I’m beginning to fall for a Cap man myself. He’s not new…. only that we reconnected in July of this year after having not spoken for years. This is what I feel our relationship is like: short periods then periods of long absence. I met him in 2002 when we were really young (early twenties) and reconnected AGAIN (we’re 28 and 30 now…) Back in the day when we met I had isues with a guy I was seeing in the military… the man who did a number on me, and then married someone else. I met my Cap on one of those off periods wit the military guy… and we kept seeing each other over the years. In 2005, we got together for two weeks but I commenced arguing with him because I hardly saw him. I deleted his number. In December/January of this year we connected through facebook… he found me… and then I called him in July… we caught up, talked about getting older, and reminisced… then he started touching me… I said that if we were going to do it this time, we’d have to do it for real… m,eaning a relationship… he seemed to be on the same page… we kissed, which with him is always amazing and started necking. He came back the next day.. saw me.. said I looked scrumptious and said he missed me. I was like ‘already?” He spent the night, the said he had to go to the barbershop and said he’d call me later. When it got to about 7 pm, and I hadn’t heard from, I called him. He said he had gotten caught up with something for his mom at home. Oh, and he told me he is helping out his mom and some others financially right now. Then I didn’t see him for two weeks. Finally, on a Sunday he came to me… and whenhe did he had explained he needed to be away from home… that he came to me because I had said I could make him feel better and he had said he was going to give it a try. I was hurt b/c I hadn’t seen him in forever and I said, “Yeah, that was when I cared.” He made a motion to get off from the sofa and said he’d call his cousin. I said, “Stop being silly,” pushed him back on the sofa and straddled him. I then came clean to him. Before I had called him in July, I was trying the online dating ting and had gone on dates with two guys that went well enough for a second date. The second dates had been scheduled, and since my Cap wasn’t coming to see me and under guidance of my roomie, I went on those dates but found myself thinking about HIM so I knew I had to cut hose boys loose who were maybes even without him. I broke down crying telling him, that dating was a liberating experience and an empowering one b/c I got to make the choices. I’m really a serial monogamist at heart. I told him that these men call me and court me and it hurts when he doesn’t. He has said things like, “You’re a 10+ but I’m not going to jump through hoops for you.” I told him I had ended it with those guys because of my feelings for him. I didn’t even kiss those men on the second dates! I asked him if it would bother him if I were to continue, he said “Possibly.” Jokingly, I got off his lap and said, “Well, until that answer is a “yes” I’m going to continue.” Of course he knew I didn’t mean it. He was laughing at my retort. And I knew his “possibly” was the closest to a “yes” I was going to get. We’ve argued about him being slow to open up. And as time wore on, his first job at Dish Network went into transition where they are taking over the East Coast. That coupled with his UPS early hours job started killing his time. I t got to the point where he would call around midnight or 1 am and fall asleep on me on every phone convo. So I knew he was working hard. But resentment was building in me because I couldn’t see him… our convos were turning into hour long debates and arguments. He would say things like he wouldn’t spend th night with me on a day he had work the next morning… and I would be like why not? We hardly see each other! Why not make the concession? I asked him when I was going to see him again. He said he didn’t know and that if he knew, he would tell me. I asked him if I was going to see him before the New Year, and he said yes. I was like how can you tell me that but not tell me when it’s going to be over (the transition?( He said , “I don’t think it’s going to take until January.” So weeks turned into 6 weeks!!!! And though we spoke every day… which became every other day, then every two days…. I became more hurt. One last Thursday in the middle of September he stopped calling entirely. In that convo, he became aggravated and asked me why I turned every convo negative with my questioning. I also asked him if he was seeing someone else. He said no. I believe him. He keeps telling me he wants to see me… I’m like… so why aren’t yo here? Well, I haven’t heard from him since. I just recent activity on facebook on his profile where he is commenting to other people. I have called him, and last week I sent him a poem I wrote about us. I feel uncomfortable dialing his digits. I really want a real go with this guy. I am really upset. Because he stopped calling without any explanation? We were having resentful convos prior to the last convo, so I’m really confused. Any advice on what he might be thinking or what he wants? I’m remaining faithful to him despite the offers that have come my way. I want to wait it out with this guy…