Why did Libra turn cold?

In early March, a Taurus wrote:

i arranged to go out for drink with a Libra, he agreed to meeting up and seemed quite friendly in his texts. Until the day of going out he textd me a blunt message saying he couldnt make it, i assume hes not interested but y did he turn cold

Today, presumably the same person wrote:

Im female had a date with Libra male. Before his texts were warm and friendly. He cancelled last minute saying couldnt make it his text was cold. Thought that was it. Then he text me after 3 weeks. I replied but not heard again yet. Help?

LibraOne wouldn’t normally accuse Libra of being cold. This Venus-ruled sign is charming and polite. Unfortunately, Libra goes out of his way to avoid offending anyone, and there may not always be a diplomatic way to cancel a date.

How to back out gracefully? I’ll leave matters of textiquette to Miss Manners. Although cell phones are a great medium for an air sign, it may be difficult to convey emotional subtleties via SMS. Just because a text feels cold doesn’t mean that was the texter’s intention. And besides, would it have been better for him to write that he was no longer sweet on you? I’m not sure a Libra would text anything to hurt your feelings. Maybe he thought that “i cant make it” was all he could muster.

And yet … he texted you three weeks later, and did not respond to your reply. Libra indecision for ya! Why don’t you just CALL HIM?! Tell him you like him but are getting mixed signals, and you want to know what’s up. Yes, it’s a risk (anathema to Taurus, I know), but it’s the easiest way to stop torturing yourself. If he’s not straight with you, take that into consideration when you continue pining for him.

Comment below: Have you known a Libra to turn cold? How do you make sense of it?

About Jeffrey Kishner

Jeffrey Kishner is founder and publisher of Sasstrology. He is a licensed mental health counselor and has been doing astrological counseling since 2001. Jeffrey has been published in print magazines including The Mountain Astrologer and Dell Horoscope, and has written online for sites including AOL, Tarot.com and StarIQ. Jeffrey has also been heavily involved in the astrology blogger community. Read his personal blog at JeffreyKishner.com.


  1. Amorosa Dulce says:

    I pray for you. I’m sorry that it had to happen. 🙁 As for you Gemini Woman, I don’t think he’s actually serious. Sex is sex. It can be special, or it can just be a one-time thing. Libra men, although they truly wish for their perfect partner, they tend to get really carried away when it ISN’T their top-choice “partner,” they know it. Just the other day, I found out my soulmate had a one-night stand with some random woman during a party. He didn’t care for that woman.

    In other words, if he at the least shared some feelings, then perhaps it is real. However, if he pulls the dissapearing act like he is Houdini (or starts to distance himself real fast), pull away and get ready to move on. Don’t fall for a Libra man if you have even the slightest feeling that it won’t last so long. It hurts.

  2. …read the last 50 threads …this blog is absorbing …wish I’d jumped in a month ago

    …wonder what sign none! is (ya, I know sooooo 70’s)

    …LibraLady didn’t catch your Venus in Sign

    …George, how often did you need to make the decisions? …what’s the deal, here? …how often did you have to choose between her peppermint and spearmint toothpaste? 😉 …and did you ever get away with telling her to just brush her teeth already? …lmao

    …had an Aries dad/Libra mom …sounds like you did what he did …do your own thing, and ignore her …problem – that normally means someone else gets stuck being the conduit of communication

    …twolibrasbefore …that “parenting” comment is a gem …had me a Libra gal that I co-mingled with tell me that she’s never having kids because “she needs a man to take care of her” – classic …that part about “wonderful, gentle, and caring” is relative …they do their best imitation of whom they “think” June Cleaver is …been floatin’ around this site, and they say Pisces plays games …the scales can be a master at using jest to peck at the intellect …they’ll even prepare you to cook up a wonderlic test that those Twins, Vulcans, and Water-bearers won’t pass …lastly, you forgot #17 – they love to use guilt, but they’ll have a conniption if made to feel guilty

    …Pisces Queen …how did your scales fair against the scales? …were you constantly bending to his whims?

    …Teddy, a Libra admitting their failures – that’s just perfect (I couldn’t help myself) 😛

    …Virgo Diva, be nice …a lot of Libras have personal planets in your sign …they go hot and cold – its part of their process of being selective …take it from a Pisces that didn’t make the Virgo cut (O.o) …Librans eventually want to select everything available to them on the shelf

    lessdistractedlibra, what’s your Venus? (missing from your list) …”emotional weaponry”??? …don’t make me 🙁 …reading on, you make it sound like Libra needs re-programming in order to be functional, or adopt new stance …(I can understand your fascination with Virgo …who better to undertake the task than Mr. Roboto)

    all jockeying aside, ladies if you know your Venus, and would be kind enough to share… I’d be indebted… (personal reasearch)

    Aquarius, Moon in Gemini
    Virgo, Moon in Gemini
    Leo, Moon in Gemini
    Libra, Moon in Gemini

    I’m attempting to discern if the perpetual vacillation exhibited by my Libra interest is caused by her Sun, or Moon in Gemini who have a propensity to latch to me like leeches, or if it’s ’cause I’m that Top Gun known as ICEMAN…

    Thank you…

  3. Chip
    Im Scorpio Rising, Aries Moon and I think Virgo is my Venus…. Why does that matter? My Aqua Guy is Taurus Rising, Gemini Moon and Venus in Pisces, I guess were a strange mix but its working LOL

  4. PS, I was raised by a Cancer man and a Scorpio woman, and my guy was raised by two Scorpio’s…LOL Not much chance to grow up flakey, or able to be indecisive…:)

  5. LL you asked “why”, my list:

    a. There was resonance in what your wrote, and in what twolibrasbefore wrote…

    b. Here goes a sweeping assumption …based on emperical evidence, or consensus amongst astrologers’ text that proliferates various media, well-aspected Moon-Sun combinations suggest a familiarity (or that “soul-mate” quality) for the Moon person towards the Sun …Venus can point to how you behave towards the object of your desire

    c. If I were to surmise – it sounds like you are content to be in a “loose”** relationship, and tlb leans toward stability… she said, “once we (Libra)*** take committment seriously”, and the partner is aware of our “devotion/loyalty”, Libra warms up…

    d. LL, your planetary placements are similar to my mom’s; you sort of echo her sentiments; I’m interested in a Libra, but not in pursuing my mom… (irregardless of what the physche majors out there think!)…

    My dilemma is simple… in my experience, Moon in Gemini are easily influenced, hesitant, and capricious (yes, even the Virgo Sun said that she was always changing her mind)… since I seem to find myself liaising in perpetuum with these particular Moon girls, I was wondering whether this Sun Libra/Moon Gemini combo is going to leave me “out in the cold”… my Venus is in Aries, and hers in Scorpio… I’m getting leery of initiating contact, and would prefer not to rely on my acumen

    does the chase stop? Or do I got to continually pre-heat the oven?

