How to win a Scorpio back after you have hurt him

Scorpio men do not take kindly to being hurt. Scorpios hold on to resentments as tightly as a sphincter holds on to water. A fixed water sign, he is stubborn when it comes to emotions. Scorpios don’t trust easily in the first place, because they are all too aware of how one can be wounded in intimate relationships.

Scorpio is ruled by Pluto, the planet that digs deep into experience, rooting out secrets and suppressed memories. Pluto is associated with manipulation and abuse of power. The Scorpio man is well-acquainted with the methods of torture used in the Underworld, and hence does not like to be on the receiving end of such barbaric techniques.

Even though the Scorpio man does not let go easily of his resentments, his zodiac sign is also the most transformative. Pluto rules the death-rebirth process. Scorpios hold tight, but they also periodically become devoured by the flames of regeneration.

As he rises from the ashes, your Scorpio man will have let go of his anger. However, there’s nothing you can do to initiate this process. Pluto works by his own mysterious schedule.

You cannot win back a Scorpio, but if you’re patient he might forgive you.

How long do you want to wait?

Comment below: Have you been reunited with a Scorpio after having hurt him?

About Jeffrey Kishner

Jeffrey Kishner is founder and publisher of Sasstrology. He is a licensed mental health counselor and has been doing astrological counseling since 2001. Jeffrey has been published in print magazines including The Mountain Astrologer and Dell Horoscope, and has written online for sites including AOL, and StarIQ. Jeffrey has also been heavily involved in the astrology blogger community. Read his personal blog at


  1. Thank you karissa15.. you are right.. Somehow maybe im still hoping that he will come back.. It slides in my what if he is just trying to test me or something.. there were no closure so i had hard times movin on.. I wanna win him back but i dont really know how or if its the right thing to do..

  2. Hi Cafter

    Listen to me honey. You sound like a wonderful, caring and loving Human Being
    and I don’t think this fool deserves you but it’s not for me to say and you clearly
    love him and want him back but it has to be his choice and the more you persist
    the more he will resist so the best thing to do with this particular stubborn sign
    is to just leave him be and when he comes to his senses and realises that you
    are keeping your distance he may very well decide that he wants you back and
    do something about it if he doesn’t want to lose you.

    Even though it must seem very hard to sit back and do nothing sometimes that
    is exactly what you must do in order to knock some sense into someone’s head
    that you are not at their beck and call and you actually have more important and
    valuable priorities which do not revolve around him because he does not deserve
    your emotional and mental energy since he is doing nothing to earn them.

    You don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone and that is what you need to impress
    upon him at this point in time so if he is serious about you he will take the necessary
    steps to contact you, come to you and pursue you. And since Absence makes a
    Heart Grow Fonder just let him miss you and learn to appreciate you and value you
    as much as you do him. How else is he supposed to learn unless you teach him
    what is expected of him since he can’t figure it out for himself.???

    Be smart and wise because you deserve so much more then what he has give you
    so far which leaves a lot to be desired. So change your tune and put him to the test
    if he wants the best. And if he is testing you just turn the tables and test him back.

    Cheers Lovely Girl and keep smiling. Taurus

  3. Karissa15,
    Thank you… Thank you.. That was the best advise ever.. I’ll do that.. I will try.. I just bought a new puppy so ill focus my attention to her from now… Mwaaaa ! Thank you

  4. Hi Kafter

    You are more than welcome Sweetheart and it sounds as though you are taking
    the right approach which should serve well one way or another. So enjoy your
    little Puppy whom deserves all your love and care and she will return it tenfold
    since a dog is a humans best friend, they love you unconditionally and give you
    sooo much companionship and pleasure in life.!!!

    I wish you all the best life has to offer, keep believing in your self because you
    are the best and deserve the best so keep smiling and keep in touch.!!!


  5. HI, Me and my scorpio bf split up in sept 12, since then ive been really ill with cancer ,he new this but we were still sending eachother horrible texts, well mainly me cause iwas hurt……3 weeks ago he got back in contact with me and wants to be friends……ive asked him to come back but he keeps saying i couldnt handle him working away….we have had a laugh on the phone, but he backs away if i say anthing nice or that i miss him…..i really want him back , he came to see me and i invuted around for a drink and meal which he said yes …..

