I lost my Taurus man
December 7, 2006 by Jeffrey Kishner
I’m sorry. I wish I could say something to provide you solace.
You did not ask your search engine for advice — you simply shared your grief, hoping that google would offer some comfort-providing links, an URL whose content would fill this gaping void that was created the moment your Taurus man left you.
It hurts, yes, I know. But sometimes the web does not help at times like this. It is all too tempting to search for meaning in text, but we risk intellectualizing away our pain.
Your Taurus man might tell you, at a time like this, to just feel the ache in your body. Go into it. Deeply. Or derive comfort through pleasing sensations: walk barefoot on smooth rocks, take an aromatherapy bath, get some bodywork. Your Taurus man may have let you down, but you always have Mother Earth on whom you can depend. It is her consistency and breathless silence that will get you through this.
Comment below: How have you coped with losing a Taurus man?
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You folks are quite the crowd –
Leo – AS a Taurean – and you should always hear it from the horses mouth not the other side entirely…
It really depends on the Taurean upbringing – how old he is – where he is in his career – is he content and secure now – does lack anything he wants?????
There is not enough info on your guy for me to optimize your strategy…
Of course I will give you more info on me and you can play it by ear as to what you should do…
————
I have dated the Libra — They fascinate me to no end great dressers and fashionable..I like their attitudes for spontaneous activities…but they take for granted to often the diamonds they have in there backyard…
I personally would avoid a long term relationship with one that has had one too many bad relationships ….
I am an intellectual on several levels -
I am educated in many fields…
I don’t smoke – drink socially – not often
I ride a Harley and I have a 4×4 truck of which I am proud of
I also write free style poetry -
I speak 4 languages
My favorite Teacher is the Rambam
I draw my energy and moods from my surroundings
I don’t like to bother with folks that don’t have simple common sense
I love helping disadvantage people
I favor being around folks that respect themselves and me
——
I love the idea of a woman that motivates me to be more loose and spontaneous and every now and then do some crazy things..I think that’s cool…
If anything I believe I mold myself to the one I want to be around and balance out what ever is needed..
I am far from being clingy but would be very cautious for any relationship with a woman who uses that word like a religious quote…
I am more prone to consider this type of woman for a long term relationship:
She must:
Have good health
Athletic or close to it
Great eyes – Great smile
Girly and Tough when she needs to be
Confident
loving
Likes family – kids outings
Likes to read
When complaining about something also has a solution
Compationate
Love reading all your posts re: Taurus men! I’ve been through every scenario mentioned++ with my Bull for almost three years now. Just speaking about yesterday with him though…another ugly, all-day, ridiculous, abusive, emotionally/mentally/physically exhausting battle between us once again left me the ultimate loser. I’ll spare the details here and get to my question: My boy-friend is what I like to call a 4T…Sun Taurus, Ascendant Taurus, Moon Taurus, Venus Taurus!!!! I’m the one in our relationship who almost always attempts to restore harmony first during these conflicts, and I easily accept this. What hurts me time after time is having zero assurance whatsoever as to his response to my sincere and loving gestures…meaning his reactions range in extremes from relentless and hostile for days to forgiving and sweet in minutes?? I’d appreciate all helpful thoughts or positive insight into a better understanding of this VERY Taurean man and the best way to keep both of us in love and peace.
!
P.S. I am Sun Cancer, Ascendant Sagittarius, Moon Capricorn, and also Venus Taurus
junemoonchild – your in for a long doozy…my oldest son is a cancer…my sister is a cancer,, and the cancers that I have met are somewhat the same…
Study the 18 codes I listed above they may save you…maybe..
Cancer around me tend to be pretty cool funny and lots of fun..its only when they want to get the last word in wrong or right ..at all cost…that creates alot of friction…remember most Taureans can change their moods real quick because they draw their energy from there surroundings and you will be on the end of the horns if your not careful..
Whatever you do dont get into a yelling frenzy…
Most cancers (women) from my experience that is,, are pretty ruthless at jumping the gun because they always feel there right (like the Taurus, lol), and sometimes there are ..lol and a good majority of the time…the cancer will play the simpathy crying card…nothing personal…
If you dont respect each other on what ever issues…then its going to be a doozy….
Lay down the rules of engagement – set the honey does and honey don’ts….