    Lastly, I know that Libras have a tendency to arrive at decisions rationally. Is there ever a time when its predicated on raw intensity?



    **by no means am I advocating that you possess that derogotary quality; normally, I wouldn’t qualify the adjectives I use, but given that text can be taken out of context when I exercise artistic liberty, I felt that I must… ’cause using “airy” as a stand-in, just wouldn’t do either

    ***sounds like Venus in Virgo to me

  6. I kinda need some advice….

    I started hanging out with a libra guy,we got along so well,had fun together went to the movies,kissed,hugged,had sex,hang out,went to museums,went to art galleries,did a lot of awesome things together and stuff but honestly,I started falling in love with him,I did.
    Not in a chessy “I love you,cant live without you ” kind of thing,I am a gemini
    and maybe thats got nothing to do with it,but I am not very romantic,I try though,and I like to hug and kiss and be lovely with the person I care about but thats it,I dont usually go over the top with romance,with me things are easy ,chill…there is romance involved but I dont like it when things get to sofocating,the one thing I do want is honesty and when people are straight forward with me…thats all I ask but whatever,back to where I was.

    I fell for the guy,so I had to tell him because I wanted him to know how I felt right,so I did,I told the libra guy :

    “I am falling in love with you,but im not really expecting anything back,I am falling for you and I like it,if you want me to I can be there for you and love you very much and be your friend,lover,partner in crime,etc,if not,its ok im not gonna get mad or sad or anything,Ill understand”

    and a bunch of other stuff,but after I told him about my feelings for him,he suddenly changed his attitude towards me,he used to be very amorous ,he used to hug me and kiss me more often and all those lovely things couples do…(yes,we slept together a few times…not good,I now)but now he barely touches me,he hugs me but not like before,he never kisses me anymore,he treates me more like well….his friend….
    I am so confused and Im thinking about asking him whats going on,I can be brutally honest and open when necessary and right now I just want him to be honest and straight forward with me but then again I have no idea how to treat this libra man,and how to ask him cause I dont want the guy to feel overwhelmed or something,I just want him to be “fair” and to speak the truth….he is sooo confusing…

  7. ooh and another thing,he suddenly turned cold to me after I told him about my feelings but he has never said anything about anything,I have no idea what he wants from me,what he feels…nothing
    then again everytime we hang out he makes plans for other days,he keeps making plans for us!!!
    he invites me to places,he says things like “when we” go there…or “I have to take you there” or “we have to go to that party”
    stuff like that and I seriously hate this,im starting to feel annoyed by his attitude even if I love the guy hes gonna end up by making me crazy and im gonna back off him i know…and i dont want that,hes a good person and great friend bu tseriously,are all libras like that??
    why the hell cant you make up your mind!!!

  8. Chip
    Hi, it never hurts to pre heat the oven. Right now Im crazy in love with a man that pre heats the oven every other day, if you love her keep pursuing… 🙂

    No, we are not all like that. I’ve never had trouble making up my mind. I love hot not cold and I’d kill or die for those I love. My Libra ex husband was the opposite, he is the “cold” libra type, selfish and cruel, glutunous and perverse, so no 2 libra are the same. My older brother is a hermit libra, and get this, the man I love is an Aquarian, in touch with his feelings and emotions, he’s more emotional then I am, (which is very hard, I’m emotional) so I’m learning that Aquas are all different too. If you meet one Libra that is an a@#%$le it doesnt mean the next will be.

  9. Chip
    Raw intensity? For me you bet! there are many times like that. I cant speak for other Libras but I’ve made snap decisions and didnt regret many, a few times when I listen to other people I regretted it, so I go with my instincts now, so far okay too 🙂

  10. LibraLady says:

    Ias married to a Libra man for 5 years, we’d been childhood friends then dated in high school, years later met up in our early twenties and he was very affectionate. One day he changed. After we were married he stopped being cuddly and became sexually charged, he stopped giving me hugs and kisses and wanted rough sex every day, and I don’t mean once a day, he was never satisfied, not too many men can climax 3 times and are ready again in a half hour but he was, he was “sure” of me now, so why should he try making me happy, right? The more I tried to make him happy, his fave meals, showing interest in his lame video games ect, the more he withheld affection and when I confronted him he said that sex meant the same thing, I found out later that he suspected me of cheating (which was stupid, where would I get the energy?)and that he was trying to exhaust me so I’d stay home (I never went out) After 10 years of divorce I finally asked him, why he thought I was cheating, he said it was because of the way I looked…..Sometimes these boys are not smart, then he said the strangest thing, “I would have cheated on me” Maybe your guy has low self esteem and needs to find out why you care about him the way you do….

  11. LibraLady says:

    Now that he knows that I’ve met my soul mate (my Aquarius man), 10 yrs after our last physical meeting, he told me that he wished he had been able to touch me more often, how he meant that is a mystery, “twice a day wasn’t enough” LOL or if he meant affection wise, I have no clue, but I find that since our breakup he thinks about “us” more, now that there is no “us”
    Maybe your Libra guy needs to see that you won’t live in a clod relationship forever, it’s as if they need that wake up call sometimes (crazy boys)

