Possessive Scorpio man doesn’t want Aquarius woman to have friends
March 7, 2008 by Jeffrey Kishner
aqua gurl provided a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,I have been dating a scorpio for a month and I have fallen madly in love with him, but I don’t know how he feels about me. He calls and text me everday and all day. He is so nice to me and then he could just lash out any time. One minute hes like i miss you and calls me baby. Then the next minute hes like im about to stop dealing with you real soon and then he’s back to nice mod. He is very possessive he does not want me to have friends but he can have friends. We have never been on a date cause he doesnt like to go out late when he has to work, We do talk on the phone all night. He doesn’t want anyone to know were dating not even my friend and she the one who hooked us up he says he doesnt want people from his job in his business. I love him and want to stick it out because I feel like his attitudes is just a way of showing me he loves me. What should I do? Does he love me or should i just move on?
Your Scorpio boyfriend is showing classic, stereotypical traits of his sign: possessiveness, secretiveness, reclusiveness. But so what if he loves you? What are you getting out of this relationship? You have generous Jupiter conjunct the cusp of your Seventh House of Partnership — in loving and compassionate Pisces, no less. You want to experience boundless, idealist love in a relationship — not to be controlled and have so many limitations placed on your love life.
You’ve never been on a date with him? He doesn’t want anyone — even your friend — to know you two are dating? Half the time he lashes out or implies he’s going to stop dealing with you? If you’ve fallen madly in love with him, I’m not going to question the validity of your feelings. Or maybe I will. Why would you put up with being treated this way?
You were born on a Leo Full Moon. You may be an Aquarius who’s cool with the distance afforded by this arrangement, but your Leo Moon wants to feel special, to be seen. And how can you receive validation when this guy doesn’t want to go out in public with you?
Did your Mommy and Daddy get along? A Full Moon baby can have parents who are constantly in opposition. Maybe you’re setting yourself up to repeat this pattern — by being in a relationship in which your needs won’t be met. I’m just saying.
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Hey Aqua girl,
I’m an aquarius myself and my second boyfriend was also a scorpio. Unlike you though, I always knew I didn’t truly love him, it was definitely lust and something else, but anyways… from my experience it’ll only get worse, I remember when my scorpio ex started like that, no one could know we were dating, then he finally introduced me to his mom and stepdad after 1 year later, and when we got engaged, it was the worst proposal ever, very detached and no warm feelings, then he said I could use my engagement ring at work or if I went out, but I couldn’t use it in front of his friends, parents, family or neighbors. After 2 and 1/2 years of stupid rules and possessivenes, I finally realized he wasn’t the guy for me and gave him my ring back, which was a great decision since he was having sex with his neighbor/friend/band mate’s niece. At that time he was 38 and I was 21, and his friend’s niece was 19. I hope to God your scorpio friend is this delusional, but they can be too much of a headache for a smart aquarian girl, we are in a different wave lenght so don’t try to ignore your instinct. If you already took the time to write this letter asking for advice on whether you should move on, then you must know what to do.
Correction:
I meant to write “I hope to God your scorpio friend ISN’T this delusional. My bad lol.
Interesting.
Hi Aqua Girl,
Geez, I lloked at your chart and thought it was mine for a moment! Ha.
I have dated and yes, even married a Scorp. Jealousy does reign, no doubt. Your man doesn’t just sound like a Scorp, he sounds like an abuser. Please, let him go and try to find someone who isn’t that secretive. Scorps, like any other person, can, will and do introduce you to the folks, like to show you off in front of friends (though you better not like them too much) and all the other things normal people do.
As a person born under a full moon and quincunx’s and hands of God running rampant through my chart, I know it is tough, but ya ‘gotta do what ya gotta do.
o my god seriously i started seeing a scorpio and everything you putin that firts paragraph is so true, during the day he sounds so annoyed if i text him, but at night hes like the sweetest guy ever! he gets really jeaouls to over my myspace,ugh maybe were doomed but im falling hard and fast for this guy i dont know what to do.
