The Astrology of Kink: Virgo, the Fallen Angel
August 27, 2008 by Laura F. Walton
Leather and lace, fringe and fetish … in this series, we’ll take a peek at the kinkier side of the zodiac. Each sign has its own distinct sexual flavor; by combining the various tastes you find in the natal chart, each person’s unique sexual recipe begins to emerge. Let’s take a look at Virgo, one of the kinkiest signs around.
The symbol for Virgo is the Virgin, and it helps to keep in mind when dealing with this highly paradoxical sign. No matter how many times they’ve been around the block, Virgos always seem as fussy and particular as a first-timer. Don’t be fooled — this is only one half of this dual sign. Make no mistake: Virgo is dual, just like Gemini or Pisces, but Virgo often hides its duality, even from itself.
As an earth sign, they are less comfortable with the changeability of their mutable natures and often seek to suppress it. Part of Virgo wants to remain pristine and proper, while the other part wants to get down and dirty. Virgo enacts the tense “virgin/whore” polarity in almost all aspects of life, and this can result in some intriguing bedroom quirks, to say the least.
Foremost, Virgo is Mercury-ruled, and can build elaborate mental fences around their most taboo desires. They tend to create exacting-but-arbitrary conditions under which specific desires can be satisfied (as in “only if her name starts with P,” or “only on a Tuesday during tax season.”) If a Virgin violates her own rules, she feels unpleasantly grubby. If her conditions are met, she feels just dirty enough — she maintains her “virgin” status but has given the “whore” her due.
Both the dirt and the whore metaphors can become a literal part of Virgo’s sex life. Your Virgo may cringe in horror if you have a spot on your shirt, but then the duality strikes: you discover that he has a real lust for sex in dirty, squalid, or even demeaning locations. Or, after fainting dead away when you forget to wash your hands in the restroom, they may inform you that they’re turned on by the idea of scat play, enema play, and watersports. The contradictions can be surprising.
The Virgo influence is often found in charts of people who enjoy humiliation as part of domination scenarios; they can make great slaves. There’s also a tendency to hire sex workers, or to haunt the strip bars and peep shows — the cheaper, the better, on both counts.
Virgos are also prone to wanting two partners. This is not quite the same as Gemini’s Mercurial curiosity; the Virgo who wants two partners sincerely believes he or she needs two full-time wives, or two full-time husbands, or possibly one of each. Permanent menage a trois living situations often center around a strong Virgo, particularly a Plutonian one.
Not every Virgo-influenced lover will go to extremes. In the case of this sign, it seems that the more influence given to Virgo in the chart (especially with aspects from Saturn or Pluto) the more likely the kinks. A stand-alone Virgo Sun or Virgo Venus, for instance, may merely result in a lover who is somewhat reticent, even prudish, on the surface, but surprisingly erotic when the lights go down. Most will have their peculiarities, though, and anyone who loves them must be able to accommodate.
If you’re willing to navigate the complexities of Virgo sexuality, you’ll be rewarded with a responsive, inventive, lovable lover. This sign has its quirks, yes, but Virgo relationships are often highly devoted and emotionally rich. If you think you can handle the sexy ambivalence of a perpetually falling angel, find yourself a Virgin. The experience will be unforgettable.
About the Author
Laura F. Walton is a writer, artist, and arts instructor based in Texas. She has been a practicing astrologer for nearly ten years; she specializes in areas of sexuality, individuality, and creative self-discovery. She has contributed forecasts for print media, and currently provides monthlies on her blog Astro What?
Related post: Will a Virgo female get dirty in bed?
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ooh, i’ve been waiting for the Virgo entry, but I don’t know that it describes me, as I only have a Virgo sun.
Question: Can these be read according to Ascendants or is it Sun sign-primarily?
What an interesting insight into Virgo world. Really apt. I have a number of Virgo friends who display this duality so interestingly. The earthy nature and mercurial nature can be so easily forgotten when they seem to pick at the spots on your clothes. Is it just me, or are some Virgos surprisingly ‘literal’ when it comes to creative communication. Symbolism, jokes, exaggeration etc don’t go down easily in a conversation
Interestingly I’m a Virgo (9/19/69)and I was born with my Pluto in Virgo in the 8th house of Sexuality. My Venus in Leo. I can definitely relate to what this article is saying. On the surface I am seemingly very pure and demure, but inside I’m very kinky and tend to be openly adventurous in the bedroom. Great article!
Thanks, guys! I just love Virgos…they’re such fascinating people, full of interesting paradox and enigma.
@ GSV: Yes, these can be read for either Sun, Ascendant, Mars, or Venus signs, though the effect is somewhat different. A person’s sexual personality is the result of a combination of factors, so these articles are meant to describe sign tendencies, rather than sign certainties.
Each sign has its quirks, depending on where it’s placed. For instance, the Virgo Ascendant can be a fairly strong physical/sexual influence, if other chart factors support it. On the other hand, a Gemini Ascendant (Gemini is the other Mercury-ruled sign) is rarely physically indicative. Mercury in Earth (Virgo) is more physically expressed than Mercury in Air (Gemini) and therefore is more noticeable in the sex life.