  12. LibraLady says:

    cold not clod….come to think of it mine was a clod, LOL

  13. Capricorn says:

    I have a Libra friend who I think I am falling in love with. We have been friends for 2 years. We have a friendship and business partner type of relationship. WE do go out both have fun together. He often will buy my dinner or lunch and vice versa. When we are out he talks about “wanting our relationship to work” So far we have a very good friendship but its not to the real dating stage in my opinion. Yet others who see us think we are dating. They see the chemistry between us when we are together. The problem is I guess as a Capricorn I am looking into the future and want to know if we can have a real relationship. He’s said he loves me but it sounds like one uses love in casual conversation. As in you say I love you to someone who does something nice for you. Yet friends have told me they notice he acts jealous when others are around me his tone changes. He seems to be nervous or find an exit. Yet when we are alone or around his friends or collegues he acts very friendly. If alone he will act flirtatious. He will use certain sexual body language to convey a point but in a discrete manner. He also smiles or laughs if I use certain words to tell him how sexy or cute he is. I told him that its hard for me to tell a person how much I love them but rather I use actons. I will often bring him his favorite sweet treats or snacks. Yes I eill go across town just to bring him something just to spend a few minutes in his presence to see his smile or hear his voice. Yet he doesnt call often. If I call though he calls back immediately and will spend a long time talking on the phone about nothing at all. Often giggling or asking me how I am or anything he can do for me. If something happen to upset me or make me mad at him hes devastated. He rushes to fix whatever it is he said or did to make it right. Once he knows its right hes back to being charming and oh so cute.

    So what do I do? Is there a problem here? It just seems its taking forever for this relationship to progress beyond this.

    One other thing Hes 25 and hes Chinese. His family still allows him to live at home as its very common in the culture. Hes often talked about getting his own place or try to convince me to buy a home. Yet I am not sure where its going. Once I know he loves me I want it to work and will love him always.

  14. Im puzzled about the Libra guy I know. He is very Mysterious, but yet a nice guy. I have known him a long long time. He called and ask me if I wanted to date him, he would come we would eat, go to Casino had alot of fun, he would call and text me.
    Once I ask him if he had someone at work, he said work? no. Have one at such and such, a matter of fact two women? S o then he in return said do u have anyone? I said no and to be honest I like you. He got all bent out of shape, said oh thats not possible, I need someone my own age, someone that works same shift as I do and someone different than my mom.
    I thought What??????????????????????
    Why did he ever call in the first place or even come??????????????????????? Always said we were friends. And to this day if you text him that would be a benefit to him he will answer otherwise he wont.
    Dated one in High School that was the same way, and Im in my 50’s now.
    By the way Im a Virgo, Libra has alot of personal planets in Virgo, so we should hit it off well if he was normal. lol
    And when he does answer he is always nice, and tips for me?

  15. Yeah, I should not have gotten involve in a libra male…
    My friend introduced me to him and we all went dancing.
    He gave me a look, (reading through his eyes).. and asked me if i wanted to dance. His friend was like dance with me! and he turned to me and said ” i will dance with you but not her”
    Well anyways we ended up talking and exchanging numbers.. I wouldn’t text him but he would text me in the mornings saying ” hey love :)” So those stopped.. and he went to cali and came back and i saw him at my friends party and was trying to make the moves on me by being sweet.. we did ended up making out and sleeping next to each other, holding each other.. I ended up liking him, but i did not talk to him about my feelings at all. Then he told my friend ” she does not know what she wants and she is giving me mix signals” so i tried talking to him and he was like ignoring it..
    Then i kinda laid off of him but we were still talking and hanging out every now and then. Then I told him about my true feelings for him again then he ignored it and so i was like ok im through!.Told my friend that he wasnt fond of me and thought i was pyscho so I deleted his facebook and his number.. and did not talk to him for three months.. Then he requested me back on facebook and told me ” thanks for deleting me” I replied ( i should not) then we began talking again, and he gave me his new number, so i visited him and we talked and everything seem to go smooth right?
    we texted and i would see him every two weeks so i won’t get emotionally attached.. then i saw him on sunday cause i was bringing him pie..lol then he began flirting while we were watching a movie.. then we were playing and next thing you know he pulled me in to kiss him and i was like no, but we ended up ccleeping with each other.. we got done and asked if i was ok and gave me hugs and kisses and told me next time i will decide… now he is barely texting, so i guess i m going to ignore him again.. everytime i don’t pay him any mind he comes back.. and i know he have other girls he sees.. ugh I need to leave this man alone!!!

  16. ok all you women who do not understand the libra man.i am libra and when it comes to love we only want one thing and thats someone who can show affection at the spontanious moments during anytime of day. we want someone to leave us a short note to say ive been thinking of you and cant wait to tell you. we want someone who is not afraid to put their arms around us out un public. we want a lady who does appriciate the things we do each day that surprises you. not to be taken for granted. our love is not like any you have ever known. you draw us in by your reactions on a daily clock thats ticking. when we feel as though you do not want to be with us we are quite cold. we need the love that you so want to recieve too.hope i wasnt to harsh. me and my wife are both libras and for the past twenty years she continues to be my life line. i think of her each day knowing she is doing the same. we all need space but when are feeling down or need a friend to talk too we know exactly where to look. if you dont have that then keep libra far from your relationships because its hopeless.

  17. Sorrowful Sagittarius says:

    Hi Everyone,

    I’m a Sagittarius woman married to a Libra man. We’ve been together for 6 years and married for 1.5 years. I’ve always loved my man to death and shower him with love & affection & he showers me the same, but when we are apart he can’t be trusted. Our charts are very compatible (Me: Sagittarius Sun/Moon, Capricorn Venus/Rising — Him: Libra Sun, Aquarius Moon, Virgo Venus, Scorpio Rising), so why can’t we get along anymore?

    He always seems preoccupied with other women, but he has no reason to. I’m 10 years younger than him and keep myself looking good at all times. After all this time together, I still go out of my way to look good for him and myself. He does suffer from a low self-esteem and I always make sure to tell him how HOT he is to me, but he still seems to need the attention from other women.

    He works with the public and is VERY flirtatious and constantly crosses the line between innocent flirting and outright betryal. These woman are often ugly, overweight, have tons of kids and are desperate for attention. I guess it makes him feel like a hero or something, but it makes me feel like crap. A friend advised me to let him do his thing and see how he will get bored of it when he realizes it has no effect on me anymore, but I just can’t do that. He’s mine and I’m his and he should act like a married man and grow up already (he’s 42).

    Another major problem I have with him is that he is a habitual liar. He NEVER admits to any wrong-doing even when I have it in black and white (such as phone records and credit card statements). He always denies everything and will try to justify his actions by claiming that I cause him to do these things by spying on him. I only spy because I don’t want him to make a fool of me. He knows I require the ABSOLUTE TRUTH at any cost, no matter how much it hurts, just as I always give to him. He also knowsI’m always 5 steps ahead of him, so why does he even try to get away with his disloyalty?