LISTEN and LISTEN GOOD!!! LET GOOOOOOO!!!! I JUST GOT OUT OF A HORRFIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A SCOPRIO PAIN IN MY ASSS!!!! AND I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO DAMN RELIFED IN ALL MY f***IN LIFE!!!! LET GO AND RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!! IM TELLIN U!!! LISTEN WHEN WISDOM SPEAKS!!!!!!
I AINT 31 FOR s***!!!! POSSIVE, JEALOUS, MANIPULATIVE ASS HELL BUT IT DIDIN WORK ON ME!!!!! HE CHECKED MY CELL PHONE ERRRRDAY!!!! ON THA HOUR!!!!! STALKED THA s*** OUT OF ME, SMELLED MY PANTIES, FOLLOWED ME THAT s*** AINT LOVE THATS THA 1ST SIGN OF A SERIAL KILLER!!!!!!!!!! DONT GET LOVE CONFUSED WITH A KILLER, LADY;S DONT BE STUPID, STAY CAUTION, TRUST ME!!!!! LOVE IS NOTHIN LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE +COMMUNICATION = TRUST!!!!!! IF U HAVE NO TRUST U HAVE NO RELATIONSHIP!!!!!!!! LET GO!!! 2009 IS MINE, PEACE!
Omg this is soo true..everything your sayin about scorpios are true I thought I was the only one dealing with this..he’s for yrs older than me 20 n im 16..I always thought he was bipolar because his attitude alwayz changed and then I found out he cheated on me(of course).so I broke up with him and stopped talking to him and tried to ignore him but he wouldn’t stop bothering me,he told me that even thought we broke up he didn’t want anything to change between the two of us and he would tell me how he didn’t want me to fall for another man and he didn’t want me to talk to other boys or anything.I told him I felt like he was being unfair and was trying to keep me hostage..there’s so much more to say but im done typing for now.. =’(
OMGEEEEEEEEEEEEE I am now married to a scorpio guy I love himmmmmm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much he does the whole bipolar thing too. it’s weird he will say like ok today is your day everything is for you and i’m like cool then later he complains because everything is always about me but he makes it about me. he is very jealous but let’s me have friends and I dont really mind him going through my stuff I’m not use to having any privacy as I have 3 brothrs and grew up with my parents all in my business. our biggest problem is that he cares more about money than paying attention to meeeeeeeeeee
))) we have a daughter and he is such a good daddy. I just hattttte that he is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo obsessed with money he makes me hate money.
aqua gurl:
Im capricorn/aquarius cusp and have had more involvement with scorpio than i want to mention, and it was identical to what you described, what you need to ask yourself is how much you love this guy, because this is him, and you will learn tools to deal with it, but this is him and it wont change, so its whether you can put up with it.
With the not letting you have friends, yeah he will do this, he wants to control you and by destroying your friendships you will be vulnerable and more likely to surrender to him. He wont even be aware he is doing it. I dodged round this, firstly i gave in, and then realised i needed and wanted my friends in my life, and thankfully they forgave me … i merged our friends together, got them all out together, and this worked, he stopped, and actually formned friendships with my friends.
The not telling anyone is because he likes his life to be private, and drama is a magnet to him, he does have strong feelings for you or he wouldnt be panicking about this, but he thinks if people know, the drama will begin and he will loose you to it, again merge your friends with him and his on a casual basis.
If he didnt like you, he wouldnt be doing this, it is all out of insecurity of loosing you, reassure him your there for him and nothing will drive you away.
The mood swings are him fighting his emotions, just take the angry side with a pinch of salt, because it will blow over quickly.
Im guessing he will have a major passion in his life … sport, job … there is always something that seems to gain all there time and attention, and whatever that thing is, this is where you need to do the merging, somehow make that part of yours and your friends lives, and gradually it will all fall together.
Scorpio men are very hard charectors to connect with, but if you love them the effort you have to put in is rewarded.
Im capricorn/aquarius cusp, and 15 years of my life was with a scorpio, i played every angle with him, and finally learnt how to deal with him, you have to learn to read him and find the tools to do this, it is like studying for an exam … learn, memorise … pay attention because every action has a hidden meaning and eventually you will learn to know what it going on underneath.
