Cancer man wants to make flirtatious Gemini girlfriend jealous

[ad#link]Micah (view chart) writes,

My girlfriend is of course a gemini, and we’ve been dating for about 2 months. As you know gemini’s are the flirtatious kind, and I can get a little jealous. But i don’t tell her i’m jealous because i know they hate when you tell them to stop flirting. My question is How Can I make my gemini girlfriend jealous?


Instead of making your Gemini girlfriend jealous, why don’t you just work on your own jealousy issues? Her flirting is triggering your own insecurities about how much of a “hold” you have on her. Perhaps you are afraid she will leave you for someone more interesting. You have your Sun, Moon and Venus in Cancer. This Water sign desires security, and with your planets of needs and affection here, you want to be coddled. When you watch your Gemini girlfriend flirt, your feelings may be akin to that of seeing your mother pay attention to your siblings instead of enveloping you in her love 24/7.

Mars, your action planet, is in possessive Taurus. Your impulse is to take what you feel is yours — and forget about sharing! Planetary heavyweights Saturn and Pluto add to your frustration. Saturn squares your Mars from Aquarius. You don’t feel you belong, and this insecurity only fuels your desire to cling to your relationship. An opposition to Mars from Pluto in Scorpio intensifies your jealousy.

Neither Cancerian clinginess nor Taurean possessiveness are attractive to a Gemini. And trying to make a Gem stop flirting is like telling a car it’s not supposed to drive. Just continue to be interesting so that she stays fascinated with you.

~ Jeffrey

Related post: Gemini woman and jealous Cancer man. Can it work?

Comment below: Have you ever made a Gemini jealous? If so, how?

About Jeffrey Kishner

Jeffrey Kishner is founder and publisher of Sasstrology. He is a licensed mental health counselor and has been doing astrological counseling since 2001. Jeffrey has been published in print magazines including The Mountain Astrologer and Dell Horoscope, and has written online for sites including AOL, and StarIQ. Jeffrey has also been heavily involved in the astrology blogger community. Read his personal blog at


  1. Shygirl says:

    And trying to make a Gem stop flirting is like telling a car it’s not supposed to drive…

    Jeffrey, are you suggesting that anyone dating & or in relationship with a Gemini just has to accept this ‘fact’ & not expect anything different from them? That doesn’t seem fair to me. Just as the Cancer guy needs to work on his insecurities/possessiveness (BTW, I feel you on that one, Cancer guy….:-)), shouldn’t the gem girl be expected to curb her flirting tendencies as well out of respect for his feelings?

  2. Laura F. Walton says:

    I’ve had a lifetime of entanglements with Gems, Aquarians, and Mercurial men (my Mars & Saturn is in Gem, my Venus & Mercury in Aquarius) and I have to agree with Jeff: you either take them or leave them, flirting and all. Another fun Mercury-person game is to fall in and out of love with you at least four times a year (this is often accompanied by brief “relationships” with other people, though not always physical ones, thank god.)

    It drove me crazy when I was younger. It still drives me a little crazy, but it’s also taught me self-sufficiency and the value of emotional flexibility.

    Of course, this is easier for me to say, since my love planets are all air themselves!

    No, Gem will never stop flirting, and no, Cancer/Taurus will never stop trying to possess. But if there’s enough maturity and tolerance, both Cancer and Gemini could very well learn to love and accept one another as very different people.

    My two cents, for what it’s worth!

  3. Shygirl says:

    After reading your post, I can only reach one conclusion that I better NEVER get involved with a Gemini. Kudos to those who can take this type of ‘relationship’, I know myself well enough to know that, it will push me over the edge (of sanity, that is)…:-) I am a Cap Sun & Cancer ascendant with mutliple Plutonic connections in my chart. This would drive me CRAZY. Interestingly I’ve Gem Moon myself, one that I have never identified with really, feels more like Cancer moon to me.It was interesting to read your viewpoint though.

  4. Jeffrey Kishner says:

    Yes, shygirl, I think one does pretty much have to accept this ‘fact.’ But flirting can be harmless, what counts is how devoted the Gemini is to his or her partner. One has to remember that it doesn’t have to be personal.

  5. HappyGoLuckyAquarianGirl says:

    Cancer man,
    So you want to make your flirtatious Gemini girlfriend jealous, then I suggest you do the same. She probably might flirt more but show her that it doesn’t bother you.

    BUT I think you should not do that and just talk to her and see if she is doing it because she is a flirt or because she is looking for some attention that she might be lacking in your relationship. If she is doing it because she is just a flirt, maybe you can let her know that it bothers you and if she can tone it down a bit. If she is doing it because she is lacking some attention in your relationship, then you guys need to address that. If she doesn’t want to compromise, then I say RUN and don’t look back.

