Scorpio woman and super-sensitive Cancer man
October 31, 2007 by Jeffrey Kishner
Tasha included a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,ok im a scorpio female and my boyfriend is a cancer.i feel that we are soul mates, i just love him so much. well the problem is he just tends to always get hurt by the things i say…even when im just joking wit him, he’ll leave the room and give me the slient treatment for a minute until i go after him and make him talk to me, but then when he finally do talk, he starts cryin and letting out all this emotion.
and im like :” where is all this coming from? ” i mean this is a all the time type thing…. sometimes i have to kiss him and show alot of affection to get him to open up. anyway my question is
is there any way that i can get him to toughen up ? ? ? all that sensitive gots to go. i thought cancers were like there sign, hard on the outside, soft on the inside.
Your Cancer is a double Cancer, with both his Sun and Moon in this sensitive sign. “Hard on the outside” has different manifestations: for him, it’s leaving the room and giving you the silent treatment, i.e., retreating into his shell. It is only when you seek him out that the softness comes out.
You cannot get him to toughen up. He is who he is. Better to focus on what you say that makes him feel hurt. You are extremely Scorpionic: Scorpio Rising, a Mercury-Saturn conjunction in Scorpio, and a Sun-Pluto conjunction in Scorpio. You may have a tendency to shoot verbal barbs laced with criticism and judgment. In addition, your Sun-Pluto conjunction in the 12th House suggests that you are not conscious of how you wield this intense power you have to expose people’s weaknesses. What kind of defense can a crab shell provide against a Sun-Pluto conjunction in Scorpio? It’s like you are in a possession of a nuclear bomb, and you don’t know how to use it.
Your boyfriend also doesn’t have it easy. His Sun-Moon conjunction in Cancer is opposed by Mars — he is prone to experiencing anger coming from outside of himself, and directed at him. It is possible that he has projected his Mars onto you (remember that Mars is the traditional ruler of Scorpio), ‘making’ you more likely to take on the role of the aggressor.
Comment below to provide Tasha feedback.
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It would be nice to see his chart.
max
['Otherwise, not much to say.']
I’m only just now loosening up my ethics re: commenting on a third party’s chart, but the Cancer didn’t ask the question, so I don’t feel comfortable posting his chart.
oh wow, that was right on the money. im very impressed. it sounded just like me and my boyfriend. im kinda still in shock lol
When you’ve got both personalities in the same skin it’s a push-me-pull-you existence. Testy at the best of times.
Apple pie with open arms in the afternoon and out for blood after midnight. Depends who you’re dealing with of course. Water shapes itself to the environment.
Tasha-I am a scorpio woman who recently dated a cancer man–its true-he is who he is..u cant “toughen him up”…u should already kno that scorpio & cancer r emotinal water signs..and that cancer is the sign in need of most affection…believe me my man was a softy, too…but I liked it-I deal with enuff “tough guys”
I am married to a Cancer man for about 3 months..and whereas he is very loving and nurturing he is also very closed or close within as far as opening up and letting “others in” he is starting to be more open with me as time passed..butleaving the room and closing down is his speciality when issues are too difficult for him or whatever..or he hangs up the phone when somethingis said that he choses not to hear or discuss….at this juncture I wish I did not make the step into marriage
I am a Cancer guy (Mars in Saggitarius/Venus in Gemini) in love with a great Scorpio woman. We both seem to bear out our zodiac and compatibility profiles, the good and the bad! Instead of toughening up the Cancer guy, I’d advise the Scorpio-Cancer couple to bond enough so that the Cancer guy feels secure enough in the relationship to withstand Scorpio’s sharp tongue during arguments. Cancers and Scorpios bond well as water signs. Cancers hide in their shells when hurt, but Scorpios hide in secrecy. So, if Cancers should work on not retreating from conflict, Scorpios should work on opening up more. That way, mutual understanding between the two signs will prevent arguments arising from misunderstsandings that triggered insecurities. One more point of interest: while Cancerians aren’t known for adept verbal communication, my Mars in Sagittarius gives me the boldness, bluntness and verbal, crusading zeal and mental agility to hold my own in arguments and keep an intense Scorpio at bay. Also, my Venus in Gemini gives me inexhaustible zest and zeal for verbal communication that drives me to get to the heart of a lover’s quarrel with my passionate Scorpio babe who could argue with the best of lawyers!
