Why Scorpio men won’t tell how they feel about you

The initial stage of a relationship is harrowing, especially if you are with an uncommunicative man. You’re falling for him, but he just won’t come out and say how he feels. He’s sticking around, yes … but how do you know it’s not just for sex, or because being with you is better than being alone? You want clarity! And unfortunately, the Scorpio man is not the most divulging guy on the block.

Scorpio is the sign of secrets. This sign is not forthcoming, but for good reason. Scorpio is an emotional water sign, and feels pretty deeply. It may not be obvious, but there’s alot going on inside. The Scorpio man is keenly aware of people’s ability to harm, abuse and manipulate one another. His ruling planet Pluto is the Lord of the Underworld, after all. Scary, dark things happen down there. Unspeakable things. It is better to just keep a lid on it, don’t you think? Otherwise, all the demons will be unleashed, and that’s not a pretty thing.

So, he keeps his feelings close to his chest. Although Scorpio has a rep for being mysterious, he’s only hiding from you because he’s afraid. After all, if he bares his soul to you, who knows how you can use that sensitive information to undermine him? He needs to trust you — implicitly — to give you the keys to his heart. He may indeed love you, but it’s not easy for him to utter the words. Not until he’s made sure they won’t come back and haunt him.

About Jeffrey Kishner

Jeffrey Kishner is founder and publisher of Sasstrology. He is a licensed mental health counselor and has been doing astrological counseling since 2001. Jeffrey has been published in print magazines including The Mountain Astrologer and Dell Horoscope, and has written online for sites including AOL, Tarot.com and StarIQ. Jeffrey has also been heavily involved in the astrology blogger community. Read his personal blog at JeffreyKishner.com.

Comments

  1. Im VIRGO female and there’s this scorpio male he’s hot and cold but always comes to my rescue if i could be in a sticky situation at work so i can tell that he cares somewhat but he’s a big flirt and i can be jealous at times he also blushes when we flirt with one another.he is sometiming when it comes to text and i tell him he always ignoring me he says its not like that he but i get too many mixed signals. can anyone give me insight or shed more light lol

  2. Im VIRGO female and there’s this scorpio male i think he’s into me but he’s a flirt so im in between. I make him blush a lot and hes just so hard to read at times but i can be mysterious and hot and cold with him but its like he like it. im also a bit stubborn and he says he think im mean lol but i am stern and stand my ground(no push over) and there for him when needed. Do u think he’s really into me

  3. Hi Posh

    Scorpios tend to play their cards very close to their chest. Take their time and
    are very slow to reveal their true feelings which they are unable to explain to
    themselves at first so they can take quite some time to reach the point of being
    able to come clean as to how they really feel but once they do you will definitely
    know because they pull all the stops and are full steam ahead and that is when
    you will know for certain that he is “Really Into You”.

    I take it this is a new relationship or on the way to becoming one so just be patient
    by giving it time to evolve and develop naturally and the meantime it sounds as
    though you are doing a good job of keeping his interest by doing all the right things
    and especially by standing your ground and not being a pushover which is a deal
    breaker since they abhore weaklings whom are unable to withstand the pressure
    which every Scorpio has a tendency to place their potential love interest just to make
    sure they are up to the test which can make or brake their future prospects.???

    With a name like Posh you can’t go wrong. Cheers and keep Smiling. Taurus

  4. Hi. I met this scorpio man online. We emailed each other everyday for several weeks. Took it to the phone and talked/texted almost every day. We finally went on a date last weekend and really connected. He wanted to see me the next day. I couldnt because I had to work. He seemed a little put off, but ok. I spoke to him the following day, he had company and I said I would call him later or he could call me. I didn’t think he would, just a feeling I had that something wasn’t quite right after I could not see him the day prior. To my surprise he called me after his company left. He again asked to see me, but I couldn’t as I was expecting company and didn’t know when they would leave. He didn’t let on that it bothered him, but I think it did. We spoke for a while on the phone and then hung up. He said he would call me later. He did not. He texted me, but I didn’t get the text until an hour later and I responded. The following morning I got a short, curt text. Not rude, but very indifferent. Nothing like our usual. I responded. I sent another text later that day, again, he was short, curt, a little cold. I responded and didn’t hear from him any more for a few days. He texted me yesterday to say hi and have a good day. I wasn’t expecting it and I didn’t see it until hours later. I responded in friendly. He text back about an hour later, a little friendly, but not like he wanted to talk as he said he wanted to get an early start. I text back kindly.

