How to know when a Scorpio doesn’t love you

ScorpioA Scorpio can be cruel to those he loves, so how do you know when he doesn’t love you?

Scorpios can be secretive and manipulative, but they can also be intensely intimate and devoted. Why would they bother hurting someone they didn’t care about? If a Scorpio is seething in resentment, he is still attached to the target of his anger. You can still be emotionally connected to someone without loving them, but if a Scorpio is going to let you in, he’s likely to “love” you in some way; he trusts you enough, after all, to give you access to his inner sanctum. Perhaps Scorpio is confusing “love” with “trust,” but any Water sign feels loving in a safe relationship.

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About Jeffrey Kishner

Jeffrey Kishner is founder and publisher of Sasstrology. He is a licensed mental health counselor and has been doing astrological counseling since 2001. Jeffrey has been published in print magazines including The Mountain Astrologer and Dell Horoscope, and has written online for sites including AOL, Tarot.com and StarIQ. Jeffrey has also been heavily involved in the astrology blogger community. Read his personal blog at JeffreyKishner.com.

Comments

  1. I am a Scorpio male with 9 inches of advice. If you can make nine disappear, then so will both our problems.

  2. Scorp man says:

    I am a Scorpio male with 9 inches of advice. If you can make nine disappear, then so will both our problems.

  3. Scorp

    that means?…

  4. I think Scorp man is talking about the length of his tool.

  5. Talk about “” advice!!!

    But then again what do you expect from a sexually frustrated Scorpio who obviously
    isn’t getting his just deserts.!!!

    Cheers and keep smiling Taurus.!!!

  6. I wonder what time it is in America right now.???

    Here in Australia it is 9.15pm Good Friday the 29th of March.

    Curious about the time difference.???

  7. I wonder what time it is in America right now.???

    Here in Australia it is 10pm Good Friday the 29th of March 2013.

    Just wondering about the time difference.???

  8. I need advice please I’m a leo with cancer traits my ex is a scorpio and we ran back into each other I thought he wanted me back at first he and I are staying with each other when he came to pick me up he didnt tell me he had another girl friend and he said he loves us both and that he dont want to choose he has told me he still loves me and dont want me to leave I just dont know he spends more time with her than me but when he needs some one to talk to he comes to me I am not sure where I stand and if he really loves me I could really use some advice please.

  9. Korena,

    OMG. Kick his ass. How could you fall in love in 2 person? I am sure it would be different than the other.
    scorpio are upfront to their emotions. So my advice… Ask him those that triggers your mind.

    Once you get the answer. You know what to do…He is not serious with you and the other.

    A smart lady no need for advice if she knows the answer….

    Good Luck!

  10. Hi Korena,

    Has he asked you for a “TRHREESOME” yet.???

    If not you can be sure he is working on it and it is only a matter of “TIME”.!!!

    If you’re into that sort of thing go for it otherwise, you don’t really have much of
    a choice do you.???

    This is a case of “THREE” is company and the more the merrier.!!!

    Cheers and keep smiling. Taurus

  11. Oh my dear dear scorpios…how I, a gemini, LOVE to play mind games with you!

    Mind games & sex…its soo intoxicating but lethal. But you always cum back for more and more until I disapear from your suffocating cage and never look back.