    I love him very much and have done things for him that neither of his ex-wives EVER did (such as quit my job to take care of his sick elderly mother) and he always acknowledges this, so why does he keep hurting me so much? I’m fed up and ready to leave him, but I just want to see if anyone has any advice that I haven’t tried yet. There’s SO much more to my story, but I think this is long enough for now 🙂 Thank you for listening!

  18. Hi David,

    I like your points of view. 😛 Thanks for sharing. I have met a libra man online, we’ve talk almost every day, we’re both introverts and share the same birthday. I wonder if we make a good couple.

  19. Hi Sorrowful Sagittarius,

    If you really love your husband, don’t give up on him. 🙂

    I wish you more patience, strength emotionally and spiritually. Pray and let God worry.

  20. LIbraLady says:

    Sorrowful Sagittarius
    Your guy sounds like a typical Libra guy. They want to be needed, pretend you need him sometimes. They thrive on that. You’ve been good to him so I doubt very much he’ll leave you for anyone else, he just wants to feel like your man…My Aqua fiance needs me to be weak sometimes, he loves to feel like he rescued me…. Guys love that LOL its a game, I pretend to be lost and he takes me home. Then sometimes I pull him out of the jam, he doesnt mind as long as I act all girly and make him feel strong…..We know we’re strong, but we can’t expect guys to like it, they need to be needed…So do we, sometimes 🙂 Good luck

  21. I have been talking by email for several months with a Libra. He has called me a few times, but it is like pulling teeth for him to do so. He sends me beautiful poetry and songs and says he misses me and sends me hugs and that he thinks about me often. He even said he loves me. The problem is, everytime I say how I feel, he gets cold, but then assures me he loves hearing it and that it makes him feel wonderful to tell him how I feel and that I can never say too much. I feel passionately in love with him and it is hurting me so much. He will say he is calling on a certain day, then doesn’t. I will go for weeks not hearing his voice. I feel like I am in love with a computer. He has quit emailing me at all, and I will not email him anymore. I miss him. The last time I talked to him was 5 days ago and I said I had to go (I was on vacation) and would call him back (and I did a few hours later and he still hasn’t called back).. Would he get that offended by me having to let him go? I had a crush on him in high school (40 years ago) and have never forgotten about him. Also, he only talks about himself; never asks about me or my life and if I write about it, he doesn’t comment. It hurts. Please help me know how to handle this man. Will he come back???? I am a Leo. He is 2,000 miles away. He has said he is coming to see me. Also, no picture on Facebook. I have several other men wanting to be with me and admiring me, but all I think about is him. He owns my feelings. He also says he doesn’t have a computer (uses one at work) and didn’t answer when I ask if he has a cell phone. HELP

  22. Dear Jana,

    Been through the similar. But this is what I’ve done: I asked myself, What’s the point of being with someone who doesn’t want to know about me as I want to know about that special someone? Or, what’s the point of staying in a relationship with someone I can’t even communicate with? So we broke up (I initiated the break up).

    It’s not easy, I know, especially when we fall in love passionately with someone. I guess it’s not going to be easy at first (no one likes breaking up, whether you are the dumper or the dumpee), but it’s been 2 months now since we broke up and I feel a lot happier and have more energy to be put on more productive and positive things in other areas of life.

    I’m not saying that I would jump into another relationship straightaway even if I meet someone nice, but really, the break up was worthed for me and my self-esteem.

    For the first few weeks after we broke up, I did thought of the possibility of getting back together, of how I might be able to do more to better the relationship, of what I should do or what I shouldn’t do, and etc, but then I kind of force myself to not rethink my decision. And it was the best resolve ever for me, because I found what I really am looking for in a relationship: sincere willingness to communicate with each other and to care for each other.

    Just sharing my recent ‘happening’ 🙂 Good Luck

  23. Sassy Sagittarius says:

    Dear Jana,

    Stop chasing this man. Stop waiting around for this man. Destroy all his emails and block him from ever contacting you again! Trust me, you’ll be better off for it. He is just using you to boost his own selfish ego. See, by him making you feel special, he’s the “hero” or “Knight in Shining Armor”. By him flattering you with sweet compliments, he gets to feed off the sweet compliments that you give to him in return. I’m sure he knows you’ve liked him forever, so whenever he needs an ego boost, he knows where to find you…desperately awaiting his “Godliness”. It’s all about HIM and always will be! Libras are LIARS!!! Obviously, you can see what bad liars they are too. They put absolutely no thought into anything, unless it involves their own happiness. The reason his emails stopped was most likely A) He found someone “better” or B) Because his wife or significant other found the emails and now he’s promising them the moon and stars and swearing that he’s going to change for them. He’s got to be a good boy just until the heat is off him and then he’ll be back to his lying, cold-hearted, bastard ways. The reason I know this is I’ve played out this scenario with my soon-to-be ex-Libra man time and time again, and trust me, he’s only playing games with you. If he is indeed married or involved with someone long-term, he’ll NEVER leave her for you, guaranteed. He’s too much of a coward. I have yet to meet a Libra man who is honest, loyal, unselfish and actually cares about who I am, where I come from and where I hope to end up. Move on or you’ll just be another one of his eternal playthings. I don’t know about you, but I plan to stay FAR FAR away from Libra men forever!

