All a Virgo man has to do is relentlessly criticize you and pick at your faults until you break down into tears. When you ask if he no longer wants to be with you, he will say, “Of course I do. You just need to x, y and z, and everything will be fine.” But when x, y and z are insurmountable tasks — when he is asking you to wipe yourself clean of all inadequacies — you realize you have been set up.
Or, he will say he’s not good enough for you. He tries to improve himself for your benefit, but he always comes up short. “You’re probably better off with someone else, someone who measures up.” You insist that he’s fine just the way he is, that you love him. “But there must be something wrong with you, if you can love such a loser. Really, I don’t deserve you.”
Comment below: How has a Virgo man broken it off with you?
About Jeffrey Kishner
@ NovLady…by the way…LOVE the new avatar!!!
@Ms.Teeq1974
Thanks! Lol.
When it comes to the Virgo energy, I feel there is a bit of a ‘nitpicking’ feel to it. When stressed or uncertain, I think that a Virgo may take one fault or slight (imagined or unimagined) and meticulously scrutinize it. Laboriously so, even. Its a nervous energy in need of a healthier, productive channel. Its why some Virgos are great workers (with their hands), its rumored. Definitely an obsessive sign linked to perfectionism.
@ LadyNov…I think you are absolutely right. This is one of the reasons why my friend’s hubby corners me to talk. He takes everything very personal. The thing that baffles me about this Virgo energy is that she can tell him something and he won’t take it at face value until he confirms it with me. But the way he does it…it’s like he has to be TALKED out of his mindset when feeling slighted. He will ask me a question, I’ll answer it. He’ll respond to what I said as if he can see the logic in it. Not 2 damn minutes later, somehow…emotionally, he back on his original thought pattern of negativity….STILL asking the same FLIPPIN FRACKIN QUESTION. ARRRGGG!!! I just sit there patiently…and answer it again, maybe taking a different approach, telling a story, or IDK…just trying to explain it a different way.
It’s not until I give him the one eyebrow up and head cocked to the side look…in other words, “Either you get it or you don’t. I’m done. I have nothing more to add.” THEN…he’ll go…yea…I get it.
LMAO!!! She calls me quite frequently stressed out about her convos with him. It’s great to be able to agree with her, but be detached enough to talk her off of the ledge..get her to see his finer qualities or focus on those rather.
But in my experience with Coach…shit…I can see how women have such a hard time dealing with Virgo men. It’s like you get the best and worse in the same damn person.
They are good with their hands. I know Coach has alot of hands on skills/talents and while I haven’t seen or heard of my friend’s hubby doing much, I do know that his job is extremely hands on…he’s a laborer. Apparently, he must be good at it from what I can gather….just my intuition and him looking at some things around my house that are similar to what he puts together in his job. He made a comment about it and I peeped how he pays attention to detail. Coach is the same damn way…very detail oriented.
But dammit, those men are stubborn as hell, emotional, needy while not wanting to show it, and want things to go their way EVERY SINGLE TIME…which is not feasible. But in observing men with this sun sign…they kinda pout or become…what’s the word? Petulant. Yes, extremely petulant. Like you stepped on their new shoes.
I’ve never said this on this blog, but Coach is kinda whiney too. lol ha ha ha He really is. Which for me is not a problem, but I know some women HATE whiney men.
@Ms.Teeq1974
What confounds me is how Virgo is the MUTABLE sign of earth. Where is the flexibility? Perhaps, in the myriad of ways they could see things? The Mercurial energy? Mental dexterity rooted in the earth. Very curious. I read somewhere recently that Virgo is a sign of duality, too.
@NovLady….I believe they r easy to influence in areas where they want to seem impressive and notice that others are…mimicing speech patterns, gestures, styles…etc. Yes they r dual in that the men that Ive seen equally make both a good and horrible mates. They strive or try to facilitate perfection, yet dont xare to be perfect themselves. Thats where they almost demand recognition for doing the things they should, but expect others to exceed the expectations. I believe thats why Virgos are extremely discriminating, but themselves cannot or rather do not have the stamina to consistently excel in relationships, hence the habit of pushing their mates to consistently be better. What is perplexibg to me is how 2 Virgos can seem to have a great relationship. Lol
I think in a relationship, both partners must either work it out or compensate not matter what the sign is. But it’s a good thing you posted this. At least now I have an idea how Virgo men would brake it off.