    Something has changed. I don’t know what. When we met, it was so lovely. Now, it’s like I don’t know what happened. Any insight? His venus is in scorpio as well.

  5. I been spendin time with my scorp for almost year. im a virgo but i know we like eachother. we both came out of hurtfull relationships n now we both dealing with trust issues. We are taking things really slow n enjoyin getting to know one another. he is really sweet very affectionate n very touchy feely seems to always want to b close to me when we r together. im falling in love with him but i dont think im ready for that yet. u cant stop thinkin about him n it doesnt help when he stares into my eyes n makes me feel like he is looking into me, makes me scared to look away n when i dont he kisses me sooo omg…we r both in our 40′s so we r not children. i really want this to turn into something serious. he got mad 1 time when he saw me in my car with another guy but it was my mechanic because i was going to get a new car. i didnt even know that he saw me until 2 days later. the message he left me was so mean i thought i never get out of a dog house but i did. at first when we started seeing eachother he was really nervous n uptight n its like being with someone else now. i know we still have some work to do but im learning how to b patient i just feel like im his little secret. what do i do…i want more

  6. Let me add just because i feel like his secret i know he is not seeing anyone else. before my birthday he surprised me with dinner at his place n candles all around his house n i think i hurt his feelings by not acknowledging it verbally…thats something im working on…sorry boo….on his birthday (11/9) i surprised him with a cupcake n some candles n believe me the icing was delicious lol…im not sure what he wants from me n from what we doing…i asked him before n all i got was that stare into my eyes n those yummy kisses…please help me…i tried to pull away but when i told him i needed to do that for awhile he was not having it….he was really upsad he was saying how sorry he was for making me feel that way n that he will do anything to make it up to me…my last relationship was 17 years so im not recognizing a new one anymore but couple of my friends keep telling me that in his head we are already in a relationship he just doesnt know how to say it out loud…are they right?

  7. My b.f.is a scorp I am a leo. The love making is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We get along great for the most part.but I have caught him in small little lies- not about cheating. Sites he has visited on his computer I don’t like. But any way he can be very secretive ,lustful,flirty and has a wandering eye. Um don’t most men? Any how he can also be be loving ,generous And honest sounds contradictory since I caught him in lies.has any female had a scorp guy and found him to be very honest/or veery deceitful?? We have been exclusive for two years and love each other very.much… if you would like to let me know your thoughts e mail me [redacted by publisher] if your into astrology and horoscopes. Id like to hear what you think on scorps. Tt4 now

  8. SexySag78 says:

    I’m a Sag hopelessly connected to a Scorp male..known him since we were kids….He had the biggest crush on me back then. That was 30 years ago. He says now he was “marking his territory” way back when. Two years ago we connected…this is the quintessential long distance romance….I live down south and he up north…it started innocently enough….the occasional text, the occasional phone call…we connected in a way that I never expected…it’s like our souls merged…He wooed me with love songs…we talk hours and hours on the phone…we like the same music, movies, I get his moods, his detachment…He says I belong to him and he to me….He tells me I’m everything he’s looking for in a woman….that we’ve come full circle in this life…that he wants to live with me…He wants me to meet his son who’s five….all this before we consummated our relationship. We met up…it was magic…the love making was unlike anything I had ever imagined. It was two souls merging…I felt like the entire world melted away….the problem…I have confessed my love to him…He has said it once…no more. I feel the love in his touch, the way he holds me, looks at me…when we make love i feel him holding his passion back…like he’s afraid…I’ve met his family, they love me and I them…sometimes he gets into his dark place and retreats from me…I feel so lost when he’s “dark”…he’s sexy and beautiful and we laugh and truly have a wonderful relationship but its like he holds a part of himself away from me..so frustrating. My life is an open book, his is a straight mystery….makes me wonder….but I love him so much….