Finally, Cancerian knack for great memory aids in these debates, too, when you want to catch a Scorpio contradicting themself! All that said, I wouldn’t part with my beautiful, passionate, exciting and intelligent, loving Scorpio for ANYTHING. Scorpios rock!!!
While Scorpios can be very intense and sharp-tongued in arguments, they appreciate honesty! Ignoring real issues or feelings may only anger a Scorpio more. But, if the Cancer is honest and not afraid to express discontent or fair criticism, Scorpio will respect Cancer more and find more credibility in Cancer’s viewpoint. Cancers should remember that Scorpios are committed to relationships and even when Scorpio is on the warpath in an argument, they aren’t likely to want to end the relationship too quick; Scorpios want to work things out. Maybe that’s tied to Scorpio possessiveness. So, Cancers, rely on that possessiveness to make you comfortable standing up for yourself in arguments, so that the 2 of you can get to the bottom of the problem and move on with your passionate and powerful Scorpio-Cancer relationship!
I’m a scorpio woman and i use to be with a cancer man and it definitely did not work out. We like a man to stand proud and tall and Cancers, are extremely sensitive and moody for our liking. I don’t think a scorpio woman and a cancer man work out.
anyone doubting whether scorpio and cancer can be a great match should go to: http://www.astrologycom.com/astromatch/match.php
BTW, I am a cancer guy in a serious relationship with a scorpio woman and our experience has mirrored the astrologycom.com profile for us, so yes, this match-up can work very well!
I am a scorpio woman (rising cancer, taurus moon, venus in virgo) and I had the same experience with my ex- boyfriend who was a cancer with a virgo moon. We were very drawn to eachother, but I would get easily frustrated with either him being too emotionally unavailable, or too sensitive. He gave me too much power in the relationship. He practically put on a collar and handed me the end of the leash, metaphorically speaking. I accidentally slipped into the role of being like his mom. Then when I felt like he wasn’t opening up enough, I would then have to help/force him to dig some skeletons out of his closet, and then be there to help calm the emotional mess he would become. It became too much, even for a control freak like me. I wanted him to take the reigns for once, which when I told him that, he just gave me this confused, helpless look. That’s cute the first couple of times, but not when you are tired of doing all of the work in the relationship from the very start. I had to come up with all the ideas for our dates and arrange the details. I just wanted to sit back and relax for once, and see if he could show me a good time…but unfortunately, after giving him more opportunities than I should have, he never stepped up. Maybe he saw that I was too critical, and he was afraid anything he would try wouldn’t measure up to my “high standards.” I tried my best to show him that I am more loving and accepting than I appear.
There’s something so sweet and securing about a cancer man that I can’t seem resist when I’m in the mood for a relationship.
The scorpio sun / cancer moon in me says OH PLEASE YES, but … my venus in sagittarius says otherwise
I am an Aries, moon in Sag, Aries rising, mars in Cancer and Venus in Pisces. I am such a sucker for Cancer men. There is one I am dating now. He was really hurt by a fellow Aries who cheat on him five months before their wedding date. It has made him emotionally unavailable and he is very untrusting. I don’t know why I am so over this guy, because really, I am most compatible with Leo men. The relationship is effortless. I put so much effort into being with the Cancer. I think it could be the challenge. Aries LOVE a challenge. Does anyone have any idea why I am wanting to have a difficult relationship, instead of being with someone more compatible?
Melanie, maybe his ex-fiancee cheated because he was emotionally unavailable and untrusting. :-/ I have a thing for Cancerians, too, at least initially, but I’m noticing that they’re not resilient at all, and I have a LOT of “bounce back” from hurts. My idea of a good time is NOT sulking, silence, moody atmospheres and trying to persuade someone to be with me. NO THANKS!
I am a female saggitarius sun, scorpio moon, libra rising, I have experienced the wildside of passion with a cancer man,incredible!
I am a male cancer with gemini rising, virgo moon, merc & venus in cancer.
I must say, my experiences with scorpios have all been more than negative. When put in the same room together with a scorpio man there is always trouble, what starts with an intense stare-down competition, can quickly escalate to violence.
As far as scorpio women, i tend to run from them, far and fast (they seem to cold, superficial, and un-artistic). I am not fond of pisces or cancer women as well… Weird?