Does that make sense? Each sign has a slightly different mode of expression, depending on where it’s coming from….
Interesting.
What could Lilith in Virgo mean, particularly in the fourth house?
Actually Lilith conjunct Vesta in Virgo in the fourth.
@Lucky, I don’t work with Lilith. Perhaps someone else can help out?
Hi Lucky! I’m going to give you my take on Lilith, though mine is a little different– I hope a few others comment, too.
Lilith (Black Moon Lilith, anyway) is not a planet or physical body; it’s a mathematical point in the chart. I do work with Lilith, but only in a specialized way: the point doesn’t do anything at all unless it’s activated, preferably by an actual conjunction in a synastry.
This Lilith point represents solely feminine power, the kind of power that makes for femme fatales, for uppity women, and sometimes for fatal attractions. If a woman’s Sun falls in conjunction with a man’s Lilith point, for instance, he will tend to have very intense reactions to her– often, he sees her as the most irresistable seductress on earth, but sometimes he sees her as a “Whore of Babylon”-type figure. Whatever the reaction, it’ll be strong, and it’ll be directed at her specifically as a woman, not as just another member of the human race.
In a woman’s chart, if someone else activates her sensitive Lilith point by conjunction, she’ll have to confront her own female-specific power through that relationship.
Otherwise, in my experience, Lilith just sits dormant. The sign in which Lilith is placed colors its effect somewhat– it has to do with the manner in which a person experiences the female-specific power– but sign and house placement is not as important in a natal reading as that of the actual bodies. Even the smaller asteroids have more of a constant effect than Lilith does.
However, when your femme fatale encounters are operating, they’ll be somewhat Virgo-colored. Some possible keywords: bisexuality and gender reversals (especially if you’re predominantly monosexual most of the time), health-related issues (especially those related to vulnerability, or “savior/caretaker” dynamics), and definite service-related roles. I don’t know what your personal gender/sexual preference is from your comment, but I’ll venture this: when your Lilith is activated, you’ll find hints about the nature of The Feminine through service to others. How does The Feminine (as an energy) use service as a means to control situations? What responsibilities come with that sort of power? How and when do you use it, and for what ends?
Probably too much information, lol, but I hope it helps….
What kind of affect would a Virgo woman, who’s Mercury and Lilith is also in Virgo have on a man who’s South node and Vesta that’s in Virgo, and is in opposition to the woman’s Moon and North node?
Also, is the use the Feminine exclusive to women? If not, I’m also interested in the role the sixth house may play in this equation with Pluto residing therein.
As far as bisexuality and gender reversal being a keyword, that’s pretty much been a no-no, even with Virgo women, however I’m very attracted to women who stand up for themselves – a quality I’ve noticed in most Virgo women as well Capricorns and Scorpios.
I guess you could say that I’m bisexual to the extent that I acknowledge my “feminine side” (or “anima” if you’re into Jungian psychology) and strive to bring it into equilbrium with my masculine self, but I believe that’s called androgyny. Other than that, I’m strictly heterosexual. I will note that a few Virgo women in my life were either bi or bi-curious.
Excellent article. My Virgo man has a Scorpio rising and Gemini moon. I am an Aries woman with a Cancer rising and Libra moon. Our sex is crazy hot! He has that kinky side going on (ex. water sports, lactation…) and his porn collection is like nothing I have ever seen before. I am pretty sexually open and experimental. There is almost nothing I have not tried. I wanted to trade my life of sexual excitement for something more sustaining and stable. Virgo man knows how to help me reach optimum functioning in the bedroom – he holds me and caresses me while we are lying in bed, I am able to gaze up at him as we do this…I love feeling that I am in his (Scorpio power). My Cancer rising responds well to this. With the foundation laid for intimacy, he is very rough and dominant with me…and the Aries side of me flourishes under such conditions. This is my second Virgo guy…and the sparks just fly!!! I’m glad our physical relationship is so awesome…the way we relate emotionally…meh, not so much!
What about Pisces N Virgo in the bedroom ?!?!?!
i think i read one article 24/7 turn on ( a pisces woman an virgo man !) Yes ! cannot wait !!!
Do Virgo guys like to seduce or be seduced? Whenever I used to think of a Virgo guy in the bedroom I picture a shy boylike man that lost his pants and cries that you can see him, after reading this its nice to have a different picture
LOL
@libralady.. thats funny !!! lol i didnt get that far, hes frustrated the life out me, not very forward,and too busy
Thats sad SG,
I never got that far with the only Virgo guy I went out with either, LOL But we were just kids then in our early teens, He was cruel to other girls that liked him, so I told him he was a jerk…. The sad thing is he was nice to me, but seeing him treat other people so mean like that made me angry. I do hear all the time about how virgo guys are busy all the time, its amazing how many women in love with a Virgo say the same thing…..
hey, well im glad im not the only one :0)
Oooohhhhh thats why virgos get nasty at the most unexpected times, dualty who would of thought.