    Hope it works between you guys. Best of wishes. Keep us posted.

  6. Jokerista says:

    Hi Jeff, this is a Piscean woman posting about a Capricon man. I have just met him, he is from work, and we have met each other two times. How can I tell if he is interested in me? I dont want to take the first step here, or do anything which will make me look like a fool. We ( him, me and another girl and a guy from office) are to meet up at his place next week.

    So far, he has told me and the other girl about his parents, his sister, his niece, his work, his work, his work ( which I dont mind, I too love talking about work), what he thinks about the country we are living in etc…

    Any tips, helps, would be very appreciated!

  7. Jeffrey Kishner says:

    @jokerista, I wonder if a Capricorn would make romantic moves on a coworker, could be risky. They tend to be reserved in their expression of affection. I’d say any efforts at all to be alone with you could be interpreted as interest.

  8. Anonymous says:

    Hey people, I am a Gem girl dating a Cancer man, and all I can say is that our relationship is perfect! He knows I like to flirt but he also knows that its very inocent and I don’t want to hurt him in any ways because I love him. When we flirt, we don’t go all the way, we just like flirty conversations with people because this is stimulating our brains. But when I flirt with some guys, this doesn’t mean that I will kiss them or do something dirty with them, because I don’t need to. I have my man out there and he is lovely and all I want in him!!! So, don’t be scared to date a Gem person, we are harmless and very innocent!!

  9. Anonymous says:

    Hi Gem Girl, maybe you think your relationship is perfect, you can flirt and he understands. But maybe he doesnt think its perfect and suffering by it. Maybe he is hiding it. Dont be surprised, if suddenly he says good bye to you:) I dont think cancers like flirtatious partners, but some of them can hide it.
    I know, that Gems flirting is really innocent, but every person I know who is dating a Gem is suffering(openly or secretly) from their constant flirting

  10. Anonymous says:

    hiii im a gem girl n i would like to say i agree wih jeff you either take it or leave it but flirting with other people as she does will not make her jealous she will jus drift farther away from you she will flirt even more and than in her flirting she may find some one more intresting than you either she may cheat on you or leave and if she see’s you flirting she will probaly wont even cheat n she will just leave beacause she see you flirting as moving on beacause you never really flirt right?
    so the best thing for you to do is just tell her how u feel

  11. Anonymous says:

    Ignore her! That’s the best way. But not too much, but just enough. And when she goes on and on talking, interrupt her and tell her something funny a girl “friend” said to you that you found hilarious. I’ve dated many Geminis, so I know what gets to them.

  12. Anonymous says:

    I am a gemini girl and i LOVE to flirt -it has nothing to do with the person that I am romantically involved with. IT’s a completely seperate thing. I would just learn to accept it. Obviously she should be respectful and not cross the line but weather I am single or with a boyfriend, I love to flirt. It does not take away from anything I feel for the person that I’m with.

  13. Well, geminis are not flirty, they just like to talk with different kind of people which includes both guys and girls, and if those people are guys then obviously you will feel insecure and jealous. It seems like they are flirting but the fact is they are not flirty. And Lol i have seen what the people are saying that if shes doing this then you should do the same, i just want to tell you one thing that if you will do the same thing( i mean flirting) then believe you me she will SURELY leave you. And im sorry to say atleast she is talking to guys or her freinds or whoever they are in front of YOU, i have seen so many Girls flirting with other guys when their boyfreinds leave them only for 15 minutes or cheat on them when they don’t see their guys for a week or so. Geminis are what they are, they will be the same when you are with them or without them. And if u still really feel insecure then better tell your girl that” I love you but sometimes I feel really insecure when you talk to guys, i trust you from the bottom of my heart but im sorry im really possesive when it comes to ones who i love thats the way im, i wanted to tell you this for many days but i thought you would think im insecure and all, which im not, i just feel for you blah blah “thats kind of a long letter..hehe…personally i don’t think geminis like insecure pple but if this thing is really bothering you then tell her what you think.

  14. Btw, im not a gemini but my friend is-:)

  15. Bravo, Geminis ! Only a Gemini can justify flirting while having an affairt at the same time. Geminis indeed have excellent communication skills thats for sure.Lets analyse the real problem here. Cancer man jealous of Gemini Girl flirting. Clearly from this post it appears that flirting is a innocent game to Geminis. But not for cancerians. Being a long term guy, flirting to cancerian are like the initial stages of ultimately falling in love and perhaps getting married some day. Thats what Geminis dont seem to understand why Cancerians are insecure of their partner flirting. To Cancer male, it means their partners are looking for new options and the relationship he is in, is terminal.

