How To Break Up With A Fire Sign (Part 1 of the Breaking Up Series)

Disclaimer: This blog entry is for humorous and educational purposes only. Adhere to the following advice at your own risk.

Yes, breaking up is hard to do. And it’s so much harder when your soon-to-be-ex is an amusing Aries, a lovely Leo, or a smart Sagittarius. If you’ve ever dated fire signs, then you know that breaking up with them is nearly impossible, especially if they don’t want to break up with you. In that case, they’ll pull out all the stops to win you back, which can be a very tempting proposition for you. Assuming you’re truly ready to move on from your Aries, Leo or Sagittarius, you’ll need all the help you can get to make the breakup stick. Here’s a guide to initiating (and surviving) a breakup with a fire sign.

The Break-Up Strategy

Breaking up with an Aries requires some foresight (not a trait that Aries is known for having, by the way). Without a plan of action, the probability of getting pulled into a knock-down, drag-out fight is very high if Aries even suspects for one second that you’re voluntarily walking away from the relationship first (keyword with Aries). The least painful tactic (for you) is to convince Aries that it’s his or her idea to break up with you. Become the antithesis of what Aries respects: a lazy, unfocused and indecisive coward. To make sure the breakup sticks, adopt a new pessimistic outlook on life. Whenever Aries comes to you excited about a brand new venture, point out all the reasons why the venture is the worst idea in the history of ideas. Make sure to point out flaws in Aries’ plan only ONCE, though, because repeating yourself will signal to Aries that an argument is on the horizon. Naturally, an argument may turn Aries on and lead to some break-up-to-make-up sex. If that happens, you’ll have to start all over from scratch, except now Aries thinks you’re playing the “Breakup Game” as foreplay for another enthusiastic sex session.

Leo is a very loyal sign, so breaking up can be extra tricky. In order to escape from Leo unscathed, you must commit to putting aside your ego for the greater good of the breakup. As with Aries, the goal here is to get Leo to break up with you. There are two surefire ways to having a relatively stress-free parting with a Leo:

1.) Go light on the praise and remove the words “thank you” from your vocabulary, but lay the criticism on heavy (especially in front of someone Leo admires)

AND/OR

2.) Convince Leo you’re not worthy of being in the relationship.

Examples of tactic #2 include getting demoted (or better yet, fired) for doing something Leo can’t put a positive spin on or being seen in public looking significantly less groomed than normal (or as Leo expects). The beauty of convincing Leo you’re unworthy is that you’ll just be confirming what Leo already thinks, so this will be very easy. The exception is if you’re a super, duper great catch (to Leo). In that case, don’t bother with #2 because Leo will just hang onto the relationship even tighter. The worst thing you can do at this point is raise Leo’s suspicions that a dumping is around the corner or those paws will dig in and the Lion or Lioness will refuse to be “convinced” that breaking up is for the best. When all else fails, cease all forms of physical affection and that will have the Leo sealing the breakup deal faster than you can spell G-E-T L-O-S-T.

Since Sagittarius appreciates and respects honesty, you can breakup with Sagittarius using a straightforward approach. Luckily, the famous Sagittarius sense of humor will go a long way in helping a breakup remain amicable. Sagittarius may have even been contemplating whether he or she really likes being in the relationship in the first place. This, of course, makes your job a lot easier. Sag may try to find out the reason behind your decision if the relationship is a good one to him or her. He or she will most likely play things cool by cracking some jokes about how they’ll catch you in the next lifetime. To a Sag’s way of thinking, the breakup provided food for thought, another life lesson learned, and yet another friend to add to his or her ever-expanding collection of buddies.

The Ex-Files

Unless you have extremely compatible personalities, don’t expect to be friends with Aries after the relationship ends. As a matter of fact, don’t be surprised if Aries deals with the breakup by auditioning new admirers as your replacement immediately after your breakup.

Leo makes a wonderful ex if allowed to save face during the breakup. The benefits of Leo as an ex is that his or her benevolent nature almost guarantees that you will receive help in your times of need (especially if you two share any children).

Sagittarius rarely dwells on the past, so there is great potential for you and your Sagittarius ex to be best friends even after the breakup (but only if you dealt with the situation honestly).

How has your relationship with an Aries, a Leo or a Sagittarius ended? Did the end of your relationship with a fire sign leave you feeling extinguished or ablaze?

