? and to give while not giving away everything.Is there any therapy for -;)
    My Neptune is indeed very strong is exactly on the Descendant, sextiel Venus on MC and Pluto in 5th house, inconjunct Mars in 12th house. Neptune is part of Yod figure between Pluto, Venus (the sextiling planets ) and Mars at the apex.

  16. Wow,

    I am really surprised that this post from last year has kicked up so much interest now. I checked my chart and saw that Neptune is hitting my progressed moon in Aquarius and the transiting moon is trine all of that.

    Sounds like the co-dependency issue should have its own post, but that would be up to Jeffrey.

    Pam, I understand what you mean about Fantasy Island. Having Mars opposite Neptune and a Pisces Moon, sometime my glasses are a little too rose colored, especially when it comes to men.

  17. @Beth, a codependency post sounds great!

  18. Neptune in the 7th house in Pluto is kickin my a$$ right now…lol…so, Im just gonna hold still for a minute. Get my footing staight on a few things within, then take on the fight with this energy on another day. Sometimes the best approach is to retreat, re-evaluate the strategy, do some strength conditioning…then try again later. The most impprtant thing is not giving up in defeat. Nothing wrong with a much needed retreat.

  19. Hi Beth love you article :) i have neptune in the 7th house which is aspected by jupiter in my 10th house i have dated many bad apples do you think there is hope for me if i do serious backchecks and not sugarcoat things??? xox v

  20. I have neptune in seventh house with sagittarius l love someone he leaves me alone and marry with another girl but still lm waiting for him i dont know how to handle sitution

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