  6. we have split up a few times before and got back together, normally when we start talking we get back together…..he is normally the one to start talking then its sort of me that has to beg him to see sense ….

  7. sadexbabymama says:

    Im 3 months pregnant with twins, that we planned to conceive. We have been on a rollercoaster relationship for 3 years off and on. He’s 36 and I’m 29. We recently broke up, not over cheating,) and he hates me! He won’t answer the phone , told me to have a nice life, me and my babies ( twins) should I get out now , have a abortion, and move on? Or should I h keep the babies and hope he will be involved when they are born? He so selfish I really think he could walk away and never look back! Pleas help

  8. sadexbabymama says:

    By the way, he is a Scorpio and I’m a cancer

  9. Hi Sadex Babymama

    You have been blessed with twins no less and I can not believe you are even
    considering the notion of an abortion which should definitely be out of the
    question regardless of whether this fool is there or not because you will do
    very well with or without him so just go ahead and have your little babies.

    If he doesn’t return prior to the birth I am very certain he will be there once they
    arrive and he will not be able to resist staying away from his flesh and blood
    whom will be two wonderful little bundles of joy and will bring a lot of happiness
    pleasure and joy into both of your lives.

    Take care and let me know how you and the babies are getting on.? Taurus

  10. i was involved with a scorpio man for 8mnths, we were inseperable, we loved each others company, we shared very intimate moments together. he told me he loves me nd he has neva felt this way before nd that its so easy to talk to me. anyway, i had a jealousy attack,went crazy as he had his arm around anotha woman…..if i search my heart i know it was done unintensionally, but the damage is done, he left nd he has been gone 3weeks now, i have sent numerous text apologising nd telling him that we are good together, but no reply…… how can a scorpio man just switch off like that? he is making me feel like i never excisted…….. he always told me he will never hurt me as i came from a very abusive marriage,nd my husband cheated…….i trusted him, how can he do this??????

  11. My Scorpio ex used to test me like that. It’s a whole other ball game if you so much as talk to another guy. Scorpios are the biggest control freaks. I did just what you did too. I had fight with him but I caved even though he was wrong. I sent numerous text message left sorry voice messages an nothing. I was cut off like I never was anything to him. It’s been Fi e months and I realize now I would never go back to that type of abuse. Move on an let him come to you.

  12. I lost my temper with my Scorpio man. He played push me pull you, come and go too many times. I couldn’t take it anymore. I confronted him and I have been cut off with out so much as an explation. It’s ben seven months no response to any text, emails or phone calls.

    I have been hurt by people before but never cut them off like they meant nothing to me. This is a form of abuse and he is 38 yeas old.

    I have closed the door and even if he contacts me in the future, I’m done.

  13. I dated a scorpio for about 5 years. I broke up with my him about a year ago due to constant bickering (it wasn’t healthy). He didn’t want things to end & was extremely heart broken. Now I want him back & he wants nothing to do with me even though he has admitted that he misses me & doesn’t know what the future holds. I’m just trying to be patient in hopes that he changes his mind & comes back. I miss him terribly :(

  14. Im just happy this time around Im not all in my feelings about the separation like I used to be. I had to get on meds to block my emotions but it working!!! Im just tired of wasting my life and energy on a Scorpio man who insist on playing mind games.. He is 37 and Im 34.. we both too old for this. I have never played games other than playing stupid and gullible to see if he would try to take advantage of me.. and he didn’t past my test!! He played me like a straight fool.. but Momma didn’t raise one of those.. Jokes on you buddy!!

  15. My Aquarius Scorpio moon exboyfriend blocked me on Facebook, WhatsApp, pity we work for same company.

    We made once in October 2011 after that i chased him like almost three years, only to find out that there was another Virgo woman in the same company, at first i thought they were only friends.

    My Libra Sun and Pisces moon didnt take that well, I became suspicious, jealous, I lost faith and i couldnt trust him anymore, when he told me we must talk. I just thought maybe he wants to use me like before and disappear.

    Then people told him that i slept with this guy at work, i didnt,but almost `Yes The guy is cute but i could stop thinking of my scorpio man. Now he hates me, i can see the way that he looks at me and its like he is trying to spite me with this woman spiteful.