About the Author

Jara Dan-Fodio has been gazing at the sky and observing people all of her life. After reading her first astrology book that went beyond the 12 zodiac signs 15 years ago, the patterns she noticed began to make sense. Although she dabbles in vocational, predictive and electional astrology upon request, her favorites are depth astrology and synastry. She’s an eternal student of life and astrology is just one of her many teachers. You can find more of this 8th houser’s astro-notes at Random Astrology or Twitter.

Comments

  1. His moon is in Gemini.

    This doesn’t happen with every guy, but it has happened more than a few times.

    I seem to attract arrogant, eccentric guys, at least it seems that way

    I know i was really good to him while we went out, I cooked and did him favors and we had sizzling hot sexual chemistry lol…BUT, he is very arrogant and self-centered, AND he talks crap about some of his exes, which I don’t like.

  2. My moon is in Libra, my venus is in Leo and my rising sign is Sagittarius, if that’s any help!

  3. you were just too good to let go!

    your libra moon can make you indecisive. have you tried break up with him only to get back togehter?

    gemini moon is flithy, gets bored easily. they usually dont have problems letting go either.

  4. @ Sag24/7

    Gemini moon is filthy? How do you feel about Taurus sun, Gemini moon, Taurus venus and Cancer mars?

    I’m Sag sun, venus & rising, aquarius moon and SCORPIO mars :(

  5. Sag24/7

    Ha yeah I have broken things off only to let him come back! Because deep down I dont WANT to end it, I just think it won’t work and that it won’t last. I’m a Virgo so I always try to be practical. Yup i Know its boring but I like to be sure of things!

    Maybe I am too good to let go, I sure would like to believe that! I thought him saying he just wanted space rather than agreeing to end our relationship (and I use that term loosely because he loves his freedom) was just *his way* or maybe the *Sagittarius* way of breaking things off.

    Thanks for your insight :)

  6. i meant to say gemini moon is flighty…get bored easily, tendency to roam

    i heard that some tauris can be a good match for sag women. they can ground us. but they can also bore us

  7. @ Sag24/7

    LOL, I gotcha.

    Flighty, huh? At the moment he is quite the faithful lover… to his GIRLFRIEND! It must be those damned German tendencies :(

  8. Lol,sorry to say that but it’s exactly the way it is described here..Im an aries woman. Everything is true, no friendship after break up-I tried it so hard,still do it,but it’s impossible for me. If u love someone how can you be only friends with him? Despite my huge love for my ex, I have no idea how but 7days after he dumped me I met that guy who I hooked up with….believe me I didnt feel like it just happened…It doesnt exclude the situation where I am single and wasnt able to find the real replacement for over 3 years after the breakup…What else…There is no good way to break up with me..My ex when he did it first time, I told him that I think it’s a very bad decision,he got back after 3 days…
    Another thing, I was with one guy, libra/scorpio and wanted to break up with him for a long time, it was extremely hard. Btw, he was totally pessimistic, my offer to do sth go out somewhere etc was always (un)welcomed with big, ‘no’, he was lazy etc..
    Maybe he read your guide how to break up with me?lol. But seriously, we didnt love each other so break up was not so hard, or maybe the period after the break up.
    I stil hurt after 3yr ago breakup….

  9. A Boring Taurus.???

    That is unheard off unless of course there was no PASSION to begin with so that
    explains the reason as to why they wanted you to feel bored so you can move on
    without them having to say so.!!!

    Cheers Girls and keep Smiling. Taurus.

  10. There is no such thing as an Ex Lover becoming just a Friend whilst the Fires
    are still burning brightly within your Mind, Heart and Soul.!!!

    Cheers Girls and keep Smiling. Taurus.

  11. I’m a Leo who has leaned a lot about herself the last three years dealing with a Pisces lover.

    First of all if you want to break up with me be honest. Don’t bury your head in the sand or think you can slink away without an explanation to save your face or to avoid confrontaion. That’s cowardly and Leos hate that. If you are just honest and open we will respect you. If you decide to be a coward anyway I am just going to try to get you to do the nasty deed by hanging on and teaching you to grow up.

    Secondly, there is no friendship after a breakup for me. What’s the point of that especially if there was deep feelings? that just hurts too much.

  12. @karissa15,

    no disrespect, i just think tauris are boring.

  13. Hi Sag24/7

    Thank you for making me laugh you are a funny Girl and I like you.!!!