  24. sassy sagittarius,

    Thanks so much for the advice. You are right-on, I am sure. He did actually call last night, but no emails for over a week. Talked about himself. I think he may have someone at his work now and that is why he quit emailing, since he only emails me at work. I was so devastated about him not emailing that I barely wanted to talk to him. He ALWAYS emailed me daily, usually several times. He said he was busy at work ALL WEEK and didn’t have time to do one email. Then he commented several times how he laughed all the time and joked around with his female co-workers. I guess he found time to do that!!! I won’t email him again this week for sure and see what happens. I don’t know that I can totally let him go right now, but I am trying. He never compliments me, I oompliment him. Your letter was very sweet and thoughtful and very good therapy for me. I feel better after reading it, thanks so much

  25. Sassy Sagittarius says:

    Dear Jana,

    I’m glad you really got what I was saying. I’m not trying to hurt your feelings or make you feel dumb, because you’re not. You’re just under the spell of a Libra. He is a major flirt, so he’s probably “had” a bunch of women at his job, (and anywhere else he goes)if you know what I mean. I still think he’s involved with someone, whether at work or not, so I wouldn’t even accept any of his calls either. Libras are seldomly single. They will get together with anyone just to avoid being alone. Please just try to let this one go. I’d hate to see another woman go through all the pain that I’ve experienced over the years caused by Libra men. If you’ve been with one Libra, you’ve been with them all. They are ALL the same. I dated enough of them to know this. Then I made the BIGGEST mistake of my life and married one! Only, I didn’t really know anything about Astrology, except what sign I was, until a few years ago. It makes me sick to think of all the heartaches I could have avoided if I’d just known more about it back then! You still have a chance to escape, since you’re not physically together. But if you let this man come and “visit” you, you’ll be forever trapped in his web of lies! Why do you think he doesn’t want to give you his cell #? Because his wife probably pays the bill and will see all his little “secret” phone calls to his many victims (don’t think you’re the only one he’s buttering up). He obviously doesn’t think you’re worth disrupting his perfect little life over, so forget him! Run away Jana, and don’t look back!

  26. Sassy Sagittarius says:

    Dear Heidi and Libra Lady:

    Thank you for your kind words. I apologize for the delayed response, but your emails were in my spam folder. I am sad to inform you that things did not work out for my Libra man and I. I can’t take any more of his lies and “forgetting” his wedding ring all the damn time. He has very deep issues that he will not confront, nor seek therapy to overcome them. There was a wonderful webinar that I had signed us up for over the weekend from MarriageSavers.com and he refused to watch it with me. He just wanted to relax and watch our fave show in the bedroom. We have seen every single episode of this show, since we own the dvd sets and to him, that was more imortant than saving our marriage. I told him that I give up and am not doing one more thing to try to make things work. I mean really, how hard is it to sit thru a 60-minute webinar, when you don’t seem to mind spending hours upon hours on the damn computer looking at filthy whores all day long anyway???? I was the only one doing anything & everything to try to save our marriage and for what? My kindness was being mistaken for weakness by him, but now he knows first hand how brutally unkind I really can be when I lose respect for someone. Now I’m just focused on myself and my own happiness. Screw him. I’m an awesome person and I deserve so much more than this, especially from him. But thanks again ladies! I wish you the best of luck in your new relationships 😉

  27. George says:

    Loving a libra is like inviting a vampire into your home. They are very interesting. However, once they are in your house (heart) you are in big trouble.

    Aries Man married to Libra Woman for many years.

  28. Christine says:

    We met September 23rd and today is our official 8 month anniversary. Not that either one of us pays much attention to that anymore…He is a very simple man. One I am grateful for. Because I am NOT a simple woman. It took me months to understand him. At first, I wasn’t even certain I wanted to. He has a slow, Southern drawl learned from him parents. He dosen’t make decisions… He “deliberates”. Libra born and bred – he must have a deviant ascendant sign or something.
    He is not unfaithful – though he does like the look of a fine woman. He wouldn’t know Venus De Milo if she walked up and gave him a kiss. He would enjoy it – he just dosen’t have any idea what “fine arts” is. He’s not even sure he wants to know. He hasn’t been in a library in 15 years. Really.
    He is quiet. And shy. Though, he prefers to be in a group of people – than hanging out at home. I was convinced it would never work.
    He prefers to mountain climb and hunt and fish and the things I’m passionate about -leaves him scratching his head in confusion. Luxeries? Fine Arts? Pish. Not for this Libra… He finds his “luxeries” in his 4×4 and a dirt road down. “Fine Art” is climbing steep rocks to get to the best fishing spot. He does not cook.
    His “womenfolk” always did that. Grocery shopping consists of twinkies and cheetohs and a 12 pack of Mountain Dew.
    And – for this chatty, hyper, independent, art loving Aquarian…. I was convinced it would never – not ever – work.

    That dark September night the first time I met him I knew it wouldn’t.

    This man was FAR to slow for me. I would run him over. I was sure I certainly THOUGHT to fast for him!

    I couldn’t have been more wrong.

    His slow, careful speech conceals a razor sharp mind and a true – um – “fairness” of thought that is trully….
    Well… Beautiful. And – not found in many men. He “deliberates” – but once reaching a decision he sees it through. I can respect that. The minute he got up to walk to the bar – that first night – I knew there was something more. He is not slow. He is fast – and graceful – and sure footed. He moves like a cat.

    He scales those steep rocks… And it is I that is found limping along after him.

    His calm and quiet person reflects one that is deeply, subliminaly connected to those around him. Our greatest battle sometimes is not that I’m hyper and he is not – but rather he finishes conversations I didn’t know I started.
    And – he dosen’t understand why I can’t. It is I that is stumbling along, confused -in the dark after him.

    I am not used to that…. I am the one that usually leads – and leaves many men not sure what to do with me.

    He picks up on “signals” that have often left me awestruck.

    He has proven himself just as strong and independent – and just as stubborn as I am.

    You see… I don’t know why…. But – he didn’t want to let me go either. He, too, saw something else in me.

    And, after 8 months – today – I can tell you that I am deeply, trully, madly in love with my beautiful, sensual, wonderful Libra.

    It hasn’t all been peaches and cream and roses of course…. He can be bossy – and unknowingly cruel. And, so can I.

    This morning – he said it. I know what he meant when he said it made it worse… He said it.

    Go**amn, he said, I love you.

    This simple, rough, mountain man has taught me more about love – and what it means – and how it feels….
    Then any “fine art, book reading, luxery loving” man out there. He could teach Don Juan a thing or two – or sixty. And, as we both reach upper middle age –
    that’s saying alot. Perhaps because of our experiences. Because we are both mature individuals. We have both loved – and lost. We have both been hurt – badly. We are both afraid… We both lead our own active, busy lives… But we hate being apart. But – we love. And, I know part of it is not what makes us the same. It is what makes us different. That’s balance for you.

    This Sunday, I am supposed to be busily doing laundry, housework – grocery shopping… I find I am happier doing nothing. He will be busily doing his own thing with his daughter – fishing maybe. He left me this morning thinking I “had things to do”. Little does he know. I am on the computer – still loving him.