    There i was a point when i thought i’ll get over this especially because he started it but i just cant take it anymore.

    Is Scorpio ‘s jealousy go with love or they just like that with every women they sleep with. Do i text him to forgive me but he didnt even bother to confront me i can only see his actions…. Or do i have to distance myself as well…

  16. Hello.. Av dated my scorp 2years now. Am 4months pregnant for him bt ta been amonth since he left me wth no reason. He sent me a text that i shd leave him,he asked me to abort bt i have refused. He said if i dont have an abortion h then i’ll take care of my pregnancy myself. Am confused coz its my 1st baby n i love it already. W’d he be playing on my mind?

  17. Don’t bother because unless this is a highly evolved soul, it will repeat the sting. Trust me. Pointless. Good luck with that!

    “what is it in itself, and by itself”

    Better think long and hard about that.

  18. I was with my scorpio boyfriend for 6 months and last week he broke up with me for the second time. Previously before him, I have had difficult relationships involving abuse and cheating, which has affected my trust in men altogether. The reason for our breakup is that he feels like I dont trust him when he has done nothing wrong and I am constantly questioning him which leads us into arguments that bring him down.

    Although the bickering and trust issues have improved over the last couple of months, he feels that he cant try anymore and has tried again once before. Although he has said its over, he did finally admit that he loves me and that he misses me. After speaking with my family over the phone, he has decided to have a 6 day no contact period where he can think things through and finalise the decision.

    I have made it clear to him that friendship cannot be an opinion but I love him and want us to try again to make things work. Friday evening is the day hel contact me (2 nights time) to give me his final decision. These last few days have been the hardest ever- I cant seem to move on and accept that fact that although he struggled to say it, he told me it was over. Its killing me inside to the extent that I am having panic attacks and insomnia each night.

    What do I do? Is there any way to change his mind or make him see that wed be happier together and this is this biggest mistake over nothing horrible like cheating. I know what my issues are and I am making steps to solve them so that I can trust in someone as faithful as he is. I really want him in my life again, any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am a Taurus.

  19. Hey Suri. With scorpios it’s always complicated. Never suspect scorpio’s loyalty! I’m male mars in scorpio 8th house with pluto in 7th house and I have the same problem with my mars capy scorpio girl. Never play a jalousy game with a scorp. It always turns bad. Even if he is madly into you he will refuse to contact you and torture himself thereby. Scorpios ara masochists, trust you me. Be patient if you really care about him, don’t play games and don’t push him for his emotions are extremely deep and make him react violently if hurt. It may take him a long while, be prepared for it, but if he REALLY loves you 99.99% he’ll retun. Patience

  20. Hi im a taurus girl and my ex bf is a scorpio…we have been together for 3 years … he went to jail for 1 year and a half and i was the only one doing anyhting for him while he was in jail literally. he got out we were finei got preg. but miscarried. 2 months later we broke up becaue he cheated on me with this other girl she is a scorpio and while he was cheating on my i didnt know it but i knew something was wrong he told me he wasnt happy because i was a bitch to him which i was. he cried on the phone to me and told me i cant make him feel like shit and he loves me so much and i believe he loves me i mean he has my name tatted on his hand and we have been together so long he was really emotional with me i asked if i could make him happy again he said yes but 2 days later i seen a picture of him and her on her instagram i confronted him about it and aftter that he was gone. ! but for a while he would text me tell me he missed me but that stoped and we would just talk about whats going on in life. I really want him back i know he cheated but if i was doing the things i was supposed to be doing and treating him right he prolly wouldnt have left he has been gone for about 2 months now he hasnt talked to me since the beginning of this october and after that ive been sending text messages telling him how much i love him he wont say nothing back,. i told him “if you dont love me anymore tell me that or im going to cotinue to thing you love me.. he didnt say anything back and ive been chasing him What can i do to get him to miss me i really want him back thats the love of my life

  21. cancer/scorpio says:

    My husband and i have been together since 99 we have 3 children he’s cheated several times even before marriag . I always took him back i left him about three years ago . Then i met someone hes came home multiple times since tben the last time almost a year ago he now has someone. Should i give up on my marriage. I didn’t trust him but he’s changed now. He has in his head i left him for who i met but i didn’t.