    Perhaps you have a point because you came across the wrong Taurus whom
    was boring. But the fact is when we love you and feel passionate about you we
    are very exciting and make life very interesting beyond your imagination for the
    fire we feel within our mind, heart and soul compares to no other and is second
    to none.!!!

    Cheers lovely Girl and keep Smiling. Taurus.

  14. Karissa15, you haven’t met enough Taurus men because there surely are a fair number of them who are, in fact, boring. This is a Libra woman talking, however, so what you and I consider ‘boring’ is probably on two totally different wavelengths, altogether.

    As for getting rid of the Fire signs… Let’s see…
    I’m not too fond of Leo men; they’re a little too aggressive, but I certainly plan to keep trying (I need the research for my book!).
    Aries men seem to respond apathetically to the ‘this isn’t working’ talk and they move on rather quickly.
    Breaking up with a Sag man is an interesting endeavor, indeed. I’d never want to leave one!

    Honestly, from my experiences with Fire signs (both friends and lovers, alike), I have to admit that they are surprisingly logical given their reputation as individuals of action and impulse. It seems as though honesty, with Aries, Leo, and Sag, is the best policy. They tend to become so wrapped up in themselves emotionally rather than in their partner, so they probably have no clue what’s really going on inside of their partner’s head unless you tell them.

    Best of luck, though! They are stubborn!

  15. @scales, i agree with honesty being the best policy.

    all the sag men that ive come across *cough* have been good to me. why would i ever want to leave em?

  16. scales89 says:

    @sag24/7 Yessssss!

    Who doesn’t love a hot steamy affair with a Centaur? …hell, even if it does leave you in the wake of his absence, wanting more. What’s that saying? “‘Tis better to have loved and lost…” haha It definitely holds true for those damn, charming and manly Sag guys… -sigh-

  17. Taurus men are boring. The only things they’re good for is eating and having sex.

  18. If is was to break-up with a Leo, I’d go fro tactic number 2. I would rather humble myself down rather than blaming the person why the relationship didn’t work. If he’s not that worth it, act it out by blaming yourself. In that way, that would be less painful for him.

  19. @Psychic Predictions. That’s also one way of seeing if they really love you too. If you make yourself look less appealing in some way one of two things will happen. 1.) You’ll get what you want and they will end it or 2.) You’ll just make them hang on til the bitter end kicking and screaming the whole way. Really I have to say the best way to break up with a leo is to all together stop feeding their ego. When we’re not at the top of your list for compliments its pretty much over for us. Its just a reassurance issues.

  20. @ Sag24/7
    @Bliss

    Hello everyone! I hope you are well. It has been quite some time since I have been on here. Since I last posted on here many things have happened…also reminding you that I am a Sag^^
    Since my heartbreak back in late 2010:
    -I dated 2 girls and started a relationship with one, with a Leo, that only last for 2 months, mainly because I felt constricted by her in various forms. We are friends now and occasionally hang out.
    -I never got closure to my terrible break up.
    -Heartbreaker aries got in contact with me recently.

    For my past posts on what happened, they are in my recent posts in my profile as I do not post often.
    -Aries got in contact with me on Sept.13 2011…a year ago to the day, which was the last form of contact I had with her. It was via facebook. I waited about 4 days to mull it over in my head what I wanted to say to her. I kept it short and cracked a joke. I let her contact me a couple of more times, all with me answering in shortness. After that I ignored her.
    -She texts me about 2 weeks later…meaning she still had my number after she said she deleted it…a year prior. I responded in short, then I slam her with my emotions, asking that after all this time who does she think she is…yadda yadda. I also get wind, at this time from friends, that she is about to break up with her Scorpio bf..the guy she left me for.
    -Through the grape vine i hear she breaks up with her ex. Emotions simmer down, and over the next couple of weeks we stay in contact, about 5ish messages are sent…I allow her to start all of the engagement.
    -After a month and a half of contact we meet and catchup…it went well. She proposed that she wants to be friends.
    *We do not text and have had zero phone contact. I regard that as a more personal form of contact and have been using facebook.
    *I never brought up our relationship, nor did i inquire about any of hers. She was the one who brought up her breakup of the Scorpio.
    *She has a limited selection of friends…something that I always wondered about…
    *After the meeting I had a strange couple of days, where I had no idea what I was feeling…where it just came down to..I still am in Love with her. I told her via letter why I could never be friends with her, because of how I felt..it would never work and of this I know.
    *Since then, she has pushed for us to be friends many many times, to which I said, if I were to consider it that I would need an unexplainable amount of time…and that may not ever change. It ended with me challenging her personal strategy game..something she never lost at, and I was the only one to beat her and beat her multiple times…that we could be friends if she were able to beat me at that.
    *Again her response was towards a friendship…so we could do things how we use to do [ which I dont understand because i was only in a relationship with her..and she refers to movies, playing a strategy game that she loves, on the slight occasion drinking( something we never did much of) and doing a lot of what we did]
    *I know from experience, that I must let these feelings go, in order to become friends with her. So I left her hanging, without answering her…only time will tell