Good luck….
lyar18,
Really I like how it sounds and want to set the “honey (pleaseeee)does and honey(pleaseeee) don’ts”, but with my bull I’m pretty sure he will just strike out all the rules you tried to set. As far as I know, you will not tell Taurus what he should/should not, can/can not…. because they don’t live by your rule! (even you add the longest pleaseeeeee) But waaaait a min! Oh yeah I forgot…. lyar18, you are Taurus! yep, the ‘honey does and honey don’t’ sounds similar now because it is what Taurus do to us!!! lol- you typical Taurus! hehe.
Really dating Taurus is fun and a whole new experience for me. It opens up my world to a new perspective. Otherwise I would still feeling bad being accused for being self centered and turn back to my own identity pretending to be nice to please others. Since I met my T, he even wants and encourage me to be me and be meaner to bull**** people. But at the end Aries is Aries, we cant be Taurus, I can only learn from him to be more beautifully me…
Thank you Taurus!
lyar18…
Thank you for your response. I printed the “18 codes” list and I will keep all of your good advice in mind. You are absolutely right about Cancer quickly becoming too sensitive and defensive…and so Taurus and I do get into many of these intense yelling matches! The hope (and the long doozy) remains in the fact that neither one of us gives up OR let’s go very easily!
I don’t understand my Taurean ex. I caught him cheating, and he dumped me there and then! He told me that ‘he loved me, but wasn’t in love with me’, he’d fantasied that I was someone else the last few times we made love.
I had no idea that this was going-on. I didn’t see any signs, no change in his schedule, always told me he loved me and we had sex everyday.
I tried to re-negotiate our relationship, but he wouldn’t consider it. It was like a light switch going off, he just wants ‘to be friends’ now, but I haven’t heard from him for a few weeks.
I haven’t contacted him, as I still love him. Can I get this guy back, or has he really switched off from me?
Dannymates,
Please move on. From what I know, if Taurus wants to cheat it’s hard to catch them. They are very careful and make sure they don’t make mistake. So I think your ex must have been cheating on you for quite a while but just didn’t bother to break up with you so he can enjoy both until one of the girls caught him. Why bother re-negotiating? After a guy treat you like that, if there is negotiating or getting back at all, it must be from him not you.
I have been involved with two Taurus men in the past.Both men in their 40’s and both had similar track records with women. They dated a ton of ladies, married three times and both now divorced. One Taurus had an affair with his friends wife now they are divorced. The Taurus men are so manly but gentle it’s hard to explain. I fell head over heels for them. Although they were both great guys the Taurus men keep searching for what doesn’t exsist. Taurus men aren’t keepers in my book. I’m still friends with one have been for years even though he broke it off he still calls to see if I want him back, LOL no way! I got off that roll-a-coaster.
LibraLovesBalance..sorry to hear that it didnt work out…
I actually love everything about a libra woman, but she was too young and still trying to figure out the world.
I have to disagrree about not being a keeper, all Taurean men are not the same. My advise to folks with that opinion, should take the time to find out more about their upbringing and what they have experienced in their life. Just because they are 40 plus doesn’t mean they are seasoned.
I am both Taurean and INTJ — traditionally and commited to family and humanity as a whole..love affairs bore me and scare me. My first experience with a libra woman ended in disappointment as she was the one that cheated. Yet I am still fasinated with her even when she calls me to try to get back together, as you say – I got off that roll-a-coaster.
I am curious as to what you may mean when you say “Taurus men keep searching for what doesn’t exsist”??????
What may that be???
replying: layr18 I do agree up bringing has a great deal to do with it but both guys had a wonder family life. I spoke often to one of the guys mother. She was a wonderful lady and she mentioned her son has never found what makes him happy. The reason I say they keep searching is only by my experience alone. Both men were awesome when it came to treating a lady and making me feel safe. It seems they chased it and when they got it they tossed it away. The worst part after all this time both have tried to come back into my life. I am a Libra and once you hurt me, I forgive but the spark is gone and I don’t get it back.
Thank you for the reply LibraLovesBalance…
Is it safe to assume that because the mother of the Taurean mentioned that the son never found what makes him happy and he tossed your relationship away by chetaing…is the reason why you feel they are looking for something that does not exist?
If so I am still bewildered as to what it may be that they are looking for that does not exist?
Is it possible that maybe the attraction between both of you was more of a lust then love derived for the love of romance?
I have found that women friends that I have met are somewhat attracted to the idea of what I am and not who I am. The romance is never an issue, what I have found is that when it comes to an deep intellectual conversations, our compatability goes out the door.
So I am left to wonder if your statement has some validity?