    This little Aqua girl still has a few tricks up her sleeve…. LOL But – I think tonight – I will cook him my famous fettucine alfredo. Because I love him. LOL And – I will show him. He does not play games and it disappoints him when I do. This simple man just wants my love. And – needs me to show it – alot. That is not hard.

    Independence, a strong mind – and a willingness to give yourself up to love – entirely. His “soul mate”? Perhaps not…
    I’m not certain that even exists. His “perfect partner”? No. But – he is still here – and tonight – he will be eating my fettucine – and loving me. 🙂

    Perhaps giving up on love…. Was the smartest thing I could have ever done. It was only then – that I found it.

  29. please donot mix being a jerk and being a libra together. some of these articles that i have read clearly indicate that these men are just plain ass holes. i am a libra female speaking from libra perspective, yes we can be really cold, it is sad to say, but it is in our make up. what will makes our personality so up and down it will depend highly on the relationship. like david says if you come across like you are not really into us this is when we grow cold. and do you blame us at this point. yes we are flirtatious but it only serves as an ego booster. we believe in space and giving space, we are not clingy, which i think anyone can appreciate. we are very expressive so if we start telling you indirectly that you are out the door you should take it for face value, meaning clean up your act or it is over. but most importantly we are really sweet, refine,expressive, hospiltality orientied people. we are just unique or perhaps weird as some may put it. but once you go libra it will be a memorable experiece. we are surely more mental than physical, please dont be overly emotional or controling, or insecure these type do not match with the masculine sign.

  30. lady t,

    Thanks for the insight. I may have blown it with my Libra male friend. He won’t email me at all. Last message he sent, he said he would call and we would have fun. Going on two weeks, no call, no email. He said he missed me and was thinking of me in the last email as well. I don’t know what to do; if I should try to call him, or what? I miss his emails terriby. I can’t get him out of my mind. I really care for him and thought he cared for me. I sent him a beautiful poem I wrote about him last night, was that a mistake???? I am a little worried now. He is into poety and music. I have read that they want you to tell them how you feel, but it seems like that backfires on me with him.

  31. LIbraLady says:

    You flatter us way too much, LOL, I’ve met more Scorps and Aquas that act like vampires then us Librans. BTW, once someone gets into a Libras heart, its trouble for them too. Unfortunatley, our logic goes out the window while our hearts torture us. There are 2 kinds of Libra women, those who have had their heart broken in the past and those who will in the future.

  32. hey everyone hurtinscorps is changing his name to HAPPYSCORPS!

  33. Librans like to flirt and are insecure. Some of them like to collect admirers or they don’t even notice how much they flirt with you. They really flirt with everyone!

  34. juniper says:

    If I have made a Libra male really angry — what should I do? We have had a strange kind of relationship…long distance but talk for hours and hours on the phone with a few visits…but he says because we are both coming out of relationships we both might need space. (He may be seeing someone else and is evasive— but I think it’s for convenience because he says he is lonely). He says he loves me and was planning another trip to see me when I gave him a good piece of my mind about having someone else around. He sits on the fence alot. He says the things I said were “unkind” and he would call me back when he calmed down. He has not called back yet and think he’s passive-agressively punishing me. But i think it struck a nerve because it was the truth. What do you Libras think?

  35. Juniper,

    I was in a relationship (long distance) with a Libra man. I think they want their cake and eat it too….. If he quit contacting you, then it is probably over. Same with mine. Even if he did contact me, it would take so long and I would be so hurt, it was hardly worth it. He said he would call then wouldn’t and go for weeks and not contact me at all. In the beginning we emailed each other constantly every night. It was gradual but I hear nothing from him now. I finally don’t even care, because I deserve better. Libras usually have several women and one they will never part with making us secondary. It all started when he got upset with me about something and from that point on it was pretty much over. This is a man, although I never got to be with him, I was totally loyal to and could think of no other. If a Libra wants you, you will know it….from what I have read. Good luck to you, I hope he calls soon. They are sensitive and peacemakers and moody. You probably got his “scales” off-balance and that takes a while to overcome.

  36. Hey, Can someone please help me, this is absurd but I met a guy online, another Libra which I keep attracting, we had been talking extensively for 2 weeks or so on the phone, email, chat etc… had a date lined up, I stupidly on the tuesday text and said I no longer wished to do online dating, then he text back saying is that what you really want, I really like you lets still meet on friday – this was yesterday, and he then DID NOT bother to contact me to arrange meeting me. Will I hear from him again? He has not been on line for 2 days, so whether something has happpened I am not sure, but feel disappointed, and a bit angry that I initially sent that text in the first place cancelling. We got on like a house on fire, so much in common…. Everyone that knows me knows I do not need online dating, but duty calls, when you meet so many flaky men in public LOL… I do not know what to do. Have I hurt his feelings, is this the point of no return, where he is thinking, analysing, there is someone else…. I really want to speak to him, but being stubborn appears to be one of my traits, and I do not chase men !! HELP… any ideas would be grateful…. he is 16 October 84, there is 6 years age difference, me being older !…. thanks !.

  37. Lovely_June_Baby says:

    Ummmmm point blank period, LIBRAS may start out just wanting to keep their options open and be honest and single. And me being a cancer, I appreciate honesty over anything. So if you talking to somebody then fine, just let me know. BUT!!!! where they start becomming LIARS is when they will make you feel like the only girl they talking to, want to spend tons of time talking to you, tell you ya’ll have a “special relationship” going on. try to kiss you and stare you in the eyes and let you know they care about you but you know what, it’s not romance, it’s MANIPULATION!!!! because before you know it them mutha fukas get missing and then wanna say, “Oh I kinda met this person and we been talking, you said always be honest right?” but the thing is, they BEEN talking to that person and they feel guilty so they tell you but dont make a big deal out of it. Well tell me, if YA’LL been talking WTF were we doing then?????? bunk of punk ass womanizers that @ the most are closet homosexuals. I will NEVER waste my time, intellect and genuine attention on a Libra again, And I’m telling you right now I don’t give a HOOT who is a libra, married to a libra or whatever and doesn’t like this post. My point is they paint a certian picture and then it turns out to be something else, I’d rather a man, like a bold ass Aries or even a Leo just tell me what it is between us than PRETEND to create this big love affair with me and want all this cake cookies n shit on the side. That’s just RUDE.