  9. SexySag78 says:

    Also, I’ve never been the clingy type….I don’t kiss any man’s ass, but for this man, i’d walk over coals. I don’t understand…he’s like crack….I can’t get enough of him…I know there’s many a female vying for his attentions/affections. He says he had friends and such, and I’ve never caught him in a lie.he’s very honest but he’s also very secretive. Last time we were together he tells his mom, who dropped by to make us a sumptuous breakfast, “say good morning to your daughter in law” wtf??? So does he live me or not,??? There are times I see the vulnerability in his eyes and just when I think he’s going to crack….bam…the Ice King returns….grrrrr

  10. SexySag78 says:

    Help…..lol

  11. NewlyWedLibraLady says:

    SaexySag78
    He loves you , they never say it , they just show you. The fact that he called you his moms daughter in law says it all, he already thinks of you as his wife. My Aqua man did the same, weve been together now for almost 5 years and he did the same thing with his family, he kept calling me his wife, we are common law, and to both of us we are married, its like how dare someone pronounces us married, we are married, LOL anyways, if you really love him, just keep showing him and stop worrying, he is in love big time…….he loves you, you might have to just be open with him and tell him how you’re never sure of his feelings if he doesn’t say them, he will LOVE it, they love to hear that someone loves them so much that it hurts, thats how they love :) Just remember his trust they almost never re trust you and you’re a Sag what may seem harmless to you or to a Libra like me is serious business to a Scorpio, don’t even joke about flirting with anyone else, they just can’t get over it…..it hard but he will always need reassurance that your love is pure for him, and only him, even a friend can never come first, he has to until you have his kids then they come first. I’m not trying to imply anything but I know that sags are fun loving and just tease sometimes, we Libras do that too, Scorpios don’t consider anything about your relationship to be funny in anyway, its all Body, Mind and Soul…….completely committed to each other, My sister in law is married to a Scorpio, OMG they are so happy. they are best friends and that tough for a Leo woman to do, let her guard down for a Scorpio man. They’ve been married for 20 yrs now, they are best friends and that’s the only way a relationship can last with a Scorpio, the best friend thing has to always be there…. My Moms a Scorpio my Dad was a Cancer, they were together for 40 yrs, it just never changed, the love just grew, if you have a Scorpio love you, you are so lucky, I hope it just gets better like it did for them.

  12. SexySag78 says:

    NewlyWed..
    Thank you for your insight…I love him. With every fiber of my being….with every drop of blood in my body….every cell every neuron…belongs to him…and only him. I’ve been married before. I’m no kid….what I feel for this man is the real deal…he said he wants to be my alpha and omega. My beginning and end…he already is…he is going through a lot right now…his ex, the mother of his son, has taken the baby out of state and he cannot see him as often as he used to. When she gets pissed at him she refuses to let him see the boy. This has devastated him. I can see his vulnerability and his pain. He knows I love him and would never hurt him. Ever. And yes you’re right. SAG LOVES to be flirty. I know. We are social butterflies. But, ever since him, my eyes,my body and soul are only for my Scorpio lover. I can’t imagine my life without him. But he gets into these moods…I call it the darkness,,, he’s been dark for 3 days now. I’m losing my mind…it never gets easier…

  13. SexySag78 says:

    I know he is testing me…I know it. He’s pushing to see if I will crack under pressure…if I will give up…become tired of his game… I will not. I have tasted the fruit of paradise…I will not give him up…to anyone or anything.

  14. SexySag78 says:

    Update….he said it…the words…he told me today he loves me…he said “I love you, babe” and I swear I almost died. He looked at me with his beautiful big brown eyes, and through those luscious full lips he breathed life into me when he said “I love you babe…”

  15. I am a virgo women, dated my scorpio guy for 1 yr plus. Initially very gushing, seeing me regularly, and had sex, and it was great. Slowly he started withdrawing. We communicated via phone, email and txt, but last 8 months did not see him.