    ?’s- Why did she contact me to become friends?
    -Do you think these are her honest intentions?
    -I heard aries never go back, so why is she back?
    sigh…

  21. Who told you Aries never come back?!?! I’ve had 3 that came back. It’s probably guilt because she left you for someone else, so she wants to make amends through friendship.

  22. ‘Taurus men are boring. The only things they’re good for is eating and having sex.’

    have to agree to an extent from experience. I have more fun out with an aries friend than I had with a taurus.

  23. @Chris,

    Hey!! Nice to see you and thanks for coming back and updating.

    We will go back if we feel like we made a mistake or to make amends. I only did that once when I was at fault and later regretted it. Not that I wanted to get back together as it was but just wanted him to know I cared and truly did miss him as a friend.

    I don’t know her motives but it’s either: she feels bad and knows she hurt a good guy she really cared for or she’s using you to make her feel good while she’s hurting from the broken relationship.

    You know her best so determine her motive. But, above all, put yourself first and do what is right for you. If you can’t accept her as a friend right now, just tell her that. You can’t force friendship of fake your feelings and she can’t just walk back into your life like nothing ever happened either.

  24. So first of all I want to thank everyone that has helped me through this over the past year and half. It means so much to me.
    @Bliss
    I never thanked you for your last comment…and it did indeed help.
    So after countless messages via fb, unresolved issues, and raging emotions, everything has come to a close. Finally. This is our last little talk. She did not have a cell phone at the time or it would have taken place over that.

    J
    Chris you confuse the hell out of me.

