All Scorpios cheat. Scorpios never cheat.
March 21, 2008 by Jeffrey Kishner
An ongoing discussion in the comments section about Scorpios illuminates the wide variety of perceptions about this sign’s capacity for fidelity. Janis has “never met a scorpio that was truly faithful,” while Victoria says, “generally speaking Scorpio is a very faithful and loyal and devoted sign, if they are in love.”
I’m not going to take sides, because both readers speak to part of Scorpio’s truth. What interests me is that we all have strong beliefs about zodiac sign characteristics. And we don’t necessarily arrive at the whole truth of a sign by relying on observations. Certainly, the understanding we have acquired by studying the charts (or just Sun signs) of our friends and lovers is deeper than that which we would acquire from solely relying on the stereotypes offered in Sun sign books. But there is one significant problem with coming to astrological conclusions based on personal experience: They’re personal.
Most of us repeat relational patterns, such as attracting the same type of boyfriend again and again. Whether we ascribe this experience to a Freudian repetition compulsion or the complex associated with a challenging square, it doesn’t matter. What counts is that we develop a limited perspective from having been stuck in a repetitive cycle. If you keep shacking up with men who cheat on you and lie about it, you are obviously going to believe that men cheat. And if you keep shacking up with Scorpios who cheat on you and lie about it, you’re going to think all Scorpios cheat.
But it is just not the case that all Scorpios cheat. Rather, the Scorpios you attract cheat on you. It’s your chart — meaning that your experience with others is a reflection of your own astrological patterns. Maybe your 7th house ruler is in Scorpio, in aspect to Neptune or in your 12th House. Until you become conscious of this pattern and find alternate ways for the planet to express itself, you may continue drawing deceptive lovers into your life.
Psychotherapists call this a “frame.” Imagine you have a picture frame, and you can only see the world from within its four walls. Think of everything that’s blocked out!
Even professional astrologers work from within a frame. Read any two interpretations of the same natal chart, and you’ll see what I mean. Neither is necessarily more true than the other. But by virtue of being limited human beings with our own beautiful, unique experiences, we all see charts (and the humans they “capture”) differently.
The wonderful thing about the dialogues that occur on this blog is that we get to see widely divergent belief systems about different zodiac signs. It levels the playing field. We get to see that our ideas are just that — ours. When we read opposing views, it gives us an opportunity to wonder: Why do I see Scorpios this way? Not to judge ourselves, but just to be curious.
Comment below: How has reading the comments section led to a change in your understanding of astrology?
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I agree, it’s best to hear others experience to have that tangible, real life experience. While not always the case, I do see lots of women (and men) who end up re-living the same bad relationship over and over again…it was awesome to hear the psychological explanation. I sympathize for those people, because I can only imagine having to figure out what needs to change inside for your lovers to change can be quite the difficult.
LOL!! Glad you caught this too Jeffrey and tried to put some kind of explanation to it…
the thread was starting to read something like “all scorpios never always cheat all some of the time”
i personally think anyone is capable of cheating given the right circumstances…it just depends on our past experiences, motivations, etc whether we choose to do it or not… and for anyone to make a general statement for this or any sunsign..is far too gross a generalization!!
I am a Capricorn woman who once was deeply in love with a Scorpio guy, who loved me back…but here is the kicker…..he flirted relentlessly with other girls, even in front of me…& his ‘logic’ (if u can call it that) was that I was the only one he truly loved & he was just having ‘harmless fun’ with other girls..I was supposed to understand that, which I did. I never doubted the authenticity of he feelings towards me..they were as genuine as is humanly possible, but it was too painful to watch him with other girls, so I broke up with him…oh BTW, I wasn’t supposed to even accidently give another guy a second glance..he used to burn with jealousy if I had even an innocent conversation with another guy that went beyond 2 minutes..so I don’t know if this behavior is explained by his chart or mine or a combination of both, but I thought I’ll share it here. He truly was the one I loved, I have never experienced that intensity with anyone else ever again, but I could not put up with his behavior…I had to stand up for myself.
Jeffrey,it’s me proserpine. you’re speaking much more to mature issues lately.
I like it much better.
You know having said that–I almost sdon’t want to add anyhtng about perceptions of people’s Sun signs as you stated the more important piece we should be thinking about.