My dating history consists of me either getting dumped or dumping aquarians and geminis.. i am horribly attracted to these two.
Could this be because of my gemini rising?
p.s. I own a shirt with the sign of scorpio crossed out
yea…being a scorpio moon woman…i hate the fact that we scorpios have to take the initiative and leadership to deal with the emotional problems of the Cancer moon men. And i do agree that we Scorpio moon women can hurt the soft Cancer men. We act on our anger and the cancer men dont fight back or even talk about the problem unless u bring it up. They just quietly go away or ignore us until we have to confront them. Has this happened to anyone else?
I’m a cancer man dating a scorpio women. All I have to say is why the heck am I so drawn? I dated a Leo women for 2 years and got killed. I had a very hard time emotionaly and had a hard time opening up to anyone except close friends for a long time! Talking over a year. Now like magic I fell victim to the scorpio women. It is true Cancer men are sensative as I am but the men you complain of are wussies plain and simple!!! True cancer Men understand their emotions thourgh some expierience and should understand that yes you have to be a man to move forward in life. Sounds like you girls are too young and only dated wussy cancer boys and have yet to be with a true cancer man. Being sensative myself I have learned to bit the bullet when needed and step out of my comfort zone because true cancer men stand up for what is right in life and the life of self pity and depression is not the way to live
I AM A SCORPIO FEMALE , I HAVE A WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL SON WHO IS A CANCERIAN. HE IS ABSOLUTELY ONE OF THE BEST PEOPLE IN THE ENITRE WORLD. THERE ARE DIFFERENT TYPES OF SCORPIO FEMALES THE SOFT ONE AND THE TOUGH ONES THE SOFT ONES ARE MORE COMPASSIONATE. I HAVE ALWAYS ADMIRED AND WANTED A LOVING, KIND AND GENEROUS CANCERIAN MAN. CANCERIAN MEN ARE VERY TENDER, I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN INVOLVED WITH THE INSENTITIVE TYPES OF MEN THAT WERE NOT COMPATABLE WITH ME. JUST BECAUSE A MAN STAND UP TO THING AND SHOW HIS STRENGHT DOES NOT MAKE HIM STRONG. A STRONG MAN IS ONE THAT IS SENTITIVE, CARING , LOVING, PROTECTIVE, JEALOUS, POSSESSIVE, AND CLINGING. I LOVE THESE QUALITIES IN MY CANCERIAN MAN, AND HE LOVES MY STRENGHT. WHEN HE CRIES IT REALLY DOES SOMETHING TO ME, IT MAKES WANT TO BABY HIM AND ASSURE HIM THAT EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT. HE IS VERY MOODY BUT I UNDERSTANDS HIM, WHEN HE IS MOODY I LEAVE HIM TO HISSELF AND DO SOMETHING I ENJOY DOING. THIS GIVES ME TIME TO MYSELF, I’LL TAKE A BATH AND PUT ON SOMETHING REALLY SEXY, FIX HIM A DRINK , MAKE SOMETHING GREAT TO EAT, AND PUT ON SOFT MUSIC THIS LETS HIM KNOW I UNDERSTAND AND THAT I LOVE HIM. IT IS CRUEL FOR A FEMALE TO BELITTLE A MAN JUST BECAUSE HE IS DIFFERENT, IT IS LIKE BEATING A CHILD BECAUSE HE IS DIFFERENT FROM HIS BROTHERS AND SISTERS. THESE WOMEN ARE ABUSIVE AND CALLOUS, THEY SHOULD NOT BE IN ANYTYPE OF RELATIONSHIP UNTIL THEY GET THE HELP THEY SO DEARLY NEEDS. WOMEN MUST UNDERSTAND THAT MEN ARE DIFFERENT, AND GOD MADE THESE MEN DIFFERENT FOR A REASON. SOME MEN ARE JUST SENTSITIVE AND GENTLE, AND DO NOT SEE A NEED TO BE AGGRESIVE. THERE SHOULD BE MORE MEN WITH THE CANCERIAN MEN TRUE NATURE AND MAYBE THIS COUNTRY WOULD NOT BE IN THE MESS IT IS IN. I WOULD NEVER AS LONG AS I LIVE GO BACK TO THE OTHER TYPE OF MEN I HAVE PREVIOUSLY DATED. THE CANCERIAN MAN UNDERSTANDS ME, HE HOLDS A SENSIBLE CONVERSATION ABOUT ANY SUBJECT. HE HAS A LOT OF CLASS, HE IS POLITE, HE IS KIND , HE ALWAYS SAYS SWEET THINGS, A GREAT KISSER, FANTASIC IN BED, HE IS THE ONLY MAN THAT EVER FULFILLED MY NEEDS IN BED WHEN OTHER MEN MAKE PROMISES THEY CAN NOT