    Christopher
    hm lets start from scratch
    ..
    15 hours ago
    Christopher
    stop being confused
    ..although I can see why you are
    ..
    15 hours ago
    Christopher
    Tell me when you are ready and il start.
    ..
    15 hours ago
    J
    ready for what? and you’ll start what?
    ..
    15 hours ago
    Christopher
    explaining
    ..
    15 hours ago
    J
    gracias
    ..
    15 hours ago
    Christopher
    denada
    ..
    15 hours ago
    Christopher
    So september comes and you get in contact with me after a year +
    After what had happened and what was said before and how things ended, I was curious why you contacted me
    -So we chat
    -A little while later, we meet. And I realize then and there that I still love you. I send a message
    -You say that you want to be friends…and here I start to see my delemma
    -With me so far?
    ..
    15 hours ago
    J
    yea
    ok i think im starting to get it. so you want more than friends or nothing at all?
    ..
    15 hours ago
    Christopher
    Thats what it comes down to. For myself, I tried different ways to break away, not doubt confusing you.
    Trying to be a friend, then ignoring, then trying to use old anger
    ..
    15 hours ago
    J
    can you put aside the old anger and truly start fresh with me?
    ..
    15 hours ago
    Christopher
    I will never agree with what you did, but that never stopped me from loving you. Yes of course I can over look that. However,
    If you were to ask me if I would redo whatever I did, I would say certainly not.
    my question to you, is would you do what you did over again?
    -and
    -can you truly start fresh with me?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    no i wouldnt do it again, and yes i can start fresh with you. thats what ive been trying to do this entire time
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Chris
    but only as a friend right?
    i mean
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    you still want more than that?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    I want your heart
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    you want a relationship?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    I want it to grow into that yes.
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    so you’d never want to just be friends and like go out drinking and stuff?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    Never. I would want that to be an us doing that. I could never look at the girl I was/still in love with, as a justa friend to shoot the breeze with.
    Thats why I have been fighting with myself. Maybe I thought it was possible for me to do that. I cant.
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    Im in a place in my life right now where im just trying to form friendships and not really start anything serious. im sure you can understand that
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    I can
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    its just cause i need to figure my life out right now, does that make sense?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    It makes perfect sense.
    More sense thantthe last few months.
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    if you can only be in a relationship with me or else i need to leave you alone im ready to respect your wishes and give you space
    i dont want to make things harder for you at all
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    Thank you. That means so much to me.
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    ok so, blocking me? no more tlaking?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    You know
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    ?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    I havent smiled this big in forever. If you are being completely honest from what you just said…that is so awesome
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    i am, i wouldnt wanna make things harder for you
    i can leave u alone if that will help u and thats what you wanted
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    Yea it would be best : )
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    ok bye :)
    want me to block u?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    Goodluck : ) girl I love
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    u too
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    no need
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    ok
    did u know that u still loved me before u saw me?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    No..I thought it was all gone. Replaced by other emotions. Curiostiy was what wanted me to see you
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    what made you think you still loved me once u saw me again?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    In my letter, I told you I had a flood of emotions that day…it was nearly hard to concentrate
    So for a couple of days after we didnt talk
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    oh ok gotcha
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    Thats when it hit me. I understood that I had anger towards you. But
    my heart was doing what it used to do around you…even just thinking about you.
    It was deja vu for that organ. My brain told me otherwise.
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    what is it about me?
    im not that special lol
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    When I was with you…
    you just being you did it for me
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    is it the sex?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    no
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    do u think our sex was good?
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    that was a small part of it..i mean it was great..just not what made me like you
    your personality. you were fun. so much fun
    your laugh
    and you made me laugh
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    i can tell youre a really good guy
    thats so rare
    ..
    14 hours ago
    Christopher
    you know..
    people say they take for granted so much
    I took your personality for that. Your physical attributes were just icing on the cake
    ..
    14 hours ago
    J
    i didnt feel very attractive but thank you and im glad u thought so
    i like ur personality too
    which is why i wanted to hang out again
    wow im kinda tired. think i might go to bed. i understand if you block me. goodnight :)
    ..
    13 hours ago
    Christopher
    You have always been beautiful to me. Inside and out. The pinnacle of aesthetic admiration.
    I am glad you did. Thanks.
    It is because I love you that I can let you go, and why i cant be your friend…because I know you will be amazing and successful.
    Almost two years ago I met you…and I will never ever forget you. Ever.

    Fire+Fire = Explosion : )

    *P.S. it (^) should come with a warning LOL
    *P.P.S I dont care what you say, our next life, your all mine.
    ..

  25. im not really feeling this aries gal. when reading your texts, i like that she said that she was willing to leave you alone in order for you both to move on. you both agreed on that as the best thing. in the early texting, i like that you remained firm on what YOU wanted. not many men seem to know what they want, but you do. u keep telling her that you love her and such. it bothers me that she never said it back to you.

    UNTIL

    you both agreed that her leaving you alone was the best thing to do. then she comes outta left field and wants to know why you love her? is she for real? you guys were in a relationship, she should know. plus, asking about the sex is way left field. seriously whats the deal. she said the word “love” but never “i love you 2″ or “i was in love with u” nothing…doesnt that make you wonder?

    its like she wants to keep u on the hook or something. asking u why you love her, is she good in bed…i am bothered by this. its like she diggin in the knife more in the wound. im curious why she didnt end the conversation after u both agreed to no contact. she wants you to keep thinking about her. she wants her way in your relationship with her, even in the communication.

    the fact that she needs to figure things out is a weak excuse to me. why cant u both grow together?

    keep standing your ground saggi. as a mutable sign, its easy for people to walk all over us because we adapt to accomdate the needs of others. dont neglect yourself. :)

  26. @sag24/7
    you know your right. I never really thought about it like that. I did notice that she never said I was in love with you or I love you too..anything like that. In all honesty I was confused by it. She came back to me after her 1 year relationship didnt work out with the scorpio and just wanted to be friends. It took me 1 meeting, 5 emails, 1 letter, 2 phone conversations, and finally this little fb messaging to tell her I couldnt be friends. It took her that long to accept it.. Some of the stuff I wrote her and told her during this time all had to do with me still being in love with her and she wouldnt have it. Jeeez…

    The only thing I can think of that might affect her way of thinking, is that 3 months before she and I got together, she came out of a serious relationship. After 2 ish years you would think she needed time to figure things out. Then it was me for 6 1/2 months..then immediately 1 year with a scorpio. Maybe i was just a rebound from her 2 year…maybe thats why she doesnt feel that kind of love : /.

