Have you lost a Virgo? Do you want to win him back? Then all you have to do is be perfect. Obviously, he left you because you were somehow inefficient.
The first thing you need to do is take a fearless inventory of yourself, and identify all of your human flaws. Then eradicate them.
It could be that you did not improve in the face of his relentless criticism. Don’t get me wrong, I know you tried, but surely you missed a spot [on the dishes/his favorite shirt]. You might not have seen it, but he did. You see, that’s your problem — you just don’t see.
What? I’m sounding like the Virgo who dumped you? Stop being so sensitive! Here I am, telling you how to rid yourself of all your imperfections, and you complain! No wonder he left you!
About Jeffrey Kishner
Hi there,
I think I posted a couple months ago telling about my story with my Virgo guy but I’ll just make a quick summary.
We met through a dating site. We instantly clicked and started to spend a lot of time together. He was always so attentive, careful, polite, always complimenting me, buying me everything, etc. After only 2 weeks, he kissed me and we dated that night. Spent the night together but just hugging and cuddling, no sex. The next day he was perfect: called me, came by my place with a bag full of groceries cuz I had told him my fridge was empty. I was in 7th heaven.
Then after 2 days, he told me he wanted to stop everything and go back to where we were before, take our time. He also admitted he had met a girl a couple weeks before he met me (she lives 200 miles away). They had kissed one night but she didn’t want to hurt any of us so he prefered to be single for the moment while figuring things/his life out (he had lost his grandpa who he was very close to and has a lot of stress at work). He told me he really loved me and didn’t want to lose me.
So we kept seeing each other. He introduced me to all of his best friends, his colleagues. He would take me everywhere (movies, concerts, to the park, dinner, etc). His attitude hadn’t changed. He was always very tactile, holding me in his arms, hugging me, always paying for everything, etc.
Then, 2 weeks later, he suddenly told me that he wanted to be friends with me cuz he had seen that girl again and they had started dating… Although she lives 200 miles away, he wanted to give it a try. Of course, I was heartbroken.
Now, I want him back. Especially that, although he pretends he wants to be friends, he always has a very ambiguous attitude. As I said, he is always hugging me, holding me in his arms, texting me, etc. A couple weeks ago, we went out and had too much to drink so I crashed at his place and ended up sharing his bed. He woke me up a couple times cuz he was spooning or stroking my hair and kissing my forehead while I was sleeping. He has even invited me to go on holiday and spend NY’E with him and his friends. On the other hand, since he started dating her, he travels the 200 miles every 2 weekends to see her and has introduced her to his brother. But does that really mean anyhting?
One of his friends has told me to quit because he wants to TRY with the other girl. But another one told me to just be patient.
What do you think? Do I stand a chance? What should I do?
Part of me feels like I have to go and tell him he has to make a choice or he’ll never see me again. But it might be too radical and I’m afraid to lose him and his friends (who I’ve grown very close to).
The other part feels like I should play it smart and stay around and subtly win him back. But how?
Please. Help me .
‘some Virgo traits he definitely has, like expecting the best, being critical, seeking perfection…but others he doesn’t, like being really organised, neat freak etc…he’s clean cut and tidy but he’s not obsessive about it.’
mine doesnt act like virgo descriptions to a T either. he is scorpio rising. aqua moon. merc and venus in leo and taurus venus.
Until you know where he stands..have a life! Go do what makes u happy and imo, don’t wait around for maybe’s. Mine likes that i am not a ‘ball and chain’ person. i dont need him to call me all the time and I never did. Now that wants a relationship, he calls/texts me like every friggin hour . LOL (we’re ldr for the moment)
Okay I have posted several times about me and my Virgo man, I hate that it seems to always be on again off again, I have learned that he seems to always come back to me, and if I wait him out he is always back, trying to pick things up where they left off, but the last time he seemed much different, he seemed to be more caring and gentle with me, and then since saturday I have only heard a very few words from him, so I don’t know if he is trying to brake it of with me completely or if it is just another of his needing time to think things over, He is so frustrating sometimes, I care for him deeply, and have such a physical attraction to him, and I know he is very attracted to me physically but not sure he is emotionally attached, IDK what to think of him, He lives about a 3 hr. drive away from me, but he has come to meet up with me on two occasions, he was hoping for us to be totally alone, and neither time did that happen, the last time he said “I wanted to kiss you so bad” but he didn’t and I knew he was feeling that because I felt it comming from him, I said what if I had just kissed you and he said I would have kissed you back, but is it only physical with him or is it emotional also?? does he have feelings for me, because I know he is not going to come out with them feelings even if they are there, in fact about 6 months ago he told me he had no feelings for me in any way, and I was really hurt, Being a pisces can really have it’s drawbacks with a man like him, but I also know it has it’s advantages with him also, I know he is drawn to me, but what is it that draws him back? He is the one who has initiated the contact the last time, not me, he flirts so bad with me, but I know that is part of his charm, so what should I do? Should I just give up and move on? or should I ignore him, like he has me in the past? or should I be there to talk to him anytime he is ready to talk? I really want this man in my life, I really care for him, and lets face it he is SEXY as hell!!…. and whom can resist SEXY like that??