  12. Susannah says:

    I’m a leo woman with cancer in moon and ascendant and met a scorpio man for six months ago. He was very interested in me and showed it to me alot and he friends told me he was to. But I was very hard to get and talked to him a few times but nothing more, until we met a few times and fell for him. And that wasn’t hard for me to do because he was very charming and caring and took his time all the time to write to me or called me. And I always responded to him, but sometimes I could be very cold to him and he told me that but it didn’t stop him to show his affections towards me. But I’m a person who is very hard with love, and I told him that from the beginning. And he told me he was very afraid to get hurt because he had been previous in his life and told me he was scared and didn’t wanted to show to much to me because I may not feel the same for him and hurt him. And I never really told him I liked him or actually loved him, because my feelings grew very strong for him. Just because he was the man who was very affectionate towards me. But the thing was, I craved to much, and he was very afraid to actually show me what I needed sometimes. It could take days without him asking me to meet him or be with him. And that made me very insecure about him because when he told me he missed me but wanted me to show him and ask him that we could met I kept telling me why do he want me to ask him and show him? When he is the man, and he knew I wasn’t the type of girl to asking the man out. Who would? Especially when he knew I always met him when he asked me that. So it was very confusing to me. And when I did once, asked if he could come to a bar me my friend and some friends of his was there. He didn’t. And that hurt me. So I did a very stupid thing and slept in the house of my male friend (that was in love with me and my scorpio man knew that and was very suspicious of him already) and called him and i said very dumb things like that i was going to sleep with my male friend (But I didn’t and I told him that the day after) but that really hurt him. And I was to dumb to realize that he cared. But he did. And he said to me that he wanted to end everything between us, but he didn’t. So I guess he gave me another chance, though I think he didn’t really forget (or forgive) that. But despite that, he asked me to be with him, and I did met him and he wrote me very nice things that he loved me and I was the only girl he wanted to be with. And when I was with him he asked me if I could tell him that I cared, but I told him that I show him that already when I speak to him and being with him. Why does he want me to say it? And he said, it’s nice to hear it sometimes. And asked me if I could say it. But stubborn as I am with emotions sometimes, I didn’t. But don’t get me wrong, I really showed him that I did care. Like once he was trying to make me jealous with another girl and I got very upset. And he said “I know you care” . He could to small things like that just to get me jealous. And sometimes it did get me very jealous and sometimes it didn’t. Because I knew he wanted to play mind games. And I didn’t like that. It made me feel very insecure about him. Even though I knew he liked me and cared for me, cause the thing was even though I said to him that we did not fit eachother and that we should end things (I only said that cause like him I was to afraid to get hurt and afraid that my feelings would go deeper for him, and I was so afraid with that because he was to good to be true sometimes to me) but It could get only hours and then I changed my mind and told him that I really didn’t mean that. Cause I didn’t.. And it was stupid of me to say that to him, cause if he did that to me I would get very hurt.. And sometimes I think that I did really hurt him.. And after some weeks he became very strange to me, and I realized that I did wrong, and that I needed to show him more and actually get my guards down and show that I wanted to be with him. And I did. And he did to. But then he became very distant. And It hurt my feelings cause I really tried to show him and I thought that was the only thing he wanted from me and when I did he didn’t showed that he cared so much for that.. And then I told him that I felt hurt that he didn’t show me that he really cared and that I tried to show him that but it didn’t get somewhere. And he became confused and told me how I could believe that he didn’t care. And he told me that he missed me but wanted to avoid me and thats why he didn’t took his time to be with me. And that hurt me that he wanted to do that, but I knew it was his insecurities and that he was afraid. But he knew that I cared for him so I couldn’t understand why he wanted to do so. And then he didn’t reply to my message, and that was very unlike him, he was the man who always wrote to me or replied to me. But this time he didn’t. And when I called him few days after why we did ignored eachother he told me that he was sick, and didn’t want to take any discussion. And that hurt me to of course, but I didn’t wanted to make a deal of that and told him if he didn’t wanted to be with me anymore. And he said that he didn’t know. But he didn’t wanted to end things between us but he felt like things where going to fizzle out in the sand. But ofcourse it would if he ignored to be with me and met me, and I told him that and he knew he said.. And he said that he wanted to be with me but he was insecure. And I told him that If you want something you show it.. But it didn’t make any difference, and days went and he didn’t text or call me. Which was very unlike the man I fell in love with. But then I told him that I missed him, and he replied and said he wanted to hang out with me. And I became so happy, I thought he finally understood that I cared for him and he for me. And I was with him over the weekend, and he told me that he also had missed me and if I wanted to be with him the day after to and hang out. And I said yes. And we had a very nice time and he was very sweet. And then the day after came, and he didn’t call me or anything. And I became very upset and asked why he didn’t even said that he couldn’t be with me. And days went and he became the same cold person he was the past two weeks, and didn’t text me or called me. And I did the effort to do that, cause I could not let him go and could not understand why he did became distant again. After the time we hang out together and I thought everything was fine. But he wasn’t the sweet affectionate man I fell in love with that would write or call me all the time. No this time he didn’t but I did, even though he responded he was still distant and a bit cold. And it hurt me alot. I thought he was my true love, after all the complicated things we went trough that love conquers all and after all his friends told me he really liked me and cared for me, that this time it was for real. But he became another person to me, and I couldn’t deal with it anymore.. I was very confused and sad, and I talked to his friend about this and he said to me that he was very strange.. and should move on and that maybe we didn’t belong to eachother. And I became so sad because it was his near friend of his, and my scorpio man didn’t care to take his time and tell me that he did cared. So I called him and wanted to confront him about if he stilled cared. And the only thing he said that he didn’t know and that he was unsure. But I took it as a No. And I told him that and then he told me I could take it as I want. But he refused to tell me that he did care or not. And it crushed me because it was then I realized that he didn’t and that it was over. If he did he wouldn’t do so. Then two days ago I get message from his near friend that says he love me (not that “my” scorpio man did, but his friend) and wanted to be with me. And his friend was with my scorpio man at that time. And I thought that was very insulting and confusing that his friend would wrote such things to me when I’m his bestfriends “ex” and especially when he was with him. But after a while I figured maybe “my” scorpio man want to play mind games and told his friend to write me those things. But I don’t understand a thing..