To the bull stops here:
dam I do find comfort in pain
once I said I wanna see you hurt so I can come and comfort you
yes I have a twisted mind it’s just because I delt with pain before and I don’t wanna see anyone gettin hurt I just wanna be loved is that too much to ask for?
Ladys I just wanna be loved I’m a Virgo who doesn’t play silly games on the real tho
You people make me laugh
What confounds me is how Virgo is the MUTABLE sign of earth. Where is the flexibility?
think the flexibility comes in dependent on other places in their chart..like moon for instance. With aqua moon I see more flexibility with virgo bf than with other virgos. He isnt as judgemental, acceptance of people faults, live and let live attitude. He is over 50 and maybe age mellows them?
‘men are stubborn as hell, emotional, needy while not wanting to show it, and want things to go their way EVERY SINGLE TIME…which is not feasible.’
-absolutely. and they get depressed. As a Cap I am able to balance out my virgo..I dont know how, I just do. He can be in a crap mood and i can make him feel better just by standing by him and supporting him until he works thru it. I dont offer advice on how to fix things for him, I just listen.
His friends have told him since we’ve been together, he seems so much happier. and it has nothing to do with sex making him happier,lol, cause right now he are LDR.
@Tony-Yan:
“once I said I wanna see you hurt so I can come and comfort you
yes I have a twisted mind it’s just because I delt with pain before and I don’t wanna see anyone gettin hurt I just wanna be loved is that too much to ask for?”
I think the issue with Virgos is that your need to feel needed can often thwart your partner’s growth…because them becoming independent and no longer in need of your comfort can often make you guys feel useless and thus disposable…but that is not necessarily the care…just because someone isnt going through pain, doesnt mean that there is no other way in which you can comfort your mate…people need comfort and understanding just as much in less painful times (like support in work, or goals, etc) then only in times of pain (sickness, death, etc.)…many Virgos often assume that if the person isnt going through pain, that they wont be needed …the selfishness aspects comes into play because does that mean…that you will push pain onto your mate so that they can need you just so you can keep them around…this is where I have a problem with the dynamic…I have seen many a Virgo stir up drama in their mates’ life just to feed their need to feel needed and I find that tendency to be selfish..not all Virgos of course, but all the ones I have known both as friends, family and as mates
well said PQ. I find virgo’s nosy as well.LOL..getting into others business to rry and fix it when they should stay out..
@Capbaby:
” I find virgo’s nosy as well.LOL..getting into others business to rry and fix it when they should stay out”
Yes, they are the biggest meddlers of the zodiac….and usually end up making more of a mess of the other person’s problems and then they blame everyone else but themselves….funny thing is that Virgos are SUPER nosy yet secretive about themselves…lol…smh
My Virgo broke up with me for insisting he was not in love……after three weeks of dating. I tried to talk some common sense into him and you can never tell a virgo anything. He came back several times, and we’d be fine for two to three weeks and he would start a fight. He knows how to make me mad and insecure, and he thrived ont hat. He would do things like relentlessly hit on other women, hit on my friends, and pretty much pick apart every little thing i’ve ever done for him. He would insist that I was bragging about all the help I gave to him when he was having problems, however I only brought up how I felt he was being ungreatful. This pattern continues with him; he insists he wants to get married and have kids (he’s pushing 40,) yet the year and a half of our bitter relationship is the longest he’s ever had. I just don’t get it!
I’d keep the break up. If after some time has passed you both can reconnect, then go from there. But I wouldn’t go back right now. If he said he wasn’t in love..believe him. A man or woman knows when they are or aren’t.