@HisGirl:
The key to knowing where you stand with a Virgo man is to IGNORE him…always be busy and unavailable…make him feel as though he has lost his chance with you….and see how he reacts…you have to set the standard for a Virgo or they will walk all over you…right now, he is controlling whatever relationship you guys have..take the control away from him and hone it….be busy, independent, strong and a non-nonsense woman…and he will fall hard
Ok so Virgo guy and myself are together right! Well he works out of town a lot. However, I’m patient for my love. Here’s the deal Virgo is back in own, Virgo tells me he wants me all to himself not to keep my options open. I was reluctant bc I’m scared to get hurt. However, I said ok I am willing to try and be committed to him and exclusive. He’s under the impression I’m not tho. I don’t get why. Told me one day he wants a woman to be with him only not everyone else. I loooooovvvve him and I know he’s absolutely in love w me. Guarded but he’s in love w me. I’m guarded too. He scares me a little bc I know he could crush me. He dodged me the other nite …we were suppose to go out and he just kept dodging. I was hurt n upset bc he knew I was ready and waiting on him. He said he was tired and exhausted. Told him it was not cool and told him basically to figure out what he really wants from me cause he asked me to be all in. I’m trying and now I feel like he’s not. He texted me bf and said I promise I’m not dodging you I wanna c u just exhausted. I was hurt so I said what I said. He obviously got upset just said goodnite and didn’t hear from him at all the next day and I didn’t contact him at all. Hurt me. I was really confused. So the next day after I texted him said morning…thinking about you…he said emmmm huh… I said I think about him all the time. Told him I didn’t think he wanted to hear from me yesterday. I was processing. I asked if he missed me even tho he’s totally irritated w me. He replied..I’m still irritated with you. I said don’t be anymore. I was too direct with him yesterday and I’m sorry for that. I was irritated with u too but don’t want to fight you’re only here little time before you leave me again. Miss you xoxo…He just he’s driving brb. I texted again hours later saying chin on you, miss your face can’t be irritated w me forever life’s to short and you still love me ..thinking bout you time to be nice love you….still no word. WHAT GIVES?! Really? Is he seriously acting like a big baby over something so minute?! Jesus! He’s killing me. I know he’s a processor. But really he’s a grown ass man. Why avoid me. So childish. Help … Wtf do I do? We aren’t broken up that I know of. Ugh!!!!
Ok so after 3 days Virgo man texts me kinda flirts with me… says hes not mad at me any more…. any way he’s been distant but still texting me. I told him I miss him and will miss him while hes out on business again. Of course he just avoids to respond with I will miss you too although I know he wants to say it. LOL Oh well… I don’t know what to do except be myself. show him I love him, I care, I will miss him and hope he will come back to me… we never really broke up he was just pissy and escaped for 3 days and then boom came back…but what do I do because I can tell hes been nonchalant and kinda not wanting to let me go but not wanting to be his lovey self again… hmmm help?
@taurus01: idk if you have figured out your situation but I am a Virgo woman, though I’m on the last day and sometimes tip over to Libra, I have a close friend who’s a Virgo. They do love you and miss you. They may even say that to you but they are “cold” ish by nature. Kinda like “I expect you to know I love you. Stop asking me if I do!”
I also know that I like to have my time to think things out, figure out what I want. If I want something I will go out and get it, even if I hurt others because it’s mine and only mine (that’s likely what he meant with wanting to be exclusive).
Probably distant with you because that’s how it seems but once he feels comfortable with the situation then he’ll come around. I know sometimes when I don’t talk to people I really really care about I get really cold and odd… kinda like “soo…how are things..” and obviously the other person is upset like “fine. you?” and then I get discouraged and try to make small talk etc… then get really upset and give up and retreat.
Point is the Virgo is really giving but not very confident.
Had a high-school crush on a Virgo Guy. We flirted around but never connected back then.. ran into him & he was all over me (kinda drunk).. lost connection again. We became Facebook friends 7 months ago I left a mssg saying hi , he replyd with his #..we chatted made plans he flaked..2mnths later we finally had drinks(he was 2 hrs late by the way) he called me baby & all that… we even sent sexy pics to each other..everything was going great around mid summer. Text got even sexyer. Made plans to go out. ..I flaked ..he invited me to come watch a movie @ his place… i was late this time but with very good reason…i get there & his friends happened r there too. They kinda seemd like jerks but kept making there comments sound like it was all in fun..idk. my Virgo starts to sing sum song about how great of a lover he is, then he rubbed my arm..then the side of my thigh… even calld me beautiful rt b4 he starts talking endlessly about sum girl on sum TV show & how perfect she was… then referred to me as sweetheart and got back playing cards with his friends. .I left shortly after thinking things went smooth.. he text the next day saying he had a great time with me.. I replyd &told hm about something nasty I was gonna do to him.. he rpld with ” OK…Cool” then said he likes being FRIENDS ..& that sex with me was not a big deal anyway because it was taking so long anyway. .. WTF .how could things change within a 14 HR time ? Was it me? It was that time of month. .but I was clear about nothing sexual. .. was it his friends the jerks …is iy sum1 else? Is he playing hard 2get? (He is really hot) idk .. but i strongly feel this Guy is the 1. ( he is also a little suspicious… and I heard Virgo guys can be controlling ) only called to say hi 1 time within 2 weeks can’t get the damn guy off my mind though. …HEEEEEELLP
The best way to get a virgo man back is to IGNORE him. This is a game they play push and pull to gain control of themselves and the relationship. I promise he will come running back….just give him space and get on with your life.
I’m a Virgo woman and we don’t look back. We overanalyze everything before we leave a relationship so by the time we cut the cord we have made an emotional shutdown as well. We become cold and will even say mean things to make sure you stay away. We’re like that because in a relationship we forgive and overlook so many things that it builds up because we have trouble standing up for ourselves or communicating our needs. People have a hard time reading us, yet for some reason we expect our significant others to know exactly how we feel. Even if we don’t communicate it. We generally have low self esteem but we have enough back bone for self preservation and knowing when to walk away. When in love, we are completely dedicated to that person. Money,time, distance, etc. is not a concern for the ones we love. No one else can capture our attention when we are in love. Virgos are for people that really want a traditional relationship. Don’t get involved in one unless you are looking to settle down. Ask their opinion on things because we like to feel helpful and give us lots of compliments. Hope this helps.