“Taurus men keep searching for what doesn’t exsist”
Where a woman can be both Romantic and intellectually attractive for a Taurean Man?
lyar18 replied: If so I am still bewildered as to what it may be that they are looking for that does not exist?
Is it possible that maybe the attraction between both of you was more of a lust then love derived for the love of romance?
The reason I say this is because he broke up a marriage for this lady.Someone told me it was because he became jobless and had nothing her father gave him a job. I guess he never smiles or laughs like he used to but I wouldn’t know we live miles away. Maybe a man that has been married three times and still can’t be happy leads me to believe he’s looking for something that doesn’t exsist.
ALL
I AMA TAURIAN, I JUST BROKE IT OFF WITH A LIBRA , WE’VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 2 YEARS . WE JUST COULDN’T UNDERSTAND EACHOTHER , IM VERY PRACTICAL SOMETIMES LIBRAS CAN BE SO AIRY!!! NOT TRULY BEING GROUNDED OR PATIENT ENOUGH TO NATURALLY LET THE RELATIONSHIP EVOLVE . HE ASKED ME NOT TO LET HIM GO . I WAS THE FIRST GIRL HE WAS WITH FOR A LONG TIME WITHOUT NO ARGUEMENTS , 2 YEAR 2 ARGUEMENTS . I TRIED TO GIVE HIM ALL I COULD , BUT THE CONVERSATIONS SOMETIMES WERE OFF, WHICH EFFECTED OUR LOVE LIFE . I PULLED AWAY . AND HE CALLED AND CALLED , AND NOW HE GETS THE POINT , I WARNED HIM , THAT IT WAS TIME TO STEP UP. IM ATTRACTED TO STABILITY.
WE WOULDVE BEEN A GREAT COUPLE , BEING BOTH RULED BY VENUS , I JUST FELT IT WAS ONE SIDED . SO I DISAGREE. WHAT I WANT IS TANGIBLE , I BIG ON COMPROMISE , AS A BULL IM NOT IDEALISTIC . I JUST THINK LIBRAS / BULLS ARE NOT COMPATIBLE , IVE DATED 4 LIBRAS AND DUMPED THEM ALL.THEY’RE TO FICKLE /INDECISIVE. THEY’RE MOTTO IS THE GRASS IS ALWAYS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE . MY MOTTO IS TOWARDS LIBRAS . ”UNTIL U STAND THERE LONG ENOUGH TO WHICH IT DEVELOPES A BROWN PATCH, THEN U WANNA COME BACK ”
I fully agree on the fickle side of Libra. The Libra women are uaually very attractive and good company, but that’s about all. They see themselves as very practical and efficient, which they are *NOT*. They can make a stern decision one evening; by morning it’s changed to all different spheres.
I know a lot of them, still like some, but I need a constant relationship, not someone who says “oh, I forgot our date ‘cos I met this Umberto from Rome, he gave me roses” kind of stuff. I’m forever doomed to be with Virgo girls anyway.
And to the Cancer gals, I was a bit wild at the ripe age of 16…at a houseparty the doorbell rang. Someone answered the door and hurried to get me: “Chris, it’s THAT girl!” Two years older, an “old lady”, came to me and said softly: “Get your coat and off we go. I’m taking you away”. Then she gently led me by my virtual horns and nose-ring and I followed in good order to her home. She made some tea and wanted to chat but I was too tired and drunk, so eventually I fell asleep on her lap. So, Cancer, catch the bull by his horns. If he’s not in a gloomy mood, he’ll come after you. Do it discreetly, like in a softlee, softlee, catchee monkee mode. But DON’T push him into anything. He will dig his hooves into the ground and not move anywhere.
BTW, we still remain friends. We had good bed therapy on and off for years.
PART 1:
Dating a Taurus guy going on two months now. He treats me like a princess. From the moment we met it was intensity to the 100th power on his part. He said "u will be mine." The ambition was attractive. Me being Capricorn who's been done wrong too many times to count, have taken the attitude of the patient observer. He wanted to commit and after about two weeks of fighting it, I gave in. In my mind, I just find myself being as realistic as possible and putting my best efforts in to really getting to know him, and see if this guy is the real deal. So far, so good. He showers me with words, but in my mind, to me they are just that: words. "you are my princess" "i want to give you nothing but the best" taking me to the best locations for dinner, showering me with compliments, how i drive him crazy…etc. It's flattering, almost melts my little heart away.