Never surrender to him or he will be gone!
Hey there, As you can tell i am an aquarius myself, in a relationship with a scorpio male. I felt compelled to reply having been in a relationship for about six months now. What can i say, but oh so very true….He is very possessive although he denies it and the thing about being a private person – ABSOLUTELY, he has met my family, but keeps me away from his, saying he’s a private person and doesnt want people to know about his private life. I believe him. He is extremely secretive and private. No one gets in.
I can’t say this has been an easy relationship, because of the intensity he brings, but he is so incredible, deeply sensitive, caring and passionate. I really do love him, but i find him hard to work out sometimes. I’ve found it is better to try not to fathom him out – it drives me mad.
I’ve read loads that aquarius and scorpio is a terrible combination – but i say it’s up to the individuals in the relationship. My father was a scorpio, and i see a lot of my father’s traits in my partner, so maybe i’m used to scorpio’s ways?
The sex is incredible, what they say about scorpio’s being terrific lovers, in my opinion is true, he is considerate, deeply sensual and it’s all about my pleasure. I have never met anyone like him before and probably not likely to either. It is AMAZING!
Even if the relationship goes nowhere, i’ve had an amazing time. Although i have a feeling he wont let me go lightly – once they give their hearts to that one person, it seems for life. It is no half measures, all or nothing. It seems to be all about intensity and connecting on a deep mystical level. I am completely enraptured.
I hear what others are saying, but all i would say is that not all scorpio’s are the same. Personally i love the way my scorpio man loves me. Our relationship is about being honest with each other and respecting our differences. I do joke with him from time to time if i feel he is being possessive or too intense and he apologises!
Good luck with your scorpio man.
cap/aqua girl, hey what do you mean by don’t surrender to him? our biggest problem right now well my biggest problem is that he’s trying to change me into his perfect girl (which doesn’t exist) I’m secure enough to know myself and just play along with his little game. I make him think he is in control for a while and then flip it real quick when he is least expecting it and he hates that feeling of not being in control of my thoughts and feelings for him or for anything. Sometimes he makes me so mad I just want to punch him in the face. but i’m learning how to be passive and let him think he has the upper hand. Our relationship is full of subconscious mind games not major ones just to keep him happy and tell him what he wants to hear. He’s pretty much figured out that I do that. Today, he told me some grl in a music video looked like me and I asked him if he’d do her lol and he got so offended and was like why do you ask me stuff like that it is so insulting blabla I was totally joking he is sooooooo serious. so we got into an argument because I always ask him questions like that jokingly and and he says I must think he’s a scumbag if I think he would do that and he thinks I don’t trust him but u know us aquarius and our sense of humor. And so what I don’t really trust any guys. but it’s not such a big issue that I’m always accusing him in a serious way just jokingly in my free spirited manner and he gets so upset. He said I was being very mean so whatever
I am a Sagittarius and was in a relationship with a Scorpio for a few months. This was before I read up on astrology. Now I know better! It was really good at first, and I didn’t notice him getting more and more possessive. Until the day he told me over the phone that he was jealous of me having lunch with a friend (a female). I’d been friends with that girl for more than 3 years at that stage and there was no way I was going to stop seeing her to placate him. It got worse from there and it wasn’t long before it was over.
In my experience, Scorpios and Sagittarius (and perhaps any fire sign) do not go well. Scorpio’s possessiveness would drown the free roaming Centaur with bad feelings and broken hearts all over the place when it finally goes down in a hail of fire (we aren’t known for our tact, unfortunately).
Hey Ashley,
I meant don’t surrender to him, as in give him what he wants … stop having friends, a life etc … i’ve done this thinking it would solve our problems, and the second i gave in and started doing what he wanted … he lost interest because i wasnt that strong fun girl he fell in love with.
The thing to remember with scorpios is they are really sensitive, take your girliest friend who cries at the drop of a hat, and that is scorpio, only you will never see it but it will be kept inside, and every time a girl would cry his moods will flip.