  16. Currently (and only temporarily) me (Scorpio) and my Scorpio friend are renting a place with his mother (a Cancer) and her boyfriend (a Gemini), and even though I go out of my way to avoid the boyfriend – for reasons I’m about to state – every time they are drinking and get in an argument, I hear her hollering my name, asking him why he doesn’t just go talk to me (aka the slut) since he likes me so much and is waiting around for me to come out of the shower just to get a glimpse….. and blah blah blah.

    The insecurity is so extreme on her part that she conjures up irrational ideas and reasons to be angry every time something doesn’t go her way, and then proceeds to manipulate and play guilt trips.
    She is a pretty dysfunctional person, to say the least… not that all Cancers are, but (and this goes for my kind too πŸ˜‰ ) there can be a tendency to let insecurities take you and your loved ones for an emotional roller coaster ride.

    In regards to jealous Cancer and social Gemini… don’t let her interactions with the opposite sex make you insecure. Love her for her and don’t jump to negative conclusions or try to manipulate a desired response out of her to satiate your insecurity, or you surely will push her away. Talk it through, Gems do love talking after all, do they not? πŸ˜‰
    That’s my 2 or 3 cents on the Can-Gem love dynamics, tho it goes for any relationship. ;P

  17. well iam a gemini (female) and im in a situaTION similar to this and my advise to you is to not let it get to you she’s goin to flirt its in her nature what human doesnt its normal but to a certain extent if she gets out of line simply tell her how u feel but if u keep going back and forth you going to b left alone, and what i’ve recently found out after dealing with my cancer guy is that cancer men are very jealous and insurcure and have problems expressing themselves and saying how they truly feel about a situation and after seeing what your asking advise on i find that to be true, instead of hiding behind your emotions tell her how u feel instead of holding back , because at the end of the day looks how on her askig for advise you not her she’s out there fliting away

  18. Good day to everyone, especially to Jeffrey!

    I don’t think you can stop your Gemini woman from flirting especially if the relationship had just begun coz her feeling is not yet progressing. However, you should show CONSISTENT care, passion and love to her for she wants to see how true your feelings are to her. Be “visible” every now and then by calling her or texting or seeing her everyday.

    Show to her that she is very important to you until she loves you back so deeply.Do not be threatened on what she is doing (like talking to other guys) for she just wanted to see how you react on such, so better show that you are jealous but not totally freaking, huh…

    Believe me, in few months, she will be chasing after you!!!

  19. I’m dating a Gemini man and boy is he a flirt. He works in retail and is constantly meeting new people (mostly women) He gives them his phone number and talks to them at work and at home. He says it’s nothing. He is always at home and 99.9% of the time I know where he is or what he is doing. He tells me he loves me and he knows what is good for him. He tells me he is not trying to sleep with any of them, he just likes to flirt and have conversation. Well, it drives me NUTS!! Leo’s can be a bit jealous and no matter how much I try and hide it, my jealously always seems to win. I don’t know what to do. Do I ignore it or leave?

  20. I had dated with three cancer men and i am a gem girl. Never there is a good ending.
    Anyway, the way you can stop her being flirty is simple – ignore her.
    Cos i am being ignored now – by a cancer man and i am really hurt.
    The colder he is to me the deeper i love him. He’s a prick! Loser!
    Anyway, if u need a suggestion that will definitely work for u, i am quite sure.
    Stop calling her
    Stop texting her
    Give her pleasurable sex that she can’t forget (remember, cos she’s a flirt)
    Make her jealous by showing her some evidence that you might be dating with other girls

  21. I have a Gemini stellium in the 12th house – Sun, Venus, Saturn, Mecury and the Ascendant.

    I’ve dated several Geminis and I think I’ve got a pretty good handle on them now.

    One thing you do not want to do is play emotional games with a Gemini, you have to be pretty adept at this and believe me, it is not easy to try and get one over on a Gem, no matter how smart and accomplished you think you are (Im a Gem and even I learned this the hard way). If a Gem has been hurt previously, they will be highly sensitive to it and they will know just where your games are coming from and how. They dont need proof of your game playing, they only need to suspect it and its all on, even if you think you’re extremely secure in your relationship they will play back harder, meaner and with emotional detachment and the worst thing is – you wont even know it unless they want you to. So if you plan on trying to make one jealous, be really sure you know what you’re doing because once the damage is done a Gem can walk away and not give you a second thought.

    The best thing you can do to secure a Gem is to love them, openly and honestly. Let them grow accustomed to your love and show reassurance by actions as well as words.