  22. My ex is a Scorpio and so am I. I’ve known since I was 18years old, but reunited last year and started a relationship for 8 months. It’s been 6months since we broke up. He started dating a very young girl 2weeks after our break up. Honestly I cant even remember why we broke up. Anyways it has been an emotional rollercoaster since our break up. He has stalked me even after having a girl. He cheated on her with me and when I told her he filed and injunction for stalking. The injunction was dismissed because the judge saw the BS. We then reunited again in the beginning of September he showed up at my house without calling and found my key that I kept hidden under the mat. I woke up with him standing over me. I know it did creep me out a little. We made love and he left. We continued to keep communication for two weeks and then he disappeared for a week and a half. He appeared again in the beginning of October. He invited to his house where i saw that he kept a picture of his girlfriend, but felt that he needed to point out the fact that he got the same bed that I have. I know weird. Anyways that night we made love and he told me how much he loved me and couldn’t stop thinking about me even while being with his Taurus girlfriend. Anyways on oct 8th he told me that we could not contact each other anymore after I told him that I wanted a normal relationship and i was ready for one with someone else. That weekend I went on a date and saw him at my apartments that same night while I was still with my date when I confronted him and he denied that it was him. Again he told me that we couldn’t be around each other and I agreed. Two days later he calls me but i declined his calls. Did I mention that I don’t even have his phone number he would call me blocked. The next day he called from a new york area code at that moment i didn’t know it was him i picked up. He said that he had called me because he had moved and did not know when he was coming back from New. York. We got in an argument about him trying to get me pregnant and about him being at my house. I sent him an email about how i was done with the drama and craziness. This happened last week. However today i drove by his because i was heading to an appointment and it’s located in his neighborhood and guess who I see? Yes that lying ass Scorpio outside in his driveway talking to who was probably his girlfriend in her car. So the moral of my story is that us Scorpio play a lot of mind games. We will go as far as trying to impregnate just to keep the control. In his case he finds i fun playing with me because he knows that I’m still in love with him and after all these months have remained loyal to him. We are very vindictive especially two Scorpio against each other. It gets scary at how far we go. However i found in myself to forgive and move on completely because in the end that man will destroy me. He is a libra rising which explains his seductive ways. Venus in Scorpio and libra in mars. I’m the same except I’m Sagittarius rising. Deep down do I want him? Hell yeah everyday. He was that mirror and i fell in love with it. Is it logic? Hell no because I know I would always want to seek revenge.

  23. Hey Suri. I’m just wondering did you guys ever get back together?

  24. I am a cancer woman and I hurt my scorpio boyfriend a few months ago. However, with patience, he has finally forgiving me….he will never forget it but at least he has given me another chance to prove my loyalty. Being with a scorpio male takes lots of patience, however, it is worth every moment….

  25. Hi,

    I have met the most wonderful scorpio man 6 month ago. we became friends to start with and then after month we start kissing :) it went on for a month and then he gave me the message he would go back and give his x girlfriend another chance, and so he did. we ad no contact for almost a month but then we met on a street by accident. he told me he’d never forgot me and had missed me, so he finally broke up with now his ex and we started seriously dating . i got involve with his daughter, his friends, staff members and literally the whole world he told them about me. our feeling grew stronger and stronger, and he started missing me now even when he was working and at home alone. he invited me to his fiends party for the first time 2 weeks ago to day. he couldn’t even wait for me to show up at his house, he told me i make him feel so “alive” he can be himself 100% when he’s with me and i make him feel very comfortable. though he’s feeling he says irritated him cause now he was no longer in control :) with a smile.

    At that party his x x mother of his child were there, it was the first timer ever she should se him with another woman (they had been together for 17 years, broke up 3 years ago) i was told to respect her and kinda keep distance, so i did.

    i am a cancer and love dancing even with myself, and so i did, dancing all night having fun. he came to eventually and told and declaring his love for me, that he was ready to commit himself to me and my kids, schools, football, economy and everything – way i felt so happy.