KEEP, AND HE ALWAYS HAVE A SMILE ON HIS FACE WHEN HE SEES ME. MOST WOMEN DO NOT KNOW WHEN THEY HAVE A GOOD THING, WHILE THEY ARE MESSING OVER THE CANCERIAN MAN THEY CLEAN UP WOMAN IS WAITING. A MATURE MIND WOMAN DO NOT HAVE THE TIME TO BE PLAYING MIND GAMES WITH DIFFIRENT MEN. FOR A SCORPIO WOMAN THAT BEST POSSIBLE MAN FOR HER IS A CANCERIAN HE WILL OVERLOOK HER MULTITUDE OF FAULTS. A SCORPIO WOMEN CAN BE HARD OR SOFT I SUGGEST THEY DEVELOP THEIR GENTLE SIDE. A CANCERIAN IS A LITTLE BOY AT HEART AND HIS FEELINGS ARE EASILY HURT BY HARSHNESS AND UNKIND WORDS AND DEEDS. HE WILL ALWAYS TREAT YOU LIKE A LADY AS LONG AS YOU ARE BEING ONE.
angie
I agree with you, I also have a Cancerian son, what a character! I love him to peices. My mother is a Scorpio and Father was Cancerian too, She appreciated his sensitive nature. He was the best dad and her soul mate. They were together 40 years and the only thing that he ever did to hurt her was to die. They had this us against the world thing going, it was beautiful…. Without him she is torn and only stays here for her kids and grandkids, otherwise shed have gone with him. I dont think many loves can top a Scorpio/Cancer love.
angie
My father was over protective, bossy, pushy, I miss him…..crabs grab your heart with those pinchers and never let go
vodka
you need a Scorpio woman real bad……Stop running.
Hmmm….ever date a Libra woman? better not, you will both get fat together, LOL. Two indulgers in the same kitchen? OMG
Hi, I am a scorpio woman who is dating a cancer man. I am very complicted when it comes to relationships.. I usually get bored/annoyed after a few months or even weeks of dating any guy because I dont like them to constantly be calling me and I dont like to report to them what I am doing. Well, now I am dating this guy who is a cancer, I believe he is the first cancer that I date and I like the fact that he doesnt call me often. But at the same time sometimes over a week will pass after a date and he wont take the initiative to invite me out again and I want him to but I just get anxious about it and just end up telling him myself “when are we gonna go to this “certain” place that we talked about?” and then we’ll agree on another date and he’ll act real excited about seeing me. But at the same time it kinda upsets me that he doesnt do it himself. It makes me think sometimes that he might not be taking me seriously or that he may not even like me as much as I like him. It kind of frusterates me and keeps me intregued at the same time (lol). But finally when we do get to go on our dates we have a great time! We cant stop laughing, we are constantly talking, touching, and the sex is great! He is a great listener and will do whatever I tell him without questioning me. I dont know if I should bring this up now or should I wait longer? Does any know of any good book on dating men baised on their horoscope?
That is interesting, Melanie. I an a Cancer and some time ago met an Aries male with exactly same planets you are describing. Shortly after it became apparent that he is very much attracted to me. I felt attraction for him as well, but reasoned that it will end up being a fling kind of thing so kept away. I would have offered him one, but I know Aries don’t do the fling thing too well. They need that 100% commitment from you even if they will disappear out of your life in a few weeks. And I wasn’t going to lie to him. Might be something up with that particular combination that makes you attracted to Cancers.
in love with a cancer man..but he’s not in love with me..
how do i get one of those awesome chart things? my fiance is a cancer and i’m a scorpio, not sure about the other parts, but am super interested! we are apart right now and it’s super tough, not to mention the fights! help!