Aquarius man acting very distant
November 17, 2006 by Jeffrey Kishner
It’s not an act, honey. Your Aquarius man is very distant.
Aquarius is an air sign. This element is associated with the mind. Like his brothers Libra and Gemini, Aquarius is not very in touch with his feelings.
In addition, the Water Bearer is ruled by Uranus, a planet that is literally and figuratively not of this world. Your guy feels at home thinking about the sky (astrophysics, astrology), not mundane earthly matters like intimate relationships. In fact, he’s just not that into … intimacy (thought I had you there!). The collective, the group — he does care about humanity, but he is concerned by virtue of his objective distance.
Aquarius is also an independent sign. He does not like to be fenced in. And since Aquarius is an unyielding fixed sign, your very act of pushing him to be emotionally present with you rings his alarm. In response, he becomes stubbornly closed off to you.
What to do? Give him some space … he’ll show up for you when he’s had time to sort this out in that brilliant noggin of his.
Comment below: How have you dealt with a distant Aquarius man?
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i think ruth is very right. We all have to learn to accept each other for who we are and not find falt or blame in it. Being an aqua woman myself i can assure you, alot of times we don’t realize we’re distant or erratic or offbeat. we think our behavior is perfectly normal. And we we’re willing to compromise and do whats fair, but to certain degrees to expect us to be different is like asking us to change our autopilot. It can be frustrating, as it is to deal with any other signs personality traits. Virgos with meticulousness, geminis with their mischievous chatter, pisces with their fantasy world, scorpios with their secrets, taurus with their stubborness, aries with their tempers, sags with there devil may care attitude, cancers with delicate hearts, libras with wishy washiness, capricorns with their relentlessness, leos with their glamourous needs. We all have our ways. Either learn to accept and deal with it and use it to your advantage or opt out.
I certainly didn’t mean to imply that all aquas are abusers. I am just saying that this guy fits some of the characteristics mentioned here. I still think he has the markings of being abusive, but not because he’s an Aquarius.
hiyas, here is the thing. My life is filled with these little buggers. Im a cap with gem moon and libra rising. My mom, my kid, one of my best friends and now a new intrest – all aquas. Need nurturing companionship? Naw, how about a playmate who isnt available when you need them. So I should really know better by now. My own mother fancied our relationship as “More like good friends” and aquariuses excuse themselves from your life with ease because you are “just friends”.
Ive found a new aqua guy too, that I find just adoreable. He doesnt get to see me often, but he is just as busy as he claims. He will go a couple of days sometimes without talking or txting me and Im lucky if I get to see him once a week. This kinda drives me nuts, and seems unnormal, how can you possibily get to know someone if you are so far away?
Some of these threads talk about an aqua disapearing for 3 weeks the comming back like its nothing. Seriously? Id naturally assume Id been dumped in that period of time. If you wanted to be with somebody wouldnt that be too long to be away? Seriously! Even if you are not sure if you are looking to build a relationship, why would you wanna go without sex that long?
I’m getting involved with an Aquarius man recently. Since early this year (about April or so), he and I have been getting awfully close. Slow process, but still, we are pretty close now. I never knew his sign until today, and gosh, does it explain his distance/slow responses. I am an Aries and well, even though he takes his time a LOT, I like him a lot, and I would love it if he and I could make a relationship work. It’s complicated right now though. Or perhaps I’m the one making it complicated!
Long story into a short one. He has been coming to my house, visiting me, talking to me, listening to me, and treated me so well since early this year, and it hasn’t been dying down at all. In fact, I feel as if it’s just getting started. We have been… “Messing around” a lot in the middle of us being there for each other. He actually talks to me about how he feels and it does me good to help him, as he helps me.
So he and I are real steady and have become great friends! But… Truly, I would love it if he approached me and made it… Official, in some way or another.
Problem is… He doesn’t want to hurt me. He has been telling me these months since he and I got more involved (after my Libra soulmate and I departed our own ways) that he “holds [me] precious” and can’t allow anything bad to happen between us. He’s really cautious. And he has been thinking so much! To think that he and I would be in a relationship right now, were he more decisive! Plus, he is distant. Well, he keeps a distance, and I respect it, but it’s not an awkward distance. It’s the “you know why we have to be distant and it’s okie, I still love you” type of distance. I have to be honest. I’ve been waiting and after “messing around” and being there for each other so much, it’s perhaps taking too long.
What could I do other than wait so that he may approach me sooner, or at all? He has told me what he feels for me already, and so have I. But now it’s just all up to him. I’ve been myself and I have been very good to him.