    2 hours later he freaked out, he said i was dancing with the same guy to long and i didn’t come looking for him, so god he got really mad. we went home and i spend the night. in the morning i thought he’d forgot about this matter and it was a joke he got so angry, but NO WAY, i should just leave his house. I did and he left me in silent for a week till monday, where he kinda broke up with me, he said we should finish. he’s now in holiday and I’m home here left in a stage of chock, what the F… happened here??? he was very kind though i should just call him any time when i want my things delivered, he wishes me all the best in the future cause i really really deserve it he says, so he kind of went from being silent for a week to now wish me all the best!!! but god I’m confused, we had THE BEST TIMER EVER and never ever argued, he said i was the easier person to be with ever and not complicated at all and not looking for conflicts ( i have been in self development the last 18 month in bali, i i wish an authentic relation ship now)

    I had no idea a scorpio man was jealous, only just met him and this was our first party and in public together. He says this has nothing to do with jealous, cause he’s been told his entire life he is cold as ice and with out feeling?? i do not recall any of this cause he has been very authentic with me and always showed his feeling.

    its his birthday in a week the 15 th of november, should i write him a letter, but him a small present or what i should i do to win him back.

    hes in holiday for a week now with a friend, and i know for the fact he has just contacted a common girlfriend yesterday and asked if they have heard anything from me, cause he broke up with me (it was at her party btw)

    so now I’m left with all these question?

    why does he do that if he doesn’t care?
    why would he offer to bring my stuff himself if he doesn’t care?
    why would he want all the best for me cause i deserve it, if he didn’t care?

    i know he has strong feeling for me and I’m sure he got really surprised for his own feeling that night cause he finds it very hard to meet someone and fall in love – he even said i knew this would happen, and I’m just left blank and had no idea what this is all about, as i said i don’t know this man very well except we are having a GREAT AND FUN time together always.

    would a scorpio man give all this up now we have met, with this strong feelings and now kids involved?

    how do i deal with this the best way.

    as i say lim cancer and dying to write him a card for his birthday when he gets back form holiday and tell him that i think out love deserve a second chance, this is all based on lack of communication and i didn’t do ANYTHING wrong all i wanted to do was dance…he admit this part, he says he trust me so much and that was not the issue, the issue was i didn’t see it for my self. and then after i wrote him an email telling him what i found his action very unattractive but a the same time made it clear about my love for him..

    long story i could keep on going, the fact is i i was only dancing…

  26. With my former Scorpio partner it has been unrelenting vengeance and as we share a child together he has been driven to outdo me in parenting in winning her affection and respect and proving his superiority in her eyes. Until just recently he was a mad dog at every turn. Something clicked though and he seems to have calmed down to a slow simmer. thankfully

  27. Me and my scorpio have been going at it for months. I had the hardest time trusting him. I felt like he wasnt into me even tho he swore he was. Ive said some really mean things to him. He wud go awhike without talking to me. And wen we did we were always arguing. He moved away but we still wanted to make something work. But he is so difficult and im stubborn. I know my nittpicking is too much to handle. We have known eachother since we were 15. Never dated then. We hooked up at 23. Had a amazing connection. Talked about everything. I know my trust issues oushed him away. I want him back. I want to orove to him im in this all the way. But he claims he met someone and we could only be friends. What do i do. I really do love this man. Im a virgo and he is a scorp. Im obsessed.

  28. Tyrannosaurus says:

    Scorpios are the hardest figure out. Masters of deception, seduction and manipulation. We are chess masters on the psychological playing field. We have high levels of intuition and perception and intelligence (Yes I know, narcissism, now get used to it), just try lying to any of your scorpio friends, try your best, and see their faces as they smirk right back at you. Sometimes we are known to have that ultra sexy, seductive and mysterious gaze, it’s because sometimes i’m trying to look directly into your eyes, either i’m seducing you subconsciously or I’m looking at the way your pupils dilate when I ask you questions. We have this uncanny ability to discover the truth and we know exactly what you’re thinking. Another tactic we use is, we intentionally bite your bait that you have thrown out for us, which makes you happy thinking you got us already, but know this, we’re watching your reaction as we chew on your bait ;).

    We’re the nemesis class for every women of every zodiac sign out there. If you don’t believe me? just think of that Scorpio that you have fallen in love with and how you want him back soooo badly, like you want him now, RIGHT NOW!

    We usually put on like 50-500 layers of mask and defense before you actually find out the *truth*, yet when you actually do, you find yourself in a whole new maze level. We’re extremely good at that, we can reconstruct and deconstruct new mazes on the fly. Just think of it like the movie Inception, a dream within a dream within a dream within ah yes, yet another dream, well you get the idea.