Thats just it; we don’t speak for months and reconnect. We get close, and he goes away again. It seems as if he gets scared things are getting too good, because he finds something to fight about everytime. I don’t even know what we get mad at each other for most of the time. When I ask him about his prior relationships, he never tells the same story twice. The longest relationship he’s ever been in was less than a year. He believes he will feel love after a few weeks, and I personally don’t feel that is possible. THAT is puppy love; and his experiences in the love department are much more delayed than mine, so I just think he’s living his teenage years in his mid 30s.
hello, everyone, I’m not new to sasstrology, but I am new to posting on Virgo’s. I’m am going to be honest I am embarassed to say but this Virgo we haven’t been together since 2007 and I still like him. I mean I tried dating this Capricorn I really like and I changed my number so the Virgo couldn’t contact me anymore cause I was mad at him anyway, I mean I was like yeah, I am really going to try to move on with my life, well soon as things started going wrong with the Capricorn, guess what, I broke down and called the Virgo, who is not in the same state I am in, so we are just friends but I still like him. he informed me he tried calling me but of course my number was changed and I just told him, i was trying to move on with my life but I just can’t shake you. and he knows how much i like him but it seems like I’m the one who always ignitiate’s communitcation first by text and I told him I feel like I am bothering him and I should just get a life and he says it sounds like I am mad at him and I was like yeah because you never contact me first. so about two days later he text me and says I am happy we still communicate and I am thankful for you and you help me get by the last few months (oh yeah he is in the service). So does this text sound like a normal just friend text to ya’ll or does it sound like he still has feelings for me, because I am confused and I more confused because I guess texting him helps him get by because I don’t assist him in any other way. and I decided to ask him what does this text mean and honestly ya’ll he bagged away I haven’t heard from him since. and I’m tired of trying to figure him out. what do ya’ll think?
@Ms. Pisces
That’s a virgo for you. I’ve been trying to get over mine for a year and a half, and they have such an effect on your heart. Personally based on my similar virgo situation, I think it is possible the feelings are still there; but its a virgo you can never be for sure lol. I think they are truly terrified of loving and feelings. Just wade the waters carefully.
Virgo man & I broke up — or taking a break — I really don’t know because as usual, he’s ignoring me. I’m really sick of his method of communication especially when all he could do is apologize. Two weeks ago it was my birthday and he didn’t even get me a card. It was a birthday that ends in a zero, so not your average birthday. No celebrating just him crying how he disappointed me. Then the night ended in drama. I really never forgave him for that. Then 5 days after he messed up my birthday, he tweeted that he was at a birthday party. I didn’t even know whose. And all the secrets after 13 months regarding his friends and I never met one. He says him missing my birthday was MY FAULT. I’m just plain tired of him blaming me for everything. His ex didn’t work for 10 years. I work every day and take care of myself but he still says I’m not doing enough, I should have a better job. He later said because he has faith in my abilities but I took it as an insult. What’s it to him how much money I make? Two month ago he said he wanted to get a house for us, have babies, get married, then he backs out and says he’s scared because lately I’ve been pushing back hard, especially after my birthday. Then he said he wants to limit our relationship to dating because when he sleeps over at my house chores get in the way of our friendship, so I took it as he wants to stay at my house without having to help clean. I consider dating “a night out” then go home, no sleepovers. His version of dating is sleepover for 3-7 days. We use to live together then he moved 2 hours away. I told him that’s long distance, why didn’t you move closer if you wanted to stay together? Of course I got a lame excuse. He acts really tough but I know he’s at home crying as usual. He’s a very sweet guy when he wants to be but all of this blaming, then ignoring me, heavily criticism… I cannot take it anymore. I can’t take the constant dark cloud over every action I make that I should be proud of. Nothing is ever good enough for him! Things change for awhile but it’s back to square one. I’m going to stay away until he apologizes, which he never has done once. It’s always me being the bigger person. I guess I might as well kiss the relationship goodbye. I see I’m not the only one having these problems. Seems he needs to be taught a lesson and stop being such of a baby!!! I think I need someone a lot stronger than this guy or stay single, who knows?