However, don’t you find that if one has lived a while, met a lot of people worked with a lot of people,or had lots of lovers or friends, one begins to see patterns.
While at first i had some idea about some Sun signs, maybe when I was 15 some was foolish.But I learned more–yes, from reading, but more from-living and experiencing.
Of course no one sign always does a certain ting–it’s just that certian triats pop up more.
Know what I mean?
Jeffrey,it’s me proserpine. you’re speaking much more to mature issues lately.
I like it much better.
You know having said that–I almost don’t want to add anyhtng about perceptions of people’s Sun signs as you stated the more important piece we should be thinking about.
However, don’t you find that if one has lived a while, met a lot of people worked with a lot of people,and/or had lots of lovers or friends, one begins to see patterns?
While at first i had some idea about some Sun signs when I was 15much I thought was foolish.I sensed things, but didn’t really know anyhting.But I learned more–yes, from reading, but more from-living and experiencing.
Of course no one sign always does a certain thing–it’s just that certain traits pop up more.
Know what I mean?
Interesting.
@ Karen…I totally agree with the way you explained the more you meet people, the more patterns emerge. Love it!!
I think the trick is to use the information you have while not disregarding new information. People tend to box in their data too much.
If you roll a die six times, your not going to get all six numbers one time, even if you performed that task 1000 times..you would only be getting closer to what you already know your odds truly are.
Looks like that woman has a 50-50 chance of him cheating on her. Psychology, Astrology, Tight Pants and Fancy Lingerie may increase her chances of keeping a man faithful, but what people really want from this knowledge is control.
Last I checked I don’t have too much control over anything past my nose.
I think hedge bets are for the weak, and in a relationship setting prove quite destructive to your mental health as well.
Henry Clay said “Statistics are no substitute for judgment” and I believe that, I really do.
@Karen, I know what you mean. I’m just saying most of us spout off these statements as if they’re objective, when none of us are God. And as angelineelise writes, it’s all too easy to disregard the data that doesn’t fit with one’s theory.
Jeffrey, Oh yes, agreed.:-)Absolutely true.
Keeping an open mind is very important, and I still have to remind myself that even while I think I know that, if you know what I mean :-p.
Sometimes even more now although Iknow it more, I also know more–so, it becomes easy to start to geralize of assume once again, LOL.
Tyhnak you Angeline!I think btw, that we may have something(s) in common…just a feeling.
I have Venus in Scorpio and I can tell you I am incapable of cheating if I have made a commitment. Now, that being said…I am a flirt. That’s just my nature. And if you hurt me…all bets are off. I won’t just ‘get even,’ I’ll go you ten better
is that Scorpio… ? or something else… slight deviant smile…
I have Venus in Scorpio and I can tell you I am incapable of cheating if I have made a commitment. Now, that being said…I am a flirt. That’s just my nature. And if you hurt me…all bets are off. I won’t just ‘get even,’ I’ll go you ten better
is that Scorpio… ? or something else… slight deviant smile…
My understanding of astrology was one of “fun scepticism” until I had the very common problem of dating a Scorpio. A passing comment from a friend put me onto researching which is how I ended up here, so I suppose reading the comments it has made me think more deeply about astrology and I just wish I knew more. However, I also go along with what Jeffery says about personal experiences developing your perception on a particular sign , and that there is maybe the ability to cheat in all of us to some degree.My experience of Scorpio boyfriend is 100% loyalty and trust towards me. I also have a Scorpio girl friend who is also loyal, and maybe a touch self-centred.But,personaly, I attract that type of friend, and particularly look for that in guys that I have dated.
ok i need help with my husband and my chart..we are both scorpio sun..my moon is capricorn, his moon is aries..my mercury is scorpio and his is libra..my venus scorpio and his venus sag..what the heck?!?!
I agree with ashley. Anyone can cheat. I always thought I was fiercely loyal in all relationships until I realized I had a crush on another guy outside my most recent relationship. We ended up hooking up, but stopped short of having intercourse. I guess I was loyal enough to not have sex, but not loyal enough to stop my self from kissing a lot. So it’s all good until you find out you want to have your cake and eat it too. The worst thing is, if I could go back in time, I’m thinking I would’ve just had sex with the guy. Scorpio loyalty. . . go figure.