He will learn to understand your personality, i have a lot of aquarius in me and come out with crazy things too, and the sometimes just the shock on his face is enough to make me laugh, but he understands now that i dont mean any harm, just have a wacky half hour.
He wants to be your knight in shining armour, your protector, protect yu from the world and keep you safe, but they seem to think locking you away from everything is the way to do it. Explain to him how important your friends are to you, and that your prepared to compromise and make more time for him, and let him think he has won and he is the boss on certain issues, whenever we go out he has this issue about being the one to pay for everything, we have a joint bank account so its more about a pubic face thing, and normally id fight him on it, but its not that big an issue to let him carry the money, and in a sense he will make you feel like a princess …. he’s buying everything, getting you everything you want, and if your with friends too, he will always hover and keep a close eye to make sure your ok.
It can be very difficult in the beginning, but trust me it is more than worth it, they take a long time to trust but when they do, wow is the only word i can say, if you want a fairytale romance, and to feel like a princess, he is definately the one to do this.
Yes. You can see what sign am i.
He is a scorpio; totally one.
They are just simply selfish.
I dont daid it due to my hatred for them, but indeed i experienced through.
I advice every/ any one who is keen to have a relationship with them to stop that fantasy thought.
The way he dont even allows me to have guys friends. NOT EVEN ex-classmates.
Yet he can have all the reasons to mix around and persue his passion.
Well he dont know what is call love.
They only do what is good for them and never spare a thought to the person they CLAIMED to love!
Wow… Scorpio guy here… before you run just let me say I agree with you about scorpio men. We are EXTREMELY possessive and do have a tendency to want to “lock away” those people and things that we care about and love-at least, when talking about unevolved scorpio men. Do more research into the sign of scorpio and you will find that there are actually several different symbols for the scorpio. The most common are the Phoenix, Eagle, and Dove. The most powerful tool that a scorpio has (male or female) is transformation. When a scorpio decides to change something about him or herself, they act out in their lives something metaphorically akin to the legend of the phoenix. A phoenix will make its nest of flammable materials, lie down smack dab in the middle of it and set the whole thing ablaze, burning its nest and itself to ashes. However, as the legend continues, the phoenix will then be reborn from the ashes more splendid and far wiser than before.
I used to be the kind of scorpio male that all of you have been talking about. But somehow I stumbled across astrology (funny how things just “happen”) and found that my sign doesn’t have the greatest reputation amongst the others. At first, my stinger rose and my pincers tensed, ready to strike; but then something happened. I asked myself, “what if they’re right?” And after some classic scorpio alone time, where I spent my off hours examining myself and all of my life’s experiences, especially my actions and reactions within them, I found that these others were indeed correct. HUMILITY was one of the toughest things for this scorpio to learn. I used to fight to the “death” every battle, no matter how insignificant, even if I new I was wrong, just to win and prove my point. Now I completely despise any and all unnecessary drama, and I find that more often than not, people want to learn there own lessons through their own life experiences. It doesn’t matter one iota if I am right in telling them how a certain situation is most likely to play out quite different than they hope. They must walk down that path of lesson on their own to teach themselves the same wisdom. PATIENCE is definitely a virtue and I am learning that even if you know the answer to someone’s question, sometimes it is better to say, “I don’t know”, offer them a loving smile, and let them walk down the path to become their own teachers.
What I am tryin to say is that these scorpio men are spiritually and emotionally young. But once they learn to turn that analytical scorpion eye inward, and begin working on themselves with brutal honesty, you will be AWE-STRUCK at how far they will go. Its much like a train: takes forever to build momentum, but once it gets going, LOOK OUT!
There are general characteristics that all scorpios will display, such as the ones you have encountered. We get A LOT of bad press, which doesn’t help our situation much, but we are the sign of extremes. We can and are usually the worst of the worst, but we have the ability to become the best of the best.