  38. @ lovely_june_baby


    I hate him (libra guy) for being like that.

  39. This is interesting. I’m involved with a libra man. I love the “don’t scare the kid inside” advice… very true. I learned not to get into any debats when emotions are high. I’m a capricorn with a pisces in venus, aries in mars, aqua moon. If I get sucked in, immediately blow up on him, then he’s extremely hurt, sulking & I have to deal with that — apologies, him:”let’s end it, I can’t stand hurting you, no matter how hard I try I can’t stop making you angry”. It’s like a tornado whipped through my house & now I have serious wreckage that wasn’t there before. I just let him have his rant & be done with it. Don’t allow yourself to get sucked into the scale balancing drama. He needs space at that point. I don’t know what mine is doing one day to the next. I live my life completely independent of him, but tell him I need him all the time (I really don’t). He’s so moody, I’m not sure how much I can take some days. Right now he’s on a “break”. Good enough for me. I need the break too. Regardless of how they say cappys are jealous. I don’t care if he sleeps around… he keeps coming back to me & he’s a lot of fun so whatever. I like the good times & the sex!!! 🙂

  40. Learn how to stop taking their mood swings personal & their need for space. I think that’s where too many people start to hurt in relationships with libra men. It will hurt if you enter that zone. I know. I’ve been there. Focus when it starts & stop yourself. They pick up on it & if they feel they are hurting you the guilt sets in & they’re GONE. You gotta be strong with these guys. It’s OK to haul off & confront them when you need to. Just say “I don’t think you’re seeing the big picture” & then follow it up with “you’re not being fair”, works *almost* every time. I just wonder when he’s going to catch on I make the same statement every time. Sometimes they just need to take a nap & sit around a bit. Start talking about something like art or your hobbies, get his mind to relax. If it’s really bad, he will be gone for a while. It doesn’t always mean he’s cheating & if he is… there’s nothing in your power to stop him. It’s kinda what you signed up for with this guy. Some don’t cheat… not every libra cheats & men from every sign cheat. If you look for something hard enough & long enough, you’ll convince yourself it exists or even cause it. Stablize yourself because once the wind starts blowing, you need to grab hold of something so it doesn’t knock you down!!

  41. seagoat,

    You hit the nail on the head with the “you’re not being fair”, I figured that out, about three years into my marraige with my beautiful Libra wife, that pharse used properly works everytime. You say that and shut up……let the Libra stew and think….and think…..

    ………….hours or days later they will come back and say “you have a point….maybe your right” I was not fair…..of course it is hard not to smile……….when you hear those words………with a Libra you can argue your point……but never lose your temper….

    Aries Husband 🙂

  42. @George and seagoat,

    I cringed a bit when you wrote the ploy, “you’re not being fair”… I’m a Pisces, and most would say that pulling strings falls under my jurisdiction… that response is a form of manipulation…

    for a Libra to make a decision, it’s painstaking… it’s one thing to point out a rational flaw in their argument… it’s another thing to let go emotionally, and direct it at them… but, is it fair when you get a Libra to second-guess based on their nature? Is it fair that you’re looking for a desired outcome, and when Libra doesn’t deliver it, you ask, “is it fair to me?”?

    My dad is Arien, and my mom is Libran… is it fair that my dad would undermine my mother’s decisions so that he could either step in and make a new one for her, or step away while she was “thinking… thinking… thinking…” so he could persue his own agenda in classic Arien style?… is that fair, George?…

    with all candidness, seagoat, when you play the “fair” card, are you not guilting a Libra?

    I’ve a Libran son… it’s a really selfless sign in many respects… even when they crave their lil goodies, it’s not really being selfish, it’s indulgence… even when they dress, they dress as much to spotlight you, as they do for their own appearance… they include you in their ideals… they try to infect you with their smile… I think they’re more than fair…

    I was interested in this Libra girl about one year ago… I know that I’m a bit much to handle… and she wasn’t looking for high maintenance… I invested time, money, and took the initiative… she fought her urges and impulses (there was a physical relationship, but no effort towards a spiritual bond and growth)… easily, I could’ve outlined “this is what we share”, and asked, “is it fair to me?”… but, I didn’t… not because I wasn’t clever enough, but because it wasn’t fair to her… she had already decided she did not want to soul search with me…

    with Libra, if you don’t want them to go cold, you need to respect their decisions… the moment you don’t, and they judge where they stand in your mind, they get cold…

    George, just out of curiosity, how often have you said to your wife, “I am not being fair to you”… my dad is going on 40 years with my mom, never heard him mutter it once… I dated a Sun Aries/Moon Libra for one year and we were friends for a second… guess what?… she knew that I didn’t get treated fairly on numerous occasions…

    Libra cold… IDK… God knows that they try not to be…

  43. George - Aries Dad & Husband says:


    The “is it fair” card is not manipulation.

    It is a specific relationship tool.

    My Libra wife and I get a time out…..allowing me not to get sucked too deeply into a point of discussion where I would allow my emotions to cause me to lose objectivity and maybe hurt my wife’s feelings (which I care deeply about).

    She now has a moment that allows her critical thinking mind to disengage from me, the space and time to think and analyze all of the issue and their permutations.

    Aries people do not always have the patients to go through hashing out ideas in all there possible parameters.

    We analyze very quickly, taking in lots factors simultaneously and rapidly presenting answers/solutions.

    Doing this in a direct conversation with a Libra, in a rapid fashion, can be quite irritating for them…..perceived as rude…..uncaring…

    So it is a GOOD thing to disengage…..and show courtesy to your Libra spouse…..Libras value good manners…..not just in public…but also in the privacy of home…..even though they love to argue a point….they like harmony in the family and at home….

    So, Chip, an Aries can not be like a Libra. However, if they love their spouse they will develop strategies/tools which meet their goal of Love and there spouse’s goals of Love & Harmony.

    As husband and father, I want my wife and children to be happy and relaxed at home.