    Your right sag…im holding my ground. I have blocked both her numbers and fb and deleted her email. Its just out of personal will power now.

  27. I agree, Sag24/7. Even though she said “I can leave you alone if you want,” she ended up fishing for compliments. I see it as her validating that she was “the shit” once. She said she was figuring out her life right now, so it’s possible that she’s trying to reconnect with people she had fun with/cared about once to make her feel better about herself. And once she’s gotten whatever ego boost she needs, she’s off to “figure out her life” with someone else.

    Mad odd. It sounds like something is going on with her. Maybe she’s feeling insecure and she’s looking to you to dump her emotions on? I dunno, but she’s baaad news.

  28. quiche hit the spot!

    she is feeling insecure after that scorpio breakup so she needs to talk to someone who will make her feel better about herself. ive done it 2. which is why when people have a breakup, they go back to an ex. especially if the ex is still in love.

    i wouldnt put too much thought into her dating style. aries are relationship oriented people. they dont stay single long.

    any girl would be so lucky to have a man who loves her as much as you love this girl. it will take some time to get over her. but hey who knows, you 2 may find some common ground in get back together.

  29. Sag24/7 I think we have the same bday. Nov 25 black friday.

    I’ve been lurking here for quite some time and Chris, you sound like a lovely guy. You’re able to communicate your feelings thoughtfully and you can analyze them and the motivations as well. Too many guys can’t be honest about what they’re about (especially in these times where most guys are trying to be shysters without knowing how to play the game).

    Any lady that comes across you will be lucky.

  30. omg girl!

    there was a solar eclipse on our birthday! happy belated birthday saggi!

    your in for a great year. lost of awesomely wierd luck.

  31. I hope so! I’ve been working as an intern for an extended period of time and I really really need a job (and a change of location) to keep me sane. Happy bday to you too!

  32. Well number 1):
    You guys are awesome. Thanks for the compliments : ) Sag24/7..Thanks quiche

    2) So in my natal chart 7 fire signs…5 are saggi 1 leo 1 aries

    my venus is capricorn…so thats why it took me a while to fall for her but since I did its so hard to move on. F*ck.

    3) Since you mentioned it, it really bothers me that she never said anything about her being in love or loving me….at all. In any of our conversations over the past 3 months. I just ended a short relationship back in july with a leo, and I got more of a sense of appreciation from her.

    4) If this had happened 7 months ago I would be depressed. Not now though. What is done is done. I cannot change how she feels nor can I change how I feel, and the only direction I can go is forward. I have a coffee date on friday with a different aries ^^ It sucks to love someone who does not appreciate you : /

  33. Chris Quote: “The only thing I can think of that might affect her way of thinking, is that 3 months before she and I got together, she came out of a serious relationship. After 2 ish years you would think she needed time to figure things out. Then it was me for 6 1/2 months..then immediately 1 year with a scorpio. Maybe i was just a rebound from her 2 year…maybe thats why she doesnt feel that kind of love : /.”

    So you were with her for 6 1/2 months? Did she or you ever say that you loved one another directly? I ask because if you said it and she said it, then yeah, what I wrote about her wanting her ego fed would be possibly true. But, she could be mind-numbingly out of touch with her feelings as many immature Aries are. If she never said she loved you, then know this about the Aries creature: We have no clue about our inner selves and we do tend to go from relationship to relationship when young mostly because the next one makes us feel good and it covers any need to look deeper until we get truly burned out and say, ‘what a minute, what the hell am I doing here?!’ In that case, I can understand her asking those questions because the sad fact is she does not have a clue of her impact on you or why she did what she did.

    You see, we need a lot of time to mature enough to be able to look within. We move so fast in life. We hate to take time out to reflect when we really should. It seems she gravitated to you after her break-up because from what I know of a Sag/Aries relationship, you Sag’s are so much fun to be with and she needed that but probably took you for granted until she met someone else who impacted her (still looking outside of herself for gratification) and it was all surface crap because she never did the dirty work of looking within and getting in touch with her true emotions and needs. We are not naval gazers so we have no frigin’ clue sometimes why we do what we do. That’s not an excuse by any means, just an explanation of sorts.