I used to hate aquarians because the old me could never, and I mean NEVER, get one of you caught in my emo web ; ) But I have since learned that I need to learn detachment from my DEEPLY POWERFUL emotions in order to manage them appropriately… And guess who I am taking my observational lessons from? You guessed it, my aquarian friends. They have so much to teach me about this subject and I just can’t get enough. In return, I teach them the value of deeply felt emotions and how they can and do inspire oneself to attain the highest of heights and conquer mountains. But of course, as an aquarian, the desire to do so is completely up to you… : )
Don’t worry about the scorpio mood swings too much. That’s just part of the scorpio package and we know we’re moody. Just give us some space and check in once in a while to find out when we’re done processing and are ready to come back out into the world again. Oh, and don’t ever take a scorpios emotions for granted, no matter how out of place they may seem. Honor them and let the scorpio vent (try not to laugh). Later, when they calm down, you can both have a good ole chuckle at the hilarity of it all.
Much more I could say but I’ll leave it there… g2g. Peace my aquarian friends. Don’t rip me too hard!
WOW Really? Are we that bad? I like what this guy wrote I have something very similar written on my myspace page. Let me further elaborate, If you are dealing with a young/drug using scorpio you probably don’t want to further pursue that relatioship. UMMM Some body said something about scorpios and fire signs? I just happen to love leo women, and have experienced nothing but fairy tale romance, and legendary sex. Unfortunately things happened, not the right time I guess, but we are still friends, and when we look back on our relationships we have no problem admitting how great they were. The whole friends thing is crazy. You should find a scorpio MAN, and not a BOY. Thats the difference. I personally enjoy when my girl goes out, because it means I can hang with the guys, and do guy stuff. Guy friends are no problem, but I want to meet them. I think that’s just being respectful. Also we are men we know what men do and want. Men will be your friend for real, or they will be that snake in the grass that’s waiting for you to get in a fight, so they can be that shoulder to cry on.
I want to help you better understand scorpios. We understand how things work, we study life, we notice every thing, and hardly forget a word. Maybe it can be a problem because sometimes you tell a story and leave certain things out, and we hear that story again and those certain things come out, and then we are like “huh?, thats not what you told me before”.
The jealousy thing can get a lil crazy, but you have to find a scorpio that has come to terms with his weaknesses. I know my jealousy has cost me some great relationships in the past, but now i better understand life. I realize that if I want to have a great woman I have to be patient and understanding, and I can’t be selfish by burdening my lover with my own insecurities, But am I jealous? Yeah scorpios are machismo WE ARE MEN we get jealous… So what everyone gets jealous!!! We are less afraid to show it. I’m a jealous guy!!! If i see you flirting with another guy I’m going to walk over squeeze the crap out of his hand, and kiss you on the lips. Then I’ll walk away, but you better believe I’m going to let this guy know who I am lol and if he gets carried away I’ll let you handle it, but if you don’t you are just being disrespectful. Thats when I get jealous, and thats why to me it’s more of a respect issue.
I can tell you one thing though, not speaking for all scorpios just myself, i know your favorite movie, I know your favorite flowers, I know where to rub your back when you say it’s sore, I know your favorite candy, I know what makes you happy, and I know exactly what to do/say to make you smile when you are having a rough day, and if anybody messes with you i’ll handle it.
Next for those of yo whos man isn’t introducing you to his friends or family don’t pin that on scorpios. These are guys that are players, and they are playin you. If I’m with a woman I am definitely showing her off. We have egos and they are pretty big lol I want my friends to see you…. trust me… I’m showin you off…. to everybody and everyone like “yeah you like that, she’s with me”, I’m askin all my friends what they think, and I’m acting like i’m the man, and as long as you let me have that you can have whatever you want. I mean really I was reading comments about being treated like a princess, and honestly thats what i want you to feel like. She really hit the nail on the head. I study massage therapy, cooking, tantra, the art of listening, acupressure, you name it. If I knew you liked roses I would learn how to grow roses. Thats what a scorpio brings to the table, and yeah it’s intense.
Truth is if you are a young woman, and you are unsure about what you want, You definitely should not date a scorpio. Things have a way of spiraling out of control with us. One day it’s a casual fling the next day you’re talkin about marriage. I can’t say if it’s a scorpio thing or not, but I swear I have had those magical romantic moments that people spend there lives dreaming about, and I’ve spent whole nights laughing about the dumbest things ever.