    Aries husband 🙂

  44. George, you skillfully avoided the question… have you ever confessed to your wife that you’d been unfair?

    btw, what you write, reads good… as it echoes in my head it sounds good… but, my spider-sense is tingling… lol

    I understand the Libra’s goal, harmony… I also can grasp the Arien concept, “do not poison the well at home”… practically, speaking… my mom is a Moon in Aries… the only time my father would stand at attention is when he got lambasted (pun intended)…

    then, again, if “…are you being fair?” is an agreed upon technique in your household… and it works… who am I to refute it…

    in my household, if my dad said it to anyone, we’d be p!ssing our pants laughing… if he insisted on making a point of it, in all due fairness, he’d be riddled with bullet holes, rapid fire…

    I’m fully aware that the Arien father will remove himself because he wants a “peaceful homebase”… my ex was the same way… isn’t that your attraction and love of Libra… they bring peace after you’ve waged a long war elsewhere?…

    Libra can handle quick thought… what they can’t handle is the injection of emotion alongside it… too much to weigh…

    like I inferred, you may be a different Aries… my father never would’ve admited openly or in public that he loved his wife… maybe it’s his generation, ethnicity, but he’s cowardly in that way… although, he shows you by what he does… you must have a planet tempering you…

    I’ve never seen Libra as cold… even when they don’t like you, they’re diplomatic, but if you’re listening, their message is clear…

    “is it fair?”… personally, I think they’ve accorded your opinions with theirs as best they can in their conclusions… two, I want their emotional feedback, and not “thinking… thinking… thinking…” all the time… three, they’ll rehash a comment without you using word association…

    …and I think I’ve mentioned this before on this thread …while Aries is cooling down, and letting their rational mind prevail, there’s usually someone else dealing with, and soothing Libra’s proclivity to fret

    …that’s how it works in my house …can’t speak for anyone elses

    interestingly, Libra employer after 5 years, tracks me down on FB… he knew he terminated me unfairly over a dispute… I didn’t have to ask him… he didn’t have to verbalize it… and they’re not cold… not really, if you think about it… like they do…

  45. George - Aries Dad & Husband says:


    Yes, I just admitted I was unfair with my wife on Sunday….we were sight seeing and she was explaining the history of something but was confusing one part of history with another and I corrected her….. . 🙁 Without being diplomatic about it.

    She said nothing and let it go…..However; I knew I had been unfair in my criticism. About 15 minutes later I pulled my wife aside and told her I had been unfair ….and could see why she mixed to two different periods in history…..then we went on to have a lovely discussion about the two different periods in history……..

    Aries Dad out 🙂

  46. hey Aries Dad, I appreciated your candid reply, but would not expect anything less.. 🙂

    I’m finding more and more as everyone contributes on these threads that even with their sun signs everyone is really within their own universe…

    your Libra is fortunate if you have the ability to set aside your natural predisposition to appease hers… my familial Libras are not so lucky…

    as I said, I prefer to encourage them to stay steadfast in their decisions because they will inevitably run into individuals who are less kind in their approach/conduct than you… and they do waiver when you question their fairness…

    Jerry Rice, a Libra, in his induction speech iterated that he was “driven to achieve by fear of failure”, and that he “didn’t want to disappoint the important people in his life”… for me, an emotion like fear or disappointment is a contaminant… and I can see how “…are you fair?” can lead to their apprehension, or “am I disappointing you?”, or “I’ve failed you” makes them feel bad…

    as an Aries, you likely have no problems creating a mess, identifying that mess, and cleaning it up…

    as a Pisces, I’m attempting to avoid the mess entirely… or I’m thinking, “this is going to be messy, do I want to clean it up?”… or “this is going to be messy, and they should clean it up”…

    if we both need space, I would bear the brunt, and say, “my mind is not in a position to discuss this further, it’s clouded/preoccupied with emotion”…

    if my mind was sound, I have no qualms articulating, “these are the flaws in your rationale (pros/cons), I would like you to reconsider your stance”… if their debating skills are as effectual as we are lead to believe, they should have no issue countering, or conceding…

    in your case, the “unfair” adjective seems to be used genuinely to improve communication… I was sort of interested in seagoat’s response… she’s a bit more calculating… I think her intention with “unfair” is solely different…

    btw, Eminem is a Libra, and I don’t think he’ll ever be accused of being politically correct… his persona is cold and vulgar… is he the exception? 😉

    same sign, multi-universes…

  47. Chip,

    One thing is for sure…………Libra’s are loaded with talent…..look at the skier Bode Miller or Brett Favre, Both of them make me smile because they are typical Libra’s…..they make the sports writers crazy with their behavior….and I think to myself, what do you expect they’re Libras….:-)

    “as an Aries, you are likely to have no problem creating a mess, identifying that mess, and cleaning it up…”

    Chip this statement is spot on….you have me begged….this is true Aries behavior…

    We love to slay dragons….

    You are right about the fear thing and Libras…..

    The life goal of emotional evolution for a Libra is to not be afraid,

    and the life goal of emotional evolution for an Aries is to love unconditionally…..I am working on this…..;-)

    Aries Dad……

  48. pegged….opps….

  49. oops…again….;-)

  50. Favre… he’s a good example… he went back for the camaraderie of the team… he’s a classic air sign… when they say, “IDK”… they mean it… it’s not like earth or water… IDK can mean I have a good idea, but am not telling you, yet…

    2 weeks ago, met a Libra… we really hit it off… strangely, she was up front… saying, “oh, I really had fun”… me: “so, you’d give me your number?”… she does, that mischievous smile thing… so, I say, “you know it won’t work, I’m a Pisces”… she repsonds, “ya, I believe in the astrology, when’s your b-date?”… it happened to coincide with her X’s, so you can imagine where her head is at… so, I want to cut out, and suggest that she finds a pen, and to write her number on my hand… she enquires, “why don’t you program it into your phone?”… I wink, “I’m too drunk to push your buttons. Why don’t you take mine. Plus, I know you want call”…. in predictable Libra fashion, she eloquently replies, “I typed in your number; I’ll call you in 20, so that you can store it.”… I know Libra (like their counterpart Aries), a man needs to be a man… I needed to take the initiative, and call if I wanted a date… the opposite would never happen… but, she couldn’t bring herself to announce, “You’re dreaming ! Man up !”…

    Libra is too nice to be cold… even when they blow up at you… they get dispirited because they lost composure… cold should be reserved for the last quarter of the zodiac… the 3 winter signs get downright frigid… lol

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