Kids are total sponges for stress. They lack the mental filters and defense mechanisms that we use to delude ourselves into accepting a version of reality that simply doesn’t exist. They absorb what we feel but will not say or admit and it makes a difference in their health, sleep patterns, appetite, mood, and general world outlook.

They’re taught, in other words, to believe in the emotional nutritional value of living a lie.

Look around. There are exceptions, to be sure, but a great deal of the time, we live in a world of emotionally walking wounded who never learned another way.

If push comes to shove, your daughter will think all the more of you in the long run, despite any short-term pain. Showing her that you have the courage not to settle for anything else than what you feel you deserve gives her a priceless role model that she’ll never forget.

And a sense of joy that’s grounded in truth.

Be strong. Be cool. Be kind to yourself.

That was very cool. Very very cool. Between you, Yamazaru the guy with the brilliant military strategy to outmanouver the Sun signs, and Jeffrey of course, this is a goldmine of writing talent.

Please attach your identity of choice so that you get some credit for your hard work! Compile it and send it in to a publishing company and don’t hesitate; people will devour it. I’m a fussy reader and loathe not being able to read an article through with ease . . . it has to be art in writing. My Venus in Virgo will settle for nothing less.

Your work is art in writing, and paints a picture, and this talent is rare.

I sometimes think that my Virgo is analyzing something, but he never, and I mean NEVER, brings the subject up again (I think somehow uranus got ahold of him and he is too laid back about everything and could join a group for Peace and Love and become a hippy – if there was such a thing for perfectly dressed and perfectly clean and neat tennis coaches to do this) (Oh – I just had to create a laugh for myself – this last statement has brought me great humor?!!)

I need hip-waders, slosh through all the estrogen here. I had no idea so much of this site was like the latest episode of Hand Me a Hanky. At the same time, I can’t help but recognize how better equipped–in some ways–women are at handling heartache. You have the great, good sense to talk it out. With few exceptions, the men I know bottle it up like a vintage not to be uncorked till 2012. If then.

I know there are guys who can relate to this, and not just fellow Scorps. I’ve played sports since grade school; all of them, including bike racing and martial arts–which I suppose really isn’t a sport. Add construction work and fire fighting during student summers, and you get the point. I spend a lot of time with manly men doing manly things, as a Goat girl once deadpanned.

To my lifelong gratitude, I was taught to balance this sensibility. Or, better–how to honor it by balancing it with other qualities rightfully mine. It’s a never-ending lesson.

I’ve had the great, good fortune to have a Pisces mom who put up with my god-awful temper and even puts in a word if she likes a girl I bring home, basically advising her not to take any s*** if she’s seriously after my affection. Good advice not easily followed. I’ve also had several girlfriends who endured my moodiness, occasional bloodletting, and a good deal of the brooding bulls*** that sometimes dangles from my neck like the ancient mariner’s albatross. These women were loving and patient enough to teach me how to be a better version of myself, how to hang sword and bow at the door, slip off the mask, and see that doing so not only makes me stronger, it enhances the mystery.

I even have one of them proofing this (while I cooked breakfast, thank you). I asked her if she stuck around last night only for the sex. Once the hysterical laughter died down (she’s still giggling), she said that if anyone thinks that’s why she puts up with me, they don’t spend enough time in front of a mirror, getting to know the woman behind the face du jour. There’s no substitute for self-knowledge, including true love, which likely won’t arrive first.

So I say, try this: tell the guy to grow a pair and open up. There’s a difference between toughness and strength, and he needs the latter if he wants you to continually choose his company. As in, period.

Then let him figure it out. This isn’t brain surgery. It’s building strength through vulnerability. Believe me, chances are he gets it. We’re not clueless.

Well, sometimes.

Maybe.

Depending, okay? The question is whether we’ve got the cojones to act on what you say.

Equally important, trust your gut for a change. It never ceases to amaze how many women won’t. If it feels like it’s going nowhere, you’re probably right. Just walk away, Renee. Even if it means the bed’s too big for awhile. At least you’ll have a chance to better know yourself, and what you claim in that process belongs to you. No one can take it away, and it’s shared only by choice. Which enhances the flavor, trust me.

How cool is that?

. . . Ahh, I gotta go.

Your sexual attractions are reflected by your Mars. Mars is what you want to *uck. Even if you can’t.