    Last few days I told him how I felt-want to fall in love with him and move on further. He came back saying we want different things in life. My answer to him was – I know what I want and I let him know, so that later I do not regret that missed an opportunity to let him.

    He’s response was just “Understood ! :) “…From my end I am hurt and done, but I secretly still love him. I do not plan on communicating after this …Do you think he will reach out or it will just die…Do you think he will ever realize that we could have had something good and he did not give it a chance or its this scorpio ego…?

    Any help will be great -because I would love us to be a couple but I don’t want to keep waiting for ever if there is no future…Also I feel he is very interested but is hiding it. And keeps on saying I want to F….but even has not come for it either!…And I am also like hime want to be consumed by him and he loves it !..Please help

  16. wateropals says:

    Mum…
    I had the same experience with a Scorp guy. I’m a Cancer girl. There was a lot of emotion and love shared for a year but at the same time there was a lot of outer chaos affecting us that had nothing to do with our r-ship yet was very difficult for us as a couple to deal with.
    Even though it felt like we were deeply in love he started to become less and less available until one day he just completely stopped communicating.
    It took me a while to realize I had been dumped at which point I felt like my whole world just cracked wide open and I fell into the deep dark dungeons of Hell.

    Fast forward…6 months later he finally answers my plea’s for acknowledgement of what has happened to him but keeps it very cordial. He continues to email me as the year goes by with an email here and there telling me how much he misses me or how he loves me still (but always has an excuse as to why we can’t see e-other).
    Now it has been a year and a half since I have seen him and my buddy tells me “to get real. He obviously has someone”.
    So I ask my Scorpio if indeed he has someone. He doesn’t lie. “Yes…he had just got married 6 months ago but his Pisces wife knows all about me..he still loves me and wants to see me!!!!” OMG!

    I just couldn’t believe what a naive person I was and I am past 40 by some years.
    I tell him ‘don’t contact me anymore’.

    4 months later he phones me and tells me his marriage is open and that he loves me . Meanwhile his wife was next to him hearing this and he puts me on the phone with her.

    ……… Long story short…. I end up having a 7 year correspondence with him that included seeing him once or twice a year during which there was always a lot of emotion and passion and expression of love.

    Just last November he told me he was still “In love with me” . Meanwhile he has remained married to his Pisces wife and put her through college and supported her and she has taken care of him when he went through several traumatic physical near death episodes that have left him in poor health.

    I finally completely put an end to our r-ship this last May and even though I still am in love with him, I know he could just string me along for the rest of my life if I let him.

    I know he does have love for me and might really have a part of him that is ‘In love with me’ …BUT I have seen in him and other Scorpio’s the ability to love without the need to be in that persons life on a daily basis.
    Many Scorps seem to be able to be very attached and detached at the same time.
    This Scorp was an 8th house sun with Merycury, Mars, Neptune and NNode in there so he was VERY INTENSE and very obsessive.

    If you are at all getting the feeling that your Scorp is pulling away it is best just to ask him flat out what kind of relationship he wants with you. If he is a good honest guy he will tell you. If he doesn’t answer you it is his way of just wanting to keep power over you and not be in or out of a relationship with you.
    Scorpio’s are infamous for popping in and out of relationships for years.
    Usually it finally ends as mine did.

    Since then I had another Scorpio pursue me and he got very possessive and obsessed very quickly into the relationship and I ended it very quickly but he still calls me.

    Meanwhile…. another Scorpio with the same b-day as the first Scorp, also began pursuing me.. ( I have Pluto transiting across from my sun right now).
    He too kept finding ways to stay connected to me even though i tried to end that r-ship also. I really am drawn to this Scorp but scared as heck to trust him being that he has the same d-day as the 1st one.

    He in typical Scorpio fashion is just sitting back and waiting and waiting and waiting. I have a feeling he may ultimately win me over. His sun is in the 5th natural ruler is Leo and I have a lot of planets in Leo including a stelum an we both have Gemini risings just a few degree’s apart.

    In finishing… I just know that its true what they say about going into a relationship with a Scorpio. You both can expect to be changed people by it.

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