    Does he still care for me? Or he never did.. or maybe I did him wrong?
    I’m so sorry for the long book I almost wrote, lol, but I wanted you to get the whole picture.. I would be very greatful for some answers and advice.. Thank you..

  13. Hi Susannah,

    This Guy sounds very “CONFUSED” and he is “CONFUSING” you in return due to
    the fact that he is either too immature and not in touch with his feelings or he is “GAY”
    and has not come out of the “CLOSET” because he is still at the “EXPERIMENT” faze
    where he is going back and forth from male to female and vice versa in order to define
    and establish his “SEXUAL IDENTY” which is currently in “CRISIS MODE”.???

    Do yourself a favour honey and give him a miss because you deserve a lot better than
    what he has to offer which is “GARBAGE” and you don’t need that because there are
    plenty more fish, crabs and scorpios swimming around in that big ocean waiting for a
    lovely Girl such as yourself whom has her priorities in order and is looking for that special
    someone to “FALL IN LOVE WITH”.

    Just be patient go with the flow and it will happen when you “LEAST EXPECT IT”.!!!

    Cheers be smart and keep smiling Taurus.

  14. Susannah says:

    Hi Karissa! I appreciate much for the answer. You’ve right, he is very immature and has been all this time I’ve known him.. But that he would be Gay didn’t I understand cause he has not been with any male (what I know of..) and has only been with girls. Although he has told me the first time I’ve met him (and he was drunk) that he was BI. So maybe you’ve right! Haha. That would be very funny actually..

    Thank you so much for the lovely words Karissa.. I know I deserve better and there’s plenty other fish in the sea, but the thing is we had a chemistry that would be hard to find in someone else and sometimes I believe maybe it was my fault it turned this way and he just want to hurt me or take revenge cause I’ve hurt him.. But either way it isn’t worth it.