    I can see where people would say her questions were all ego-centric, I did too as I read your convo. But you have to understand, she needs to know how she impacted you to realize the severity of her mistake in not taking care of your needs, even if she just thought of you as a friend. She could think she is the shit but really, Aries needs to be told off at times to gain understanding that what they do does impact people and not to take it lightly. Only a sociopath wouldn’t care. And regardless of a possible consensus on Aries being sociopaths, again, it takes time to understand the deeper aspects of our psyche and how to truly love unselfishly (meaning, love isn’t just what makes us feel good at the time or to heal our past wounds. It’s a two way street that demands a level of responsibility to give as least as much as we receive).

    Enough about her.

    I’m so proud of you! You handled yourself in such an intelligent and thoughtful way! You let her know your feelings and maintained your dignity throughout it all. Bravo!
    Stay strong. She really sounds clueless and you became a victim of her shallowness. If it helps at all, it’s not intentional or your fault. Aries energy is geared towards extroversion so the inner work takes a lot of time and bad experiences. Hopefully she’ll work on it and I wouldn’t be surprised if she contacts you sometime in the future to make amends.

    I wish you luck on any new prospects and please do update if you can.

  34. @Bliss
    “Did she or you ever say that you loved one another directly?”
    -Yes. In fact she was the first one to say it…the “I love you” & ” I am in love with you” It really surprised me at first on how early on it happened. It almost appeared she was infatuated…but it last for nearly the entire relationship (besides the end). Also about half way through, she tried tricking me to say “I love you” in different languages….that mischevious woman..sigh.
    It took me longer, but once I fell then i fell, and I told her so. I feel like the relationship was based on love. We traveled together, did activites, everything a healthy couple would do…and “love” was both said and written on numerous letters, cards, and gifts.

    What would give her the idea that I want to be just friends?

  35. HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY!!

    I find that with a lot of fires signs we can be self-centered unintentionally. Speaking for myself( a Sag), I treat people the way I would like to be treated and expect the same in return. Half of the time, I don’t know what it is that I doing or that I may be offending someone. Since I’m direct about everything in my life, I feel its respectful for a person to be honest about breaking up with me. I’ll be hurt at first, then joke about how hurt I really am, then wonder why or what happened. If the person is honest across the board, then over time(not at the moment of the break-up) I wouldn’t hesitate to become friends with them. Good article

    P.S: Being evasive about a situation= insulting my intelligence+a punk move

  36. “In fact she was the first one to say it…the “I love you” & ” I am in love with you” It really surprised me at first on how early on it happened.”

    Wow, I can only think she just wanted to be in love with someone as most do who tend to get too involved right after a relationship. As if to carry that love on into the next relationship so not to feel the loss of being loved. Still, it’s totally irresponsible to lead another on like that. She should have known better.
    I’d love to know her chart, especially her moon & venus placements.

  37. Hers Mine

    Birth Charts

    Sun: Aries Sagittarius
    Moon: Aquarius Leo
    Mercury: Pisces Sagittarius
    Venus: Taurus Capricorn
    Mars: Capricorn Scorpio
    Jupiter: Pisces Aries
    Ascendant: Cancer Sagittarius
    Saturn: Sagittarius Sagittarius
    Neptune: Capricorn Capricorn
    Uranus: Sagittarius Sagittarius
    Pluto: Scorpio Scorpio

    If I did this correctly …. hers for april 3 1986 12pm central time
    mine for december 11 1987 6am Est

  38. @Chris
    Couldn’t help but read about your journey. You sound like a great guy! I wish you the very best in healing and more reciprocal wonderful passionate love!

    @Bliss

    “And regardless of a possible consensus on Aries being sociopaths, again, it takes time to understand the deeper aspects of our psyche and how to truly love unselfishly (meaning, love isn’t just what makes us feel good at the time or to heal our past wounds. It’s a two way street that demands a level of responsibility to give as least as much as we receive)”

    Wow! That is very intriguing. I met someone with a pivotal Aries placement. Libra was the North Node and I felt it made sense. Isn’t it amazing how you can look to the other point in the astrological wheel for the balance? I do feel the Aries lessons are about finding a way to use that bountiful enthusiasm and passion to inspire others to be courageous in their lives versus ME, ME, ME! Its a heightened gift when given that way.

  39. Thanks NovLady : )

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