Scorpios cheat when they are in a relationship just for sex. They are attracted to your body and the things that you do with it but have no interest in your mind and how you tick. They have an urge to seek out that companionship of mind that they are not getting from you. Or vice a versa, they are in love with your mind but you are not into them as sexually as they are you and they hear “no” more often than “yes”. Scorpios cheat because they live life to the fullest and want what they want and will get it from one or two mates although they tend to shy away from one when they find another since they put everything into the relationship that gives them the most of what they want. That is why many will go from one to the next without having a space in between (unless they are dumped). That is why I have come to the conclusion of why I did for so many years. It is because they are not truly in love with you. What sucks for me is that I developed a reputation for that and when I did find someone that was perfect in both mind and sex, I lost them because they think I cheated when I did not. And since I am naturally evasive and reserved they thought I would eventually leave them for someone else since I kept my feelings to myself and they did it first. Obviously my natural “uncontrollable” reaction to that was to attack ferociously to them and now I have lost them for a long time and have to wait patiently and be kind to them until they come back, if they do (which I know they will since I have noticed that no matter what, that attraction never goes away they are just scared of the sting. Which I am bound and determined to do, since that is also the way I am. It’s not personal when we do it and we do care, just not enough not to usually. You only live once. WHEN and ONLY WHEN a scorpio is truly in love will they be faithful. Any other time, it’s just fun and games and you are being used to get what they need at that time. I bet that sounds evil to most but I don’t care it’s how I tick.
@ Anonymous March 21,
Hey, I totally now what u put up with because of my recent ex boyfriend, I broke up with him because of the same reason, I hated the way he seemed to flirt with all the girls. I’m a scorpio myself and so is my ex boyfriend, we are both number eight scorpios, and we are highly attached to each other. If he trulys love you then you will know because my ex boyfriend still comes back to me even thorugh he has a girlfriend…Which makes me wonder
LOL Scorpios attract cheat –,) I think whatever the sign is, people have the tendency to cheat not just Scorpios..
Scorpio women arent wreckless cheats.
There are reasons why they do cheat – go guys take note:
1) They may be dominated & restricted by you from accomplishing things that may be of benefit (i.e. career path)
2) Sex life has gone horribly wrong (e.g. no sex involved or you dont happen to be very creative in bed – this isnt to say you should act dirty because Scorpion women are passionate in sex in a non-slutty way of course)
3) You may be the one that delays, or may not want children at this time. Youre too busy focusing on your career or hanging about with your mates.
4) You are not a very sharing person. Shes your partner, so share things with her (e.g. meals together & outings) However thats not to say you should share your secrets. Maintain your mysterious nature. If youre a Gemini – no chance as you give too much away for her to get bored.
I am a Scorpio. I have cheated. I have been cheated on (sorta) and I have been the “other woman.” A little taste of everything, However….I have spent most of my time doing the cheating. For a long time I wasn’t sure why I did it. I have immense passionate and honest love for the men i was with. It had nothing to do with my love for them. It had nothing to do with my womanly insecurities. It had nothing to do with them.
I realized that the reason I cheated was because I was vulnerable. Us scorpios, we love so hard…with every ounce of our being…in love we lose our power. This person (although they rarely know it) has complete and utter power over. they can hurt us like no other soul on this planet ever can. We have given them all. We have given them our mind, our heart, our body, our spirit, our power….we are exposed.
The cheating came fromt he fear. I almost felt that i neede to ruin the relationship. they say scorpions when cornered would rather sting themselves to death rather than allow their opponent to take their life. It is in this same sense. If i ever found out he was with another, he didnt love me, i wasn’t good enough…I would rather sacrifice myself than have the one i love do it to me. Its a very selfish act. We cheat to regain our power. Its our curse.
Scorp guys always say that they never ever cheat, but in fact they do cheat without blinking an eye. And when they do it, they start to blame you for no reason. Sex is one thing they cannot resist.
And another stupid thing about Scorps. If you cheat on him and tell him, you’re guilty; but if he cheats on you and tell it to you, he’s innocent. The reason? He’s being frank to you, and how can he trust you if you’re not telling him the truth??? Playing mind games with you as usual, needless conversations etc etc.
Tip of the day- Cheat on a Scorp
Ah my mistake
Edit: If you cheat on him and “not” tell him, you’re guilty; but if he cheats on you and tell it to you, he’s innocent.