I have to admit though, I’ve been very difficult, as always, so he was the one that had to approach me (as a way of me knowing whether he truly is interested and meant what he said or not, and he does), but nowdays I’ve been approaching him more, so he was happier. Should I approach him perhaps a tad more? I don’t want to smother him and drive him away… My soulmate left me and… Well, he is my soulmate. I’ve moved on, but my soulmate will always be in my heart, God bless him. And yes, the man I’ve been seeing knows about him and how I feel for him.
@maranova – the answer to that question is we dont realize its been that long. And even if we do, we occupy ourselves with THOUGHTS about you (and sex, hehe) and that’s just as good, if not sometimes better than the real thing. We’d actually sometimes rather be sending you I miss you texts than asking how your day was everyday. This is just our way. Our distance is no reflection of you nor our feeelings for you. But on the other hand, aquas are full of paradoxes. If we get a bug up our to see you and fixate on it, nothing will stop us from it and we’ll get angry if we don’t get our way. Not because we need things to BE our way, we just want what we want when want and can’t stop until we get it.
And yes we are more like cherished playmates and thats how we look at the people we care about. And my mrealtionship with my mother and my daughter (who is fortunately an aqua herself) is very much like good friends than traditonal boundaries of heirachy. But i think its more special that way.
@amarosa – he’s being cautious because he cares. he thinks alot about things and he wants it to all be right. there is no how long is to long in a quas world. One, we have no real concept of time and two, we don’t mind taking our time to make sure everything is how we wish it to be. Just go with it. Dont be threatened by this desire to be thorough in covering all the basis, to get all the information accounted for and disected out and arranged. He’s just weaving his web around you. And he doesnt want there to be any faulty links in it. When its just right, and his formulations all worked out, he’ll be very forthcoming about what he wants to do next. And he won’t take no for an answer.
I Have been dating an Aqua for over a year, and I have found hey are truly the strangest creatures on this earth, Nice, Lovable, thoughful careing, But will disappear before lighting clears the sky. It use to really trouble me, Hell it still does, but I know that it’s just who he is., When I feel that he is getting in touch with his emotions, that is a sure time I know he will disappear for a week or more, then come back like he just spoke with me the evening before. He is unpredictable, his mind changes before the wind can reach it’s distination., it use to drive me insane, but the longer I know him I understand him at least I try it can be maddening sometimes, he truly does not want to unveil himself to anyone, as crazy as it sounds I enjoy his insanity some days, it keeps the mistery about him going, I want to know what else do you have behind your back. I belive he cares deeply for me, but I’m not sure he will ever label it as Love, at least not verbally., He has said good by a few times, then , he back with his charm & how deeply he misses the relationship., Ther are days I feel like he is making a fool of me , but deep in my heart I truly belive that he does not intend to cause me any harm , that he is running from himself. Ther are times I feel so cheated because I like closeness some times, not to smother but he will never stay around to ever let that happen, sometimes I feel sorry for him, because I know he wants to be loved Yeah I know on his terms, I just understand his fear., but I love his wacky ways, but I still want him to settle in just a bit, not smothering but enough to relax more than a flash of light.
Hi, I totally agree.. I have a "friend" who useto be my ex.. we been at this for 13yrs.. He can't leave me alone.. N honestly neither can't I.. anyhoo. yes we make love… I don't expect nothing from him, only to be a glentel man… But, when I least expect it he gives me this look.. that says I love u… hhaaha.. he's so cute…..
sorry, not used to the new system yet, dint mean to reply under ur topic, I will post in the regular section
So aqua guy hasnt bothered to hang out with me since hallows. We still message each other every few days, but I dont even ask anymore if he will have any time for me. He does have a crazy schedule, works full time, is in a band and I work on his days off. My friends tell me that he still should be able to find time if I was anything to him. Kinda funny because he was the one leading things in the first place, making sure that it was more than just physical, introducing me to his friends, wanting me to bring my friends by, going out and just staying in, spending time. It seemed like a pretty promising start. Then he cant seem to find time for me. I told him that I understood he was busy but I couldnt help but feeling blown off. Instead of responding he went on to tell me how his weekend went lol. Nothing changed so I pretty well gave up. Then after not hearing from me from me for a few days he bout talked my ear of last night wanting to know how Ive been. Seems very much like he is still interested but still staying away.
I dunno, maybe dating an aquarius who is also a musician wont work for me. Ive never been a girl who was content sitting around watching her guy play basket ball and such. I like attention and would rather spend time with somebody who can give it to me. The tricky thing with aqua guys is, you chase them to much, they scare away. If you back off too much they will let you slip away.
So my question to all aquas out there, how can we win with you? The only answer I see anywhere here is that we are supposed to alow you to ignore us as we hope you come wandering back. I would say he doesnt even like me except Im way into astrology and I see account and account here of aqua guys pulling the same thing.
So we know they do this, and then come back. Ok , so how about this, How often do you find that they stay gone and DONT come back. Is that just as common?