  15. Hi, I’m an aquarius woman in relationship with a scorpio man since last 1 year. It was him who pursued me and told me he loves me. I was reluctant to date him initially but he didn’t give up the chase.After few months of dating and getting to know him better I fell in love with him.He never tried to hide our relationship and proudly introduced me to everyone as his girlfriend.There was no other women issues.He is not a self centered moron that most people make of a scorpio.He is devoted,loyal,romantic and committed to me.Last one year has been a nice and romantic experience.We used to have our arguments and disagreements but it never lasted more than few hours.He proposed this year on my birthday. I was happy to be engaged to a man who was so devoted and loyal to me. He was a chain smoker but after I insisted to quit he gave up on smoking.He restricted himself from overindulging in alcohol consumption.The problem started in the month of April. I feel our relaionship has hit rock bottom. The reason is we haven’t had much time for eachother in this month.We had awesome sex in the begining of this month but it has been more than 10 days that he hasn’t given me any time or spoken to me properly. Actually he works for an event management company. His work schedule is very hectic and he’s on tour 3-4 times in a month. Sometimes he has to work all through the night which makes him very grumpy and moody. He used to stay in touch with me through text messages and calls whole day. I knew his whereabouts and he kept me informed. I had a fight with him last week that he isn’t spending any time with me to which he replied that it’s all because of the crazy work schedule.He told me he is under lot of pressure. I feel his income is good enough to support us both but he feels it’s not much. He got a raise in the month of April. I thought this will solve all his financial worries but he says now his responsibilities have been doubled at work so he hasn’t been able to give me time. He told me he is planning to buy a 3 bedroom house for us and future kids.His current home is too small. He has been searching for it since long and that is also keeping him busy. He said he was going to show me the house by the end of the month and take a week off from work to take me on a romantic vacation in June.I get too worried about him. I want to support him. Infact I even offered to contribute financially for the new home to take some burden off him but he refused saying that as a man he should be able to provide for his wife and kids.He has become so engrossed in his work. He hardly calls or messages me.There hasn’t been much communication. Even if he calls it’s just to tell me that he’ll be crashing in his office since he’s very tired and he has to travel again in few hours.Sometimes there is no contact whole day which makes me so damn insecure.I feel we are drifting apart. He used to pay so much attention before and now even after telling him my worries he isn’t making much efforts to improve the communication.I had an argument with him yesterday. He got frustrated and told me that he expects me to understand. I hung up the call on his face saying he isn’t the same person anymore. I expected him to call me back like he always does and resolve the issue but he has been so cold with me and hasn’t even sent a single text since yesterday. I want to believe it’s just a difficult phase. He did tell me it’s a temporary situation and we are relocating so he’ll find a job with normal schedule so that our relationship won’t suffer. I want to stay positive but his aloofness lately has made me insecure. I feel that he doesn’t love me anymore.May be he’s really busy or may be he’s using work as an excuse to get away from me. I was always there to reassure him of his position in my life everytime he got insecure or jealous. But now when I need assurance from him he has become cold and distant only to make me more frustrated. I can’t put up with his silent treatment.I hope everything works out between us because I love him too much and he means the world to me.

  16. Hi Julia

    Basking in the lime light of the beginning stages of a relationship is intoxicating and
    you do not want that incredible feeling to end, but all god things come to an end and
    this happens to be one of them whether we like it or not.

    The idea is to continue growing in the relationship which takes on a new meaning
    consisting of more stability, reassurance and peace of mind in knowing that you
    are both moving forward toward bigger and better things which await you and are
    equally rewarding only different to how things were when you first began your journey
    of getting to know each other and falling in love. Which can be all consuming.

    These insecurities you are experiencing need to be harnessed otherwise they will
    interfere with the progress which is taking place and you do not want to be exhibiting
    them or voicing them since he has not given you legitimate reasons other than working
    toward something for the future which involves the both of you.

    Learn to trust him even though he may be busy and unable to provide you with the time
    and attention which you crave at the moment as this will pass when he is in a position
    to offer you those things when he is able to get his work affairs in order as time permits.

    PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE and must never be underestimated when required otherwise
    you may be contributing toward the deterioration and down fall of your relationship which
    must be preserved by nurturing it as best you can regardless of the little hurdles which
    may present themselves along the “PATH OF LIFE”.

    Support your Man and always stand by him because “BEHIND EVERY SUCCESSFUL
    MAN there is a VERY SMART and even more SUCCESSFUL WOMAN”.!!!

    I wish you the best of luck Julia and always keep the faith and keep smiling. Taurus.

