Can Libra girl get her Pisces ex back?

September 6, 2008 by Jeffrey Kishner  


libraBee writes,
Hi Jeff!
I was dating my pisces male for 6 months when he broke up with me. I’m 2 years older than him, have a great career, my own house, keep in shape,educated, big romantic and attractive. He is gorgeous, very well educated, in the military and has a great sense of humor. We have a lot in common in that we like to do a lot of the same things (ie music, wine tasting, cooking, board games). He didn’t call me very often-which was fine. But I hated when he wouldn’t return my calls. At 3 months, he didn’t take my calls for 2 days and i just showed up at his place and he was there watching TV. So I completely trust him and know that this is just him. But sometimes, I have a little too much to drink and the ‘needy girl’ in me comes out. One night, (after we’d had a great evening and too much wine) I started pressing him and asking why he doesn’t call me back. I told him I just needed reassurance…but in retrospect, I realize I nagged a little too much. He left my house that night and broke up with me the next day.

I realize that I nagged and the phone calls really aren’t a big deal, when i think about the things he WAS doing to show me he cared. I’ve figured I’d give him space and contact him in about a month. Do you think its possible for us to get back together? And what advice do you have for me to do this?

libraBee,

Libra needs a sense a balance and is very relationship-oriented. For this sign, partnership is all about give-and-take. I rub your back, you rub mine. The form of the transaction does not have to be the same (as you write, he DID do things to show he cared), but there needs to be a feeling of equity. However, not returning calls is just plain rude, and civil discourse is Libra’s domain. But it does not sound like his lack of reciprocity bothered you on the level of manners, so much as that you felt he did not show he values you.

Pisces requires solitude. A native born under this sensitive sign needs time alone to process all the sensory impressions and feelings that he has absorbed throughout the day. Your ex also has communication planet Mercury in Pisces, further contributing to a disinclination towards chattiness. [View his chart.] You have Sun and Mercury in Libra, and as much as all air signs love to talk, Mercury in Libra needs verbal communication in order to feel connected. [View her chart.] Potentially problematic is a near exact quincunx, or 150-degree angle, between your respective Mercurys. With an aspect like this, there’s pretty much no way to see “eye-to-eye.” Your communications to each other require constant adjustment (a keyword for this aspect). One way to conceptualize the challenge of the quincunx is that the two signs have absolutely nothing in common: they are neither of the same element (Libra is air, Pisces is water); modality (Libra is cardinal, Pisces is mutable); nor polarity (Libra is positive, Pisces is negative). Libra and Pisces speak vastly different languages.

It sounds like this break-up was fairly recent. If so, transiting Saturn — planet of burdens and restriction — is exactly opposing his Mercury. The opposition aspect often manifests in relationships, and he would have experienced you as Saturnian, i.e., he’d feel pressure from you to get him to talk more. Your expectations feel like a weight to him — he does not want to feel duty-bound to follow any protocol with regards to the phone.

Saturn is going to — from our perspective on Earth — move backwards at the turn of the year, and before it moves forward again (in mid-May) it will be a few degrees from his natal Mercury — which means that although the pressure will temporarily pass in October (in a month), it will come back in the Spring. So even if you do get back together, you may have to confront the same issue eight months from now.

I gather that he might be more receptive to you given some space, but you need to come on less strong. Your Mercury is conjunct Pluto, and it’s possible that intimacy via communication feels like a life-or-death issue for you, i.e., you are extreme. I suggest you find a way to meet this intense Plutonian need elsewhere. Don’t try to get it met solely through a man. Perhaps you can using writing as a way to probe the depths of your soul, and thus get at the root of your neediness. If you spend the next month on this “project,” you may be less invested in having your Pisces show his love in the way that you want. So just contact him and tell him you trust him and appreciate that he shows he cares in his way.

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Comments

3 Responses to “Can Libra girl get her Pisces ex back?”
  1. libraBee says:

    Thanks for your insight!
    You described me dead-on. I sent him an email a week ago expressing how I understood why he was upset, how the pace of our relationship was fine with me, etc. He hasn’t written back (as i expected), but he did do something to let me know he read it. My question is this: I was planning on contacting him next week for a no-pressure lunch to return some of his belongings. Based on what you said, do you suggest i wait until October? My friends keep warning me that if i wait too long he’ll find someone else because he is such a great catch. I have trouble defining that line between coming on too strong and sense of urgency.

  2. Jeffrey Kishner says:

    Maybe around Sunday Sept 14. Transiting Mercury conjoins Venus, which makes communication more pleasing. Plus transiting Saturn will be two degrees away from his natal Mercury, lessening the weight. Don’t wait too long though because later that week (around the 18th or so) transiting Mercury will conjoin his Pluto, which makes for intense conversations. Which could be a good thing if you’re talking about where the relationship is really going, but bad if you want to keep things light.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Thanks again. I’ll keep you posted!

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