Scorpio men are insecure and like power, it is a leathal attraction for them, they flirt with women to cover there insecurity and for the power involved.
They do cheat repeatedly but only if they either have no connection to you, or you surrender yourself to them. If you remain strong and they love you they are the most faithful person you will ever meet.
As a Scorpio female I have to admit I have cheated, and almost all of my Scorpio friends I have are cheaters, players whatever you want to call them. Maybe I just hang around with a******s I don’t know.
BUT the one way I have noticed is Scorpio’s will not cheat if they are completely in love and they are getting exactly what they want.
As far as I am aware, I have never been cheated on aside from the 3 Scorpio men I dated/married – all CHEATERS!!! Relentless, continuous, unabashed cheating. They demonstrated zero ability to think 5 minutes ahead and the constant juggling and deceit would exhaust the normal human. I am extremely attractive, very generous, totally trusting, and I’m no dumbass (aside from trusting these monsters). Their reasons for cheating were all the same and very simple. They could. I married two of these Scorpios and caught them both in bed with the most disgusting characters you can imagine…many MANY times. Unbelievable. Do yourself a favor…RUN – FAST AND NEVER LOOK BACK.
After reading all that I’ve come to the conclusion: Scorpios think they cheat (if and when they do) because they set standards that are high and their partners are not reaching it. I kind of understand how that works but I need to provide some alternative point of view: You can’t say that you cheat because no one else understands how you love! Physical and emotional connection – if those are not forthcoming in a relationship, isn’t it time to call quits or to change something in yourself and your partner? Cheating is just what it is: Cheating.
I am a Scorpio guy. I will have no problem “cheating” if the girl I’m with is not completely into it. I don’t consider it “cheating” because the girl doesn’t really belong to me, and I don’t belong to her. It’s either real love or just good times.
@jon the question is…how do you tell the difference or distiguish between real love or just good times? I’m not being fecicious, just genuinely curious for my own selfish reasons.
thecountess: I don’t have a list of criteria per se. It’s just a deep intuition based on observations of the girl’s words and actions over a period of time – especially in terms of their dealings with other guys and what they said to me or to other people about the nature and outlook of our relationship. If they come out and utter the L word, then I accept that at face value. I admire the honesty and I appreciate that very much, in fact I will always treasure it even if it turns out there is no future for us. But if I sense that that something isn’t there, then I don’t hang around and wait for the ax to fall, if you know what I mean…
We are prone to cheat if the sex isnt’t good, or your stupid. or we think you are.
@jon – thanks for the feedback. being an aquarius myself, i’m not particularly fearful of or concerned with cheating. To me, there are worse things that could happen. However since Ive been seeing a scorp for about a year and half now, I was curious as to the criteria (which you DID kind of explain lol) of that which is love and that which is just something to pass the time. Strangely enuf I finally got the balls to utter the deadly L word after all this time with my scorp and it was prompted due to a falling out we had. Sent him a heartfelt email and finally confessed it. Hope he feels the same way you do and cherishes it for what it was. I know he knows it wasnt easy for me but i do hope he knows it was genuine. Thanks again for the quick response and feedback. You scorps are most interesting.
I find this thread very interesting. I dated a Scorpio and he asked me a lot about how my previous relationships ended. Who did what to whom and how and when and all that. At first I said it was none of his business but then I told him, and he kept asking for more details. I asked him why. He said ‘history repeats itself’ and he wanted to know so he can plan ahead
I think this was the very moment when he made a decision to start cheating on me, because a fixed sign is not open to change, and he had this thought in his
head that I could never change and I would never change.
So the lesson is: If you date a Scorpio, do not ever ever tell him the whole story. Do not ever tell him anything negative about yourself or anything negative you did. I know it’s tricky because they are very good at finding out – I don’t know how – and you end up telling them everything about you and you still don’t know anything about them. How do they do that?????? (Sigh)
I don’t know for sure but i would say, yes don’t portray yourself as negative in any light because if you thats the picture you’re painting that’s the picture they will believe. HOWEVER, they do seem to be intrigued by admitence of human fault if you also paint the story of how you transcended because of it and are now a much stronger better wiser person because of it there for not weak like other lesser mortals, lol. Really i think with them its just a matter of spin.