  17. Hi Susannah

    You are more than welcome sweetheart.!!!

    Sometimes things happen for the best even though it doesn’t feel like it at the time but
    in the long run when all this is behind you it will be nothing but a distant memory which
    has taught you something about yourself and has made you a stronger and wiser human
    being.

    You will be able to take that knowledge and place it to good use in your next relationship
    which awaits you and there will be even more “CHEMISTRY” the next time around when
    you find that “SPECIAL” Guy whom will love you for your beautiful self and reward you
    with kindness not pain.

    Whatever happened my dear Girl was “NOT YOUR FAULT” because this person was
    wrong for you and God does not want you to suffer this is why he is sending you this
    message when you are looking for answers.???

    Have faith and believe that the best is yet to come and it will be soooo much better the
    next time you meet the Man of your dreams.!!!

    I wish you all the best in your bright new future which awaits you. Love Karissa

  18. Angelina says:

    Hi Julia,

    Having my share of years of experience in love relationships, I can tell you that when men are serious about a committed relationship they prove it as your partner is doing right now. He is investing in your relationship the only way he knows how. You may ask how is that by ignoring me, not calling me,texting me??? He is trying to show his love for you by being a good provider. Women and men want the same things, however they go about it differently.
    Women want attention, they want constant reassurance that he is still interested by making the phone calls, sending text messages throughout the day. Because we multitask. Men don’t. They are singular in their approach to whatever they are doing at the moment. Your partner is trying to show you that he does love you and that this is his way of making sure that you and your future children are being provided for. He’s not
    counting on you to help him build his castle. He wants to do it himself because of his pride as a man. He is expecting you to understand that and be supportive towards his goals and not insecure.
    There are different phases to a relationship. He’s in the phase where he is sure of your love and wants to
    prove himself. You need to give him the time and space that he needs to accomplish this while still being supportive and encouraging towards him. That’s what he wants. He wants your continued love and acceptance and understanding that what he is doing is for you, the woman he loves.
    You can try and find things that interest you and give you some joy and also keeps you from focusing on the no phone calls or text messages.
    It’s hard to find a good man these days. I know they are out there and it appears you have hit the jack pot so hang on and try to see things his way for now. You have already had the talk so you know that he’s doing this for you and your future family.
    Good Luck

  19. Angelina says:

    Hi Julia,

    Having my share of years of experience in love relationships, I can tell you that when men are serious about a committed relationship they prove it as your partner is doing right now. He is investing in your relationship the only way he knows how. You may ask how is that by ignoring me, not calling me,texting me??? He is trying to show his love for you by being a good provider. Women and men want the same things, however they go about it differently.
    Women want attention, they want constant reassurance that he is still interested by making the phone calls, sending text messages throughout the day. Because we multitask. Men don’t. They are singular in their approach to whatever they are doing at the moment. Your partner is trying to show you that he does love you and that this is his way of making sure that you and your future children are being provided for. He’s not
    counting on you to help him build his castle. He wants to do it himself because of his pride as a man. He is expecting you to understand that and be supportive towards his goals and not insecure.
    There are different phases to a relationship. He’s in the phase where he is sure of your love and wants to
    prove himself. You need to give him the time and space that he needs to accomplish this while still being supportive and encouraging towards him. That’s what he wants. He wants your continued love and acceptance and understanding that what he is doing is for you, the woman he loves.
    You can try and find things that interest you and give you some joy and also keeps you from focusing on the no phone calls or text messages.
    It’s hard to find a good man these days. I know they are out there and it appears you have hit the jack pot so hang on and try to see things his way for now. You have already had the talk so you know that he’s doing this for you and your future family.
    Good Luck