    Breadtalk said it best “show CONSISTENT care, passion and love to her for she wants to see how true your feelings are to her. Be β€œvisible” every now and then by calling her or texting or seeing her everyday.”

    A Gemini has difficulty with intimacy, no matter what they tell you. Feeling emotions deeply is scary for them but once they develop trust for you and are able to trust your love for them, they can be the most loving and loyal people you could imagine and they will begin to be open with it – dont take advantage of it because they will detach from you in a heartbeat. Flirting is a fancy for them, if they are serious about you then they look at flirting as a battle of wits (notice how bored they get when the person they are flirting with starts to get taken in by it).

    I dont think there is any other astrological sign that is as intuitive and ruthless as a Gemini except maybe Scorpio. But thats another story, my last long term relationship with a Scorpio was definitely my last relationship with a Scorpio!

  22. LOL, Ive met a few Taurus women that were a force to be reckoned with πŸ™‚ When their guys did them wrong, it was nasty…..

  23. Here’s a detail that will put this whole thing to rest.

    I’m a Gemini female. I only flirt when I’m NOT interested in someone. I DO NOT flirt with a person if I am genuinely interested in them. Why, you may ask? Very simple: We want a man who will fall in love with us for our minds. This is true for every Gemini woman I have ever met. If a Gemini female is flirting with a man she is either bored, trying out her latest new vocabulary addition, or playing with you or testing you (but only if you have played with or tested her). This is perhaps why we have the reputation of being the ‘heartbreakers’ of the zodiac; interest is perceived where none actually exists and men are left wondering “what happened?!”.
    So, this is all news to me.

  24. I am a gemini girl, its not that we flirt, its that we are great conversationalist we love to share and hear other people view on every and anything. Most time if I like someone i wud not talk to them unless they speak to me first. This is bcuz i wud like 2 know that the person is attracted 2 me first. So if it seems she is flirting she is not, she maybe just talking and being friendly. However most men seems to be very attracted to gemini women since we are very intelligent, down to earth and we can be their best buddy. lol we are very committed once we found the one but we are easily bored, hence we feel the need to do new things which includes meeting new people.

  25. stormshadow8 says:

    Wow…I wish I had found this site two weeks ago. I’m a cancer man, and currently have been in relations with a gemini woman for a little over a year. One thing I can tell you all. The Gemini woman is what every man in the room wants. Her personality alone will fill all empty glasses of hope, that you will find true love. She gives you that happiness that you are so happy you came out that night. She is excellent at making the cancer man’s blues go away. However, it will come to terms with the size of your wallet, and the willingness to let go of her flirting ways. A gemini will, deep down, want you to provide for her all the way. Making sure that she has things above and beyond what you can give her. If she thinks there is any room for potential to make herself grow more, then she will find herself into you. If you’re willing to let her free spirit look, and make eye contact with anyone in the room. Then it will work. You have to be willing to forget she is acting like a flirt, and let her live her own life. She’s going to need a little space. A few months ago, we took a short break for a month. Until I saw what was really out there and found myself doing everything I could to win the gemini hearts back. She ended up coming back, for the remainder of last year. We ran into a little problem the last few weeks, and i started to get jealous of how she was acting around other guys. I started to get really clingy. Violent, and lost my cool on a number of occasions. It turned her off. She doesn’t like someone clinging on. She needs room. She needs to be able to spread her energy into the world. Now that the holidays are over, and the fact that there will be nothing more for me to provide her with, I have gotten the taking a break conversation yet again. I have apologized for being possessive, however this time it may be too late to win her back. She doesn’t see anything more that she can gain from me. I have nothing left, because not only did the gemini woman heel my bluesy blue heart, and filled it with love. She also took everything I had in my heart and crushed all my dreams and passions in life. Telling me that she didn’t believe I could ever achieve any of my goals. The gemini has excellent verbal skills. She is always on her feet, and quick witted. Stemming from the way she always flirts in the room. They have issues with commitment. However the cancer man usually always willing to give up everything at a shot of love. Because if you have cracked into the cancer shell, he will be left vulnerable to be taken advantage of. When you hurt a cancer man’s dreams, he is left with nothing. No hope at life at all. My only advice to all of you cancer men out there. Maintain a constant form of mutual communication. Make sure that you continue to be sexually active with your partner. If things come to light, that she is not in the mood you must find a way to keep her interested. Cancer men can tend to be very needy, and very hands on. If you find yourself becoming a little too grabby, and too in the moment let her go. Don’t ever muscle your way into her life. She will run away from that. She wants to remain friends however, and that will be the hardest thing for me to do right now. Because like we all know cancer men are very sentimental, and never forget anything. It’s very hard for both parties to forgive and forget. But if you can do both, and somewhere find that mutual agreement. Then everything will work. Good luck to you all. I’m right there with you.