Well i’m done now lol Just defending the scorpio name. I hope you can make it through my random stream of consciousness, and possibly make some sense out of it. nov,1,1981
Heh there everyone im an aquarius girl in a relationship with a scorpio man we have been in a relationship for about 8 months now. Everthing written here about scorpio men sounds so much like my guy he is very possessive but in a caring way and it feels nice to have someone want u that much. He is a private person but he needs to know everything about me he will even read my emails but wont let me see his but i dont mind because i have nothing to hide. He has met my family lots of times but didnt introduce me to his for a long time i practically asked him every day if i could meet his family. Since then i have nly met them a few times but he has introduced me to his friends and he does like to show me off. But i wudnt get too close to his friends beacuse he would get very jealous.
This relationship hasnt been the easiest because of his intensity of his emotions i like to think of this as him fighting with his emotions give him a minute to calm down and he will be back to normal again. Sometimes he thinks im crazy but thats just my aquarius personality and he looks at me as if im mad its hilarious!
I do love my scorpio man hes so passionate, caring and mysterious. His look is quite intense almost hypnotizing. He will look totally calm and composed but be careful as underneath this composure he could be ready to erupt so dont get on his bad side. When he loves you he will spoil you like a princess.
The love making is amazing he is always thinking about my pleasure and isnt afraid to try new positions. Scorpio rules the genitals so they have a strong sex drive.
I think our relationship works because i have scorpio rising in my sign and alot of my friends are also scorpios. I let him know if i think hes being too emotional or jealous. I think he has got used to me having lots of friends.
Good luck to any other aqua girls who are in a relationship with a scorpio
Hey I am an Aquarious in a relationship with a scorpio and have been for nearly a year now… although 1st 6 months we were just seeing each other – “not dating” was never allowed to be called this!!!
My scorpio does have these funny lil traits – not possesive or looking at my stuff or not allowing me to have friends or anything – as we trust each other so no need to be, but does have his own emotional things….. BUT hey so do I!
As an aquarian, I love attention so when a bloke isnt given me enogh, sometimes you have to wonder is it really not enough or is it I just need a ridiculously unnormal amount of attention sometimes, theres two people in a relationship and you so can not slate the men all the time, its a two person thing…. in fact back when we were jsut seeing each other… but not dating! I was just as bad as he was, if he saw his friends out and they made a comment about us, I would be the first person to announce that there was nothing going on with us EXCEPT friendship – mainly as I wanted to show my independance and the fact I didnt need him, secondly for pride in case he said it, if i didnt say it first…. so you wonder why these men have issues too!
Man reading all this and that’s me! I’m a scorpio and I have recently met this girl who’s a aquarius. After reading about the auqarius sign and I wonder can we even be in a relationship??
I was in a relationship with a aries and it was amazing but at the same time we argued alot, I do admit most of it was my fault, being controlling, playing mind games. I would hold things inside but when it got to the point I threw the emotions at her. And the sex, well that was simply amazing! We argue then instead of kiss and make up, it was sex and make up. lol
I know once I fall for a girl its all or nothing, I do take care of them but sometimes I think maybe that is what makes the other person push away because paying to much attention or putting them on a pedestal.
Anyways, any advise for a scorpio guy on dating a aquarius girl would be appreciated. I think my 5 year relationship with aries has taught me to try and be calm and not to get jealous for stupid reasons.
It’s hard but I’m learning.
oh tonnnyyyy – you should be hanging out on the “how to know a scorpio doesnt love you” thread on here. I know theres at least TWO of us aqua women going bananas over you scorps. Essentially what it seems to come down to is the weird and bizaare meeting the mysterious and disturbed. Hahaha. You can figure out which side is which.
im in love still with a married aquarius woman. She loves having romances still even when married.. Anwyay she fell into lust and daze over another guy and it bothers me..I need to realize she is married ..yet the fantasy and hot sex with her ugggghh would be sooo good .. I guess i want to get hit by lightning
Is there any other Aquarius woman out there who are married and dabble in romance and sex with other guy / friends / who are cool with that..
And or is there anyone who would definitley cross that. line..in fantasy