  20. Angelina says:

    Hi Julia,

    Having my share of years of experience in love relationships, I can tell you that when men are serious about a committed relationship they prove it as your partner is doing right now. He is investing in your relationship the only way he knows how. You may ask how is that by ignoring me, not calling me,texting me??? He is trying to show his love for you by being a good provider. Women and men want the same things, however they go about it differently.
    Women want attention, they want constant reassurance that he is still interested by making the phone calls, sending text messages throughout the day. Because we multitask. Men don’t. They are singular in their approach to whatever they are doing at the moment. Your partner is trying to show you that he does love you and that this is his way of making sure that you and your future children are being provided for. He’s not
    counting on you to help him build his castle. He wants to do it himself because of his pride as a man. He is expecting you to understand that and be supportive towards his goals and not insecure.
    There are different phases to a relationship. He’s in the phase where he is sure of your love and wants to
    prove himself. You need to give him the time and space that he needs to accomplish this while still being supportive and encouraging towards him. That’s what he wants. He wants your continued love and acceptance and understanding that what he is doing is for you, the woman he loves.
    You can try and find things that interest you and give you some joy and also keeps you from focusing on the no phone calls or text messages.
    It’s hard to find a good man these days. I know they are out there and it appears you have hit the jack pot so hang on and try to see things his way for now. You have already had the talk so you know that he’s doing this for you and your future family.
    Good Luck

  21. loyallibra says:

    In need of some advice, I am a Libra Woman who met my Scorpio Man 10 years ago. It began like most magical, intense, and a connection like no other. At the time I was very indecisive and did not understand a scorp as I now do, I was a flirt and at the tome still in love with my ex who was an Aquarius. I hurt my scorp badly I didn’t cheat but told him that I still had feelings for the Aquarius. We stayed together but now realized the damage was done. 3 years later I became pregnant with our son and the day I gave birth he told me he cheated on me with a pisces woman, I was devastated but didn’t think it would turn into anything (wasn’t the first time he cheated) He left me 2 days after our son was born and moved in with her. 2 years later they had a daughter, did I mention during this time he was back and forth between both of us, he would break up with me and go to her, break up with her and come back to me and to be honest this has been our relationship for the last 7 years. We have since had another baby who is 2 years old. He says he loves me and I am the first woman he ever fell in love with and that he doesn’t love her(I know that’s not true) he says he wants to marry me. My question is should I move on? He just went back to her and frankly I am tired of this triangle, I have been faithful, and loyal to my Scorpio I know he loves me and will always be there when I need him, what I don’t know if he is in love with me. I would love to be with him and don’t mind waiting if I knew I was the one who truly has his heart. On another note I have met another Scorpio born 2 days after my scorp Nov. 11th and want to know if I should just cut my loses with my scorp cause he may never give me his heart again and start on a roller coaster ride? I learned my lesson that’s why I need to know what to do, Please Help!!!!

  22. ATaurusGirl says:

    So I met this Scorpio man 2 years ago, I asked him for his number (something I never do) and he gave it to me. We started texting and getting to know eachother and eventually I brought up what it is he was looking for. He said he was looking for a “friend” and right away I let him know I was not interested in being friends and I quit texting him. A couple days later he texted me and told me that he understand and I took that as this potentially turning into something more… I was right, but not in the way that I though.

    Ok now here is the plot twist, we started hanging out and eventually had sex. After a few times, he sends me this long message basically stating that he had a girlfriend. I left him alone for a while but I did eventually go back (silly me)

    For a few months it was just a sex thing and it was no big deal. So I started talking to someone else and in true Taurus nature I gave the Scorpio man none of my attention and after a while he would start hitting me up, he eventually told me his girlfriend and him broke up and that he could really use my company…around that time I had quit talking to the Aquarius.(didnt last long lol) so the scorp and I started seeing eachother again and I was thinking that since they broke up that it would finally be my time… I was wrong, they got back together and broke up again.

    Now here I am almost a year later madly in love with this Scorpio man, who is single but will not commit to me. He acts like he cares and feels strongly towards me but he says that he feels he cannot be with me because he has hurt me too much already.

    What does this mean? Scorpio men help.

    Xoxo Taurus gal

  23. I’m with Jeffrey, if a Water /dominant water person doesn’t feel SAFE with you, get the hell out!! lol
    you’re just another NOTCH in the bedpost.

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