Also being a fixed sign myself (altho all the fixed signs have their own way of going about it), the trick is…don’t obviously try to change our minds. Simply present the facts (with scorps the more subtle the better) and we’ll change our minds on our own if it makes sense to us. In fact in my experience with my scorp, me being an aqua, us both being fixed, I just tell him flat up, this is how I see it and this is why and theres nothing more to it and I don’t care care if he agrees or not. Nine times out of ten, a few days, a few weeks, a few months later…he agrees.
You brought up a great observation. As a Scorpio, I pretty much know when people are lying to me. I know everyone has faults and makes mistakes, and everyone has an imperfect past. But if someone pretends they’re perfect and life is all hunky-dory, well, I know that’s just impossible. I believe this is a tendency among certain signs. Better to get it all out than to waste time playing silly games.
Well I’ve never been involved with a scorpio before but after last night I decided to so some digging on this sign. Now I’m not saying they ALL cheat cos I’ve only known 2 as friends (so wouldn’t ask that question) and 1 as more.
Now last night I went with a guy who i KNOW has a boyfriend, ok yes i shouldn’t have but we’ve been friends for years and always flirted and had sexual tension. so last night we had sex at his flat and I asked if he felt guilty, cos I did (still do) and he just shrugged and said nope. I didn’t know a sign could cheat so easily! But gosh maybe it’s their programming? I’m a cancer btw.
well I learnt a lesson, I personally will NEVER date a scorpio.
virgos are the men for me lol
@adam – scorpios most definately cheat. but only if they have reason to. but unfortunately that reason could be they aren’t TRUELY committed to you. Also scorpio is the sign of extremes so i personally think its kinda like the title of this thread.
Some scorpios always cheat. And some scorpios never cheat.
jut gotta get on the right side of that coin.
also ps: some guys are just man whores. lol
Now im dissapointed in my own sign. (Why must i be a wiser). Never cheated and i never want to. Never will. I know who i am and have decided these things. So what i’m one a few scorpios who have never cheated. So annoyed well rather dissappointed. So the past repeats you know wer supposed to learn from it right. I myself have a constant battle with sriving to do whats right in any way. I want to learn and become so much more. But to be more is to be misundrstood i dont think i want to go any higher now. So this begs a question ive been thinking why am i being so good when the worlds full of such disohnesty and petty feelings. Domiated by sex lies and greed. Sure there fun at the time but later not so much. So if the past repeats itself then thatll be interesting to see how it plays out. I oner if i should stop it this time…
Dont feel so bad Libra are always called cheaters, even though we dont cheat often LOL
All signs have people who cheat and those who dont…..
sorry i guss i dont like the idea of my scorpio cheating or even me. I want her to myself and that is the only time im greedy. I see he as so much more that could be a problem..
I’ve never had anyone cheat on me, I did find out I was the “other” woman once and ended things before things got physical. I think that we all fear that the one we love will cheat, its never happened to me but I still worry about it, I think thats everyone….Everyone worries about that. Your Scorpio Girl wont cheat if she loves you, but the thing is if you are a “friend” and that means just friend with someone that isnt cheating either, Ive been called cheater because one “friend only” found out about the other “friend” and that is really sick. As far as physical or emotional cheating though, it would drive me crazy….
I havent met any scorpios that cheated in a relationship, but lots that played the field, if your not in serious relationships it isnt cheating, dating is just dating, but what Ive seen in many Scorpio freinds was that once they met the guy they really liked, they stopped seeing other guys
I need some advice
i mean not full on sex but definitley kissing etc. and god im dying for that from him
I have this friend whos a scorpio and he is SO gorgeous and just my type! i met him through my best friend and i felt an instant connection and we always laughed together…but thing is he will only meet me if my friend is there too, never on my own.
but god i want 2 meet him on my own – cos i think i know stuff could happen!
but thing is he’s just moved house and his excuse is ‘im so busy with moving etc’ but i REALLY want him to meet me. I could swear he’s interested cos he sends flirty txts/pics etc….but how can i get him 2 meet up with me?
he sends mixed messages but has said he likes me and how im ‘gorgeous’
so suggesstions please? how 2 get him 2 stop being scared and make a move with me and meet me….
Never cheat, just leave.
i favor scorpio stars method thanky you though i think you should try to work it out i have a habit of trying everything to rise it all up and see how far back i can get it.