  26. AphroditeBull says:

    My father is a Gemini. When he was married to my mother (a Leo), he cheated constantly. He is currently in a long term relationship with a Libra. In his fifties, he still remains, a faithful cheater. His excuse, I love meeting new people. I need constant mental stimulation, I hate being tied down in one area. A Gemini is restless!

    One of my best friends is a Gemini. He is 100% faithful to his girlfriend. She is also a Gemini. I think they get along well with their counterparts! Or possibly a Sag who shares their love and passion for freedom!

    But a Cancer and a Gemini is a recipe for disaster! If he does not voice his opinion on her constant flirting, he is waiting for a golden opportunity to strike back. He may try to get her jealous, manipulate a situation, sleep with one of her friends, or just simply terminate the relationship.

  27. LIbraLady says:

    I’ve never gone out with a Cancer man, my son (14) is one so was my father. I knwo that you guys are needy, no more then a Libra though, we are just as bad LOL
    One great match I’ve noticed a lot are Scorpio women and Cancer men, what a great team! Its like “us against the world” You love your Gemini lady, thats terrific, just remember though, she will need even more mind stimulation then a Libra woman, and can turn on a dime emotionally…..Its funny though, sometimes it will just work, Im engaged to an emotional, possesive and grabby/needy Aquarian man, and thats a rare find, πŸ™‚ BTW, not all women dislike that. Some of us love being needed. I’ve never been happier. Oh, and I’m sure she needs you too πŸ™‚ Be yourself

  28. I would not advise trying to make a Gemini woman jealous as she will just move on when she finds out you are doing it deliberatly .As for her flirting I am sure thats what attracted you to her in the first place,

  29. So true that one must look upon his own problem and insecurities before focusing on other people’s issue. If your girlfriend flirts around and greatly affects you, you must assess yourself first and see why does it greatly affect you.

  30. ShiningGem says:

    First, as a gem, geminis are just really sociable people and too friendly and nice for their own good so if anyone starts to talk with them, odds are they will talk back and be friendly. What they mean when they said gems do harmlessly flirting is because its usually just innocent talking. Especially gemini girls. We love talking to a bunch of people but that doesn’t mean anything! We are most of the time not even serious with our responses and don’t give a damn but we will still smile and act like we do.

    You will usually know when a gem is seriously interested in you. We won’t try to hide it, just lookout for the signs. One good and main important sign is, the person we like or is interested in, we won’t be able to look away from you for long. We are starers if we found something we like or/and interested in. Our main priority, our focus will be draw to our interest. You will have our full attention if we are into you.

    But alot of gems are shy and very nervous, is what other signs fail to recognize or see. Especially about someone we like because we don’t want to make them angry, annoyed, or turned off with us, you know.

    i know for certain, i wouldn’t approach the one i like without them approaching me first. I just stare longingly at them, taking in all the features i like and watching them. I have to see if they like me as well. πŸ™‚ if they do, i would try to play it cool and layer on the flirting buuuuuut probably just come out as a nervous, giggling mess hahaha

    but in response to this post, yeah. Jealously won’t work on a gemini like that. I mean we get plenty of jealous, possesive, territorial but we ain’t gotta let you see it or let it show. Plus if you make us jealous, we will let you go, thinking its for the best. Thinking that’s what you wanted right?

    The best way of getting back is to ignore her, make her realize what she’s missing. Or just talk to her, let her know what you feel. But understand she needs freedom, she want to talk and learn things and make new people.

    a way to keep her is to keep things exciting. Keep her interested in you by teaching some things. Impress her by your knowledge. Show her something your good at. Teach something new. Take her on adventures and have fun with her, tell her how much you love her and shower her with affection time to time. Show her your passionate about her and try to understand her (we gems crave understanding). Talk to her. But also give her a a little freedom and she’ll love you.

    It sounds like a lot but its all simpler than said. Hoped i helped with anyone trying with a gemini! we’re lovely nice people who usually want positivity and crave someone who holds our attention without even trying. We are not indifferent to things, we just sometimes choose to shut off our emotions. The other gems might hate me for telling this but its actually just a defense mechanism.

    We been hurt too much by friends, family and lovers that we block ourselves off. To protect our true childishly inner innocence. How could we still smile so brightly and laugh carelessly and free even after all the pain and stress that is life and heartbreak?

  31. ShiningGem says:

    Also, good luck to all the incompatibility couples that are out there trying even when everything says they’ll never make it!!! Prove astronomy wrong~ ? ? ?

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