But…sometimes it's like he flips a switch. He'll say things he's not happy with about me. Sometimes I question whether he's happy at all. We've had a bumpy ride, I am committed, persistent, I will not give up on someone once i've decided to settle, but if I do, it's because there was just no possible remedy. One of our issues was his inability to trust my judgment. What I find is that sometimes he is a walking contradiction. He has these ideals and hopes of how he wants things to be, and the sort of friendships he wants to have, and the standards he has…and as I keep looking at the picture the way that it is, the way that he is, i'm perplexed.
One of the things he said was that sometimes it's disappointing for him to think that if it wasn't for him insisting, I would have never given him a shot. To which I replied, "you're damn right i wouldn't have, but i'm glad you did." I try to reassure him not only through my words but also through my actions that i'm here for him, and i'm here to stay. He calls me everyday, and not just once…it's intense. Always wonders where i am, what i'm doing, how i'm doing, tells me he misses me, he loves me, etc. The paranoid (due to the sleezebags in the past) in me, questions if he's doing this because he has something to hide, as many cheaters will become overly possessive when they are going about their cheating…but it just doesn't go with his character.
He believes that a man should only have special feelings for one woman, so he's said. That even a friendship with a woman shouldn't really exist as there is a closeness that comes with that, and he wants to save that for his "first lady." (that's what he calls me by the way, and he ain't afraid to tell it to the whole wide world) Thank goodness for the incredible amount of patience I have because sometimes he just gets so frustrating to deal with that I feel like I want to pull my hair right out.
More recently and this is the reason i'm on this page today, a friend (girl) he often studies with has recently tried to get smart with me, i suspect she's interested in him. She asked me for advice because "she's interested in a guy who has a girlfriend, but she thinks he may like her" I advised her to back off because i'm sure she wouldn't appreciate being in the girlfriend's shoes. Personally, i think this story was all bull and she was talking about how she likes him. She's been over the top nice considering she just met me, and at first i thought it was genuine, now i question it. She talks about how my T-man gets along great w/ her brother. How he is the ONE guy she'd introduce to her friends. How her mother just loves him. She invited him and myself out to party, he mentioned it and i said "NO…i would much rather have alone time with him." He took this opportunity to take me to a really and i mean REALLY nice place and really go ALL out in terms of treatment. He tells me he loves it that I let him take good care of me…"it makes him feel really good."
Part 2:
Back to "bacteria," (my nickname for her) more recently, she sent me a message requesting my "permission" to take him as her date to a wedding thanksgiving weekend. My jaw dropped. Has she lost her f'in mind? She texts him non-stop. I called him out on all of it the minute i got her message. Here is his fix: for me not to respond. best case scenario, she drops it. Worst case scenario, she invites him, he'll say no, and let her know that he is questioning her intentions and thinks a lil distance is best.
Imagine my shock, when here, the man who doesn't believe in girls as friends is allowing text message madness, is being invited out to party, etc. All these standards he's shared with me, of how he thinks I should behave, or what he expects in a partner, just doesn't go with the way HE acts. His own judgment isn't really matching up to what he expects from me or from his expectations period. The paranoid me is fearing i'm being set up or being taken advantage of. And i really loathe that feeling. But i'm incredibly patient and i'm sitting this out and observing, trying to be very wise with what I say and do.
I came on this site to see if Taurus men are liars or cheaters. I guess it's silly because it really doesn't matter what your zodiac sign is, temptation followed by action doesn't really discriminate. But i just don't know what to think. this chic is just as intense as he is. I'm trying my hardest to really trust and follow his lead in terms of dealing with the situation. However, i did tell him, i didn't want something of this sort happening again so he needs to realign his boundaries.
Get this: he talks about marrying me, constantly. I don't even know what to make of all that, it's a lot to swallow in one gulp. He wants me to meet his family over the holidays, spend it away from home with them. I love security and stability and my best relationships have been like wine, gotten better over time, and i mean A LOT of time. I believe there are certain things you won't learn about people unless u really sit and allow time to show you their traits, if what they say really matches up with what they do. My T-man is just plain 'ol impatient. I have to constantly remind him to live a lil and smell the flowers from time to time. There are things about him here and there that I question and I want to see what they develop into over time. Hopefully he sticks around, if not oh well.
I guess i may be thinking too much about this possibility of betrayal, but it really sucks because once u've been betrayed it's so difficult to forget it. It'd be nice to hear from the T-experts who posted on here…i'd appreciate ur two cents. i'd really like for this to work out…but i'm not aiming to be played the fool either… what do u guys think?