    Yet if you get past all the defenses, and reached to the very depths of our hearts. Then get ready girl and brace yourself, for high level impact LOVE. We will love you like no other man in your life.

    Oh you, fairest among women.

    But sometimes when we truly love a girl, for example, due to various circumstances, we disable contact with her, because she has hurt us, and trust me it takes us days if not weeks or months or years to forgive (we never forget, not kidding on this one XD, but we do forgive… to a certain extent, of say maybe 95%… I think… XD). And years has past, and she has found a new love by now, but when she see that Scorpio again who has before tarnished her shiny armor, as if she has heard the hoofs of her prince charming. In that very very… instance, it reignites her passion, her memories and her feelings for that Scorpio. Yet when we found out that her new love is a really really good and nice guy who treats her extremely well, even when she re-confesses her feelings to that Scorpio. That Scorpio, because of out of great intense love for her, he will hide all his feelings and put on a very steel and cold mask and instead of saying “I LOVE YOU” (We really mean these words to the uttermost) to the one we love the most, we crush her heart in its entirety and manipulate her back into the arms of her current love. And she will never ever know the truth about it, because we’re extremely good at keeping secrets. But you must know, in order for us to do this, we have to crush our own hearts first. Thereby stinging ourselves. We never want to see the one we love cry… You have no idea how much it breaks our hearts if that happens. It is like we’re aren’t affected by anything of this world, career, business, money, status, whatever you name it. But when it comes to you my dear, we always want you to be happy, we want to see that smile on your face, that true happy smile. Because no amount of money can ever buy such a beautiful smile like your’s…

    When we meet a girl whom we truly love, like eagles, we desire to mate for life, there won’t be any girl after you who will be able to take your place, EVER. We take the words, “Till death do us apart” very very extremely seriously, because you mean so much to us. We don’t play anymore games with this girl. We will swear loyalty to you, even if we have to pay it with blood. And we were to give anything to you, we do not want to give things to the girl we love, something that will costs us NOTHING. It must be of high value, something we must pay with our sweat and blood for. So that you will know that you’re greatly loved and greatly valued in our eyes. The apple of our eyes… our one true love.

    This is precisely why we have set up so many defenses and hard to pass tests for you girl. Because we truly want to know if you’re really the one for us. Once we have swore loyalty to you, we rarely take it back, in fact almost never, like a 0.0000001% chance of that happening. Unless you hurt us extremely bad, to the point where we will block out communication with anyone who has hurt us. This is one zodiac sign whose loyalty rivals that of a farm dog. There is no other sign that represented with high loyalty. Mischievous, sexy, mysterious, charming and above all, loyal to you and you only.

    But because we have always been hurt in the past, either by ex-friends or ex-lovers or by people who we really trust and love, we harden our hearts to extreme levels. Never wanting to trust anyone anymore, from then on, seeking revenge and hatred dominates our hearts. We seek vengeance and power almost like blindly,

    Therefore if you really wanna ice down a scorpio’s heart, it is incredibly difficult. You will end up loving us and trying for years, and no matter who you are with thereafter, you will never forget us. Yet there is great reward for anyone who actually manages to break through a scorpio man’s heart

    Here’s some tips if you’re struggling with winning your scorpio man back.

    Some will advise you not to take action, let him chase after you, some will advise you to go after him because your heart SAYS so. Whichever decision you take, do it with sincerity, don’t play games or multi-layered games, we see right through them, our eyes see through everything, nothing escapes, but we will act like we don’t, so that you will let your guard down and we can find out your true motives. Just be yourself, come as you are. If he really loves you… from the bottom of his heart, HE WILL MAKE A MOVE. It might be subtle or it might be more… more….. elaborate, like kissing, touching or *ahem*. In any case, you will know.

    I know our sting hurts, it’s like our auto defense mechanism, on behalf of my fellow scorpio bros, if you have been stung before, I deeply apologize. We have no ill intentions.

    I hope this helps the ladies here into understanding why scorpios react as they are. And for those trying to get your scorpio man back, I believe you WILL. Don’t give up hope, be patience, touch him with your sincerity, we’re really suckers for that, it’s like our damn weak point =/.

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